Resentment
by hidden.dreams7
Summary: An old enemy of Jeff’s Tracy enters Alan’s life, Alan and Jeff’s relationship is tested to the brink. Alan is desperate to escape his past and his family, but secrets, dishonesty and danger are his destiny, and that’s before he joins IR. COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

When an old enemy of Jeff's Tracy enters Alan Tracy's life, Alan and Jeff's relationship is tested to the brink. Alan is desperate to escape his past and his family, but hidden secrets, dishonesty and danger are his destiny, and that's before he joins IR.

This story is a replacement and re-write of Façade, a story I posted over five years ago. I don't have any rights to any F1 teams or the characters.

Resentment

Chapter one

Opportunities and old opponents

After shutting the laptop to erase the image that had been emailed to him by his second eldest brother Virgil, Alan Tracy considered his actions. The photo was taken at last years benefit in memory of his mother, and seeing it made the young man considered the past months and the direction his life was taking. Also in the email, as in many others his brothers had sent, the message was that Alan desperately needed to call his father to apologize for his actions recently. That email may have been erased but that wouldn't stop them trying to contact him by emails, calls or other methods to locate him that his family had tried. All his brother's emails consisted of the same content, he was lectured on what he was doing and why, and all of them wanted to know Alan's location. Alan had replied to the odd email at first, but as time went on Alan replied less and less, as he still had no desire to see his father. After a blazing arguments based on deep rifts between to two men, Alan now had nothing left to say to his father. Nevertheless Jeff Tracy was going to have a lot to say to his son, and Alan knew it, he was about to publicly announce his new career and therefore completely disobey his father.

"Alan we're starting in ten minutes you ready to make history?" The voice spoke from the door of a small make shift dressing room, which only contained Alan and a few other belongings.

"Everything okay?" This time there was a hint of concern in the voice of his boss, as he noted the troubled look on the young man's face.

"Yep I'm fine. I was just thinking about the press." Alan looked up at his new boss, he knew that was a lie that neither he, nor the British billionaire Richard Barton believed.

"Right… It is a big day today I suppose, but Alan I have all the faith I need in you. You're a going to be a world class formula one driver." Richard smiled as Alan dipped his head showing his uncertainty in his abilities and moved uncomfortably in his driving suit.

"That's thanks to you Rick, racing in Formula Two was great but no one was willing to take a chance on me, except you."

Even considering his position at that moment, Alan still held a great deal of disbelief in his mind at his current situation. Not long ago he had graduated, just, and told his family he had only a desire to race cars in the future, not go to college. That Alan uncomfortably recalled was a bad night, his father had been furious. Alan was called ungrateful, and had been forbidden from the racing. Without Alan's knowledge Jeff Tracy had decided his wild, reckless youngest son's path for him, he was to train with NASA to be an astronaut. Unknown to Alan this was necessary for a project that Jeff had been working on for many years, the plans were in the final stages but Jeff needed another trained pilot, and astronaut. His three eldest sons were already training and designing rescue equipment for any possible emergency; his final two sons would assist soon. However Alan's laughter and complete dejection at joining NASA didn't quite fit in with that plan. Jeff had expected Alan to not be too taken with the idea; especially as Alan had no interest in space or engineering at all, but Alan wanting to drive in F1 was a shock. Both had exchanged hateful remarks, Alan disclosed accusation of years of this father wanting nothing to do with him, while Jeff had let slip he was disappointed in Alan. That night Alan stormed out, only returning later in the night to pack his stuff and disappear by his bedroom window at three in the morning. That night Alan had left to follow his dreams, and since that day he hadn't returned. Alan had thrown away his cell phone and not spoken to any of his so called family, but with no money from a frozen back account, he was struggling after a week. Alan had been surprised that not a single F1 team was willing to give him a chance at being a driver despite his fantastic junior record.

Richard Barton stared down at his new rising star, he knew Alan's future would be impressive in F1, but that alone was not the purpose behind his large personal support for Alan's career. The business tycoon had created a bombshell in the business world by reducing the amount of hours he spent on ring leading his multi-national corporation to focus on a Formula One team. Barton industries only main rival in the business world was Tracy Corporation, and both were well known global companies.

"Alan I know you are going to be a champion. F1 has always been an interest to me and once I bought a team I wanted to see what it's really like, I wanted new drivers, and you're one of them." Richard Barton smiled before continuing.

Alan still looked uncertain and nervously ran his hands through his blond locks. This was a big step for him, and apart from Richard, he had no support from anyone.

The billionaire crouched down to Alan's sitting position and held the young mans shoulder.

"Alan. You have talent, passion, ambition and such strength." He paused before continuing.

"You're just like your mother." Alan looked up to meet his bossed eyes while that statement reminded Alan of when the two first met.

_Flash back seven months earlier_

"Hi Alan." Shocked by his name being called Alan looked at the source of the voice, a well dressed, light brown haired man looking in his fortes smiled down at him from the end of the row of red seats.

"Hi…" Alan looked at the man surprisingly.

"Do I know you?" he stated questioningly.

Alan had come to sit in the cool late night air of the Parola sands stadium, away from the high profile party being held inside the business suite for drivers and managers. This was Alan's last ditch attempt to get a F1 team to take him on, if not his dreams were over. He had been included in the party because he trained with some of the drivers who had just been signed this year to teams, but no teams inside wanted to sign him. His coach had tried, Alan had tried, but he was rejected before he even began.

"Sorry let me introduce myself." Why he was surprised that Alan had no clue to who he was made him smile.

"Richard Barton" Alan competed his companions sentence for him after recalling the billionaires name.

After nodding to Alan in confirmation Richard moved closer to his companion and sat on one of the fold down seats near the young blond driver. Alan's big cerulean eyes looked distant and lost as they examined the stadium before them. Alan's demeanour was very different Richard noticed from the happy ten year old he appeared to be when they last met. That had occurred by accident when an elevator broke at a major business conference many years ago, Richard had been trapped with the then ten year old Alan Tracy and his nanny for many hours. Richard became amazed at the boy before him that day, and had always kept his eye on the boy ever since.

Alan sat back in his seat and adjusted his designer suit and tie, both which had been forgotten about when he came out of the party to face the rejection he had been dealt. Today the rejection wasn't a shock but three months ago it was. Despite very early interest in Alan, and a near enough promise to be guaranteed a place in the team, the dream was ended fast. One call from a large supplier to the teams, who wasn't happy about the rumours of himself as a future racer, ended Alan's ambitions. That man, Alan believed was his father. The family name had haunted all the Tracy boys in different ways but here it was closing doors for the youngest Tracy son. Alan's father's company was a contractor to the teams, and no one wanted to risk losing a contractor for the sake of a kid with a dream.

After what seemed like minutes of silence, Alan uncomfortably turned to face is companion.

"I don't mean to be rude but how did you know who I am?" Alan quizzed, unlike Jeff Tracy, Richard Barton's company wasn't known to supply the making of a F1 car.

The elder turned to answer the young man's question, he had previously been deep in thought about how to answer Alan's question, before it was even asked.

"You look just like your mom." Alan internally caved, that was a thought every one who knew the Tracy family concurred on, but never spoke of. Something that Alan wished would change. The one thing that had dominated his life, and had always been the steel door between him and having a relationship with his father.

"Sorry". Barton noticed the unease of the young man by his words and cursed Jeff Tracy for it. Barton knew Tracy well; both were in the same Air Force class when they were younger. These days he only knew Jeff by what information he could gather, but still well enough to know he never spoke of his late wife. After meeting Alan in the elevator he was keen to keep aware of what was happening in Alan's life. Richard himself was devastated by Lucille's death, as they had dated before she was in a relationship with Jeff. Alan was like a carbon copy of her; a piece of her back from the grave. Richard Barton's distaste for Jeff Tracy, and interest in Alan only increased when Alan's nanny talked openly in the elevator about the fact she was raising Alan single handed. Due to Alan birth causing the death of his wife, Alan's nanny explained that Jeff was not being able to show any interest in him at all.

"Alan I was a very close to your mother, and I…knew… your father too."

Richard decided to leave it at that for his description of Jeff Tracy, to get into the deep unpleasant relationship that the billionaires had would be a story for another day. The two businessmen had strong disagreements. However this seemed to be something he and Alan had in common when dealing with Jeff Tracy.

Barton was quickly snapped out of his thoughts by Alan's movement.

"Oh...right...well I better get back inside." Alan began to get up from his seat; a friend of his father's was not what he needed now, and he was anxious to get away because of that.

"Alan I want to offer you a place at Mercedes McLaren as are top driver." That stopped Alan in his tracks and the young blond turned around with a look of amazement on his face.

"What?" Alan spoke quickly and Richard Barton smirked back at Alan.

Richard spoke with his hands out reaching to Alan to encourage him to sit back in his seat.

"Alan, I have just bought the majority of the shares in this aspect of the company and I am going to lead from the top. I want you as our driver, as you're the best there is. I have watched you race, spoke to your coach and your team mates; I know you could be a world champion. You just need to be given the chance based on your abilities, and not being judged by your surname." A proud smile was on Richard's face as he then moved to place his hand on the young man's shoulder.

The shocked expression on Alan's face turned to look at the hand on his shoulder.

"But…I thought you said you were friends with Jeff Tracy? You must know this is the last thing he wants me to do." Richard Barton eyes had a sparkle that Alan missed.

"Son, I said I was close to your mother, not your father. Don't worry about Jeff Tracy, I will deal with him." Richard spoke confidently and he noticed Alan was more relaxed by the idea that Jeff had nothing to do with this offer.

Alan had no need to consider for long, as the smile spread across his face.

"I would love to race for you!" Alan's whole face brightened and his eyes flashed with desire and dreams. The young driver shook his future bosses hand and followed him inside for more talks, for the first time in a long time he felt like he was being supported.

_Present day…_

Alan's thoughts from that day ended when Richard calling his name again, the mention of his mother by his boss had been near constant from there first meeting. However due to the lack of anyone speaking of his mom in his own family Alan's uneasiness on the topic was still as fresh.

"Sorry...I was just thinking." Alan fiddled with his sponsorship covered helmet and gloves as he sat ready to face the world's sporting press as the new driver in the circuit.

Richard spoke while he encouraged Alan up from his chair and into a hug.

"Alan you have nothing to feel bad about when I mention your mom; you're her son and she would be proud of you, just am much as I am."

The relationship between the two had grown dramatically over the previous months, just as Richard had wanted. He had taken Alan under his wing, he knew Alan was more than capable to be a fantastic driver; it was personally that he wanted to know the young man, and get the boy to know and trust him in return.

"Thanks, I don't know what I would do without you da…" Alan stopped there and pulled back from the embrace, not meeting Richards's eyes.

Alan considered his near name slip in his mind.

"Er…Sorry." Alan looked embarrassed.

Alan felt so indebt to the man before him; he had given him somewhere to live, which happened to be in Richard's own home, a new Mercedes, and an amazing contract with his company. What was more surprising to Alan was how interested he was in him. Richard himself, Alan soon found out had no children, and had been in love with his mother before Scott was born. The new details about his mom had just shown Alan how little he knew of her, which was no thanks to his father. He had been taught not to speak or ask about her when he was young, so had learnt so much about a woman he would never know personally. The thought of his father's anger had been on his mind ever since he left home. However Alan found himself beginning to care less and less over the years, he now no longer wanted his father's attentions as he had once before. The negative relationship he and his father had was starting to become his driving force for trying to win, and so get away from his past. Learning that Richard Barton was both a competitor to his father, that the two were not the slightest degree of friends had helped Alan trust his new boss. Alan had demised that he and Barton both had his mother has a major negative issue between having a good relationship with Jeff Tracy.

Richard couldn't help but smile at the boy before him as he left the room, what he had wanted from Alan was working, but more than that he was enjoying himself. Alan was a great young man and as he had discovered, so much like Lucy. However Alan personally was more shy and closed about his feelings, and had clearly not dealt with his past troubles. The young man was not used to having such a supporting personal relationship; therefore a close fatherly like relationship was developing. When Barton found out Alan had been staying with a friend he made sure the boy stayed with him in his newly bought mansion. Richard was pleased to find evidence that Alan was starting see him as a father figure more, and so also becoming bitterer towards Jeff Tracy based on the new knowledge he had supplied.

"I'll see you out there." Richard said proudly before closing the door behind him.

"Rachel, I wish you were here." Alan's voice was filled with emotion as his head fell forward. He had never cried since his former nanny, or to Alan, his mother, had died on a plane journey. The two had been inseparable, and along with Alan's eldest brothers had attempted to divert Alan's attention away from the boy wanting his father. However the day of Rachel's death Alan's father had decided that they were too close, after hearing his son call Rachel 'mom'. He therefore had kept Alan at home while Rachel went on vacation. Alan knew himself that he had never recovered from her death; but also from that day on he had never tried to develop a relationship with his father again.

"This way Alan." The blond left the room only to hear his coach calling him, the blond turned and headed in the same direction.

"No going back now." Richard spoke quietly when Alan appeared by his side.

"I know, but my dad is going to hate this." Alan replied, as he peered out towards the stage and the media pack.

"Don't worry about him, this is about you." Richard smiled before he moved out towards the press to introduce his drivers.

Alan considered Richards's words as he stood listening to Richard introduce his teammate. Since he was eleven Alan wanted nothing to do with his father, and Jeff had always kept his youngest at arms length. So much so Alan spent most of his teenage years running away from boarding school, trying to run away from boarding school, or being expelled. The constant disappointment and fighting with his father may have got Alan some attention but not of the kind he wanted, he hadn't had that since Rachel.

The blond smiled as he heard his name Richard was right, this was about him now.

Shaking his thoughts away Alan stepped towards Richard and the stage as the cameras rolled. The photographers flashed away, and Alan smiled standing next to his new boss, as he stood behind the sponsorship name of Barton industries. Alan appeared happy as the flashes went off but he knew he was about to deal with the negative consequences of his decision to chose his own path, and not his fathers.

Richard Barton smiled at the new pictures of himself and Alan that were to be printed in newspapers in the next weeks, the identity of the new drivers was being held back to boost publicity for the Australian Grand Prix . He knew what was to come with Alan and Jeff Tracy in the future, and all that did was please him. Alan was what he wanted, a son. A son abandoned and unwanted by Jeff Tracy, the man that had stolen his future wife.

Richard dropped the picture on to the desk, since meeting Alan when he was younger he had been waiting for the opportunity to get Alan away from Jeff Tracy and towards him. I get back a future Jeff Tracy stole from him.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two

Betrayals and backstabbing

The clock flashed 8.00am as it sat on the end of Jeff Tracy's long glass desk; Jeff briefly glanced at it and exhaled. He had been working a lot lately, on both normal CEO work and on International rescue planning and development. As the rain hammered on the windows that over looked the city Jeff looked up with anticipation as his videophone flashed.

"Hey dad." Jeff smiled at a happy looking and sun kissed Scott Tracy. He and Virgil had been overseeing the development at a tropical Island get away deep in the South Pacific for over three months now.

"Son, you look happy. How is everything going in paradise?" As his father spoke the eldest Tracy son knew that Alan hadn't been in touch with their father, as Jeff looked worried and tired, but he hid it well.

"Great, everything is going to plan. The house and hangers are finished, the machines are in order, oh and me and Virgil have picked our bedrooms." Jeff laughed as Virgil came into view eating a burger.

"Yep, I'm sorry dad but I got the biggest." Virgil's muffled words were just interpretable between mouthfuls, as Scott looked displeasingly over his shoulder at his brothers actions.

"Virgil you know we have to be fit for this rescue business, stop eating everything!" The two eldest brothers quarrelled in a brotherly manner over Virgil's meal, each fighting to grab the burger and both totally forgetting about their father on the line.

"Boys! I thought I was talking to my eldest sons not my youngest, stop it!" Jeff tried to sound mad, but couldn't help but laugh.

"Sorry dad." As Scott turned his attention to his father again, Virgil quickly finished the last bites of his meal.

"Speaking of trouble, you heard from Alan dad?" Virgil asked questioningly, while Scott had already seen the answer.

"No." It was quick and anyone who didn't know Jeff well would have thought he sounded uncaring, but his sons knew better.

"Has he emailed you again yet?" A glimmer of hope was in Jeff voice. Despite not contacting him, Jeff was at least pleased to here Alan had emailed his brothers to say he was okay in the past few months.

Scott looked unsettled as Alan had not been in contact now for over four months.

"Scott, don't blame yourself. Alan needed yelling at, he can't just disappear and expect us to be okay with it!" Virgil stuck his hand on Scott's shoulder as he spoke. After emailing back every two weeks, Alan had suddenly stopped after Scott had sent him an email telling him to grow up and come home. Scott had taken Alan leaving home hard; as Scott had always walked the line between Alan and their father. He loved Alan like a son, and fathered him in behaviour more then he acted like a brother. Scott had always said he couldn't help it as there was more than ten years between them in age.

"Dad he'll call soon." Virgil meant it as a statement of fact, but Jeff wasn't so sure.

"Anyway dad, were off to check on the machines tomorrow so we will come by when were done and see you in New York." Virgil said to try to spark a smile on his father's face.

"That would be nice son, but don't wear those shorts here, it's raining outside!" Scott laughed at his father's words, as Virgil looked down at his legs.

"Dad if he wore those shorts at home he would be arrested by the fashion police." Scott ducked and then lifted his hands up in surrender as his brother tried to punch him.

"Bye boys, take care. Call me when you're in New York." With that the island paradise background and his sons was taken away. Yet again Jeff heard the rain against the windows as he sat in the silence thinking, only the knock on his door disturbed his thoughts.

"Come in." Jeff Tracy returned to his powerful deep voice having a military background meant his ability to switch from casual to command mode was well practised.

"Good morning Mr Tracy." The chirpy voice belonged to the young man who entered his office. Peter Hemmings had become Jeff's new assistant in the past months. Jeff had first met the young man before him as he took his new chief engineer, and the designing of IR's craft, back to a child care home where Brains and Peter both had been placed. The young man in front of the billionaire was desperate to work for him, just as his ex foster care companion was doing. Peter had explained that his father had abandoned him and his mother along ago, and after his mother died Peter was placed in care. While Peter didn't have the amazing intellect of Brains, or the engineering and science abilities, Jeff Tracy still offered Peter a job in his company. However Jeff soon found out that the twenty three year old wanted to spend his time at Tracy Corporation with Jeff himself. Jeff had therefore given in and allowed the young man to shadow him in the business for a while as his assistant. The enthusiasm and hope that Jeff had wanted him to work with him had given Peter a new beginning and a new future. However Jeff had been totally surprised when the boy had expected to be living at the Tracy home with him. While taken aback by the idea at first Jeff felt compelled to go along with it for a short time due to Peter's past situation.

Breaking Jeff's thoughts about his assistant was quickly done by the young man as he went through the details of the days work.

"You have a meeting at 10.00 am Mr Tracy with senior management, and then..." The dark hair young man adjusted his glasses and had a confused look on his face as he shuffled through the papers in his hands.

"…Sorry Mr Tracy I can't find where you are this afternoon, let me go check the computer again." The slim nervous man stormed towards the door, as Jeff rose to his feet.

"Wait!" Peter turned back as the billionaire stood and spoke.

"Peter I have no plans this afternoon." The billionaire hadn't told the young man about the project and had no plans too.

"Oh," Again the young man looked nervous and worried.

"But, you always work all day." That was more like a statement of fact, and held an underlining concern that he was not being included in something, which Jeff missed.

The billionaire smirked, as he moved to get a cup of coffee.

"Thanks Peter for the compliment, but not this afternoon, you can take the afternoon off too." Jeff returned to his desk and began to study a document on the computer as the young man nodded and shut the door behind him.

Peter Hemmings was concerned as he stood behind the door to his boss's office, he may have only worked in this role for three months now but in that time he had learnt everything possible about the Tracy family. He had become certain that by trying to fit in with the Tracy's he could have a family that had wanted all his life. He had researched all the boys and Jeff himself, but by living at the Tracy home he could get to see the Jeff Tracy few ever saw.

Peter returned to his desk as the day's newspapers were delivered to him so that he could check them over to see if anything was in them that needed Jeff's attention. As the young man sat down and considered what Jeff could be doing this afternoon his eyes saw the back of the paper and a familiar name.

After only a few days both living and working with Jeff Tracy, Peter had done enough research on the family and Jeff to know the key to Jeff's life were his sons. Today's newspaper had given him the opportunity he needed to plan a way to be part of this family, to become a Tracy.

Peter grabbed the paper and left his big black chair to once again see his boss. As he entered the room he began to rub his back through his oversize suit, which had belonged to Gordon Tracy before he borrowed it.

"Yes Peter" Jeff looked up to Peter curiously as he hobbled in the room.

"Mr Tracy I…" Jeff cut him off as he raised his hand up in the air.

"I have told you before Peter, its Jeff." The eldest Tracy continued to type on his computer, Jeff Tracy's manner and attitudes were kind and open which was what Peter had found so appealing and surprising.

"Sorry…Jeff…oh!" Jeff Tracy looked up with concern as his assistant moaned before he began rubbing his back.

"Everything okay Peter?" Jeff looked at him with confusion.

"Yeah, its nothing really, just a bit of pain in my back." Jeff looked concerned, and Peter was so touched by that idea.

"Well if you want you can take the whole day off and get some rest." Jeff added as he took a sip of coffee.

"No, no. Its just I was wondering if I maybe could sleep in one of the boys rooms as I think I have hurt my back on the sofa bed." The brown eyes and pale face of the young man looked intentionally sad.

"Well, Peter… I'm not too sure. It's just the boys have there own rooms and some of them will be home soon." Jeff Tracy stumbled through his answer, he wanted to help this young man before him, but he meant mostly on a professional level.

"I know that you're boys mean everything to you Jeff, and I know Scott and Virgil will be home for a few days soon, so I thought I could stay in Alan's room." Peter examined Jeff's face as he said those words; he was well aware that Alan had left home months ago.

Jeff rose to his feet and came around to sit on the front of his desk near were his assistant was standing. I did feel sorry for Peter and wanted to help him in any way but he was still certain Alan would be home soon, he had to be. Peter noticed Jeff's hesitation and decided to take advantage, as he knew Jeff was about to say no.

"Jeff I hate to say this but…Alan's not coming back to you." Peter spoke with warmth but firmness in his voice, while Jeff's head quickly rose while his face had a disturbed look on it.

"What that's not true Peter. Alan is angry but he is going to have to come back soon, he has no money, and his training is starting soon for NASA." Jeff had a determined aspect to his voice; but the hint of concern about the length of time his son had been missing was ignored by Peter.

Jeff smiled quickly at his assistant before he got up to move back at his chair, Peter realised his opportunity and blocked his way with the newspaper. Jeff stopped in his traces and took the paper from Peter only to stare down at a image of his youngest son smiling next to Richard Barton. Jeff's eyes left the image only to read the headline, he then spoke only to give Peter instructions before quickly sitting back down at his desk.

"Get me Richard Barton's number will you Peter." Anger and resentment was easily seen on Jeff's face and in his voice by seeing the picture before him, so much so Jeff missed the smile on Peter's face as he left the room.

"Alan what have you done?" Jeff Tracy sat concerned as he stared at the newspaper on his desk; he had utter disbelief at the headline he was reading.

'**Barton's new McLaren F1 driver is his rival's son!'**

'Alan Tracy abandons his father as he signs for the opposition'

Alan Tracy stretched out his body as the silk sheets moved around him he opened his eyes to see a brunette getting dressed near the window. It was only then that the young driver felt his handover kick in from his long delayed party to celebrate signing his new contract. In his quick visit home before the grand prix in a few days time Alan had managed a 'gentle' night out. He had spent the five weeks since the photo launch in Australia with Richard on the track, this trip home was only for the public release of the details of the new drivers. Richard's business partner Ben James had a chain of private bars and clubs, so Alan had taken advantage of the VIP treatment as he had on so many other occasions in the past six months.

As Alan sat up and yawned he began to remember the night's events, Alan was always very popular with the girls his model looks and contained self ego stood out more than some men of his age. Alan always remembered that Rachel had taught him good manners and the proper way to treat women. However last night was slightly different, he remembered having sex with her, but not her name. The young blond felt sort of guilty about that, while he considered how much he drank, and why he did so.

"Hi." Alan smiled through his discomfort.

"Hey." The brunette turned and Alan remembered why he had been attracted to her, she was like Lana.

"Listen I've got to go but I had a great time last night, if you're around again call me." The un-named brown eyed girl smiled at him again as she slipped back into her red dress. Alan considered she was his desired type, not skinny but a little curvy, sexy but not excessively showing it. However last night was only sex, his true feelings were elsewhere with another brunette, who he was struggling to forget about.

"That's okay. Do you need a ride home Kate?" Alan snapped his attention back to the current girl in his bedroom, as her name came back to him.

"No, don't worry I know this area. I've just called a cab. Thanks anyway." The girl smiled finally at Alan before she exited the room.

Kate again took in the large and expensive house as she left; the two silver Mercedes and two Aston Martin's outside only confirmed her idea that Alan's family must be wealthy. At first Kate had been unsure about Alan when he asked her if she wanted a drink; she had expected a large ego and confident attitude when she took in Alan's appearance. However despite expecting an egoistic attitude Alan surprised her by his intelligence and level headedness. Despite this she noted on many occasions Alan's eyes seemed distant and troubled.

Alan's head hit the black silk sheets again as he rubbed his hands through his hair, but sat up sharply by the sound of the door re opening.

"Wow someone got some last night." Richard Barton came in dressed in a charcoal suit with a white shirt; he smiled smugly at the teenager as he did up his blue tie.

"Erm, sorry... about that…her…I erm should have asked you or something…" Alan trailed off in embarrassment as he looked up at his boss who came to sit on the bed across from him.

"Alan, I have told you before this is your home too! You don't have to ask to bring a girl back here." Richard smiled proudly; he enjoyed having Alan here so much. It was like having a part of Lucy back, but also allowed him to be a father he always wanted to be.

"Thanks" Alan looked up with a smile as he considered again how much he was enjoying being here with Richard. It had been a strange relationship for him to get used to, at first it appeared to be a business deal, but Richard really had nothing to do with the F1 team. He owned the company, but mainly Alan found his role was to supporting him. Alan at first wasn't used to this relationship full stop; having someone who lived with him without all out war was one first, but supporting his dreams was another. Richard was someone who played pool with him, trained with him, went drinking with him, but what's more, listened and cared about what he wanted.

"Now get in the shower while I fix you some breakfast." Richard got off the bed as Alan ended his thoughts; the billionaire had left the bedroom when his phone rang in his pocket.

"I'll meet you downstairs in ten minutes." Alan nodded as he got out of bed as the clock showed 9.00 am near his plasma. The whole room had been redecorated not twenty four hours after Alan had agreed to move in, despite objections by Alan that it wasn't necessary. The room was a deep blue with a massive bed, and an array of new technological gadgets were bought and placed in the room without Alan even asking. This also included two new cars, of which Alan was given no choice but to accept by Richard. The new car also came with appropriate private plates, one with F1 RAC3R, and the other SP33D.

As Alan padded into the kitchen with his slippers on he considered how generous Richard had been. He wasn't stupid, he had asked why the generosity however Richard had only stated he was like son he never had.

"That help?" Richard was still smirking as he poured a cup of tea; the British billionaire could see Alan was becoming more relaxed in treating this house as his new home.

"Yeah, I take it you mean the shower was what helped?" The young blond sat and stirred his drink, as Richard yet again held back a laugh.

"Of course." Alan rolled his eyes by that obvious lie, as Richard passed him a plate of toast, before giving him a more serious look.

"Alan listen I know your father would have gone mad at you for bringing that girl home, but remember this, I am not Jeff Tracy. You can bring home whoever you want and do anything you want; I just want you to be happy." Richard placed his arm on Alan's shoulder before he reached around and grabbed a slice of Alan's toast from behind the blond while he was distracted.

"HEY!" Alan wined jokingly as Richard moved to put on his coat.

"See you at dinner; call me if you need me on my direct line okay. Oh and make sure you pack everything you need the jet leaves at nine." The billionaire left as Alan picked up his cup, as the door open Alan heard Richard call him again.

"Bye son."

Alan considered what Rick had called him as he grabbed another slice of toast. It wasn't the first time Rick had called him son, and Alan had to admit he enjoyed Rick calling him it; but somehow it was that itself that sat uneasily with him.

Jeff Tracy was his father, but Alan had stopped calling him 'dad' a long time ago. After Gordon left for the WASPS, things only got worse in the Tracy household with only Alan and his father there. Alan recalled they were either arguing together, Jeff was yelling or Alan was avoiding his dad completely. Alan had spent no time with his father before Rachel died, and in the time after Jeff had been so busy with work his time with his sons had been reduced. This didn't affect the elder boys as much as they had school and activities, but Alan still needed looking after and Jeff was struggling with him. This wasn't helped by the fact that Alan had completely changed since Rachel's death, gone was the smiling happy boy, and replaced with a darker, distant child. Jeff had been forced to replace the nanny Alan had had since birth, with another, and Jeff knew Alan never forgave him for it. A collection of new nannies came after only two months since Rachel's death, but none could replace her or even cope with the role. One even landed Alan in hospital by not paying attention to him, and of the dozen that were hired none lasted more than a few weeks. Since Rachel's death Alan had been desperate to live with Rachel's parents, and so when he was eleven and a half Alan moved in with them for over a year.

Their death was caused by an avalanche on a skiing holiday with Alan, Alan had even pulled both from the snow and gone to get help, but it was to late. When Alan returned home to Jeff he had returned to being just as distant and miserable as when he left the year before. Alan seemed to rebel from that point and hated everything to do with his father. After being expelled from school and causing havoc everywhere he went, Jeff decided bordering school for the next few years seemed a good idea for Alan. Jeff only learnt later that this was the worse decision he could have made.

"Richard Barton" The black Aston Martin sped through the rain on route to the office building of Barton industries. Richard had relocated recently out of the city due to Alan living with him, and he was spending more time working outside of the headquarters in New York than ever. The day may have been miserable and the traffic heavy, but a smile spread across Richard's face as his assistant relayed a message.

"Let him in my office, I'll be there soon." As he hung up he knew that an old rivalry was being revisited, but this time he was going to win.

The young assistant shut the door behind the billionaire; the office in which he stood in was modern and bright, glass and metal was clearly key to the décor. As his eyes scanned the room a series of photo frames caught his notice, the expression on his face was of ache and delight. The photo of a woman with blond hair and blue eyes was a caption of reality from a happier time; he loved this woman so much. The photo next on the desk was taken more recently. The blond teenager looked happy and handsome; his resemblance to the woman in the first picture was unquestionable.

As he held both of the picture frames, anger conquered over the pain as the billionaire looked up at the open doorway to see Richard Barton.

"Where's Alan? And what the hell are you doing with my son?" Jeff bellowed as he slammed the pictures down on to Richards's desk before approaching him, the anger of the past months was expelled in Jeff's voice.

Richard kept his cool; he had expected and wanted this reaction, which was the reason why he had told his assistant to let Jeff into his office.

"Hello Jeff. How are you?" The outstretched hand, smile and calm demeanour wasn't taken as sincere by the Tracy CEO.

"I asked you a question. Where is my son?" The anger remained clear in his voice but Richard ignored it and moved to sit behind his desk admiring the picture of Alan as he did so.

"Alan's fine, thanks for asking. I just made him breakfast at home, my home that is." Jeff was utterly taken back by Richards's words and casual attitude.

"What?" Jeff looked dazed, and Richard smiled up at him.

"He's living with you?" Richard nodded.

"Alan's been through a lot lately. A 'father' abandoning his son and trashing his dreams tends to affect a kid." Richard tried to control his voice but anger seeped through every word.

"You know nothing about me and Alan." Jeff remembered so well why he hated this man, while Richard ignored his words.

"He looks so happy in this picture; you have seen Alan happy right?" Jeff scoffed at Richard's self-assurance and Richard smirked as he got back up and circled around the desk towards Jeff.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? And I want to know what you're doing with pictures of my wife and my son?"

Despite Jeff being older both men were similar in looks and stature, it wouldn't have been a surprise to anyone that one woman dated both men.

"This is a picture of a woman I loved…" Richard held up the picture so Jeff could see it again, but Jeff interrupted him mid sentence.

"Well it's a shame she didn't love you back isn't it!" If Jeff felt he had the upper hand between them at that moment, then he didn't think it for long.

"She may have married you Jeff, but she did love me. In the past I hated you for having her, but not in the past seven months; not now I have Alan in my life. Oh and unless you haven't noticed that's something you're missing right now." Richard spat sarcastically back.

Jeff stared again at the picture of Alan in disbelieve at what he was hearing, Alan had been with Barton for over seven months without him knowing.

Richard soon noticed Jeff's gazing at his picture and so explained the image further. "It was taken on his eighteenth birthday? I bought him an Aston Martin, he loved it. We went for a drive, a drink, we had fun. A bit like what a father and son should do." Jeff moved forward and grabbed Richards's jacket roughly; his Tracy temper conquering his patience.

"So that's it? You didn't get Lucy so you decide you want Alan instead. You get Alan to believe that you can make him a Formula one racing driver, spoil him with money and hope he will want you to be his dad?" Jeff pushed Richard back, releasing him from his grip and walked away to the other side of the room.

Richard straightened out his shirt and suit as he spoke with satisfaction.

"You're forgetting Jeff that I didn't decide that I wanted Alan, Alan decided he didn't want you."

Jeff Tracy turned back to face is ex colleague, his mind racing about the idea Alan was living with a man he hated so much.

"Alan didn't want to see you seven months ago Jeff, and he doesn't now. I offered him a contract in F1, but it was Alan who decided he wanted me to be close with him. Alan decided that he wanted to come and live with me and he decided he wanted my support, and not yours."

Jeff hid his emotions well at Richards's words but deep down they hit a nerve, especially coming from this man. If Alan was living and working with Richard Barton then he was in trouble. Richard walked over to his fellow businessman and smirked as he said.

"You drove Alan away when you wanted nothing to do with him after Lucy died. You abandoned Alan and he hates you for it, and thanks to you're inability to be a father to Alan, so would Lucy."

Those last words were whispered slowly with spite and pleasure seeping into every word. Jeff couldn't control himself as moved towards Richard again and punched him square in the face.

Richard smiled as he turned his head toward Jeff wiping the blood from his mouth. "Thanks Jeff, I will make sure I tell Alan about this over dinner."

"I will get my son away from you; I won't let you hurt this family again."

Jeff Tracy stormed out of his office, both anger and sadness pumped through his veins.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Hurt and Home Truths

Jeff Tracy slammed his keys down on to his office desk before swiftly moving to pour himself a brandy. It was not his first glass of the day; and now he was definitely regretting the two glasses he had before this one. Jeff Tracy was a man who grew up in the air force and in NASA; but despite a strong controlled exterior Jeff Tracy did care and love deeply for his family. However developing a multi national corporation taught Jeff about who you show you're cards to, and what things to keep to yourself. Since his wife's death Jeff Tracy had been very closed with his emotions. His military upbringing also didn't help him deal with the sadness and pain about his wife.

After a visit from Rachel's parents just after their daughter death Alan begged him to let him to go live with them. Rachel's parents, Monica and Benjamin were overjoyed when Alan wanted to live with them. Alan and Rachel were regular visitors at their home before Rachel's death, and they deeply missed both of them. Jeff Tracy had not been sure this was a good idea at first. Alan was not happy at home, but he still wanted to try and make a better relationship with his son. Jeff had tried with Alan, but at the moment Alan still needed someone to keep an eye on him, and Jeff hadn't the time. Alan was getting bored and miserable and was constantly picking a fight, seeing Alan with Rachel's parents Jeff saw I completely different Alan, so he let Alan go stay with them.

Jeff walked over to this bookshelf and pull out his photo file, as he scanned through the photos of his family he considered the problems he had had with Alan when he was younger. Alan just seemed to have a knack of doing the stupidest things at the wrong times, and trouble followed his son everywhere. At boarding school he was always in trouble, Jeff punished him by taking away his privileges but then he would only run away. Alan's expulsion was not surprising to him despite the anger he showed to Alan about his behaviour. However when no other private boarding schools wanted Alan he had to return home, but Jeff soon learnt his true relationship with Alan was disastrous at best. With his other boys Jeff had no trouble hugging or showing he cared for them, but by fourteen Alan wanted Jeff no where near him. Therefore Jeff struggled to show Alan the same affection as the others, and the past between them had become a steel wall that neither of them could breach.

As the eldest Tracy down the liquid the calls he had requested to Peter to make and patch though to his office came on his video link.

"Dad you okay? You look like hell." Gordon Tracy was not subtle; his happy positive nature made him outspoken and honest, often in opposition to Alan's nature Jeff thought.

"Thanks Gordon, I feel even better now." Jeff knew it was meant as a joke by the comedian of the family, but Jeff wasn't in the mood.

"Dad me and Virgil just saw the papers we will be in New York in two hours, don't worry about it. Have you seen Alan yet?" Scott spoke with irritation at his second youngest brother's comment and his youngest brothers actions.

"Alan? You found him?" John Tracy chirped in, John may have the same eye and hair colour as Alan, but that was where the similarities stopped. Especially as Jeff and John had an extremely close relationship: unlike his relationship with Alan.

"Oh yes I found him alright John."

"I found him at Richard Barton's house, in his own bedroom no less!" Jeff looked annoyed but beneath that he appeared hurt.

"What happened? Why didn't you bring him home?" Virgil queried.

"He's not a dog Virgil; I can't just drag him home, especially now he's eighteen." All the Tracy sons were surprised Jeff had left Alan were he was, this was Jeff Tracy after all.

Noticing the surprised looks on his children's faces he revealed more of his very brief encounter with Alan this lunchtime.

"I tried to get him home but…" Jeff paused guilty and looked at the glass in his hand before putting it down next to him.

"What happened dad?" John's soft caring voice made things better for a second for the billionaire.

"I saw Barton first in his office, and he was saying that Alan had chosen him over me, and…and he was talking about you're mom." Jeff noticed all of his sons looked more sombre by the mentioning of their mother; a long silence followed as all were lost in their thoughts.

"I punched him." Jeff broke the silence with his confession and Scott laughed, and Virgil smirked.

"Nice one dad. I have no doubt he deserved it." Scott may have been impressed by his father's actions but that didn't last long.

"So when did you see Alan?" Scott asked.

Jeff considered his next move; he didn't know whether to reveal this to all his sons before him or just to Scott and Virgil. Jeff decided the latter was best as the eldest two knew the most about his and Alan turbulent relationship.

"Boys can I just have a word with Scott and Virgil for a minute, you don't mind do you?" He directed this only to his two youngest boys before him.

"No, that's fine." Gordon and John both looked confused but left it at that.

"Bye dad, I'll call you tomorrow." John smiled as he signed off.

"See ya dad." Gordon chimed in too before cutting the link, despite having curiosity about what he was missing.

"What was that about?" Scott looked concerned; he met his father's eyes and saw something that disturbed him there.

"I just wanted you two to hear this from me first. When I got to Barton's house I just stormed in and started yelling Alan's name. I found him upstairs in his bedroom. You should have seen it, it looked like Alan had lived there for years he had model cars, his clothes, his things… I just snapped." Jeff's head hung a little and Scott noticed it instantly.

_Four hours earlier…_

"_Alan, Alan!" Jeff Tracy's yells echoed in the entrance to the house and up the stairway in front of him. The billionaire had just left Richard Barton's office and headed straight to find his son._

_The ex astronaut examined the large kitchen and open plan living room with no avail, but stopped when he saw a picture of this son. The image showed Alan dressed in his racing suit and in front of a formula one car. Jeff felt a hint of happiness by the smile on his son's face, however it faded to anger when he noticed Richard Barton's arm wrapped around Alan. A noise from above him broke the billionaire's thoughts as he dropped the image down on to the arm of the chair next to him._

"_Alan!" Jeff headed up the marble stairs examining the house as the stairs circled up towards the next floor._

_As his suitcase snapped shut and he lifted it to the ground from his bed Alan Tracy heard his name, but not from whom he expected to hear it from._

"_Alan." The blond pulled on his second sock before starting towards his bedroom door, he didn't make it before his father opened it._

_Jeff took in his son before him, and was amazed by how much he had grown, but the confused and shocked look on Alan's face said it all to Jeff._

"_Not expecting me I take it?" Jeff sounded angry, but the blond was still in shock at his presence._

"_Erm, no…How did you find me?" Alan asked, as he watched his father's eyes examine the bedroom he was in._

"_Richard Barton told me. What are you doing here Alan?" Alan realised just how angry his father was at that moment and he internally caved. _

"_Never mind, you can tell me that at home. Our home!" Jeff moved closer and gripped firmly the arm of his son and directed Alan back the way he had just came._

"_What are you doing?" Alan fought against his father's grip but had little choice when his father just held the other side of his as well._

"_I think that's a question I should be asking you Alan. You have been living here with Barton for the past seven months Alan, What the hell were you thinking? I was worried sick about you." Jeff's anger and frustration from the past months was released with intensity at his son._

"_Get your hands off me." Alan released himself from his father's grip, but Jeff only continued dragging him towards the open front door._

"_What I'm thinking is you need to leave, but I'm staying." Jeff was taken aback by the attitude Alan showed and the anger he was portraying himself. _

"_Like hell you are Alan!" Jeff moved closer to his son and yet again snatched his arm and dragged him outside of the house._

"_What part of get the hell off me didn't you get?" Alan yelled, which was met by a frustrated look on Jeff Tracy's face._

"_Alan grow up! You are not staying here with him. You have no idea what that man has done to this family, and there is no way he is getting his hand on my son." Jeff yelled angrily as Richard pulled up in his car._

"_Jeff get off him." Alan looked at his boss, he knew him being here would only make his father worse._

"_Don't you dare tell me what to do with my own son." Jeff argued in the direction from where Richard was approaching them._

"_Rick leave it. He's just going." Alan looked across to his father who was standing next to him and indicted him to do as he requested._

"_Why not Jeff? You told Lucy what to do with Alan, and correct me if I'm wrong but that was have an abortion right?" Jeff Tracy looked with pure hatred at the man before him and what he had just said, he moved swiftly in his direction however forgetting his grip on his son._

"_You son of a…"Jeff started but Richard interrupted him as he noticed Alan slip off the steps unbalanced by Jeff's movement, the elder billionaire looked back with regret at his son._

"_Alan!" The blond teenager lifted his arm and rubbed his head scanning where he had impacted the ground, before looking at his father with distrust and anger. Jeff moved quickly to reach out and help his son to his feet.. _

"_Don't even try and touch me!" Jeff's anger in his voice had faded but Alan's seemed only to have intensified._

"_I'm sorry. Alan it was an accident, I didn't mean…" Jeff explained while Richard considered that Alan expression showed that he had heard this before from Jeff._

"_Just get out." It was spoken slowly and with bitterness, and the look in his son's eyes showed Jeff how much his son meant those words._

_Present hour…_

"I know I shouldn't have been so rash, and I should have spoken to him first but the way he looked at me when he saw me, he wanted nothing to do with me."

"Dad don't worry about it. Alan ran away you're allowed to be mad at him when you finally find him." Virgil spoke to reassure Jeff but was still uncertain about the source of his father's negative mood.

Jeff stared at his eldest son; Scott had noticed the brandy glass and also the hour of the day in New York but he knew his father's explanation and apology was sincere.

"Is he okay?"

Scott tone had a hint of uncertainty, as he knew something his brothers didn't. Jeff Tracy had not the time, nature or lifestyle to spend hours drinking, but on the anniversary of his wife's death or on a few other occasions he often tried to forget his pain with alcohol. On his mother's last birthday Jeff had given up drinking altogether after making a terrible mistake.

"He's fine I think, just a cut on his head. I tried to apologize and explain, but he just told me to leave over and over again." Jeff looked crushed by that thought alone.

Virgil Tracy looked uncomfortable; he had never seen their father violent or imagined he could be. Despite this being an accident, Jeff Tracy looked deeply sorry. However Scott Tracy was more concerned that the rift between his father and youngest brother was soon to be unfixable.

"Dad, Virgil and I will go and see Alan." Jeff tried to cut in to convey his worries about that idea.

"Dad he needs to see us, maybe we can talk some sense into him." Jeff gave in and nodded.

"We will come and see you after we see Alan and tell you how it went." Virgil looked at his father who looked tired and stressed.

Both Scott and Virgil Tracy knew of their father's unpleasant relationship with Richard Barton. They had met him a few times when their mother was alive, and every time it had resulted in an argument between their parents. The exact reasons behind there dislike for each other were not clear to the eldest sons but both felt it was related to their mother.

"Alight; let's see if he will listen to you rather than me. Bye boys." As the eldest boys signed off, Jeff sat for a moment in silence before looking up and re-called his red haired son.

"Oh! Hey dad."

Gordon Tracy was reasonably close to his father, especially since Gordon had been in an accident and his ability to walk again had been questioned. Jeff had been there for every minute his son needed him, and Gordon had been very grateful for that.

"Gordon." It was a serious, deep and definitely menacing tone that the second youngest Tracy heard in his father's voice.

"Yes dad?" Gordon had the ability to make anyone laugh, and he was always playing jokes and tricks, Jeff was reminded of Lucy's laughter every time Gordon was around.

However Gordon's cheery voice didn't help him this time and Jeff saw straight through it.

"How long have you known Gordon?" Jeff looked annoyed.

"Dad I promise I only heard from Alan last night. He didn't even mention Barton or say where he was." Jeff rolled his eyes at his son, and considered if this was the truth. The youngest two were close, but Alan trusted his brother less now after Gordon had revealed where Alan was the last time he had run away.

"Gordon!"

"Dad, I didn't know where he was. Honest." The red head looked innocent and his words were emotional.

"Alright Gordon, I believe you." Jeff mellowed at his son. Unlike Alan, Gordon had a resemblance of himself in looks. In the past year and a half the now 23 year old year old had been through so much with his accident. Jeff had been so proud of his Gold medal winning son in the Olympics and then terrified for his future after his accident, but now all healed the boy looked as cheeky as every. Gordon as so knew his father well and so knew what his father was about to ask him to do.

"Dad…I can't." Gordon shook his head at being placed in this position. His baby brother and he were close when having fun and playing games, but Alan still tended to cut him off about his real feelings or his problems.

"Gordon, I wasn't asking, I'm telling. Give me Alan's phone number." Excluding Alan, Jeff rarely shouted any more at his boys. Although trying to bring up five young boys did mean he had shouted at them in the past, a lot.

"Okay, but he's not going to be happy about this." Gordon backed down; he knew Jeff would only find another way of getting Alan's number if he didn't give it him.

Jeff noted down the number as Gordon considered his next words.

"Dad if you just give him some time I'm sure Alan will call you. He's headstrong, stubborn and determined, but if you force him home he won't stay there." Gordon's comments made the eldest Tracy look up at his red hair son in disagreement.

"Gordon. Alan is eighteen and needs to go to college, this dream of racing cars can wait."

"Dad are you really concerned about Alan's career, or Alan's new boss?" Gordon knew very little about the British billionaire apart from what was public knowledge. However from hearing his father's angry words, and his eldest brothers talking, he knew something had gone on between Barton and his dad.

"Gordon, Alan is going down a dangerous road. Barton is trouble; he is trying to get to me by using Alan. I don't want Alan near him." Jeff knew that Gordon wasn't fully aware of what was happening, but knew his son maybe a way to get the message through to Alan.

"Okay." Gordon was a bit surprised that Jeff felt so determined that Alan was in a dangerous situation.

"Bye dad, I'll see you soon." Gordon smiled at his father, and Jeff returned the gesture.

"Bye son, and be careful." Jeff sat back as stared at the number on his note pad before he reached for the phone.

Scott Tracy swore as the traffic ahead of him slowed again, he was following Virgil's directions while he drove the silver Porsche to Richard Barton's home. Ironically it wasn't far from the Tracy residence. Virgil Tracy's brown eyes scanned his elder brother and he considered Scott's mood. Scott Tracy was so much like their father. So much so that Scott had followed Jeff's lead by going into the air force and becoming a top pilot. Virgil himself had his interests more based on his mother's ambitions; he was the artist and musician of the family. Despite that Virgil, like all the Tracy's boys had learnt to fly jets since being young. His path though was more the engineering side of aircrafts, what they could do, rather than flying them. Virgil was the laid backed but passionate Tracy; he always listened and was best known as the peacekeeper of the family. However he knew Scott better than Scott knew himself, they couldn't have been closer, and so he knew instantly that Scott was troubled.

"Okay, spill it." Scott took his eyes of the road to look at his younger brother. Virgil looked out of place in his Hawaiian style shirt and tanned skin, as the New York state rain fell on the windscreen.

"What?" Scott was known to be direct and always in control, so the voice was stern and slightly annoyed. The air force routine and being the eldest of five children, one of which he had near enough raised, had made him guarded about his emotions and thoughts.

"What is it you know that I don't? You have been looking pissed off since dad called on the jet." Virgil knew something that gotten to Scott.

"Why do you think? Alan stormed off for over half a year and he was with Richard Barton! You know what trouble he caused with mom and dad Virgil, so why do think that I'm pissed?" Scott yelled, as he slammed his fists of the steering wheel and looked with disbelief at his brother who was holding his hands up to calm him.

"Hey, stop yelling and just calm down. I know what dad thinks of Barton, and I know your angry at Alan but if you go in there yelling like dad did he isn't going to want to talk to you either." Virgil raised his voice slightly, which acted to calm his elder brother down slightly.

"I know." Scott looked troubled as he moved his head back to meet the headrest, and looked thoughtful.

"And?" Virgil knew there was more, Scott like his dad often exchanged worry with anger. Getting him to talk about it was key to unlocking what was bothering Scott.

Scott stared at his brother.

"I hate it that you know me that well." Scott turned his attention back to the traffic and continued to drive, as Virgil waited patiently knowing that Scott would crack soon.

As Scott pulled up at the gates before the house he stopped the car and tilted his head across in his brother's direction.

"I'm supposed to be there for him Virgil, and he didn't tell me where he was, he didn't come to me. After everything I said to him, all the times he and dad argued afterwards I always told him he could come to me anytime about anything. He didn't Virgil, he went to Barton instead!"

A stranger wouldn't have noticed, but Virgil saw the hurt in his brother's eyes. Scott worshipped Alan; he was more than a brother to him.

"I know this is hard to take, but you have been there for Alan so much in the past Scott don't forget that." Virgil paused not fully sure if that was everything bothering Scott. He got his answer when Scott twisted his torso to face him.

"What if he doesn't want to see me Virgil?" Virgil frowned, and realised how much this was bothering his brother.

"What? Why wouldn't he want to see you?" Scott didn't meet his eye.

"I let him down." The emotion of regret was clear.

"Scott! No you didn't!" Virgil had a puzzled tone to his voice and held his hand out to his brother's shoulder.

"I did Virgil!" Scott looked back at him; his face showed signs of an agonizing worry.

"I didn't believe what he said, and I stuck up too much for dad and not enough for Alan." Scott glanced at his brother and saw confusion, and Scott knew he couldn't leave it there; Virgil would want to know more.

"About ten months ago Alan called me, it was two in the morning and I was at the base, he said that he and dad had been arguing for hours. I later found out that dad had been drinking, and that Alan had been taking offence at dad not letting him take part in a race." Virgil sat quietly as his brother continued.

"Alan said the wrong thing at the wrong time and…dad hit him." Virgil knew that wasn't the end of the tale, but could help but question that idea.

"Scott come on. Dad gets angry at Alan but he would never hit any of us. We never even got smacked." The disbelief was clear on his face and in his voice.

"I know, I know. My reaction was the same, and it shouldn't have been. Alan had called me on his cell phone; god knows where he was. I said the same thing; I yelled and blamed him and I said some terrible things to him. I shouldn't have Virgil, I should have believed him, but I didn't. Only later in the week did I see his split lip were dad's wedding ring had caught him." Scott looked at his brother who was still indecisive to believe the new information about their father.

"I told Alan that night to grow up and stop lying about dad, and that we were all getting fed up of him behaving like this." Virgil then understood Scott's unease.

"When I called dad in the morning he was a mess. I have never seen him so sorry or ashamed. From that day he has never had more than one drink at any time, and is even more closed about mom now than ever. Alan hasn't forgiven dad or forgiven me for the events that night. I let him down when he came to me for help. So this time he didn't turn to me, he turned to Barton instead. Now he is so far from us I don't know if we will ever get him back Virgil." The regret was clear in his brother's face and voice.

"Scott, dad made the mistake that night not you. Alan doesn't hate you and he never will. You're like a father to him but you're going to have to except that you can't fix everything between Alan and dad yourself." Virgil paused, Alan may have never had a mother, but he sure as hell had two fathers.

"What about today Virgil? It will be worse now than ever." Virgil understood why Scott was so worried about the state of Alan and his father's relationship after hearing his story and the day's events with his father and brother.

"When I saw dad's brandy glass I knew something had happened between them." Virgil moved his head forward towards the dashboard of Scott's car to try and get a glimpse of his brother's face.

"It was an accident Scott." Virgil stated firmly. Scott turned to meet his brother.

"I know, but that doesn't change how Alan is going to take it. Also how the hell dad and Alan are going to bridge the gap between them with Barton around I don't know. If Alan continues with Barton then he is going to be the wedge between dad and Alan. Alan's going to end up slipping away from us, but I can't let that happen Virgil." Scott finished as he put his foot on the gas.

Talking with Virgil in the car had served to cool him down and to lessen the burden of his troubles, the eldest Tracy son decided. However he knew this talk would still be difficult, but he wanted Alan away from Barton and back where he belonged. Alan was stubborn though, and Scott knew that Alan firmly believed everyone of his brothers supported his father, and therefore were against him. Scott had been Alan's last hope of some source of support in the family, and relied on him often. That had changed though after the late night phone call ten months ago, Alan had rarely wanted to speak to his brother even before he left home.

Alan grabbed his luggage from his room and headed for the kitchen, as he dropped his bags on the marble floors his phone rang. After a short conversation he again picked up his bags and headed for the door. He decided after today's events to leave earlier and so had agreed to meet Richard at the airport; he reached for his keys to his Mercedes as he opened the door.

Scott Tracy slammed the door to his Porsche and looked over to his brother. Despite his conversation with Virgil, seeing where Alan was staying and more relevant with whom, made him mad again. Virgil encouraged Scott towards the door, but just as he reached for the doorbell their youngest brother opened the door.

"Alan." Scott said it with relief, somehow seeing his brother guaranteed Alan was safe and Scott felt better for that knowledge, but only for a matter of seconds.

As the baby of the family stood there looking back and forth between his brothers he looked more than slightly shocked at their arrival. However Scott only noticed the luggage in his hands, and stupidly opened his mouth.

"What the hell is this? If you think for a second you're running away again Alan, think again." Scott's voice was angry and his face matched it, as Alan just shook his head at him.

"I should have guessed you two wouldn't be far behind after dad little visit." Alan spoke with disbelief at his brother's words. The blond attempted to push past his eldest brother to reach his car but was stopped by Scott's hand on his arm.

Unlike his two brothers in front of him, Virgil tended to think before he spoke. He also had a sense of knowing when a dangerous situation brewing; and this was one of those occasions.

"Get the hell off me Scott." Alan's tone was firm and he was clearly irritated by Scott's actions, as he attempted to break free of his brother's unyielding grip.

"I will get off you, when you come home!" Scott knew he was going about this all wrong. He could also sense Virgil's annoyance that he had gone in at the deep end with Alan, despite his promise not too.

"Scott let go of him." The eldest turned at his younger brother's words and he showed him a look questioning asking whose side he was on. Virgil's however ignored his eldest brother, as Scott let go of his grip on Alan.

"Alan listen." Virgil moved from his elder brother's side to a position in front of his baby brother, he put his hand on Alan's shoulder but with less force than Scott had. Alan held his head up but slightly to the side, not meeting his brother's eyes.

"We just want five minutes just to talk to you." Virgil then took in Alan appearance; the young man looked taller, fitter and older than last time he had seen him. Like him Alan had a taste for designer fashion, and so was dressed appropriately in a designer leather jacket and jeans. When Alan had spent time with Virgil recently he had often objected to the idea that Virgil himself had any fashion taste at all. With his love for colour and patterns, Virgil often had an interesting choice of clothing on.

"I don't want to hear it Virgil, just stay away from me." Alan was harsh and blunt with his response, and Virgil was taken aback by his tone. The youngest tried to pull away, but Virgil held his shoulder still as he noticed a large bruise and a cut on his brother's head. Both Scott and Virgil glanced at each other after seeing their brother's injury; Scott looked away fast his guilt resurfacing.

"Have you put some ice on that?" Virgil sounded caring, and Alan mellowed a little when he looked into Virgil's brown eyes and saw his concern.

"I did a couple of hours ago. I'm fine, honestly." Alan sighed in exhaustion and unconsciously rubbed the other side of his head with his unoccupied hand; both brothers noticed and again shared a glance.

"Please Alan. Just five minutes, no lectures, no yelling and we will even leave when you want us too, I promise." Alan caved under Virgil's words, he hadn't spent a lot of time with Virgil in the past year, and at the moment Virgil sounded genuine.

"Fine! You get five minutes, but I'm not going home." Alan turned to re open the red door as the rain began to fall once again.

Scott Tracy noted the picture of his mother and a separation one of Alan as they entered one of the living rooms, but swallowed his aggravation. Alan landed himself on one of the black leather couches, while he pointed Virgil in the direction of the kitchen. Scott Tracy sat across from his baby brother on another sofa. The room he noticed was modern, well lit and contained expensive items, a really bachelor pad he considered. He looked at his baby brother for a few seconds before Alan finally met his eye.

"What?" Alan stated crossly, Scott looked like he was going to 'play dad' with him.

"Why didn't you call? Alan we were worried, I was worried, you could have been hurt or dead for all we knew." Scott spoke slowly but passionately, he sat on the end of the couch looking disturbed at the concept of losing Alan. While he desperately trying to reason with the boy about his actions.

"Oh, you mean like last time I called you, and you said I was lying." Alan stared at his eldest brother, hurt and anger lined his words. Alan felt a slight hint of regret at saying those words when his eldest brother looked deeply remorseful about his actions.

"I'm sorry." Scott looked up at his baby brother, as blue eyes met blue eyes Alan felt guilty for again blaming Scott, but tried to hide it as Virgil appeared.

"Right, put this to your head it will take the swelling down" Virgil placed the ice pack in his brother's hands, Alan moved in to a defensive mind set as Virgil sat down.

"I take it as you're here dad explained this." Alan indicated the bump on his head.

"He told us about it." Virgil said quietly.

"He didn't mean it Alan, he said he just let go of you and you slipped." Scott spoke but deeply concentrated on Alan's demeanour to see if that was indeed the truth.

"I know he didn't mean it. Dad seems to prefer to smack me one when he means it." Despite his earlier guilt, the words were aimed at Scott, who again looked uneasy.

"That was a joke Scott." Alan voice was laced with bitterness and sarcasm.

Virgil got up and moved closer to the blond, desperately trying to steer off that path of conversation as he sensed Scott getting annoyed again.

"Anyway kid, where you off too?" Alan rolled his eyes at the terminology Virgil used, while Virgil scuffed up his hair and smiled in a desperate bid to get Alan to relax.

"Australia." Scott's head shot up and stared at Alan, but before he had gotten any words out Virgil interrupted purposely to stop Scott yelling.

"For the race?" Virgil hoped.

"Yes, for the race! I'm a driver now, thanks for the support, and accusation that I was running away again." Alan shrugged off Virgil, and glared at Scott as he put down the ice pack on to the glass coffee table.

"I'm looking forward to watching you on TV." That made both his brother's look at him; while Alan looked surprised, Scott seemed to be questioning his sanity.

"You're going to be watching?" Alan enquired.

"Alan listen, racing is fine for now, but Barton isn't! Alan you don't know him, but suddenly you're living and working for him." Virgil caved internally, Scott had blown it.

"What! This is why you're here isn't it? Did dad send you to do his dirty work?" Alan rose from the sofa and snatched his bags.

Before Virgil could try again to attempt to calm Alan down, Scott got in first.

"Were here because you have no idea what you're doing Alan. Barton is using you to get to dad, nothing more." Scott yelled and followed his youngest brother.

"Thank you Scott for the little reminder of why I left home."

"Also thanks for assuming that I am so terrible that Richard want something other than me out of our relationship. You don't know him, okay. He has been great to me, unlike some people. So if you're just going to stand there and repeat dad's words you can get out." Alan headed for the door and his brothers followed him.

"Great Scott, you just couldn't shut up could you." Virgil whispered as Scott shrugged off his brother's words and walked faster after Alan.

Alan was loading his luggage into the Mercedes as both brothers approached him; unfortunately this was the moment Scott spotted the licence plate on the car.

"So you mean he has been great to you by giving you expensive cars, and clothes?" Scott circled around the car as he glanced at Alan menacingly, why Virgil sighed internally and tried to hold Scott back.

"No" Alan slammed the door and approached his eldest brother angrily.

"He actually bothered to listen to what I wanted for a change and supported me unlike you, who stabbed me in the back."

Before Scott could return the comment Alan headed for the drivers seat.

"Wait Alan, don't go please we need to talk about this. Why don't you call us after the race and we can talk more." The diplomacy that Virgil attempted failed dramatically.

"Yeah, sure Virgil. I'll really look forward to having another lecture like this." Alan had always been a fan of sarcasm.

"Bye Virgil."

Virgil had expected a hug, but his goodbye from Alan compared significantly better than Scott's, as Alan just ignored his presence.

As Alan started the engine Scott approached the car, but his brother held him back. As Alan sped off the look Scott gave Virgil stated his annoyance at him.

"What the hell did do you that for?" Scott pulled Virgil off him and headed for the car.

"What? I could ask you the same thing Scott." Virgil raised his voice and also approached the car.

"I was trying to get him home! You were encouraging him to stay here!" Scott slammed his driver door.

"I was being supportive and not critical." Virgil glanced at Scott as he reached for his seatbelt.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Virgil sighed; Scott was pent up with rage.

"Alan needs to decide what to do on his own, but with all the evidence about Barton." Scott considered if Virgil had lost his mind.

"Are you crazy? Richard Barton is going to turn dad and us into the devil in Alan's eyes, while making himself into Alan hero." Scott started the car and sped off just as Alan had before.

"You're scared of losing him, aren't you?" Scott made no attempt to take his eyes off the road or answer the question posed.

"Alan maybe mad at you now, but you're not going to fall in his estimations Scott, Alan worships you. That's why he is mad at you. It's dad you should be worried about, at the minute Alan doesn't even care enough to argue with him, he just won't speak to him." Scott considered his brother's words, why did Virgil always have to be right?

"I just can't lose him Virgil; and I miss him. I'm trying to be there for him, but I don't want Barton influencing him, he and dad have enough problems." Scott spoke after a long pause while he began to calm down. He knew he had screwed that up with Alan, but the idea of Alan being turned against him made him really angry.

"Scott, I know Alan says this a lot to you but listen, you're not his dad. You're his brother and sometimes you tend to preach more than listen." Virgil continued before Scott yelled back that he was wrong.

"You know I'm right, so just don't bother retaliating". Virgil pushed the issue, as his brother's face looked shocked at the concept.

"Next time why not try telling him that you miss him." Virgil soften his voice, as Scott again looked troubled by the past hours events.

Alan Tracy boarded the private jet and slammed the fridge door shut after getting a beer. His emotions and thoughts meant he didn't notice Richard Barton coming down the aisle of the jet towards him.

"Careful you'll end up knocking holes in the plane." Richard trailed off and his smiled disappeared as he took in Alan head injury.

"I'm going to kill Jeff for that." Fury covered the face of Richard Barton again, he looked no less angry at seeing Alan's injury then he had been after Jeff had left this afternoon.

"I can't believe that you let him just leave after giving you that. I'm struggled against the urge to beat the hell of him."

"He didn't mean it." Alan looked in his boss eyes, Richard was really fuming, he didn't care if he meant it or not.

"Trust me it will annoy Jeff more to know you're with me than if you stay here trying to pick a fight with him." Alan had had enough, and there was a determined aspect of revenge in his voice.

"I just want to get out of here." The young blond sat down and opened his beer, after taking a large mouthful he sat back and sighed.

Richard considered Alan's words and behaviour. The kid looked emotionally shattered, but what's more he agreed with Alan, he could get revenge later.

"Alright, I'll leave Jeff for now, but if he tries to get in contact with you put him on to me. This isn't over though; he is going to pay for hurting you." Richard sat down next to Alan and put his arm around his shoulder, anger still pumped through his veins but he tried to lighten the mood a little.

"I fell victim to his right hook as well today." Richard had more of a joking tone to his voice.

Alan laughed and Richard faked a hurt puppy look.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to laugh. I kind of bet he enjoyed that." Alan sat up and smiled as he drained the bottle.

"Yeah, but don't worry, he's only jealous. I'm not like him Alan, I'm not going to turn my back on you, and I would never abandon my son." Alan considered Richard's words, but missed the dark demonising threat in them as he got up and returned again to the fridge.

"I know. Thanks for sticking up for me too. I can see why my mom liked you." Alan smiled as he stood over his boss before he passed Rick a beer.

"To new beginnings." Richard smiled as he toasted Alan.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Envy and Angry Encounters

Jeff Tracy was fed up; he sat in the front room of the Tracy residence watching a post race press conference from the Monaco Grand Prix. Of the six races now completed Alan had won three, and his lowest position so far was only fourth. It had been three months since he had found out were Alan was and despite a visit from his two eldest brothers Alan had still not called his dad. Of course Jeff had rang and sent messages to Alan frequently, but he was either rewarded by Alan's voicemail, or Richard Barton. It had taken Jeff not two minutes after his eldest sons had returned from seeing Alan to say he was flying to Australia. However he had been finally convinced that seeing Alan again at the moment would do him no good by both Virgil and Scott, but mostly by Virgil. Jeff had been convinced to leave his son for a while longer by Scott's suggestion that if Alan wasn't successful at F1 he would be forced home anyway. However he only agreed to give Alan a few more weeks if Virgil kept in contact with him. Jeff had at least had the comfort that Alan was still replying to texts from both Virgil and Gordon, and he hoped that they could convince Alan to speak to him. Jeff sat and considered his next move, the idea Alan wouldn't be successful and return home was definitely out of the window. Enough was enough; he was going to see Alan. As Jeff began to get up as Peter came into the room.

"Hello Jeff, I wasn't disturbing you was I?" The young man was still staying with Jeff for the time being despite it being for a longer length of time than Jeff had intended.

"No of course you weren't, I was just thinking. Please come in Peter." Jeff hid is frustration about Alan's situation well as he turned the TV off and Alan's face disappeared.

Peter Hemmings had truly enjoyed spending his time with Jeff both personally and professionally. Even having the two eldest Tracy sons' visit more frequently lately, if anything had aided in fulfilling his future with Jeff.

"Thanks" Peter sat down in one of the large leather chairs, the room was cosy but made more homely by having pictures of Jeff's boys placed around the room.

"Peter I have told you before, you can relax a bit." Jeff Tracy sensed the boy's nervousness; he assumed that as Peter had been brought up in a care home that he just hadn't settled in this environment yet.

"Can I get you something to eat Jeff?" Peter enquired as the elder man got up.

"No thank you Peter. I am just going to ring Scott and then I may have to go overseas for a few days." Jeff smiled at the young man, and headed for his study.

Peter sat for a minute. He would never consider himself a cruel or deceiving person, but life had dealt him an unfortunate hand. So when Peter found himself staying with a billionaire he had decided to take advantage of the situation. Over time Peter had begun to respect and care for his boss, Jeff to him was the father figure he never had. As he came more and more attached to Jeff Tracy, his desire to stay part of this family grew, as did his need to want the best for Jeff Tracy. He had learnt many skills over the years in care especially from 'Brains', Jeff Tracy's new engineer, and events in his life had taught him to know that information was the key to success. Therefore for months Peter had been hearing Jeff's private conversations as Peter had placed relaying chips in Jeff Tracy's video and cell phones. The information he had learnt had been very informative. Peter smiled before swiftly exiting the room and went upstairs.

Jeff closed the door before moving to sit at his desk, he then pressed number one on his video phone, the code to call Scott.

"Hey dad." Scott answered chirpily; he had expected his father to call soon, as they had just watched Alan race too.

"Hello son, everything okay?" Jeff smiled as he saw the sandy beaches and blissful weather in the background behind his eldest.

"Yep, all going according to plan, and having Brains here is helping greatly. Were really making progress dad, test flights can't be far off." Jeff was very pleased and proud of everything his eldest sons were doing. The three of them had been pushing so hard recently to make Jeff's dream up and running as soon as possible. It had also been a great distraction from Alan.

"Okay son, just watch what you're saying on open channels. To be a success this must be a secret." Jeff stressed this point, but not harshly.

"Sorry dad, we'll have to get used to that." Scott hesitated for a minute before continuing.

"So I take it you saw Alan on TV?" Scott knew the answer.

"I'm going to go and see him." It was a blunt and firm response.

"Dad."

"No Scott it's been to long." Jeff again spoke with resolve.

"Okay fine go and see him, just go tomorrow morning okay, not now." Scott knew his father had been influenced enough and no amount of talking could convince him to stay away now.

"I have a meeting tomorrow morning about the program anyway, so it won't be until tomorrow night before I leave." Jeff's plans convinced Scott that his father had at least thought this through.

"I will speak to you on the plane tomorrow Scott. Tell Brains not to work too hard and tell Virgil to keep out of the sun, and the refrigerator!"

"Dad I'm only one man. You're asking the impossible! It would be easier to build a secret hideout and a space ship than keep Virgil from the food." Jeff laughed, and Scott was pleased to see his father happy if only for a moment.

"Bye son." Jeff was still smiling at the thought as the image of paradise vanished, and he was left alone again in his dark study.

Peter quickly shut the feed in case Jeff heard the delayed record of his conversation; he was sat in the top room in the house which had been Alan's before he left. The room was suitable in size and lit by large windows placed in the roof, and as it was in the loft space it had a fantastic view. When Jeff had first shown Peter Alan's bedroom Peter had noted the sadden tone in his voice.

Only when the billionaire was showing the room to Peter did he noticed how un-personalised Alan's room actually was. Apart from a single wooden bed, a desk and a wardrobe, the room lacked Alan's character and that saddened him. This however was a positive for Peter and any personal items Alan had left were quickly gathered up by him and hidden away in a box. Peter quickly decided to have an impact of his own on this room, he added books on science and history, and a chess board and telescope soon appeared after Peter met John. He also found one very interesting object in Alan's things that would be very valuable in his plans.

"Peter." The tap at the door and his name knocked Peter from thoughts, but luckily he had already shut down the computer.

"Come in." Peter smiled as Jeff entered.

"I'm going to do some more work in my room and then get some sleep. Peter I was wondering if you could stay in the office tomorrow while I'm at my meeting." Jeff tried not to make to Peter ask too many questions about these secret meetings of which he attended alone.

"Of course, that's no problem. Good night Jeff." Peter nodded his head as Jeff Tracy eyed up the telescope in his room. Jeff paused for a minute to take in the room before leaving to go back downstairs.

Peter considered Jeff's words; he needed to find out about this project. Jeff spoke daily about this project to his son's and Peter decided he needed to know whether these private meetings were also related to this. Peter considered Jeff's action and behaviour when he scanned the room; he was now certain if Alan was to return he would have to leave. Peter had developed a strong distaste for the youngest Tracy now for months. How a son could abandon his father? Especially when he was as kind as Jeff, every time he thought this it made his blood boil. Alan had a perfect family life in Peter's mind and he had thrown it away, and it was making Jeff unhappy. If the youngest Tracy didn't want his place in this family, Peter decided he was definitely willing to replace him.

Alan Tracy awoke to the rising sun enlightening the private jet in a brilliant yellow as it soared over the Atlantic. He decided he must have fell asleep just as the plane took off, however that wasn't surprising really as the work load for him was intense lately. From training in the gym twice a day, to interviews with the press, never mind actually practise and racing, the last months had been draining for the blond. He was flying back to New York state for a bit before continuing en-route to the Parola sands race track in California. Parola Sands had great memories for Alan. Rachel had taken him there one year on vacation and he had promised her one day he was going to win there for her. Alan had liked the quite area and scenery so much around the track that he had decided to relocate and buy a house not far away. He had only seen pictures of the house before purchasing it, and despite Richard being determined that he was buying it for Alan; Alan had not given in and paid in full for the property himself.

"Mr Tracy" Alan looked up and hoped he hadn't been snoring or drooling as a very attractive blond young woman was staring at him.

"Yeah, that's me… but called me Alan." To him Mr Tracy was his dad, he was Alan.

"Sorry…Alan." She smile was cute Alan decided; it made her face, that was framed by blonde waves glow.

"Richard Barton rang to say he has been called to London for two days but he'll meet you in Los Angeles. I said you were sleeping and he thought it was best not to wake you." She seemed to smile more at that thought, as she placed some items on the table before him. Alan dipped his head and looked a little embarrassed that she had seen him asleep.

"I brought you the US and British papers." She smiled again but as she turned to head back down the jet Alan spoke quickly.

"Do you want a drink Juliet?" Alan indicted to the chair across from him as he read her name tag. He had recognised her from other flights with Richard, as Richard had only two air stewardesses that flew on his two private jets.

"Okay that would be nice, would you like an orange juice?"

Juliet turned to the fridge after Alan had nodded in agreement but before she had a chance to sit down Alan's cell phone rang.

"I will come back when you have finished." She quickly spoke and had left before Alan had even found his phone. Alan's newly woken and dazed state meant he answered the phone before looking at his caller identity.

"Hello." Only when he heard the voice on the other end did he know he shouldn't have answered this call.

"Alan. It's John." Alan considered why John would be calling him for a moment. If two brothers could be more opposite than John and Alan, Alan would have dared someone to try and find them.

"Hey."

Alan couldn't think of what else to say. The last he had heard John was studying advanced space discovery and writing a book. He had completed the NASA astronaut program, and had even been up to the international space station. When John was at college Alan had been at boarding school, and by the time he was home John was at NASA. He saw John only for Christmas and other occasions but even then they had so little in common they spent barely any time together. So Alan's question still remained in his head, of why John was calling him?

"What are trying to achieve Alan?" Alan was taken aback by the directness and anger in his brother's voice. He had never seen John yell; when John was younger he often got upset about his mother, but cried rather than shouted.

"What?" Alan was confused and didn't expect this from the quietest member of the Tracy family.

"What are you trying to do to dad? Why are you doing this? Do you want to end up ruining his career and the Tracy name?" Okay, scratch that Alan thought now he had heard John shout and very loudly.

"John. I am just doing my own thing. I haven't even spoken to dad in months so how can I be ruining his career? What do you mean ruining his name?" Alan looked confused even though John couldn't see it, and but the elder blond still continued with the same irritation as before.

"The papers Alan. What did you do, decide to tell a few lies about dad to get you more publicity? I never thought you would stoop so low, were family Alan, and you're supposed to look out for family." John spoke so fast and passionately Alan couldn't get a word in.

"John I haven't told anyone anything about dad, never mind any lies. What are you talking about?"

"Just stop it Alan. Scott's fuming with you, Virgil and Gordon are fed up of you, and I can't believe I have you as a brother. Grow up Alan. If you're so desperate for some attention well congratulations now you have it. Dad is going to be so ashamed of you, and so would mom." As the line when dead Alan was filled with sadness and rage, but more dominantly guilt, that last bit had hurt.

Thinking about what this brother had said Alan noticed the papers before him; it didn't take long for him to find out why John was so angry. Alan stared at the headline in front of him and smirked, this was going to cause some trouble.

**Billionaire Tracy assaults his teenage son due to F1 career**

Jeff Tracy attacked his son for being an F1 racer, and has previously hit his son…

Alan finished the article and lowered the paper to his knee; Alan considered who knew about the incidents with his father. To his knowledge it was only him and his dad in detail. Alan picked up the phone to call the pilot; the next stop was now Tracy tower in New York. If Alan had told no one in detail about their confrontations this meant his father must have. There were images in the article taken from CCTV at Barton's home of Alan and his father, and an unidentified source for the information about Alan and Jeff's past was mentioned in the text. It was now Alan who couldn't wait to see his father, but as Juliet returned Alan soon found ways to relieve his annoyance and frustration.

As Alan pulled his car into the private car park under the building he was still fuming with emotions, Juliet had helped calm him down but now he had seen Tracy Tower his feelings had returned. Alan had changed at Richard's home and driven in to the city; the weather wasn't to cold in New York, but for someone who had spent months in hotter climates Alan thought it was. He hadn't planed to go elsewhere in this visit apart from Richard's home, as he wanted to avoid any media interest. He hadn't had journalists on his back yet, but it was still early in New York, and he wanted to speak to his father before commenting to the media. Alan took a deep breath as he took in the surrounding he pulled on his black leather jacket and straightened his jeans before locking his car.

As Alan took the lift to the main building he then considered what time zone he was in, and then became unsure if his father would be here yet. As Alan reached the top floor offices there seemed to be no one around apart from security downstairs, who had only let him through because he had showed them his passport for his name verification.

Jeff's office was dark and empty so Alan placed himself in his father's chair as his eyes examined the room, he soon saw the photo's of his family. There were two formal pictures, one of John in his astronaut attire, and one of Scott in his air force uniform. The next one was his three eldest brothers, his mother and a baby Gordon at Christmas before Alan was born. The final one consisted of all five boys and Jeff; this was the latest publicity photo for Tracy Corporation. As the youngest re examined the first two images, Alan regretted the resentment he felt. His father had supported his brothers so much over their career paths but not even cared about his.

The young man in the office caught his eye through the window, as he moved closer to the door; he recognised quickly the identity of the person in the room. The blond was looking at a series of photographs, and his face showed a sense of jealously and disappointment. As he stood in the doorway he began to examine Alan Tracy. He had seen images of the youngest before but he was mostly dressed in a driving suit. The blond had model looks; based on crystal blue eyes, tanned skin and styled blond hair. His build was similar to Scott Tracy's, slim but muscular, however he was probably not quite as tall as the eldest Tracy and had softer features facially. In appearance he showed no resemblance to Jeff Tracy, but his face and blue eyes were a clear link in heredity to Lucille Tracy. Peter Hemmings felt one thing, resentment. He had already become to hate the youngest due to his behaviour with Jeff and his abandonment of a perfect life, but seeing him only made things worse. It was time the youngest had a taste of his own medicine, Peter decided.

"Hello Alan." The blond looked up, but was surprised it wasn't his father he saw entering the room.

"Erm…Hi." Alan stuttered. The man in front of him was short and slender, with very short dark hair and thick glasses. The suit the stranger wore was definitely too big, but this didn't help Alan, as he had no clue who he was.

Peter smiled as he felt he had the upper hand.

"I'm Peter Hemmings." Alan looked no clearer to knowing Peter's identity but he nodded anyway.

"Your father's assistant" Alan half smiled in understanding.

"Your father has been kind enough to let me work with him here at Tracy Corp. I met your father at a meeting for ex foster care children, he has been really supported of me both personally and professionally." Peter chose his words with care to emphasise the importance.

"Yes. Virgil said something about an assistant." Alan internally groaned as he extended his hand out, he hadn't come here to listen to how great his father was, but something else was puzzling the blond.

"How did you know who I was?" The blond cocked his head as he remained seated in his father large chair.

"Well Jeff has been saying that you have been in some trouble lately, and that you would have to come back and see him soon." Alan mouth opened slightly and rage conquered his cerulean eyes but Peter continued.

"I thought who else would be here so early if they want didn't want to apologise and get Jeff's help." Peter noticed the offence Alan had taken to that remark, and Peter's tone was purposely positive and upbeat as he smiled nevertheless.

"I'm here for neither." Alan continued to sit in the chair but he spoke with annoyance is he stared with disbelief at the man before him.

"I'm sorry Alan I didn't mean to jump to conclusions. It's just with your father saying that you're young and so can be irresponsible and native at times, I just though that's why you're here, for your father's help." Alan stood up; he reacted more surprised that he thought he would be by hearing that his father had actually said these things about him.

"Oh did he?" Alan stood and turned away from Peter as he stared out at the skyline.

"Oh and the fact that I am living in the Tracy residence helps to know who you are, I saw one picture of you there." Not having met his man before Alan was unsure if this was what he was always like or if Alan had done something to offend him.

"You're living with Jeff." Alan purposely again edited 'dad' for 'Jeff' in his sentence. The surprise of the information however made the blond turn back to face Peter, as he did Peter clearly saw disappointment on his face.

"Yes. Jeff suggested I stay with him, I'm staying in your old room. I think Jeff didn't want to upset the other boys by putting me in their personal space, even though there not even home. Now you don't live there anymore it made sense really for me to live there instead." Peter tried not to look too overjoyed as he saw the youngest Tracy look overcome by this news; however Peter was enjoying being in control.

"Right well, I'm going to go find Jeff at his home. Nice to meet you." Alan started for the door, rage dominating his feelings.

"No, No I can't have that. Jeff just made a detour on the way to work he will be here soon for a meeting, trust me. He won't have long to speak with you though, he's busy." Peter sounded purposely patronizing, as he blocked the younger man's way.

"Yes. I am aware he's busy; he has been busy for eighteen years. Trust me!" Alan spoke with irony and irritation, as he met Peter's brown eyes. Alan returned to his father's chair as Peter exited the room and shut the door behind him.

Alan watched Peter walk towards the board room and out of site, and again decided to leave, if he was mad before he was unbelievable angry now. Alan picked up his keys from the desk but looked up suddenly when he heard a voice from the door.

Security downstairs at the tower had told Jeff his son was here, he was expecting him today, although surprised by the hour of the visit. Jeff Tracy walked in his office as he was shuffling through his mail, he didn't look up when he entered his room and just placed his briefcase on the cabinet near the door as he spoke.

"Hi John, you don't know how glad I am that you're here. Just give me a second and how about you and I have a quick breakfast together?" Jeff turned quickly by the voice he heard.

"Sorry to disappoint you, again, but it's not John." Alan returned to his defence mechanisms but his voice was neutral.

"Alan." Jeff at that second couldn't believe Alan was in his office, but also didn't know whether to be happy or angry now he was finally here.

Jeff approached his son with shock still covered his features, but then he stopped as he considered Alan's remark to him.

"Why would I be disappointed? I haven't seen you in months." Jeff stopped in the centre of the room; he noted Alan didn't look pleased to see him.

"You don't look thrilled to be here though." Jeff continued as he noted how much Alan reminded him of Lucy.

"I'm not." His voice was ruthless and demeanour was closed and uncaring.

"But you were expecting me right? You knew I would be here after you released this." Jeff was taken aback slightly by Alan's honest approach and disbelief that they were once again arguing, before noticing what Alan was holding.

Alan approached Jeff as he moved around the side of the desk with the newspaper. Jeff took if from his son and examined the article as Alan walked away from him, to sit on the opposite edge of Jeff's desk.

"What the hell?" Jeff stared amazed at the article.

"Alan, I didn't know anything about this?" Jeff looked up as Alan turned around looking annoyed.

"Well I didn't release it, and as far as I know you and I are the only people who know about it?" Alan raised his voice.

"You really think it was me who sold a story to the media about my own son?" Jeff spoke quietly but Alan showed no sign of uncertainty; his eyes were cold and unforgiving.

"Like I said I told nobody about your visit to Richard's house or what happen over a year ago, and this is what you wanted right, me here with you?" Jeff looked up with total disbelief on his face.

"Alan this is ridiculous. Why would I want this released? It isn't exactly my finest hour." Jeff voice conveyed shock and scepticism than anger.

"Well at least we agree on something, it wasn't your greatest idea to let go of me while I was standing on the end of a wet step." Alan got up as his father moved to sit in his chair behind the desk.

Jeff exhaled as he noted Alan's movement, which was anywhere as long as it was away from him.

"I didn't mean it Alan, it was an accident!" Jeff's voice got louder with each word.

"I don't care about that. Did you release this to get back at me for leaving?" Alan stared at his father; his blue eyes met his father's brown eyes.

"NO." Jeff said in amazement as he dropped the paper on to his desk before him.

"I didn't release this Alan. I only told Scott and Virgil, and they're not likely to go to the press are they?" Alan just couldn't see reason.

"Did you tell Barton?" Alan looked confused, as Jeff looked confident in his perspective.

"Well it isn't going to be him is it? He's my boss, and the person who is going to have to deal with the press. He wouldn't do that to me." Alan's voice was firm, but Jeff shook his head, and stood up to try and approach his son again.

"Alan you don't know him like I do, okay? He's is using you to get to me." Jeff spoke sensitively but confidently, as he put his arm around his son's shoulders, but Alan took it as arrogance.

"I can't believe I'm hearing this." Alan whispered as he shook his father off him but Jeff continued.

"Alan, listen. This is his revenge, I look like the bad guy, and he looks like your rescuer. He's trying to get even with me Alan, the CCTV images are from his house, how would I get them?" Jeff held up the paper again.

"I already checked that, they're sent to a security company, pay the right person and you'll get the disk." Alan rejected this, and took the opportunity to move away from his father again.

"You just can't believe that Rick's interest in me isn't based on you, can you?" Alan was defensive, as he turned to face his father again.

"Alan just stay away from him. Just come home with me, we can sort this out." Alan smirked.

"Now you're just trying to get at him by using me. Why don't you just leave me the hell alone?" Alan approached the desk only to get his phone, but it rang before he could reach it and Jeff answered it first.

"What the hell are you doing? You're not going to pull him away from me Barton." Jeff Tracy saw the caller's identity and so answered the phone without question.

Alan swore internally he knew instantly it was Richard his Jeff was yelling at.

"Jeff?" Richard was surprised by the voice, and questioned why Alan was with him before responding to the question focused at him.

"I don't know what you mean? It's not like I'm the one that hit his son." Richard got out no more out before Alan's voice appeared and told him he would call him back.

Alan grabbed his phone and headed for the door; he was half way through the hall and heading for the elevators before Jeff grabbed his arm and moved in front of him.

"Alan wait!" Jeff's voice was pleading in nature, and four of Jeff's employees looked towards the pair from their offices.

"You have already had an article about two assaults on me, don't make it three. Let go of me." Alan spoke quietly and his eyes didn't meet Jeff's. Jeff let go and Alan brushed past him without another word. Alan felt exhausted as the elevator doors closed and he travelled the return route to the car park.

"Alan!" Alan stopped just before his car and turned around to see his father approaching again.

"I'm not interested okay." Alan faced away and pressed unlock on his keys as he continued in his path.

"Alan, Richard Barton is dangerous and he is using you. For god's sake Alan you're playing right into his hands, he gives you cars and money, and you just can't see why?"

Jeff pleaded as he pointed to Alan's car and Alan turned to face him again after hearing his words.

"That's all you care about isn't it, getting me away from him just to say you beat him. This has nothing to do with me does it?" Alan rolled his eyes and shook his head is realisation.

Jeff approached his son, each Tracy standing one side of the car door.

"Alan you storm off for months, I don't know where you are, and you won't speak to me. Then I find out your living and working with someone who is using you, and someone who has caused so much trouble for this family already. How do you think that makes me feel Alan? You leave me for him."

Jeff was angry and not hiding it anymore. Alan slammed the car door he had just opened and returned an answer with a similar amount of displeasure.

"I can imagine you felt terrible, so terrible that it took you two minutes to find a replacement for me. As you're assistant ever so nicely informed me that you invited him to live with you, and you insisted he have my 'old' room." Alan tried very hard not to let any traces of sadness be conveyed in his voice.

"What?" Jeff noted Alan insistence of the word 'old', but Alan continued.

"He also mentioned you said I was so naïve and irresponsible that it wouldn't be long before I came crawling back to you. John, who called me this morning yelling at me, also had an opinion on how I must be making you feel. He said the complete lies that I had made up for that article were enough to make you completely ashamed of me, and that I should leave you alone. So how about I listen to my brother for once, and leave. Oh and don't worry about the article I am going to say it's incorrect, I wouldn't want to ruin you're reputation now would I." Alan got in the car and sped out of the car park leaving Jeff confused and troubled.

Jeff Tracy was not known for showing emotions despite whatever was bothering him, but as he sat down back behind his desk he slammed his fist down on to it. Peter Hemmings saw his boss re enter his office, and after a few minutes he knocked on the office door.

"Jeff, is everything okay?" Peter asked calmly, as Jeff looked deep in thought.

"Yes Peter. Everything's fine…Actually will you cancel my meeting for today, and get me John on the video phone." Peter smiled, and turned to leave.

"Peter…" Jeff paused before continuing, Peter had expected this.

"Did you tell Alan that I wanted you to move in with me, and that I had made sure I gave you his bedroom? Jeff spoke softly but firmly, there was only confusion in his voice not accusation.

"No, of course not." Peter looked hurt, and Jeff looked guilty.

"I would never say that. I mentioned to Alan that you were kind enough to let me stay for the short term with you. It's just…" Peter paused and looked hesitant at continuing.

"Just what?" Jeff encouraged with interest as he looked impatiently at the young man.

"When I mentioned it, Alan looked jealous and started yelling at me. He was angry at me as well but I think it was because I heard him on his cell before he saw me enter the room. He started shouting before I even introduced myself, saying that he was having a private conversation and that I shouldn't have been eavesdropping."

Peter looked apologetic and Jeff pointed to a chair in front of his desk for Peter to sit in.

"I'm sorry Jeff I didn't mean to overhear Alan's phone call, I just thought I could get him a coffee while he waited for you. I mentioned I recognised him from all the photos of him at your home. I also said that you would be pleased to see him, and that I was certain you would cancel your meeting today so that you two could talk, but he didn't look impressed." Jeff nodded taking in the information uncomfortably as he moved to sit next to Peter, not wanting to ask the next question.

"Peter…What did Alan say on the phone?" Peter looked down for a minute before looked straight into the eyes of Jeff Tracy.

"He said something about some CCTV being an impressive idea and that this was great payback." Jeff rubbed his hand through his greying hair. Alan had lied to him again. He knew that neither he, Scott or Virgil had spoken about his incidents with Alan to anyone. So either Alan or Richard had spoken to the media, or worse both together had teamed up against him.

Peter moved to leave the room to allow his boss to think but stopped quickly, as he had his back to Jeff he smiled, but quickly put on a worried face as he turned around to face his boss.

"Jeff." Peter's voice was laced with gloom; Jeff Tracy hadn't moved and was staring at the floor deep in thought.

"Yes Peter." He exhaled as he spoke.

"I don't want to say this but, I feel I should." That made Jeff move his head up.

"It can't get worse Peter carry on." Jeff got up disheartened and approached the window to stare out at the city.

"The person on the phone spoke, I don't know what was said but Alan's reply was shocking to me." Jeff looked at Peter directing in the eye; he noted the boy looked troubled and disturbed by Alan's visit.

"Trust me, Alan couldn't have said much more to shock me than what I know."

Peter felt a wave of excitement and contentment pass through him. He didn't feel guilty about his words, as they were only white lies, but Jeff had to believe him and not Alan.

"Alan said that he didn't need you anymore as his dad because he had…well whoever was on the other end of the call." Peter left the room without another word as Jeff Tracy stared out into a cold looking city.

No one could see Jeff Tracy as he heard those words, and if anyone had they would have seen despair and sorrow on his face. Richard Barton had become between him and his wife many times before and during their marriage, Richard had wanted Lucy to leave Jeff for him. After a blazing row about Lucy being pregnant for the fifth time, and Jeff fully blaming his wife for the event, Lucy had gone to stay with Richard for a few weeks. In the last nine months of her life, Lucille Tracy, had spent a lot of time with Richard Barton, Jeff had left for four months to deal with his business move into Asia and Australasia. When Jeff returned despite the arguing and Lucy clearly being unwell, Jeff was let back into her and her boys lives, which meant leaving out Richard. As Jeff stood in his office nearly nineteen years after the events of those months, the emotions returned. To have Alan refer and desire Barton as his father hurt, really hurt.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

Honest Emotions and Hopeful Resolutions

Scott Tracy indicated for his brother to join him in the conversation as soon as he saw his father's face. Jeff looked tired and distant and something was definitely wrong.

"Dad?" Scott asked at Virgil appeared behind him.

"I saw Alan. He blamed me for releasing the article in the paper today and he just couldn't except it was Barton, for who he happened to stick up for the entire time." Jeff spoke in a calm but gloomy tone.

"He came to see you though?" Virgil tried a positive spin from over Scott's shoulder.

"Only to tell me to stay away from him, he thought I spoke to the media to get back at him for leaving." Virgil noted the extra stress and anxious lines on his father's face.

"Oh, and just to make things worse, John had called Alan before he saw me to say Alan had lied and made up the article himself to get back at me." Jeff showed no emotion on his face.

"Do you want me to call John, get him to apologise to Alan?" Scott stated, considering the mess they were in John was the last person he though could make it worse.

"No. I should have told John what happened before now; he was only sticking up for me, he had no idea that what he read had slight foundations in truth. I will call him soon and explain everything, Gordon as well." Jeff had a slight hint of regret in his features.

Scott looked up at Virgil with a concerned look in his blue eyes.

"Dad is there something else?" Virgil posed the question; both were worried about the answer.

"I think Alan may have released that article himself with Barton's help." Jeff had no anger as he spoke, but sadness was noticeable in his eyes.

"Are you sure? Why would he lie and blame you for it?" Virgil looked unconvinced.

"Dad Alan wouldn't do that to you. This is going to ruin you're reputation if people believe it." Scott sounded determined, he knew his baby brother well.

"I know. Alan said he was going to deny that the article was true, but the way he looked at me boys, he hates me. From that revenge isn't a far stretch."

Scott and Virgil Tracy again shared a look, Jeff saw it but continued.

"There's more. Peter said he heard Alan say the CCTV was a great idea to some on the phone, it had to have been Barton he was talking too. Barton's behind this, it's his way to get back at me and Alan helped him do it. " Jeff sighed at his distressing conclusion.

"Dad we need to find out who did this, even if it was Alan, but were going to have to get some evidence." Scott's voice was firm, someone was trying to discredit his family and he wanted to know who.

"How?" The voice came from next to him.

"The CCTV images, an employee at the company must have sold them to someone; we need to find out whom." Scott explained annoyed.

"Barton wouldn't need to pay to see coverage of his own house would he?" Virgil saw fault to his brother's plan quickly.

"Maybe, but someone there would know if a billionaire came for his CCTV disk, he would have had to sign in or get through a gate or something. It's worth a try."

Scott had already decided he was going to find out who sold the disk to the media and wasn't appreciating Virgil's contradictions. His father and Alan could deny that the images were innocent, but someone was behind there release and there negative interpretation. Someone who wanted to destroy his father's reputation and the eldest son wanted to know who.

"You're right, it's time to play hard ball."

The voice surprisingly was not from his brother but from his dad, and both Tracy sons looked surprised he had supported the idea.

"Okay then, let's do it." Scott continued after his fathers surprise support for the plan, still ignoring Virgil's hesitant looks.

"Virgil and I will concentrate on it, we will fly out tomorrow and try and find out who sold that disk to the media." Scott looked pleased that he could possibly find out the source of the leak, but prayed it wasn't his baby brother.

Jeff still looked distant and seemed to be deliberating deeply.

"Dad don't blame and judge Alan until we have the evidence okay?" Virgil pleaded as Jeff nodded. Virgil's assumption that Jeff was concerned over Alan's possible betrayal was misplaced, Jeff corrected him quickly.

"It's not just that Virgil. Alan was so cold, and distant, every time I approached him he moved away from me. I think the damage has been done, he hates me, and he wants Barton instead of me." Jeff's head dropped and he looked elsewhere than at his son's.

"Dad that's ridiculous, Alan…" Virgil started but he was quickly cut off by his father.

"Alan… Alan said …he didn't need me to be his father anymore now he had Barton." The Tracy brothers both let go of a breath neither knew they were holding, but found no words of comfort for their father.

"I have really screwed things up with Alan; he's never going to forgive me is he?" Jeff's eyes looked back at his sons, who both looked shocked and disheartened.

Virgil struggled for words, as did Scott.

"Did he really say that?" Shock covered Scott's face, and Jeff only nodded in response.

"Dad…" Virgil tried, but his father looked so pained by the idea he felt he had no words to console his father in response.

"I'm fine boys; let's just find out who is behind this article, to show Alan it was Barton is my only way to get him home now." Jeff quickly returned to command mode and swallowed his emotions.

"Dad when Alan sees that Barton is trying to ruin you, he will come home to us." Scott sounded determined, and he was, a nod was all he got in return though from Jeff.

"Bye boys, have a safe flight, and let me know when you're here." Jeff gave a half smile to his son's as he signed off.

The eldest Tracy sons stared at a black screen for minutes after their father had signed off before Vigil spoke.

"Do you think Alan did it?" Scott Tracy got up from the desk and walked towards the open doors that showed an unbelievable ocean view, but he never considered it once as he spoke.

"God I hope not, because if he did I don't think there is anything that could then bridge the gap between them." Virgil joined him by his side, neither spoke as there was nothing left to say.

Alan Tracy ached; he had been really pushing his training both in and out of the race car since he arrived in California, and his body was now paying for it. As Alan heaved himself on to a stool in the kitchen of his new house and draped himself over the cool island work surface he heard laughter behind him.

"Shall I give you a massage? Trust me we both would enjoy it?" Alan felt Ben drape his arm over his shoulder as he whispered words right next to Alan's ear.

"I'm sure you would enjoy it." The reply directed to Ben came from his business partner; Richard grabbed a bottle of water for Alan out of the fridge and opened it for him.

"Drink that kiddo." Alan half smiled and met his bosses brown eyes as took the bottle.

"How far did you run kid?" Ben had now removed himself from Alan's body and was placed on the next stool along. Alan looked up at him before replying.

Ben James was slightly younger than Richard, he had brown hair and eyes, and he was assistant CEO of Barton industries. Ben and Alan time together was spent drinking and socialising in Ben's high end clubs. Ben was a cross Alan had decided with Gordon's character and Scott's looks, Ben had developed a wide range of businesses the world over and had multi millions in the bank.

"Far enough for now." Alan stated with sarcasm and hit Ben on the arm at the insult; Ben had always been more mischievous than Richard with him. He acted more like a mate, so Alan didn't have the close relationship with Ben that he had with Richard.

Ben smiled; Alan had been in his life now for more than six months. He had noted his business partner's actions to become like a father to Alan, however he found Alan alluring. He had become especially interested in the relationship between his boss and this young man in front of him. Despite being extremely busy with one of his businesses, that created air craft for both the government and for private companies, Ben was still aware of Alan's and Jeff's troubles. He had taken an interest purposely in the changing relationship between Alan and his father, to see what impact that had on Richard.

"Well running that far must mean daddy's been on the phone again." Ben again considered this strange relationship, as he looked at Richard who moved towards Alan as he spoke.

"Has he called you again?" Richard sat down as Alan noticed that Richard has his white shirt buttons done up in the wrong order. Not for the first time the young driver considered if Richard and Ben sometimes had more than a business relationship.

"I went to see him in New York yesterday; I wanted to ask if he released that article, he denied it." Richard and Ben's eyes met, Ben's contained a dark sparkle that Richard ignored.

"Alan he's lying. He has to be, because I have said nothing and neither have you. Just look what Jeff has gotten out of releasing this information. You did what he wanted; you went to see him, all he needed was your attention. He also gets to place the blame at my door, in an attempt to get you away from me, that's why he did it."

Richard had menace in his voice, and put his hand on Alan's shoulder to comfort the young man. Alan's eyes were fixed on the far wall in front of him.

"I just didn't think he would go this far too get you away from me. If I hadn't denied this he would have been ruined, I doubt assaulting your kids positively effects his business and his public image much." Alan's tanned features were troubled and disappointment shone in his blue eyes.

"Alan, Jeff hates Rick, don't forget that." Alan smirked for one moment at Ben's comment, before sitting up straighter. Ben examined with pleasure how Alan's movement in his tight, sweaty white t-shirt, showed off the young mans toned torso.

"Well now he hates me too. His new assistant filled me in ever so nicely with details of how he was now living in my old room. Jeff sounded like he was playing dad with him at the same time he was backstabbing me."

Alan missed Ben's gaze at him as he got up to leave, he desperately wanted the hurt in his voice not to appear but he didn't quite make it happen.

"Alan." Richard spoke as he got up from the chair but Alan cut him off.

"I'm fine, I just want a shower." Alan had composed himself quickly and his face now was neutral. Ben decided it was now time to lift the mood and to explain the reason behind his laughter at Alan when he first saw him.

"You go for a shower Alan, get out of those sweaty clothes and just relax yourself. I just need to have a quick chat to Rick about the air stewardesses on his jet."

Alan had just left the room has he heard the last bit of the sentence, but he quickly spun around and went back to the kitchen. Ben now had his arm on Richard's shoulders suggestively, but Richard looked totally confused by his words, and annoyed that he had encouraged Alan to leave.

"My air stewardesses. What about them?" Richard noticed Alan's return and the apprehension on the young man's face.

"Well I was thinking that I should have a male stewards when I fly on you're jet, you know just in case I got bored on one long flight for instance." Ben's smile was immense and Alan's head dropped instantly, as Ben aimed his eyes at him.

"Alan do you have an opinion on this, as you're now an official member of the mile high club? Or would you like us to get Juliet to join you in the shower and you can think it over together?" Richard looked between the two before speaking with a smile.

"You had sex with Juliet on my jet?" Alan blushed intently, and headed back to the door ignoring the question.

Ben quickly caught up with the blond and held his hands on Alan's hips from his position, before whispering to Alan in his ear.

"Remind me when I next fly to bring you along with me, we can entertain each other, oh and don't be to long in the shower you have a press conference you know."

Alan shoved off Ben before swearing at him and continuing his path to the shower.

As Ben's socks hit the cold marble of the kitchen his smile disappeared as he saw his boss staring down at the work surface.

"I would have thought you would have been happy after hearing that from Alan. This is what you wanted right?" Ben's back lent against the units in the kitchen as he looked at Richard for a response; his joking attitude was gone. Replacing it was a devious smirk and a manipulating tone to his voice as he continued.

"You want Alan all to yourself with Jeff out of the picture don't you? I know I wouldn't mind that myself for a couple of hours!" Richard looked up with an un-humoured face at that end remark, but Ben concentrated on the jealous look in his eyes.

"Yeah, well you know what you can do with that idea don't you." Richard looked with interest and irritation at his business partner, who just smiled smugly in return.

Richard and Ben knew each other well, they had been partners for over ten years in business, and occasionally in the bedroom, but there relationship was still a casual friendship.

"I'm just helping Alan out, nothing more." Richard smiled as he lifted the glass he had been drinking from.

"I might owe Jeff a favour though." Richard smiled.

Richard Barton watched Alan on the television from his seat in Alan's dressing room; Alan was smiling happily at the cameras at the post race press conference. Richard continued to watch the scenes live but hit the mute button and then moved to shut the door before pulling out his cell phone.

"Jeff. Its Richard Barton, I just called to say I owe you a thank you." The smugness in his voice was clear.

"What do you want?" Jeff was irritated by the call.

"Like I said, to thank you for pushing Alan further away from you, and closer too me. I was thinking though if you're going to take in all you're employees into your home and treat them like your replacement sons, you're really going to have to move to a bigger house." Richard's humour was directly aimed to hurt Jeff, and Richard didn't restrain his chuckle.

"I'm not replacing Alan with anyone; you're forgetting one crucial thing Barton. Alan is my son, not yours. You can buy him the world, but you will never be his father." Jeff spat, his hatred for this man only grew.

"That's true biologically I suppose, but that's not what I'm interested in. When Alan first kicked in Lucy, I was there. When she fell asleep exhausted I kissed her stomach. When Alan was younger I spent four hours with him in an elevator and I couldn't get over the little boy in front of me. When Alan lived with Rachel's parents for two and a half years, I was the one who got a scout to train Alan for racing. I was there watching him play soccer on a Saturday, I saw him score the goals and see the smile on his face. Not you. Alan should have been mine, our child, mine and Lucy's. So when you abandoned your son because he reminds you of Lucy, you turned your back on Alan. He will never forgive you for that Jeff, and neither would Lucy." Richard spoke with a real astonishment and resentment for the opportunity Jeff had wasted, while he smiled with pride at the television images of Alan before him.

Jeff paused in shock before speaking breathlessly, "You…you have been stalking Alan, what is wrong with you? Why are you so obsessed with my son?"

"I was waiting for the time when we would both get what we deserved. I get the son I never got, and Alan gets a proper father for the first time in his life."

Jeff didn't get to reply as Richard shut off the call when he heard Alan's voice in the corridor.

"Congratulations on the win Alan, you were amazing to watch out there." The young woman reporter shouted from a packed media audience.

"Thank you." The young driver returned.

"It didn't seem to look like any of the off track events were bothering you today, were they?" She continued.

"No. I had a race to win and I won it. I love this circuit and I am hoping to get more practise in here while we go on mid season break, and I hope to be even better in two months."

Alan moved to the next reporter, he wasn't a fan of the media, especially today.

"Alan would you like to comment on the reports of assault on you by you're father?"

"Anything you may have read is wrong, okay. I am sure that I am not the only one to have fallen down some wet steps. Someone took that and fabricated a story, nothing more. I'm sorry but I won't comment on it anymore."

Alan's voice was neutral and Mark Hamilton, his co driver showed his support by a smile.

Alan and Mark had become great mates over the past four years as both trained under the same coach and at the same race school in New York state.

"You are so daring on the track Alan; you seem to take so many more risks with speed, and in cornering than other greats have before. Is that the secret to you winning as a rookie?" Alan recognised to older reporter from watching F1 on TV before he was a driver.

"I am not sure I could be called a 'great' driver, but thanks for the compliment. I love to take risks on the track; I have practised them before so they're less daring than they probably look." Alan always seemed to underestimate his abilities when looking back at the race.

The older driver next to Alan cut in.

"Ignore him, Alan is a natural at this he was born to live on the edge, if he isn't doing anything that's fast he is really grumpy. Isn't that right daredevil?"

The audience laughed, as did Alan. Mark made everything into a joke; the twenty two year olds English accent was confident and crisp. In nature Mark was easy going and understanding, he was the only boy of an English mother and American father, who had divorced years ago. He and Alan had quickly become best mates, as both had similar backgrounds. Alan had even invited Mark to stay at his new home in LA during mid season break so they could train together. Alan saw this as returning a favour, as Mark had let he stay with him after he first left home.

"Thank you for that." Alan faked annoyance and returned to the press in front of him.

"Alan you have gathered in only a small number of races, many fans, do they include your family?"

Alan smiled, despite his father trying his best to keep the media away from his children, Alan knew how they worked.

"I would like to thank any fans I have for their support, I think new drivers create new fans and that's good for the sport. I have all the support I need from many sources."

Alan replied as a journalist would: a dodged question, a half answer.

"Thank you, I owe you a beer." Alan smiled and appreciated the support of his best friend as he walked towards back to the dressing rooms after the conference. Mark had not asked about the article, or had pried into Alan's family life at all. Alan had often spent dinners with Mark, his sister and his mother, and she supported both 'her boys', as she called them, at every race. He and Mark had become especially close due to his sister being Alan's girlfriend for the past two years. However since he had began racing they had ended their relationship, Alan knew he couldn't ask her to quit college to follow him around the world. The last eight months had been hard without her being his girlfriend, there had been other girls for the night, but none had managed to distract his attention away from her.

As Alan entered his dressing room he found Richard sitting in a chair just ending a call before he approaching him for a hug.

"Nice one son," Alan returned the embrace in full.

"I was worried you had pushed her too hard at one point in that race I thought you were going to spin off." Richard redirected the idea behind the embrace onto his concern for Alan in the race.

"Don't tell anyone, but so did I." Alan pulled off his driving suit and headed for the shower.

"The jet is waiting for us at LAX, Juliet is on board. But, erm…if your are going to get up to anything with her can you wait till we land in New York first, and I'm off the flight?

Richard didn't hide the laughter in his voice well.

"Very funny, are you and Ben ever going to drop it?" Alan reappeared with a towel around his waist.

"I doubt that. So are you going to have your little art injection before you leave LA?" Richard opened his blackberry as he spoke and moved uncomfortably; he had regretted wearing a suit in the baking hot conditions of LA.

"Yes, and you don't have a hope in hell of talking me out of it." Alan yelled from the bathroom between brushing his teeth. Alan noticed in the mirror Richard appear at the door to the small bathroom.

"Why would I talk you out of doing something you want to do? Alan I support you in everything you know that." Alan paused, Richard had emphasised the last words.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to compare you to Jeff." Alan turned around to face his boss. He was having a tattoo of his race time placed on his back in memory of Rachel; his father would detest that idea.

"You don't mind if I have some of my stuff from your house moved to my house here in LA do you? Richard laughed at Alan hesitance.

"Alan, that's fine. Let's go home and celebrate a move to LA. You know that doesn't mean you're getting rid of me? Alan smiled.

"I know." Alan faked annoyance, and a whine was present in his voice.

"Now get in the shower you stink, and erm… Juliet won't like that!" Richard quickly shut the door as Alan grabbed a towel and threw it in his direction.

"She was just a…one night or day thing, nothing more." Richard nodded, he had noted apart from two one night stands Alan's interest in women had been minimal since he began racing.

"Looking for a distraction from a certain someone are we?" Richard asked knowing the answer.

"Alan, your mom had by heart for years and years, I slept with a hell of a lot of people in that time, but none could stop me loving your mother. Why don't you talk to her?" Richard suggested.

"When I speak to her its worse because I miss her more. I dated Lana for two years while everything was a nightmare with Jeff, she was the only reason I stayed at home." Alan confessed a slice of his life before meeting Richard, he had carefully hid his relationship with Lana from his father, as he knew she would only be seen as a distraction from his studies.

"Call her, Alan. If you love her and you let her go, you'll spend the rest of your life regretting it." Alan looked up to see a reflection of regret on Richard's features, a personal mistake in his life was being exposed.

Jeff Tracy pulled off his jacket as he entered his office. It was becoming late evening and Jeff had just sent a delivery express package before returning to his office as he was expecting a call from John, Virgil and Scott. As if reading his thoughts his video phone bleeped, and his middle son appeared on screen.

"Hey dad, sorry I didn't get to ring you before now its just I had to finish the book." Jeff smiled proudly, he had wished to speak to John the day he had seen Alan but hadn't wanted to distract the young man.

"That's okay John, I'm glad of some good news." John looked his usual composed self, smart and well presented in a traditional manner.

"So that means I'm ready to join Scott and Virgil with their work now the book is done." John looked pleased at the idea.

"That's fantastic John, you and Brains are going to get on great." Jeff Tracy had no doubt about that.

"John." John Tracy looked uncertain why his father had paused, and taken on a more serious tone.

"Did you accuse Alan of releasing this article to the media?" John's famous composure cracked.

"Yeah dad, he deserved it! Why did he say those things?" Jeff could count on one hand how many times he had heard John raise his voice in anger, this was one of them.

"Some of it was true John. I hit Alan out of anger over a year ago after an argument, but when he slipped the other day it was an accident. We all do things we regret in life, I bet eighty percent of my regrets focus around Alan, but I regret hitting him that night more than anything." John looked dazed.

"What?" Jeff forced himself to explain some more by the confused look on his son's face, guilt kicked in again.

"We had been arguing, it's a long story, mainly about your mom." Jeff left it there; his head again beginning to pound with pain.

"I can't belief it." John paused for a moment or two, but looking into his father's eyes he saw the regret clearly.

"Dad if you regret it, and apologized, then why did Alan release that information to the media?" John's shock still remained; his father wouldn't hurt a fly with intent and John knew it.

"I don't know John. I know he is really angry at me, but he said he didn't do it, instead he thinks I did it." Jeff looked no less strained than when he had spoken to Scott and Virgil, he had been sleeping less and working more recently.

"What?" John felt he may have been dreaming this.

"Listen John, Scott is going to find out who did this and then we can go from there."

Jeff had a short attention span today; the media were bothering him for a return comment after Alan had addressed the issue. He had released a press statement of denial and thanks to Alan's comments of agreement the media had been silenced slightly. A headline to discredit him was now the most popular angle being spoken about for the reason behind this story.

"Do you want me to call and apologise to Alan?"

John didn't sound apologetic as he spoke, and he wasn't, he wanted to know who released the information for the article first.

"No, especially not in that tone of voice, I'm hoping he will call me, I just sent his watch to him."

John Tracy looked down at his own arm and the expensive watch that adorned it, his had a purple background and so made the diamonds surrounding it appeared light purple. Scott's had been blue, Virgil's yellow, and Gordon's orange.

"What colour did you go for then?" Jeff looked up and smiled. Well I chose all your colours by your character, so I went for white with Alan.

"White, meaning innocent and angelic? Oh yes that's so Alan." John laughed.

"Well I went for the idea based on youth, but he is innocent and angelic in appearance if you want to look at it that way I suppose." Jeff smiled at the idea.

"Why don't you fly to New York and stay with me and your brothers for a bit John. I'd love most of my son's at home again, even if I'm missing one." Jeff enjoyed the idea, despite its bitter ending.

"Sure dad, I'll find a flight and I'll see you soon." John smiled and ended the call.

Jeff sighed; he had sent Alan his much delayed eighteenth birthday present today after a call from Richard Barton. If Jeff was losing Alan he hadn't meant it to happen, this was his last attempt to show he did really love his son, but he just couldn't deal with the negative memories that came with Alan.

The watch was to be delivered tomorrow to Barton's home address in New York, he hoped Alan would call or come see him after getting the gift. Alan would know the meaning behind the gift, a sentimental piece given to represent moving into a new chapter of your life. If Alan accepted the gift maybe there was still hope for Alan and him.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Relationships Re-examined and Calculated Conclusions

Alan awoke to a ringing sound, and quickly identified it as his cell phone. He decided he must have fallen asleep on the flight to Richard house as he groggily answered the call. Alan felt absolutely exhausted, but luckily now it was mid season break for the racing teams, but Alan was just as determined to push himself.

"Hello?" His eyes shut again as he spoke.

"Well hello sleepy head, oh dear…did I wake up sleeping beauty?" Alan sighed and rubbed his eyes with this unoccupied hand.

"Gordon. Is that you?" Alan yawned.

"Of course it is. How is my favourite speed freak of a baby bro? Gordon sounded practically overjoyed.

"Tired, I'm just on a flight heading to New York to move some of my things for a few days before I go back to train in California." As soon as he said it Alan realised he had just given away his location.

"Well so am I, so do you fancy a night out together in the city? It'll be fun, let's just take a moment to imagine it." Gordon paused before continuing his theatrical account. Alan cringed; he was still surprised the academy hadn't given his brother an Oscar for performances like these yet.

"I'll be there with a beer in my hand, and you'll be there with a soda in yours. I'll be going to sleep with a hot girl by my side after getting some action, and you'll be sleeping next to your teddy bear, which last saw some action when the cat got confused. What do you think kiddo?" Alan burst out laughing and knew Gordon had a huge smirk on his face just by hearing his voice.

"I think you're annoying, and that the last girl you had in your bed was probably inflated." Alan was still smiling, he actually did like the idea of seeing Gordon, and he had missed him lately.

"Come on grumpy, it's just you and me, no other bossy big brothers. I promise Al." Gordon's attitude made Alan smile, Gordon engineered an idea as he spoke, so continued.

"I know what; I will tell you a secret if you come out with me?" Gordon was very persuasive when he wanted something.

"Okay, okay, I'll come out for one drink. Now, what's the secret?" Alan sounded like his old self now to Gordon, and that made part of him feel sad that he hadn't heard Alan like this for a long time.

"Scott waxes his chest, and then rubs moisturise in to it to make his skin soft, I caught him doing it last time I was on leave and at home. Apparently he's very sensitive about the subject Virgil says, and Scott does it to show of his chest." Alan couldn't hold it in and laughed out loud again, joining his brother in fits of laughter at the image.

"Alright you got me Gordon; I'll come out with you. God I would have done virtually anything to hear that. It will have to be later tonight though, I need some more sleep before I am up to going out. I will text you the details later on." Gordon laughter was contagious to changing Alan's mood, and it always had been.

"Fantastic Al, I knew you had missed me. How could anyone not miss me?" Gordon sounded amazed by the question he posed.

"Gordon." Alan's voice now lacked humour, and sounded serious and hesitant Gordon noticed, but he didn't match his brother's tone.

"Yes Allie." Alan rolled his eyes at that name; Scott always called him that when he was concerned about him, its use now by Gordon was only to annoy him.

"Don't break you're promise. No one else but you, okay?" Alan's tone was darker again.

"I won't Alan, it'll be just me." Gordon dropped the jolliness and gave his brotherly trust.

"Now get lost I want some sleep." Alan faked grumpiness this time, and his casual tone was back.

"Yeah you go back to sleep. You don't want to loose those gorgeous baby boy looks do you, otherwise I just have to take care of that girlfriend of yours." Alan smirked at that idea.

"Ex-girlfriend remember, anyway it's not like we can date when were in different countries is it?" Alan hadn't introduced Lana and Gordon to each other but since Gordon had found out him secretly seeing Lana he had told him some things about there relationship.

"Whatever, I have seen the way you are when your thinking about her… you love her…" Gordon had gone into ultrasonic frequencies for the last bit, and Alan didn't reply.

"Bye Gordon." Gordon ended the call happy that Alan was wiling to trust him again.

Alan sat back and glanced at the window, Gordon had reminded him again how much he was looking forward to seeing Lana while he was in California. The split between them had been mutual, with Alan travelling and Lana studying, a relationship wouldn't have been fair, but he had truly missed her. Since his conversation with Richard he decided they should meet up at his new home, since Mark was staying there he had invited Lana too.

Alan examined his phone and scrolled down until had found the last message Lana had sent him as his girlfriend; it was dated just before he started training for Richard's team.

'Go have fun, and show the world your talent Alan, we will be together again when we can I'm certain of that. I love you Alan, Lana.'

He had secretly read this message before all of the main races this season.

Alan smiled before dialling her number. As soon as he heard her sweet English accent, he found himself recalling all the times they had spent together, over the two years they had dated. Their relationship had been a secret from Alan's family. However when your girlfriend is your best friend, and racing partner's sister, the secret was instantly out to her brother and mom. Alan had slotted into the small Hamilton family well, and after training Alan often spent dinner with the family while his father worked until late.

"Hi… I just wanted to call to say that I miss you…" Alan spoke slowly and softly.

From first seeing her Alan had been star struck by Mark's sister, he may have been sixteen but Alan knew she was special as she instantly reminded him of Rachel. It had been at Alan's first day at a higher level racing driving when they met. She had been there with her mom to watch Mark race. Alan had been introduced to her when she had slipped on the steps to the stadium and Alan had saved her from falling. One look into the large brown eyes, and her whispering 'my hero' in her soothing voice by Alan's ear had him mesmerised, so much so she had to ask him to let her out of his arms.

Alan smiled at the memory as he listened to her speak; the torment he had gotten about that meeting was never ending. Being with Lana even if only for a small time gave him a feeling he hadn't really had since Rachel died, happiness. However he still locked away his thoughts his feelings from her, and he blamed his past for that.

Alan had learnt from his father about how to deal with emotions. He had been hurt to many times by caring for people who were now not with him, so the blond had learnt to show nothing too no one.

Alan's mind flashed back to the news article about the allegation of abuse on him by Jeff. The blond had any mixed feelings as he looked out the window again, the more time he spent with Richard the more he resented Jeff's behaviour towards him as his father. Alan knew he wasn't innocent in this, he wanted his father to hurt like he did. He wanted some sort of revenge for the feelings his father had caused him, he just didn't know if he had made a mistake in the path he had taken to do so.

The black BMW slowed outside a small warehouse. The building was situated far from the suburbia that the security company watched over, and the place seemed deserted.

"Is this the right place?" Virgil Tracy asked from the driver's seat. He, John and Gordon all shared the same car these days as none of them were at home at the same time.

"Do you really think I would get this wrong Virgil?" Scott sounded irritated by the comment.

"Let's go. Leave the car here, but grab that bag." Scott instructed.

"What's this?" Virgil looked confused at the small black bag he held.

"You think that someone is just going to give us information for free Virgil?" Scott walked towards the guard barrier, which Scott noticed with pleasure contained a worker. Virgil showed dismay at the idea but followed his brother.

"Hi, I need to find a person who gave out or sold a CCTV disk to someone last week." Scott looked firm and confident; his military training had taught him how to succeed in these situations.

I man in his mid twenties looked Scott up and down before speaking. The worker was surprised by the directness of this stranger, and his clothing and attitude exposed that his man was wealthy and used to getting his own way.

"Were not allowed to do that, we'd get fired if we did. I can't help you." The worked got up from his chair and abandoned his X box game and cup of coffee, and moved towards the door of the small cabin to close it.

.

"It was you wasn't it? All you do is file recordings of disks, how many people do you need to do that? How about two thousand dollars for one name, and no-one need know you sold anything to anyone?" The worker and Virgil both stared at Scott with surprise as he slammed his hand into the blue door to stop it from shutting.

"You can afford more than that? And if you don't, I'm not sure I can remember who you mean." The man had a strong New York accent, and Scott quickly decided he didn't like the arrogant attitude of the man before him.

"Five is my max, so take it and talk." Scott's military training helped him again to restrain his annoyance, as he took the bag of Virgil and threw it at the man standing a few feet away from him.

"He didn't leave a name, he just asked for a disk of some footage from a house in the suburbs." The worker was examining the contents of the bag as he spoke.

"Describe him then?" Scott took the bag off him and tossed it on to the desk behind, as the worker looked back up at him with annoyance.

"Tall, blond, younger than you but nicer though." He shrugged his shoulders and smirked as Scott shot him an icy glare.

"That's it." Scott bellowed.

"It was dark, but he… he was driving a silver sports car." The man shut the door in Scott's face.

"Alan." Scott said in disbelieve not aiming it at anyone, as he turned to face his brother Virgil looked just as despairing at what they had learnt.

Scott walked swiftly past him and back to the car, Virgil followed shouting his name.

"Scott."

"I can't believe he did this Virgil, does he hate dad and us that much?" Scott never turned back around to face his brother but stopped dead in his tracks. Virgil moved around to face his brother and saw sadness in his eyes.

"I don't know why Alan spoke to the media and why he gave them that disk but I do know Alan will never forget his eldest brother's help that he has had. You were there for him Scott everyday when he was little, when dad couldn't cope after mom died, Alan loves you so much for doing that."

Virgil tried to get through, but Scott looked closed off by the information he had just heard. Alan had betrayed his family, he had used one mistake by his father to get support and attention for himself, and in the process tarnish the reputation of Jeff Tracy.

"What do I tell dad Virgil?" Scott looked to Virgil with despair, neither had any answer.

Jeff Tracy called in Peter from his office, just after ending the phone call to John. Jeff was anxious to get home and await the arrival of three of his sons, especially if the eldest two had been successful at finding the source of the media leak.

"Yes Jeff." Peter sounded as lively as usual.

"I'm sorry about this Peter, but I wondered if you would mind staying at one of the companies rented apartments from now on. It's just the four eldest are back tonight and tomorrow, and I really want some time with them by myself. The apartment is free to you of course, and it's only a few blocks away from here, is that okay with you?" Peter's face fell, and Jeff noted the shock and panic on it.

"Have I done anything wrong Jeff?" Peter almost pleaded for the answer.

"No of course not…" Jeff looked apologetic before Peter quickly interrupted.

"I don't mind being there with your boys; maybe me being there would make you all forget that Alan isn't there?" Jeff looked disturbed by the idea.

"I'm not going to forget that Alan not here even if you are there Peter, I would just like some time with my boys by myself." Peter's worries grew by Jeff's intriguing expression.

"Of course you would like some time with them. That's no problem; do you mind if I stay here and finish up a bit of work for Monday though before I head to the apartment?" Peter composed himself, but anger boiled underneath his voice.

"Of course not, you're a great employee Peter; I will see you on Monday, the address is in the clientele file." Jeff smiled as he picked up his briefcase and walked past the young man heading for home.

The clock in the hall of the Tracy home had just stroked ten pm when Jeff heard the arrival of a car on the drive, and didn't hesitated before going downstairs to meet his sons. He himself had only just arrived home from work, and had just been about to change his clothes when he heard the car, but that was forgotten as he made is way down the stairs. Jeff's feet noted the cold marble beneath him as he moved down the stairs, but seeing Scott's face as the stairs curved around made a cold shiver run down his spine.

Virgil Tracy shut the door and turned to notice his father not far from the bottom of the staircase; he had stopped in his tracks and was examining him and Scott.

Virgil knew his father would be anxious about what they had found, and this was evident in seeing him. Jeff stood with his un-tucked blue shirt open and cufflink off, and Virgil knew his father was gutted by the news. Scott Tracy wasn't often speechless, and at this moment he had no reason to say anything. His father now knew Alan was guilty by his own persona and lack of words. Jeff Tracy let go of the banister and stared at Scott only speaking to confirm his knowledge.

"Alan?" Scott nodded in response to his father.

"The description was a definite fit to Alan; we spoke to the employee who sold him the disk. He lied." Scott spoke with no emotion, but noted the mixed of anger, sadness and disappointment in his father's face.

"Dad?" Virgil called out, as his father turned to go back the way he came.

"Just give me a bit of time on my own boys; I'll see you in the morning, John's already asleep so don't wake him up will you." Jeff sounded exhausted but Virgil knew he wouldn't sleep much tonight.

Scott moved to follow his father but Virgil's hand held him back.

"Leave him until tomorrow Scott, there isn't anything else you can do now." Scott turned and slammed his hands on to the nearest wall.

"Why did he do this?" Virgil had no answer, his brother was furious.

"Where are you going?" Virgil asked as Scott stormed past him towards the door snatching his keys to his Porsche on the way.

"To find Alan." Scott yelled back exiting the house.

"Scott, dad needs you here, and you don't even know where Alan is right now. Don't be stupid, will we find where Alan is and go see him in a few days, for now it's dad that needs us to be here."

Virgil looked at his eldest brother; after he had spoken Scott had stopped and was now leaning his arms forward on to the side of his sports car.

"I just want to make things right between them, mom would hated this." Scott's composure cracked for an instant. Emotion was evident in his voice and his eyes as he remembered the time he had spent with Alan in his cars over the years.

"I know." Scott looked up at his brother, as he heard the same sadness in Virgil's voice; he resumed his usual controlled composure and moved to embrace his younger brother. After a second Scott dropped an arm and rolled his eyes at Virgil ability to change his behaviour like no one else could, with one arm still around his brother he walked back inside the house.

"Come on, I need I drink." Virgil smiled in agreement.

The light shone through the tree canopy intermittently covering Gordon Tracy in either sunlight or shadow, as he walked up the long drive to his childhood home. Gordon knew the troubles that inhabited this house at the moment, and they were in stark contrast to the memories of his youth here. Gordon smirked as he looked at the large lawns that inhabited many an old oak tree, the fun his brothers and he had in them would last a lifetime. Today though, he was here not to judge either Alan or his father, but to hopefully show his brother that he did have support in his family no matter what he had or hadn't done. As Gordon saw the large white traditional featured house in front of him, he chuckled as a plan formed in his mind, the early hour of six am would work to his advantage.

Virgil Tracy murmured and moaned at the words he heard in his semi conscious state, someone was holding him and he was enjoying it. As he opened his sleepily eyes and as he shifted his body weight Virgil remembered where he was, he suddenly became concerned and turned around quickly before screaming.

"Oh Virgil, oh Virgil… I love you Virgil, cuddle up to me again."

Gordon Tracy had to stop himself from laughing as he put on a soft feminine voice and made his breath felt on his brother's ear. Gordon had previously snuck into his brother's room straight after entering the house. Everyone knew Virgil slept like the dead, so he was an easy target when asleep. Gordon had rapped his arms around his brother and was only pushed away by Virgil's quick movement and anxious scream.

Jeff Tracy hadn't slept well, and as he entered the upstairs hallway one look at Scott leaving his bathroom showed a similar tale. Before the two had time to speak though, a scream came from Virgil's room, both ran in that direction and swiftly opened the door.

Scott Tracy looked confused, shocked, but then very amused at a panic stricken Virgil Tracy and a crying with laughter Gordon Tracy.

"Gordon!" Virgil yelled, he was still covered by his duvet and his hair was stuck out at many irregular angles, and fury was shown on his face.

"Gordon?" The name was then repeated by his father.

"Hey dad…Scott… did you….miss me?" Gordon barely managed those words through laughter, as he rolled around on the floor.

"What happened?" Scott smiled, and even Jeff had to try hard not to look amused by Virgil's look.

"I just thought I would wake up Virgil up in a loving manner because I missed him, and he got mad at me. Can you believe that behaviour from my own brother?" Gordon's smile was evil and mischievous.

"What? You were cuddling me and telling you loved me, in a girl's voice!" Virgil grabbed a pillow and threw it at his brother as he spoke, as both his elder brother and father started laughing from where they stood in the doorway.

Jeff continued smiling as he made his way to his pillow holding son, before pulling him up and embraced him with real pleasure at his return.

"It's nice to have you home son." Jeff hugged his son, while smiling at Virgil.

"Is it?" Virgil quietly commented, but Jeff ignored it.

"So, here we are all back under the same roof for a while, this is going to be fun." Gordon spoke with a cheeky smile as he jumped on to Virgil's bed to sit next to his older sleep deprived brother and hugged him.

"Well most of us are here." Jeff still smiled but this time it wasn't heartfelt.

"Gordon, why don't you go and wake up John, and then we'll meet you two downstairs for breakfast." Scott was keen to return the mood of the room back to its previous state.

"Okay big brother, whatever you say I'll do." Gordon smiled devilishly and ran from the room slapping Scott on the back as he went by him.

Virgil sighed. "John's going to kill you Scott." Scott looked at him for more information.

"You just said wake him." Virgil explained as he fell back onto his pillows and pulled the duvet over his head, as Scott shot an apologetic look in the direction of John's room. Sure enough as Jeff and Scott reached the kitchen, a shriek of one name echoed through the house again, but this time from the middle Tracy's mouth.

The day was spent talking, and messing around by the four Tracy's and their father, Jeff still looked troubled but enjoyed seeing his four elder boys spend time together. After Scott had made lunch in the un-seasonally mild day, Virgil and John had their revenge at Gordon by throwing him in the indoor pool fully clothed. The four boys had then spent the afternoon swimming and playing tennis, while Jeff had watched. Scott over breakfast had wanted to talk about Alan, but Jeff insisted that he would deal with Alan tomorrow. Secretly Jeff wanted to see Alan's reaction to his gift first before confronting him about the evidence he had about his betrayal.

At six pm Gordon Tracy had finished changing and showering after his swim, and was ready to meet his brother in a bar in the city. He had heard from Virgil that Alan had been the one to give the details to the media about Alan and his father's issues, and it had shocked him. Gordon however decided he had to keep his promise to go meet his brother alone, no matter what evidence Scott had.

Gordon Tracy crept to the front door; he was dressed in smart black trousers and a dark green shirt.

"Gordon, are you going out?" John Tracy lowered his book; he was sitting on a chair in the reading room next to the front hall, when he noticed a smartly dressed Gordon trying to sneak out. John's tone may not have been harsh or loud but his words drew attention to Gordon, and both Scott and Virgil appeared in the hallway.

"Erm… I'm just going out for a bit yeah." Gordon opened the door, but was encouraged for more by Virgil.

"Is it that important to go out now Gordon? Dad wants us to have a family dinner together." Virgil looked at Scott, something else was going on Gordon always said when and where he was going when he went out.

"Gordon, you're not going out tonight." Scott was firm in his tone to support Virgil's words.

"Oh come on, I won't be long. John, you don't mind me leaving do you?" Gordon looked at his nearest in age brother for help, but John only looked unsure but he guessed Gordon was up to something.

"No, but dad will. Please stay in tonight Gordon just for him, okay. You can go out next week." John knew Gordon normally wouldn't want to cause an argument about such a silly thing.

"I can't, I have to go." Gordon stepped out on to the wooden front porch, as he heard Scott calling after him.

"Gordon, get in here now." Scott moved to stand in front of his brother on the porch, and pointed back to the door.

"Don't be selfish Gordon, it's just one night." Scott's voice was lower than before as he didn't want to alert their father to the event.

"I will make it up to dad, okay, so move out of my way Scott, please!" Scott looked bemused at the unusual behaviour from Gordon; he was never one to be demanding or purposely wanting to cause disagreements.

"No. Gordon what has gotten in to you, just do as you are told. I expect this behaviour from Alan not you, and just because he has run off doesn't mean you can start acting like his replacement." Scott griped Gordon's arm and turned him around to face back the way he came, as he did he saw his noticed his father was standing next to John in the doorway.

"What do you normally get from Alan?" Jeff asked confused at the situation, before noticing Gordon's attire.

"Nothing. Gordon was going out, but now he has changed his mind." Scott spoke casually but Gordon's face didn't agree, and had shades of annoyance plastered on it, and Jeff saw it.

"Gordon son please stay in tonight, it's not like you boys come home a lot is it?" Jeff appealed to Gordon, who then felt trapped on all sides.

"Dad… I'm sorry." Virgil and John both looked amazed by Gordon's defiance even at his father's plea.

Gordon angled his head and sighed. "I have to go out, I promised someone." Realization dawned on the faces in front of him, but it was Scott who spoke.

"It's Alan, isn't it?" Gordon turned to face his brother, and was taken aback by the bitterness in Scott's now bellowing voice.

"He's here at Barton's isn't he?" It was more than a statement than a question, as his eldest brother let go of Gordon and moved to approach his car.

"Scott I promised Alan I would see him on my own, if he sees you he will never forgive me. Please just let me go on my own." Gordon took off after him and his voice had an imploring tone as Gordon put his hand on the car door to block Scott's exit plan.

"Tough, I need to see him." Scott looked amazed at Gordon's request.

"I can't believe after him lying and then blaming dad for releasing that article you want to go see him, he's causing so much trouble Gordon." John was now strongly questioning his brother's actions.

"He's my baby brother John, and yours too don't forget." Gordon turned to face John who was now standing behind him.

"Listen, I know you all think Alan sold that article to get back at us and you dad, and that he's lying, but when I look that idea it just doesn't match Alan." Gordon spoke with certainty and strength in his beliefs.

"Alan isn't intentionally malice or purposely devious, and he wouldn't want such negative judgements being held over this family; and he would never be the source of that happening. All he wanted was some space and some support, and you're judging him on behaviours that he would never do. Why do you believe others and not him? If he says it's true and that he did do it then Alan isn't the person I thought he was, but until then I am going to believe what he says, because he's my brother."

"Gordon." Jeff spoke and Gordon turned to face him nervously.

"Just make sure he is okay will you." Jeff spoke with sadness before hugging his son.

Gordon walked off down the gravel drive as the last rays of light were lost from the sky. His brothers and father didn't follow him, and he had left them all in thought and uncertainty. By god Gordon hoped Alan was telling the truth.

Alan Tracy's silver Mercedes pulled up outside the Barton residence and as he opened the front door he noticed a small parcel with his name on sitting behind a plant pot. Alan opened the outside cardboard box and considered its contents. The likelihood of its origin Alan thought was Richard, but then why leave it outside the door to his home?

The blond held the package as he entered the house. There were no cars present outside the house, and the quiet interior also suggested to Alan that he was alone for now. A note from Richard confirmed he was out at a dinner meeting. Alan had introduced his brother to Ben at the club, but Ben hadn't stayed to chat long, stating he was going upstairs to his office to work. Alan had left the club a little later than Gordon, after having another drink with Ben in the office. Alan had decided he had enjoyed his night with Gordon, and was glad Gordon hadn't mentioned any recent events with his father. Gordon only said that all Alan' brothers were home for the moment, and left it there, for that he was grateful.

Alan made his way to his room opening the package further as he went, with the packaging off a posh black and white box remained. Alan sat on the end of his bed as he carefully lifted the lid and revealed a small envelope inside on which was a short hand written message. Alan instantly knew the sender and what the box also contained, the young man felt hesitant at continuing and decided to examine what he knew would be a watch first.

As he removed the card and placed it on the bed, the tissue moved too revealed a dazzling white diamond watch. Alan was surprised his father had continued this tradition with him now after everything they had been through together. He also pondered the questioned of why now his father had decided to send him his much delayed birthday gift? Mixed emotions filled the blonds mind and face; he knew Jeff always engraved a word on the back of each watch.

The word was always related to space travel, to represent his father's life, but also the word was chosen to represent something that Jeff saw in each of his sons. Scott's was Mercury; his card had details on it of why Mercury had been chosen. Mercury was the first manned space exploration missions and is also the first planet in our solar system; a relevant word for his first born son. Alan remembered reading the cards of both his elder brothers, it had details of how proud Jeff was of Scott, like Mercury Scott was the leader, and his strength and protective nature held no bounds.

Aurora was emblazed on Virgil's watch which was surrounded by yellow gems. Aurora was a beautiful mix of coloured lights that inspire artists and poets, just as Virgil's work did, Jeff had written. Aurora is also a feature on Mercury to show the variation of light and dark, Jeff had compared Virgil's similarities and differences with Scott and how they both were a wonderful combination for an unbreakable bond.

Alan broke his memories as he turned over the watch. Alan thought over the word before reading the card. Of all the space related words to describe his son Alan had expected something in line to describe the problems the pair had, he wasn't prepared for what he read.

The small white card was opened with caution, and the blond stared with amazement at its wording.

Intrepid

For Alan, my youngest son

Intrepid was the name given to Apollo twelve's Luna Module, named after the valiant efforts and sacrifice taken by so many people to reach the moon. Alan your bravery to accept and learn from the loss and sorrow that has marred your life astonished me. Your efforts to help save Rachel's parents when your life was in danger showed the foundations of your character, your courage. Alan your mother had the same sprit that I see in you. Seeing you shows me that not all of her is lost and that inspires me to develop the same bravery so that one day I can be the father you deserve.

Alan I love you and I always have, Dad.

Alan Tracy sat in disbelief, and re-read the card again; he truly never believed his father could ever love him because he had caused the death of his mother. Alan had felt the resentment from his father everyday of his life, and the guilt he carried over his mother's death had influenced every aspect of his life. It was the broken bridge between he and his dad, and both were too hurt to very try and rebuild it, or so he believed. Alan had barely ever heard his father speak of his mother to him apart from in an odd argument; he knew it hurt his father too much. Around his father in the past few years, Alan had also tried to hide his trademark resemblances to his mom. His blond hair was often covered with a hat or he had his sunglasses on; or mostly he just avoided meeting his father's eyes. The blond sat still in the dull light of his bedroom at the Barton residence; he looked up with guilt and regret ruling his emotions.

"What have I done?"

Alan suddenly was overwhelmed by emotions, the hurt of Rachel's death and having to suffer alone, the guilt of causing his family so much trouble by running away, and the string of broken promises he had made. Alan hurt, he wished he could cry and release the pain, but he couldn't get any release as they wouldn't fall. The last time he had cried he was being torn out of Rachel's arms by his father at the airport, which had been the last time he had ever seen her; that was over a decade ago.

The expensive watch sparkled in the light from the lamp on the bedside table; Alan was in a desperate need from the relief from his emotions. The usual trick may help Alan thought, but he wasn't sure if he could trust himself not to go see his father after doing it.

The blond waited a while before he placed the watch on his wrist and grabbed the card and then headed for the door. The silver Mercedes drove at speed out of the gates and on to the small secluded country roads. Alan looked down again at his wrist, before dialling a number of his cell phone.

Jeff Tracy sat waiting for his second youngest to return but he made sure there was only coffee in the cup before him, not anything stronger.

"Nice night?" Gordon Tracy had attempted to creep in and to go to bed without an interrogation about the nights events; he failed when he heard his father speak from the kitchen.

"Yeah, its was nice. Alan seemed okay… really good actually." Gordon was uncertain what details to reveal or not, he didn't want to upset his father.

"Good. I'm glad he's okay." Jeff took Gordon's unusually calm demeanour as a sign he felt guilty.

"Gordon Alan's issues are with me not you, I'm glad he wants to see you again." Jeff pointed to the adjacent chair that Gordon pulled out from under the table.

Gordon sat in silence for a moment before continuing, he felt his father deserved to know something of his son's new life.

"He seemed a lot more comfortable than before, maybe it is because he has no big brothers being over powering or something, I don't know. He seemed to have loads of energy, though I expected him to be shattered seen as though he has been so busy lately. He was really chatty and open, we talked about racing, the WASPS, girls."

Gordon smiled at the last bit, and Jeff rolled his eyes and decided it was best he didn't know about that.

"Did he go back to Barton's house?" Jeff knew the answer.

"He said he was going…err…well… home after he saw Ben James. Dad I'm sorry, I did say he could come home with me if he wanted too." Gordon felt for his father. Gordon remembered how Jeff couldn't cope around Alan when he was younger, and only now was Jeff realising how much of Alan's life he had missed.

The two sat for a long time in silence, both deep in thought.

"Go on get to bed." Jeff smirked as Gordon yawned loudly breaking the silence; Gordon nodded at his fathers directions and got up from the chair, but he turned back as his father spoke.

"Gordon I sent Alan his watch for his eighteenth birthday yesterday, he didn't happen to be wearing it did he?" Gordon saw a glimpse of hope in his father face, before it diminished by his answer.

"No, but…" Gordon started but this father cut him off with his hand in the air.

"It's alright Gordon, you don't have to explain." Jeff looked disappointed.

"Night dad." Gordon felt terrible; he was stuck in the middle.

As Gordon's shoes sounded against the marble stairs, the swimmer thought of his own watch and the details on his card. His watch had Aquarius engraved on it, and his letter had enclosed information that Aquarius is a constellation of the night sky, and was a life capsule for Apollo 13 crew. His letter had personal details related to Gordon about how his passion continued for the sea and water despite the damage it had caused him was admirable. His father commented on how his attitude and positive thinking was infectious and irreplaceable, and it made him smile everyday. Gordon smiled at the happy feelings he had every time he saw his watch, as he opened the door to his own bedroom and began to undress for bed. He truly hoped his father had opened up to Alan in his card about how he really felt.

After a long period of sitting in silence, Jeff moved his coffee cup to the sink and then turned to look out at the darkened gardens and pool that surrounded the house. Jeff felt he now had no hope left with Alan, he had lost his son and what was worse, lost him to Barton. As he went to leave the kitchen his cell phone rang on the wooden table, Jeff looked at the object before reluctantly answering it.

"Hello." Jeff was stunned by the voice he heard, and the emotion in it.

"Hi, it's Alan." It was said in distress, and panic.

"Alan!" Taking in Alan's voice Jeff continued. "Are you okay?" A troubled expression hung on his features.

"…I just needed to tell you that I didn't mean some of the things I did…I'm sorry. I didn't think you would forgive me. " Alan sentence was broken and regret and confusion was in every word.

"Alan it's alright, calm down. There's nothing I couldn't forgive you for." Jeff was concerned for Alan's distressed tone especially as he could hear an engine noise in the background.

"Are you driving? Just tell me where you are Alan I'll come and meet you."

"I'm on Victoria road …. I was coming to see you but Richard said I shouldn't and then…What the hell?" Alan never finished his sentence, and Jeff only heard the crunch of metal and a loud bang before the line when dead.

"Alan…" Jeff spoke, but only heard a monotone as a reply. Jeff ran from the house and sped down the gravel path in his own car desperate to find his son.

Alan Tracy lay slumped on the airbag steering wheel of the Mercedes the interior was filling with smoke from the fire, but he was not aware of it. As the blond breathed in more smoke the blood poured down his face onto his white shirt cuff, missing from under his shirt though was a white diamond watch.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Unconvincing Honesty and Abandoned Trust

Jeff Tracy sped through the night on his way to Alan's location; he had already called for an ambulance as he feared the worse, this was confirmed by the site of a smoking Mercedes. Jeff Tracy's Lexus skidded to a stop, as the driver ran out towards the burning wreak the door was open but no one was inside.

"Jeff." Jeff Tracy's attention left the car to find the location of the voice, confusion covered his mind followed by dread when he saw Richard Barton move to reveal his unconscious son.

"Alan…" Jeff Tracy ran the short distance to Richard and his son before dropping to the ground.

"What happened?" It was said breathlessly as Jeff struggled for a minute to take in his son's blood stained clothes and smoke damaged appearance.

"I just saw the car and I pulled him out, he's still breathing but I just can't get him to wake up." Richard spoke with terror as knelt on the ground behind Alan's back, his suit jacket was under Alan's head and his hands were covered in blood.

"Alan, Alan, wake up Alan…its dad can you hear me?" Jeff pulled off his own jacket and covered his son with it, to stop him going into shock. Jeff swallowed hard and tried to resume his control, Alan needed help.

"Alan, please speak to me, can you hear me." Richard spoke next to Alan's ear and gently pushed some golden hair off the boy's face, he was rewarded by Alan coughing violently and opening his eyes slightly.

Relief filled both billionaires, and Jeff quickly cast away the disappointment that Alan had woken for Richard but not for himself, as he flagged down the approaching ambulance.

Richard Barton concluded that whoever decided that a small beige badly painted room with four hard chair and some very old magazines, could be ever found to be relaxing to wait in should be shot. This room was far too small for the attitudes, past history and worry that these billionaires had at the moment. Richard had placed himself in one of the chairs, while Jeff was standing near the door, they had yet to make eye contact or speak since being directed in here by a doctor.

Jeff made the first remark as he looked over to a dirty and exhausted looking Richard.

"I want to know what happened." Jeff sounded venomous and the accusation he was making was clear to Richard.

"I told you, I was driving home and I found Alan unconscious in a burning car and I pulled him out, that's what happened and nothing else." Richard had the equal amount of anger and bitterness in his voice.

"So you just happened to find Alan in a burning car, that's convenient isn't it? If you had anything to do with this I swear I'll…" Jeff never finished that sentence because as he began to approach Barton a doctor entered the room. Both billionaires quickly forgot their rivalry.

"My son is he okay?" Jeff was impatient.

"He'll be fine in time, he has a bad concussion and some smoke inhalation, the most troubling thing is that he is struggling to regain consciousness, and is tending to drift in and out lot." The doctor noted the concerned looked on her patient's father's face.

"Were running tests so don't worry, we'll find out why. It's probably nothing serious. You can see him if you want he is in ward four room three." The doctor left the room confused, it wasn't every day she had two billionaires as patient visitors.

"Thank you doctor." Jeff moved to follow her out of the room, but paused and turned back to Barton.

"You're not seeing him so get out and stay out." Jeff spoke with austerity and directed his anger at the younger man who had just gotten up to follow him out of the room.

"I just want to see him Jeff. You know that Alan will want to see me anyway." Richard looked determined.

"Leave now, or I will get security to throw you out. You're not seeing Alan, and if I have anything to do with it you never will again" Jeff said no more, and turned to follow the doctor.

A troubled Jeff Tracy eyed his watch as he walked the sterile, silent corridors; it was just before three am. He had just called his other sons to inform them about the situation and they would be here soon. Both Alan and he needed the boys here, as he entered the dimly lit room Jeff caught his breath. Jeff remembered the other day he had thought Alan looked older than his age, at this moment he disagreed with that statement. The blond had a dressing on his arm and a large bruise on his head. Jeff also noted the blood on Alan's face had gone but a large cut could be seen under his hairline. The occupant of the bed was not at this moment a racing star, or billionaire's son who was standing up to his father, he was an eighteen year old kid who was hurt and Jeff's heart ached.

The elder Tracy moved to occupy the firm chair next to the teen's bed but never took his eyes off Alan's face. A large oxygen mask was covering his mouth and nose, and Alan's famous blue eyes were none closed. Jeff Tracy wasn't used to seeing Alan like this, all the defence mechanisms Alan used to fight back and hide his emotions by were gone, and he looked vulnerable.

"Alan." It was said in barely a whisper, as he reach out and placed his hand on Alan's, Jeff had half expected Alan to pull away as he usually would but he didn't move.

"Alan it's me, can you hear me?" Jeff stared at Alan; his body hunched over his son. He considered in that moment why he had replaced 'dad' with 'me' in that sentence, he was rewarded however when the blond murmured and moved.

"Alan, Alan can you hear me? Open your eyes." Jeff's voice was louder now, and he watched intensely as his son's eyes moved but in more of a way like he was having a terrible nightmare.

Jeff's head sank and met his neck, but he quickly raised it again as the door opened to reveal his sons. Jeff noted that Scott unlike the other three looked wide wake and not dishevelled in appearance, he hadn't been to sleep yet Jeff demised.

The eldest Tracy son quickly moved to Alan's bedside before speaking.

"Is he okay? What happened dad?" Scott sounded worried and ran his hand down his baby brother's face before resting it on Alan's hand.

"He's okay, a concussion and some smoke inhalation; he should be fine, he crashed his car." Jeff spoke exhaustedly as he stood and embraced his three other sons in individual hugs.

"Why isn't he awake yet?" Gordon asked concerned as he sat down with Virgil on the end of Alan's bed.

"They don't know yet they're running a blood sample, he has been drifting in and out of consciousness but his words are jumbled and incoherent most of the time." Jeff felt totally exhausted; the last few months were catching up on him.

As Jeff sat down again Alan's doctor entered with an unsettling look on her face, and none of the Tracy boys liked her expression.

"Mr Tracy can I have a word with you about your son?" If Jeff knew one thing about doctor's relating news to families it was that this was not a good sign, and so was determined as he met Scott's anxious eyes that he wanted to stay with Alan.

"You can tell me with my son's present doctor, what's wrong?" Jeff sounded impatient.

"Before the crash do you know what Alan had been doing?" Jeff looked puzzled by the question and looked at Gordon.

"He was out not long before with my son." The doctor adjusted her eyes to meet who the elder Tracy was talking about; her eyes saw a worried copper haired young man.

"Did you notice anything unusual about his behaviour when you saw your brother?" Gordon's expression matched his other family members in curiosity.

"No, he was fine. I don't understand he had a car crash after I met up with him. Why would he be acting unusually beforehand?" Scott Tracy was getting annoyed, he decided to butt in.

"Where are you going with this? What does this have to do with Alan not waking up?" Virgil shot him a warning glare at his tone and intensity of it.

"I'm sorry Mr Tracy, it's just that Alan's injuries shouldn't have caused some of his symptoms, and from speaking to the police I am surprised he crashed at all, as I believe your brother is a professional driver. So I took blood from him and this explains both his condition and why he crashed." The young brown haired women looked back to focus her attention on the senior Tracy.

"Mr Tracy how long has Alan been taking recreational drugs?" The doctor looked up and saw disbelief in the eyes of Jeff Tracy, as he shook his head slowly before looking at Alan.

Scott Tracy stared at the doctor and back at Alan before speaking breathlessly.

"Drugs…no…you have got this wrong; my little brother doesn't take drugs." Scott spoke with passion and forcefulness, he looked around to his father who had his focus only on Alan and looked distraught.

"I found traces of amphetamines in his blood; this is why he hasn't woken yet he seemed to have a react badly to them."

Marie decided again she hated this part of her job, she scanned each of the faces in the room after she spoke and felt regret in having to tell this information. A blond young man looked deeply troubled and has hand on his father's shoulder, while the redhead and a brown haired young man shared utter looks of uncertainty and sorrow. The room was silent, so she spoke again.

"I believe that tonight Alan had taken the drug commonly known as speed." As she spoke the two eldest Tracy's in the room exhaled in disbelief, and Jeff Tracy got up and moved towards the window.

"Speed, you'd think he have enough of that on the race track." Scott sounded totally disappointed as he refused to look at his youngest brother now.

"What happens now, will he be okay?" It was the conscious blond who spoke, and Kate noticed he didn't sound disappointed in the new information and was more concerned if his brother would recover.

"Well these drugs are illegal due to the state they put the person in, but hopeful he won't have any side effects. Speed is usually taken to make you push your boundaries, to keep up high spirits and energy levels. It's very much like ecstasy; people take it as they want to feel better and free from restraints around them. He should recover with no lasting damage done if this is a one off occasion."

The doctor had no idea how that description had made Jeff Tracy feel, he was totally crushed. Jeff turned back around to face his sons as the doctor exited the room, before him four faces looked amazed but deeply alarmed.

"I don't believe this." Virgil still spoke with a breathless whisper as Gordon extended his arm around his shoulders, but Jeff saw it as something else.

"Gordon" All eyes focused on Gordon as his father spoke and Gordon turned to see his dad.

"Did Alan take drugs when he was with you?" His father tried not to accuse his second youngest of anything, but Gordon looked like he took offence as his amber eyes narrowed in menace.

"Dad do you really think I would let my kid brother take drugs? When he was with me he was fine, he wasn't high or drunk or anything, he was fine." Gordon hammered that comment home as Gordon noted Scott's accusing face.

"Don't cover for him Gordon, look where it has landed Alan." Scott pointed to his youngest brother but didn't look at him.

Gordon stood up and let go of Virgil as he stared angrily at his eldest brother, the tension in the room was intense. "I am not lying; Alan was fine when he was with me, if Alan took drugs it was after I left him."

John Tracy had had enough, this situation was getting too much for a hospital room discussion and they would probably be thrown out if they didn't stop bellowing at each other soon.

"Alright! Stop yelling all of you. Gordon if you say Alan was fine with you then we believe you." John moved to put his arm around his younger brother, and shot a glance at Scott as he emphasised the word 'we'.

"So if he didn't take drugs with you then who did he take them…" Scott got no more out as his father moved swiftly towards the door with a look of murderous look on his face.

"Dad…" Virgil got up to question his father's intentions but was ignored; Scott answered his query to where his father was going.

"Barton! Stay here the all of you." Scott Tracy spoke the words with malice and he ran out after his father, leaving three confused brothers.

Just as his eldest brother left, a confused and pain ridden Alan Tracy opened his eyes to see three of his brothers staring above him.

"Dad, wait." Scott Tracy called down the stair way after his father, at this early time the hospital was still deserted.

"He did this Scott he gave Alan drugs, I'm going to kill him." Jeff stopped and turned to face his eldest who was a few steps behind him. His voice was dripping in anger and hatred, Jeff's appearance was fatigued and varying emotions covered his face.

"I know okay, but you don't even know where Barton is at the minute Alan needs you here. Dad if he wakes up and your not here we're never going to be able to make any progress with him to get him away from Barton, Dad Alan needs you here."

Scott desperately wanted to hunt Barton down and let his fists do the talking, but maybe all that time with Virgil was rubbing off on him. It was either that, or Scott decided a more likely explanation was, that he wanted to be the first to punch Barton for this.

Jeff raised his head and Scott saw raw emotions of pain and disbelief in the eyes of his father.

"What have I done Scott?" The eldest Tracy sank onto the step below him and his son joined him.

"What do you mean?" The lack of sleep and worry was making Scott feel totally wiped out.

"What if Alan has taken them himself Scott? What if my eighteen year old son is taking drugs to forget about what has happening in his life, to forget about me and all the troubles we have. I want to blame Barton for this so much, but the idea terrifies me that Alan took these drugs by his own decision and if he has, what am I going to do?" Jeff spoke with complete ambiguity and desolation.

Scott Tracy had no answer, as this was also his greatest worry. What if Alan had moved from trying to physical get away from his problems to emotional and mentally erasing them?

"Virgil…" Alan heard his own croaky voice, and swallowed hard. Confusion swilled in his mind and he felt truly terrible, this was indicated to his brothers by Alan's actions in moving his hand to his head.

"It's alright Alan you're in hospital but you're going to be okay." Virgil held the hand that his brother had raised to his head, but saw complete confusion in the blue eyes before him.

"Hospital, why?" Alan only now remembered the presence his other two brothers.

"You had a car crash." Gordon tried to sound neutral in his voice tone, and left the details only at that. As the youngest looked at his fair haired brother, Alan knew there was something more, John looked at him with disappointment written all over his face.

Alan was interrupted by his thoughts by his brother and father entering the room. As soon as Alan saw the face of his father, he knew that the something more too why he was here meant trouble for him.

"If I just had a car crash then why the hell are you lot standing over me looking like you want to kill me?" Alan shifted his gaze rapidly from his father's eyes and never met any of his brothers either; he felt he was being judged without any reason.

Jeff and Scott had heard Alan's question as they entered the room, relief filled their veins but it was replaced quickly by something else in Jeff's case, despair. When Alan had met Jeff's eyes, he saw something for an instant before Alan raised his defensives; it was guilt.

"Alan, are you okay?" It was Scott who spoke, but Alan noticed the lack of sympathy in his voice, it was said more to confirm the evidence.

"I'd feel better if you all stop staring at me and you just tell me why I'm here." It was said coldly, as the blond pulled himself up, with difficultly, into a sitting position.

"Boys will you give Alan and I a few minutes alone to talk please." Jeff moved to re take his previous position near the window a few feet from Alan's bed while his sons considered his request.

Gordon swiftly got to his feet and left the room he didn't want to hear anymore, he couldn't. John moved and encouraged Virgil up from the bed with a head tilt towards the door, but the eldest Tracy son only moved only to sit in the chair next to Alan.

Alan looked completely perplexed by the situation happening around him. He was still exhausted and in pain from his injuries so he doubted that he also could also get up and leave, despite desperately wanting too.

Jeff turned around after he heard the door close to face his son, but was met also by his eldest.

"Scott that included you." Jeff sounded slightly frustrated.

"No it didn't." Scott looked at his father in a determined manner he wasn't moving, and Jeff was slightly relieved by that. Both there attentions turned back to Alan when he coughed and held his chest.

"What's going on? The last thing I remember was leaving Gordon and going home, how did I get here?" Alan sounded irritated by his lack of knowledge, and was still struggling to breathe easily.

"You don't remember anything after that?" Alan looked at his father with confusion on his features; Jeff only looked more troubled and shared a glance with Scott.

The dark haired Tracy moved the oxygen mask back over Alan's face while Alan breathed deeply from it after speaking.

"No. Virgil said something about a car crash." Alan looked unconvinced at the idea of that happening.

"Yep you crashed and so you're in hospital." Scott left it there; he wanted to see if Alan showed signs of guilt or secrecy, he saw none.

"I crashed my car?" Alan met his brother's eyes and saw such disappointment staring back at him, the look totally confused him.

"Yeah, taking drugs and then going for a joy ride often does that." Scott yelled crossly at the blond before him, but Alan only returned a face of incredulity.

"Why did you take speed Alan?" The voice came from his father and Alan looked across at him to see a look of total loathing and displeasure on his father's face.

"What…what are you talking about?" Alan's chest hurt as he spoke, and the cold looks his father and brother were giving him made him feel no better.

"You think… that I took drugs?" Alan looked back between his family members with his eyes wide and mouth slightly a jar.

"No. We know you took drugs Alan so just don't lie about it, just tell us the truth for once Alan." Scott pleased as he got up from the bed, he needed to get rid of the excess energy and stress so started pacing before the bed.

"I don't…and didn't take drugs. I told you, I don't remember anything after getting home and I don't even remember going out in the car again." Alan shouted back causing him a cough and take in more fresh oxygen.

"So let's look at this Alan. You spent the evening in a club you shouldn't have been in, you don't remember anything that happened, you crashed your car, and we have a blood sample that confirms you had amphetamines in your system. It isn't exactly looking good for you, so stop lying!"

Scott stopped and stared at his brother from the middle of the bed; he was fuming with anger and was yelling loudly, Jeff Tracy decided this wasn't helping anyone.

Jeff Tracy approached his eldest and put his hand on his shoulder before whispering in Scott's ear, the eldest stared back at his youngest brother before leaving the room.

Jeff Tracy stood where his son had been, as Alan looked back towards his father both eyes met.

"I haven't taken drugs. I don't know why I crashed, but I didn't take anything." Alan took the defiant approach and never broke eye contact with his father before he sighed, and shook his head.

"You don't believe a word I'm saying do you?" Jeff broke eye contact and sat in the chair next to Alan's bed. Alan took in his father's appearance, he looked totally exhausted he had blood on his shirt and mud on his trousers and Alan questioned why.

"Were you there when I crashed?" Jeff held his head in his hands and rubbed them over his face before answering.

"Alan, you called me whilst you were driving you told me where you were and that you were coming to see me." Jeff saw Alan had no recollection of the event by his confused attitude.

"Alan you were upset and apprehensive, and you said you rang to tell me you were sorry." Jeff spoke slowly, everything was pointing to one thing and he hated to admit it.

"Have things gotten that bad Alan that you decided to take drugs? You should have come to me, do have any idea what could have happened to you, you could have died." Jeff voice got louder with every word and fury seeps from his eyes on to his son.

"Alan I saw you covered in blood, barely breathing next to a flaming car, this wasn't a slight bump Alan you must have been driving out of control. When you rang me Alan you were distressed and anxious." Alan's eyes met his father again.

"You just can't believe me can you, I didn't take drugs whether I remember what happened or not." Alan spat angrily, he hid the resentment from his eyes.

Jeff looked at Alan; he struggled with the next words he knew he had to say.

"No Alan I don't believe you. I saw you in Barton arms unconscious, and that's a fact Alan." Jeff raised his head and met blue eyes which shone with bitterness and pain. Alan looked too young to hold that much hostility Jeff thought, especially as it was all aimed at him.

"Rick was there?" Alan mellowed a little with this information.

"Yes, he pulled you out of the car…why…?" Jeff looked confused at Alan hopefulness.

"Did he give you drugs Alan, is that his hold over you." The softness had gone, anger and hatred dominated Jeff's voice as he stared at Alan.

"No, god why can't you believe me I didn't take speed, and Rick sure as hell didn't give me any. I can't believe I'm hearing this. You can either believe me or not, but if you don't I'm never going to forgive you for this."

Jeff's head bowed before meeting Alan's eyes, Jeff didn't believe him, Alan returned the hatred look and pulled back the blankets and unattached his drip and monitors.

"I'm leaving; get the hell out of my way." Alan spat.

"You're not going anywhere Alan, especially not with him. You're staying with me." Jeff grabbed his sons' shoulders before he could get up and Alan struggled with the swift movement and felt complete disorientation because of it.

"Dad." The voice came from a troubled looking John, who stood at the now open door with two police officers behind him.

"The police want a word with you." John spoke, while he considered the scene before him, his father seemed to have a strong grip on Alan, while Alan seemed in pain.

"Sure… let them in." Jeff let go of him son and stood up, as two police officers entered the room.

"Mr Tracy, we actually are going to have to ask you both a few questions separately, can you step outside sir?" The older police officer indicated to the door as Jeff's other three sons appeared.

"Boys, stay here with Alan." Alan exhaled at his father's request, as Jeff followed the officers out of the door.

"What does he think I'm going to go raid the drug cabinet for my next fix if he leaves me on my own?" Alan spat sarcastically as he noticed Scott looked no less annoyed than before.

"Alan why did you take drugs? Why didn't you talk to me or any of us?" Yep Scott was still as pissed off as before Alan decided.

"Do you know what Scott, I don't want to talk to you because you never listen to a word I say, even now you don't believe me, and you're siding with dad again?" Not many people would yell at Scott Tracy when he was this angry but Alan had no problem doing it.

"Alan calm down and Scott stop yelling at him, he has just been unconscious don't forget." Gordon tried to ease the situation and sat down next to his baby brother and Alan smiled at him for the support.

"Thanks Gordon, it's nice to know I have one brother who isn't stabbing me in the back." Alan glared at John and Scott; both were always in favour of Jeff in Alan's eyes.

"Alan." Gordon turned to face his brother uncertainty and suspicion lined his eyes and face, and Alan saw it.

"You do believe me don't you Gordon?" Alan barely whispered it to his closest brother, and hopefulness was seen in Alan eyes. The pleading look cleared fast as disappointment grew, Alan had found his answer when Gordon didn't meet his eyes or answer his question.

"I don't believe this…Virgil?" Alan looked innocently at his second eldest brother, who was praying not to have to make this choice.

"Alan look at all the evidence, it's stacked up against you. Listen Alan we all just want you to get better so that you can come home and then everything will be fine, we can go back to normal." The four brothers saw the look of rejection after Virgil's words, and Scott felt it hurt the most, he desperately wanted to hug his brother and end these problems.

"You know I wish all of you would just stay out of my life, I hate you all." Alan got up out of bed and moved into the bathroom next to the window, slamming the door behind him in frustration.

Richard Barton pushed open the doors to the ward before him; he had just given a statement to the police about Alan's crash and was now on his way to see Alan.

Jeff Tracy saw Richard Barton approaching from down the corridor as the police moved away after completing their questions; he had asked them to question Alan later. The younger business man had changed from last time he saw him, and was now dressed more casually in jeans, a jacket, and a black jumper. Jeff shook his head and started towards the approaching man.

"I want to see him Jeff and I'm not leaving until I have." It was a demand not a request Jeff noted. As the two men met Jeff indicated for them to go into an empty hospital room similar to the one Alan was in. Jeff shut the door after Richard had entered and turned and snatched hold of the billionaire's jacket, and pushed him against the wall.

"What the hell are you doing?" Richard tried to push the elder man off him but Jeff had a tight trip and looked furious.

"Did you give Alan drugs?" Jeff noted the confusion on Barton's face, and questioned its honesty.

"Drugs, what drugs? Jeff let go." Jeff did loosen his grip of the man in front of him but stood barely a foot away from him, not letting the man move.

"Alan crashed because he had taken drugs; you saw the car he must have been driving like crazy. He called me while he was driving saying he was sorry and that he wanted to see me, his emotions with chaotic." Richard truly was amazed by this information.

"Alan wouldn't take drugs, are you sure it was drugs in his system?" Barton sounded confident as he shot Jeff a questioning glance.

"Yes, they have a blood sample, it was speed. Alan could go to jail for driving dangerously and under the influence of drugs, so I want to know where he got them from?" Jeff suspected him and Richard knew it.

"I haven't given Alan drugs Jeff and I never would. I care about Alan; do you think I want him taking that crap?" Jeff looked annoyed.

"Do you really want to know what I think? I think I want to know the real reasons behind your interest in Alan, because I know it isn't to help him. If I find out you gave Alan drugs I swear I will make you regret it." Richard shook his head at Jeff's words before considering what he had learnt, to him it just didn't add up right.

"Did Alan admit to taking speed?" Richard looked up and Jeff met his eyes, he hoped the answer was no.

"No. He say's he didn't take anything, and he has no recollection of the crash or even driving the car." Jeff watched the younger man with interest as Richard moved closer to him.

"You know what Jeff, its not really any surprise Alan can't stand being with you; you just don't trust him do you. If Alan says he hasn't taken drugs then I believe him."

Richard spoke with his assurances safe with Alan's honesty, Jeff moved away from Richard towards the window as he spoke.

"You saw the car, Alan didn't just hit a bump and fly off, and the car was alight with flames." Jeff looked at the evidence before him not one piece supported Alan's fragmented story.

"I don't care if all the evidence finds Alan a hundred percent guilty. I believe what he says; it's supposed to be part of being a father. However I can see how that must be difficult for you as you don't even know if Alan still holds you in that role do you?" Richard approached Jeff as the elder billionaire turned around after hearing those words.

"What's that suppose to mean?" Jeff blood was boiling with emotion.

"When was the last time Alan called you 'dad' Jeff? I've never heard him say it to you, or even when speaking about you." Jeff's response was captivating to Richard, as Jeff seemed to be tracing back memories with no evidence to contradict Richard's statement.

"Wow, has it been that long. What does it really say about you if your own child doesn't want to call you dad?" The smirk that covered Barton's face snapped Jeff out of his mindset.

"Get out. I don't want you near my boys, and I sure as hell won't let you see Alan." Jeff started towards the door.

"I will leave Jeff, once I get Alan." Jeff re-closed the door he had just opened, and spun around.

"Are you kidding me? You think I am going to let you walk out with my son, and even worse after he has just taken drugs that he probably got from you. Your crazy, think again." However Richard smiled callously.

"You will let Alan come home with me, or I will tell those officers that the rumours are true that did you assault your son when he was a minor. Alan was seventeen when you hit him Jeff, and that's classed as child abuse in this state and I'm not sure that would go down well with the children's charity, or the public, or the police." Barton had a venomous look in his eyes.

"I doubt you want that to happen right? As when you look into Alan's past as an outsider it doesn't reflect well on you. Do you even remember all those incidents when Alan was injured when you should have been looking after him? Like the time he nearly drowned just after Rachel died, you left him unsupervised and he slipped in the pool and hit his head. Then there was the time he got meningitis and you didn't notice and it nearly killed him, or the countless times he has been expelled or has run away from school. It paints of an unhappy, endangered child and an uncaring unfit father."

"Those are just incidents that happened by accident; I would never hurt Alan on purpose!" Jeff looked with shock at the information Barton was twisting and changing.

"Oh don't worry, I believe you Jeff, but do you want to take that chance in court with a jury and ask their opinion on whether you abused your son? Or are you just going to let Alan leave with me and we can leave all that in the past."

"You're blackmailing me to get my son?" Jeff stood inches from his competitor who was smirking with pleasure.

"No, no. I'm just letting you choose what happens next. Of course if you think Alan won't confirm to the police that you assaulted him now that you have just accused him of being a drug addict and a liar, please call my bluff." Richard knew he had Jeff in a corner; he headed for the door, but stopped before fully exiting the room just letting him have the final blow.

"By the way Jeff just to make you feel better, I can remember when Alan last called me dad." Richard smiled as he left.

Jeff Tracy stood leaning against the cold wall with his head tilted back in the now dark room. He had never felt so out of control, so helpless; he wanted this nightmare to end.

"Lucy I really need you." He whispered with despair and distress.

Alan appeared from the bathroom in pain still, but dressed in his previous clothing that itself however got the attention of his brothers as he moved in the direction of the door.

"Alan there is no chance in hell you're leaving so get back in bed, now." Alan hadn't actually heard Scott sound quite so intimating or strict before but he ignored him and adjusted his path to go behind his brother.

"Alan!" Scott reached for Alan's wrist but let go swiftly as his brother hissed in pain at the touch and eyed him with frustration.

"Alan are you okay?" Alan turned back around as he recognised the voice from the doorway and relief filled his veins as he moved the few feet towards Richard and into his embrace.

Richard held his arms around Alan in an embrace as he looked over the young man's shoulders into the room that contained some pissed off looking Tracy brothers.

"Get off him, he isn't going anywhere with you." It came from the shorted lighter hair version of Scott, but in the form of Virgil Tracy.

"Well Alan seems to be disagreeing with you on that point Virgil." Richard spoke serenely and without raising his voice, as Alan slightly released his embrace, though Richard kept an arm around Alan's shoulders.

"Were leaving." Alan spoke to Richard as he tried to step away from the room.

"I told you your going nowhere with him." Scott moved and blocked Alan's path, Scott's confident cobalt eyes met Alan's resenting cerulean eyes.

"Scott let him go." Everyone turned at hearing that to see Jeff Tracy who stood further down the corridor. Alan met his father's eyes, and for the first time Alan saw the pain he was causing and he shivered internally with guilt.

"Scott." Alan spoke quietly and with no hatred or anger that was present just moments ago. Scott looked at his brother surprised by his un-emotional tone, before he moved out of the way and let Alan leave while being supported by Richard Barton embrace.

John Tracy moved to hold his father; he hadn't seen Jeff so troubled or upset since his mother died. As he scanned his brother's faces he knew one thing, they were losing another family member, but this time it was to a dangerous enemy.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Dark Dealings and History's Heartache

Alan Tracy coughed hard and held his chest with pain; Richard looked over at the blond with concern from the driver's seat.

"You okay?" Richard asked before returning his eyes to the road.

"Fantastic, why wouldn't I be? It's not like I have just nearly burned to death in a car and mysteriously lost about seven hours of my memory. Then at some point been dosed up with speed by god knows who, oh and then been accused by my now ex-family of being a drug addict and a liar." Alan knew his rant was badly placed, as Richard wasn't responsible for how he was feeling, but Alan had been truly crushed by his father and brothers betrayal.

"Sorry." Alan rubbed his hands through his hair but hissed as they hit his stitched up injury.

"Don't apologise this isn't your fault Alan." Richard looked again at the young man; his eyes showed his pain, and his now pale complexion indicated his ill health.

"Well you're the only one who thinks that then. I doubt Jeff said this to you so I'm going too, thank you for saving my life." Alan paused and looked at the driver with appreciation as Alan noted they were home.

"What is it?" Richard analysed Alan's pause.

"Rick you do believe me don't you that I didn't take drugs?" Richard stopped the car outside his house and turned to face Alan.

"Of course I believe you, I always will be on your side Alan, trust me. I'm going to find out who gave you drugs and I'm going to make them pay for it I promise. No one hurts you and gets away with it, and that includes Jeff Tracy." Alan felt comforted by the anger in Richard's voice and Alan knew he would keep that promise.

"Alan I know you can't talk to Jeff but you can talk to me, tell me what really wrong." Richard examined the young man for who he cared for so much, as he seemed to be struggling with his emotions.

"They didn't believe me." Alan's voice cracked slightly.

"Not a single one of them and they're my brothers, and what really twists the knife that they stabbed in my back, is that if it was happening to one of them no one would ever question their honesty." Alan swallowed his emotions he would have never opened up to any of his family about this; Richard continued to sit in silence for a long time before Alan again spoke.

"I love them so much their my brothers, whether it was John letting me help him build a rocket when I was six, or Virgil letting me paint a terrible take on Picasso. All of them looked after me when I was little. Even after Rachel died and I lost everything, Gordon would be the one to play pranks with me in the holidays off from boarding school. He was even the one who taught me to swim, when no one else could even get me in the water. When we all had to separate when they went to NASA or the WASPS or wherever, I knew we wouldn't be as close anymore, but I thought we would always be there for each other no matter what." Alan looked forward out of the windshield at the garages and gardens surrounding the driveway.

"You didn't mention Scott." Richard eyes matched Alan's view.

"That's because you didn't see the way he looked at me. When I was little Scott was my idol, he would play model racing with me whenever he could, let me wash his car, and even once drive it. He and I had a relationship like no other; he was so protective, so caring. He even made me feel like Jeff cared even though he never showed it, but now it's gone. Every time I caused trouble at school, got expelled or ran away, he would get mad at me but part of him could understand why I had done it. Today there was no protective big brother, no caring brother, no understanding; he looked at me like he was ashamed of me." Richard placed his hand on Alan's shoulder and made him face him.

"Hey, you haven't done anything to be ashamed of Alan and your brothers still love you." Alan looked relieved just by that idea.

"I don't know what its like to be a brother, but in the last months Alan you have let me know what it's like to have a family. No matter what you could or have done Alan I will always be here for you." Alan looked directly at Richard; he loved the openness he and Richard had in their relationship.

"You have been fantastic with me, I feel like your son, but did you never think of having a son of your own?" Alan pondered as Richard's eyes turned darker and more secretive.

"I lost that opportunity a long time ago when I was young, but luckily for me I got a second chance at having a son when I found you; Alan you have no idea how I feel about you."

Richard put his arm around Alan's shoulder and pulled him closer as his brown eyes reflected his enjoyment of this opportunity, Alan was interested though by the hint into Richard's past but decided not to pry further.

"Now lets get you upstairs to bed we can talk about what you remember later, I'm having your car examined by specialists that should tell us more about what happened. I'm also getting the CCTV tapes at the club to see who gave you the drugs and how. We will find out what happened so don't worry about it, I want you to get some rest."

Alan half smiled as Richard got out of the car; Alan followed but then groaned as his body ached. Alan swayed but Richard caught him and looked concerned as Alan looked up at him with disorientation.

"Come on, just because I broke you out of hospital doesn't mean that I don't think that you shouldn't be in bed." Alan didn't disagree as Richard held and directed him in to the house and straight up to own bedroom.

Richard Barton looked deeply troubled by the past hours events. He was sat up next to Alan who he had just helped get changed and into bed, the blond was just beginning to fall asleep but it didn't look a peaceful slumber.

"Alan…come on son, calm down…your safe with me." Richard lent over and spoke quietly to the young man, Alan responded by half opening his eyes.

"Rachel." Alan mumbled as sleep took hold of him again.

Richard smiled sadly at Alan's words.

"Sshh, I'll be watching you sleep." Richard looked down again at the sleeping soul before brushing some hair off Alan's face. Richard moved off the bed and took out his cell phone, he had a group of private investigators trying to find the answers both he and Alan wanted but he was getting impatient.

"Dad you should go to bed for a bit you look exhausted." John looked at his father as he stood leaning against the kitchen work surface staring out at the garden.

"Thanks John but I can sleep later; I have too much on my mind to possibly think about sleep now." Jeff turned and took in his four sons before him.

"That doesn't mean that you lot shouldn't get some rest though." Jeff looked grateful as Virgil handed him a cup of coffee.

"No, what we need is to go get Alan from that bastard." Scott looked at his father with the same amount of disbelief as he had after Alan had left the hospital.

"What do you want me to do Scott? Beg him to come home, kidnap him and then lock him in his room. I have tried all that and it didn't work. Anyway if I go round there and try and drag Alan away from Barton, it could cause even more trouble for us." Jeff rubbed his eyes and took a seat at the table. Jeff sat and looked up to where Gordon was standing looking troubled is reflection shown beside him full height glass doors.

"What more trouble could he cause dad? Alan has run away for months, spread lies to the media about this family, taken drugs, caused a car crash, oh and completely denied it all." Scott yelled as he moved across towards the fridge and took out the juice carton and swallowed a few mouthfuls.

Jeff watched his son's visible venting of his frustration and saw the same thing in Virgil's eyes, who was now seated next to him. Jeff knew hiding information from his sons would get them nowhere, he just felt ashamed of the hold Barton now had over him in relation to Alan.

"Barton blackmailed me in to letting Alan leave with him." All this sons turned to face him as he spoke with anger, at himself more than anyone else.

"Barton said that if I didn't let him leave with Alan then he would get Alan to press charges against me of assault. Barton was obsessed with your mom, and now he has moved that obsession on to Alan. He has been interested in Alan for years; he knows everything about Alan and his past. With Alan background of running away, getting in trouble and being hurt, if the media get involved there is going to be a lot of evidence against me that isn't in a good light." Jeff looked down at the table as he spoke, but his head was raised as Scott slammed the carton down on to the marble kitchen tops.

"Alan wouldn't press charges against you dad…would he?" Gordon spoke and looked at his father for the answer to his query, but Jeff looked uneasy by the answer he believed was likely.

"I don't know Gordon, it wouldn't matter anyway. If Barton puts the press or the police on the trail of Alan's past it is only going to support the idea that I'm the bad guy, and with allegations that I have hurt Alan will destroy everything." Jeff spoke with no emotion, and his sons showed looked horrified by the idea.

"I don't understand, you have never hurt Alan on purpose dad, last year was an isolated mistake that's obvious." John moved to sit on the other side of his father and placed his hand on his father's shoulder.

"To you maybe John, but people tend to go for the big picture and if it comes out that Alan got hit by a car when he was running away from me, people are going to wonder why he was running from me. Issues like this stick in peoples mind and I don't want the police or the media anywhere near this family, I won't put all of you and Alan through that. The only hope I have to get Alan back is to make him see what Barton's really like." Jeff looked determined on that point.

"To do that we need to find out what happened last night, either someone gave Alan speed without his knowledge or he took it himself, either way we need to know which is true." Virgil looked between his father and Scott; both looked equally as disturbed by both thoughts.

"For Alan to not know that someone had given him drugs they would have had to have had spiked his drink, and it would have had to have been in a drink he had after Gordon left otherwise the affect would have shown." John looked puzzled by Virgil's medical explanation.

"Gordon where did Alan go after you left him?" Virgil asked as the red head turned around, his usual chirpy demeanour was absent.

"Upstairs, he said he was going to see Ben James before he left to go home." Gordon spoke casually; he was hurt by Alan's remarks back at the hospital he hoped Alan would never look at him like that again.

Jeff Tracy shook his head as his son choice the unfortunate term of 'home' to indicate Alan's destination.

"Dad that's a high class private club Alan was at anything could have gone on. We need to find out what goes on in the there, if we do that I bet we can find evidence against Barton so we can do a little blackmailing of are own." Scott spoke with an edge of revenge and Jeff and Virgil both shared a glance when they heard it.

"It doesn't make any sense; this isn't some standard night club we were in. Everyone there is loaded with money and status and that's what gets you through the door, not an ID. Alan had this card and from what I can tell one swipe of that through the machine on the way in tell the staff what privileges and benefits you get. We didn't pay for a single drink or be bothered by anyone; we were just on the private tables over looking the small dance floor. Alan didn't have contact with anyone apart from me." Gordon just looked confused by the entire situation.

"How did Alan get into a private club like that?" John pondered.

"Ben James owns chains of these types of clubs in all of the major cities, and Alan's connected with both James and Barton. The staff clearly knew who Alan was and who he was connected too, no one would risk spiking Alan's drink knowing that. Something must have happened when Alan when upstairs." Gordon was cautious with his words; he purposely hadn't chosen to say Barton and James were Alan's 'friends'.

"We need to find out what happens in there and who can have access." Scott moved away from the sideboards and looked at the clock.

"How are we going to do that Scott?" Virgil also got up from his chair and stared at his brother waiting for an answer.

"We can go to the club, Gordon you better also come with me and Virgil, we can go tonight and try and find out what is happening in there." Neither of his brothers looked sure by the idea and turned to see their father's opinion.

"This might be the only way but I want you boys to be careful and to keep me informed, I don't want any of you getting hurt. It's two o'clock now, let's all try and get some sleep then you three can go out to the club. John will you call Peter later and see if he's okay, I haven't spoken to him today I wanted to check he was okay in the apartment last night." Jeff felt slightly better by the idea they were doing something, and he even felt he could get a few hours sleep. Jeff placed his cup in the sink as Scott eyed him with interest.

"Why were at the club and John is here with Peter, where are you going?" Scott knew the answer by the look on his father's face. Jeff moved across the red oak floor and was approaching the door as he turned back and spoke.

"I need to check how he is Scott; I'm going to see him later on. Now go to bed all of you." It was an order, but it wasn't said with the force that the boys were used too when there father told them to do something, a sign Jeff was fatigued.

Richard Barton looked to his left as a slow moving Alan Tracy entered the kitchen, yawning and stretching as he attempted to sit on the tall stools.

"What are you doing out of bed? I only left you for a minute; I just wanted to make something for you to eat." Richard moved away from the sandwich he had been preparing to approach Alan at the table.

"I feel a bit better now, my back and fingers are sore but apart from that I feel okay…ish." Alan looked at Richard before he moved his gaze over to the other side of the kitchen at the sandwich he had been making.

"Well if you're hungry I suppose that's a good sign at least." Richard felt Alan's forehead before he moved back the way he had come to get the meal.

"Can I get you anything else?" Richard sat in the chair beside Alan as he put down the plate; he still had concern written all over his face.

"Rick I'm fine, it was a car crash, it happens at work all the time." Alan spoke between chewing and smiled at his joke.

"Did you find anything out about who drugged me?" Alan eyes clouded and laugher vanished, as he again tried to recall the events of the evening.

"Not yet, but I will." Richard picked up his cell phone as it rang, but Alan noted he pressed the cancel button.

"Who was on the phone?" Alan indicated to the object which was again making noises.

"It's just my assistant I had a meeting that all…it doesn't matter, you matter to me." Richard again sent the call away and looked back at the blond boy who looked guilty.

"There was something I was meaning to ask you, how did you find me so fast after I crashed I thought you were having a business meal?" Alan queried.

"I left early, it was just lucky I suppose that I was driving home when I did and that I found you." Richard smiled, the reasons behind his meetings and calls was something he didn't want to bother Alan with.

"Why don't you go to the office now, do some work while it's quiet there, I'll be fine here. I don't like feeling like I've gotten in the way of your work." Alan finished half of his meal and picked up Richards cell phone and handed it to him.

"I'm not leaving you after you have just been in hospital Alan." Richard placed his cell phone back onto the table and stared at the blond.

"Rick I'm fine, I'll probably just go back to bed and take some of those knock out tablets the doctor gave me, so please go to work. Anyway everyone will be leaving the office now so you can get loads done. I'll be fine, I promise." Alan spoke firmly as he collected Richard's phone and keys and encouraged with his hand on the billionaire back to leave the room.

"Okay, okay, I'll go for a few hours but that's all. I'll be in my office doing paperwork so if you need anything call me and I'll be right here." Richard held his hands up in mock surrender and took his belonging from Alan and headed towards the front door.

Alan smiled as he saw Richard pull on his winter coat over his jumper, in all honesty he hadn't been feeling as well as he had suggested, but he didn't want to burden Richard anymore.

"Have those baby blues ever not gotten you anything?" Richard smiled as he looked back at Alan standing by the stairs; he knew he had given in with his usual ease to Alan's requests.

"Actually yes… they…never work on Jeff." Alan dipped his head a little at that confession, and Richard felt a shiver of irritation go down his spine.

"Bye." Alan smiled before turning and gingerly walked up the stairs at a steady pace.

Richard considered again whether to leave Alan, but got his answer when Alan shouted from the level above.

"Go to work." Richard rolled his eyes and smirked as he grabbed his briefcase and left the house.

Alan Tracy had watched an hour or so of TV and managed a quick unsteady shower before he heard a car on the drive; he moaned in annoyance but still appreciated the concern. To himself at least he had to admit he was exhausted, his body and especially his head still ached from the force of the crash. Also the doctor he had seen informed him the after effects of the drug would stay around for a while, so Alan had taken all the sleeping tablets and pain relieve he could get. The blond rubbed his back as he slowly moved down the stairs as Alan opened the door he spoke with sarcasm.

"I thought you were going to work?" Alan turned his smirk that he spoke with into a surprised look at the person in front of him.

"You're not expecting me then." Jeff spoke as he saw Alan's surprise at his visit. Jeff noticed the signs of exhaustion and pain in Alan's face and the way he was holding himself was an indication of his son's health, and he didn't like it.

Scott Tracy didn't smile as he looked at himself in the mirror that was positioned in the corner of his bathroom. His reflection showed he was dressed in a charcoal designer suit, and dark blue shirt that he left open, it wasn't his favoured attire. Unlike Alan and Virgil he and his other two brothers tended to dress more casually, he was a jeans and t-shirt kind of guy.

"Does that shirt go with that suit?" Scott noticed Virgil appear in the mirror, he was also dressed in suit trousers and an un-tucked purple shirt.

"I don't care, and this suit isn't going to look any better when I have throttled Alan in it if we find out that he has been up to trouble in this club." Scott turned around to face his brother anger was still on Scott's features.

"You don't mean that." Virgil moved as Scott passed him by to sit on his large bed to put on his shoes.

"Not literally throttling him no, but if he took drugs that night I need to know why?" Scott moved to the next shoe.

"And what if Alan didn't take speed himself?" Virgil knew he would have to be a calming force on Scott no matter what they found tonight. Scott's room was a deep blue but was lighten by three large bay windows, by one stood Virgil who was examining his brother's emotions based on his question.

"Then god the person who did." Scott Tracy had been struggling to come to terms with his brother's situation ever since he heard Alan had had drugs in his body. He couldn't shake the disappointment in Alan that he felt, or the fury of the idea that someone else had hurt his brother.

"I'm ready." Gordon Tracy appeared at the door to Scott room, he had heard the last bits of his brother's conversation and was just as keen to find some answers, but wasn't convinced they would find them at the club.

Scott looked over to Gordon, who was wearing a similar attire to last time he went out. Both elder Tracy's stood as Scott grabbed his wallet which was loaded with high dollar notes and left the room.

John Tracy had just finished his video call to Peter Hemmings as he walked out of the lounge and met his brothers in the hallway as they were coming down the stairs.

"Did you speak with Peter?" Virgil asked John as he approached the last step.

"Yes he is coming here I said he could have a look at the preview copy of my book before it's released." John looked his three brothers up and down he hated getting dressed up the most out of all of them, and so was pleased he could stay here, despite being worried about his brother.

"Just don't let him stay all night John, we may all need to talk later when we get back and it would be easier without company here." Scott smiled at his brother and gathered the keys to the BMW.

"Dad left to see Alan about half an hour ago." John shared his information.

"I know he said goodbye before he left, you two were in the shower." Scott looked at John before shifting his gaze to his other brothers.

"Right, dad has given me some cash but I don't want either of you getting drunk, keep your eyes open and if anything happens find one of us. It's probably best if we split up, but if you see Richard Barton or Ben James don't approach them, just let me know." Scott noticed Virgil had his watch on from their father, as did he. Both of them only usually wore them on special occasions, but tonight Scott knew his father would enjoy seeing them on.

Virgil Tracy studied the club he had just entered he had just got a night pass and the privilege of having it meant handing over a large volume of cash. He moved forward towards a table, the dance floor was to his right and was occupied by a number of beautiful women and a handful of men. Like Gordon had said this was a very upmarket establishment. The room was large and with tables and booths around the perimeter of the first floor. The booths were occupied largely by older wealthy looking men in comparison to the women on the dance floor Virgil noted. Virgil had barely sat down at a table before a scantily clad woman approached him and asked for his order. Virgil watched as she smiled and keyed in his order and number from his card into her hand held machine.

"Gordon." Virgil called over his brother, who had just entered to join him. Virgil had only too look at the girls who were serving and dancing to tell him one thing, a lot more than what meets the eye happens here, and so he wanted his younger brother near him.

"Sit down and order a drink." Virgil smiled at his brother while out of the corner of his eye he saw Scott being escorted upstairs by a young woman who was dressed in a bunny girl style outfit.

Scott Tracy didn't like the idea at all that Alan had been in this place, he had watched his brothers enter on a single night pass, but queried the system as an older wealth men entered with a different coloured card through a separate enterance.

"Can I see you membership card sir? This entrance to the club is for members only." Scott Tracy smirked at the large thirty something year old head doorman, and indicated to the two young looking girls who were leaving their belongings with a young woman in the hallway before him.

"They members?" The manager shook his head.

"Guests for one night only, are members like to see some new young eye candy on the dance floor every now and again. I'm going to have to ask you to leave sir unless you want to join." Scott smirked again; there was no chance he was leaving.

"I want to join, and I'm not talking for the night. I was looking for something a little more private though than a dance floor of women, some quiet time." Scott smirked at the man as he mentioned the last bit.

"Sir that's a gold membership privilege only, you only get that if you're referred by a member, a silver membership for the night means you and drink and watch all you want though." Scott thought on his feet.

"Richard Barton referred me, I'm new in town were doing business together, you don't want me to go back saying you didn't let me in do you?" The head doorman shared a glance with the bouncer, and Scott was indicated to move into a large luxury office by the side of the entrance hall.

"I'm sorry I didn't know Richard had referred anyone lately, I heard he was in here recently but I hadn't been here for a few nights so someone must have forgotten to tell me about you Mr…"

"Tracy." Scott was oozing confidence as he placed himself in the leather chair behind the expensive desk.

"I just need your credit card Mr Tracy and I will get you a gold card, help yourself to the facilities upstairs anything you want you just give them this card, the number on it tracks your orders and takes your payments. Why don't you let me know what you would like and we place that information on the card."

"What I like?" Scott tried not to look naïve.

"Well are private rooms let you have a one to one with some of are employees, if you can afford it. We have a lot of nice girls and guys, personal ideas; if you like blondes or brunettes thing like that go on your card as we aim to please are clientele?"

"I don't really have any preferences, any girl." Scott spoke as he noticed a blonde girl appear by his side and she smiled and indicated for him to follow her.

Scott had no problem taking his eyes off the bunny clad girl and to the environment he was in. He followed her up a glass stair case behind the bar, the girl indicated for him to swipe his card on the side of the door as the security men nodded at him and moved out of the way. As the dark haired pilot continued to follow his escort through the door he entered another set of stairs that were surrounded by a black leather clad walls.

Scott Tracy internally groaned as he entered a room with a large glass wall nearest to him that showed the dance floor and stage below, the music was quieter here and a new selection was playing in this room. His eyes moved to the opposite direction to see another stage and a few lap dancing poles in the centre of the room. Surrounding the stage were ten large booths all facing the stage where a young girl was stripping to the music.

"Thanks I'll have a whiskey." Scott took back the card the girl had taken from him for the drink and quickly noticed a handful of young women notice his arrival, all barely dressed.

"Seen anything that you want? You can just pick one if you want to see more." Scott only then noticed the bunny girl was back with his drink.

"And what if I wanted a private viewing with you?" Scott put on his sultry tone of voice, and eyed with fake pleasure the girl before him. He had no desire or intension of doing what she expected; these girls were not his type.

Scott picked up his drink and followed the girl, she had knee high boots and a low cut black corset on, her make up was thick, and Scott didn't even want to know her age.

As he swiped his card through the slot an automatic black door opened that was hidden from view from his previous seat, he again swallowed his anger as he entered the small room. Scott moved to sit in on the large sofa, the room contained lots of mirrors and low dim lighting, and the walls were covered in expensive red and gold paper. His escort removed his jacket and stood before him before she slowly turned around for his approval.

"What can I get for you then?" Scott wondered how the woman in front of him had come to be in this place. As he thought that she had opened the drawer next to him, Scott soon saw the contents of the drawer and knew he had to stop this experiment here. The pilot eyed the selection of lubricates, restraints, condoms and toys with regret for the girl before him as she began to remove her clothing.

"Stop!" Scott held his hand out in front of him and took the girl by surprise.

"Would you like to do this another way?" She smiled as she got on her knees and moved her hands towards the pilot's belt.

"What I need is you to help me find out about someone who was in this club last night?" The blonde pulled back and looked very worried.

"What do you think this is? I get paid to entertain clients not give information out on them, I don't know anything." She moved away from Scott quickly, he noted how scared she was.

"I'm leaving, and don't think that they wont throw you out for this." She moved toward the door.

"Please I'll pay you anything, I don't want sex with you and I'm not going to tell anyone about this. I just want to know if my brother could have been drugged here or not." Scott remained seated so not to scare her more, as she stopped and turned around.

"This is my brother, have you seen him here before?" Scott showed her a picture of the youngest Tracy and noticed her reaction.

"He's usually here with the boss or Richard Barton, I've seen him downstairs but he never comes into this part with us." Scott felt slightly relieved by that idea.

The young women eyed the man before him and saw worry in his face. Usually she wouldn't dream of giving information like this out, but as she eyed the photo and the idea of him being drugged, her best friend's current situation came to mind.

"Listen this club is strict on clientele and security; if he didn't come upstairs to the private suites then he wouldn't have been able to take drugs in the club at all. Security watches everyone and people are searched before entering, they especially keep an eye on clients like your brother who are linked with the boss." She had sat on the far stool now but still looked anxious by what she was revealing.

"If your brother took drugs that night he either took them after he left the club or I have seen him in the office before, he may have taken them in there, but only management are allowed in." Scott looked concerned.

"Is Richard Barton someone who could get in there?" Scott was terrified by the answer as she nodded.

"Nearly all of the time he spends here is in the office he's usually drinking with Ben James, I saw your brother in there with him about a month ago as I delivered some drinks to them." Her eyes moved to Scott's wallet and he quickly caught on.

"Thanks, here take it all but promise me that you will try and get out of this place, you can do better than this." Scott handed over a large amount of cash and looked at the young girl with regret for her situation. She gave him a sad smile before taking the cash, but she was about to exit the room when she turned back.

"There's something else, but I can't be sure…" She stopped and her hands nervously fiddled with his bow on her corset.

"Please I will take anything that could help me." Scott noted her anxiousness.

"My best friend works here and over the last six months he keeps getting called to the office, I think he's having sex with someone in there, he keeps denying it saying he can't talk about it, so it must be someone important." The young woman moved to pick up the photo she had previously dropped onto the chair, she studied it again before handing back to its owner.

"I'm sorry to hear that your friend is subjecting himself to that but…" Scott looked slightly confused by the turn the conversation was taking but was cut off by the woman again.

"My friend looks like your brother, so if someone did drug him it could have been…to have sex with him." The idea hit Scott like a freight train, and the young man swallowed the disgust and sickness he now felt.

"Are you sure? Barton was at a meeting last night so he wasn't even here and Ben…." Scott felt panicked and was keen to piece together the facts only.

"Oh… but I saw Richard Barton enter the club about midnight, he went straight upstairs to the office, I remember because I asked him if he wanted anything."

The young women looked one last time at the man before her, his head now was in his hands and dread and anger covered his features, she quietly left the room without another word. The large amount of cash she now had could get her and her baby back to a real life and away from this nightmare, and for that she thanked the stranger.

Scott Tracy had never felt so appalled by an idea and as he considered the accusation his mind flashed back to previous memories. Firstly the elder Tracy remember his father saying Barton was obsessed with his mother and now with Alan, then he recalled Barton holding Alan in the hospital, it was all too much for Scott he slammed his hands onto the couch. His blue eyes contained hatred like he had never felt before; he left the room swiftly and quickly scanned the bottom floor for his brothers. Scott's hands gripped the steel bar before him as he noticed a man speaking to Virgil at the bar. The stranger's expensive suit and age compared to Virgil's repulsed him and only served to mix more bitterness into the new information he had learnt.

"Get the hell away from him." Scott held Virgil from behind and spat at the man beside him.

"Were leaving now." Scott addressed this to a confused Virgil as he indicated for Gordon to join him.

"Come on." The two brothers shared a glance before swiftly following their elder brother as they all left the club and approached the car.

"What happened? Did you find what we need?" Gordon shouted to his brother but Scott ignored him and stopped by the car and turned to Virgil.

"Go home and wait there, I'm going to call dad and meet him at his office." Scott ordered him rather than spoke to him and Virgil was concerned by that, as his brother had switched off his emotions now and was in command mode.

"Scott what is going on?" As brown eyes met blue Virgil saw the hatred his brother held.

"Please just do it Virgil, I have to speak to dad. Go home I need to know you are both safe and you will be there, now go." Scott yelled at his brothers as he gave Virgil the key fob and walked away down the street.

John Tracy smiled as he saw Peter through the glass of the front door, he had been emailing and chatting to Peter Hemmings for the past weeks, and was pleased to see his new friend again.

"Hi Peter, come in." John waved his arm wide to suggest that Peter enter, as he then did.

"Hi John, it's so nice to see you." Peter embraced the bright haired blond with a hug, which was unexpected and surprised the older Tracy son.

"Thank you Peter, come through I was just in the reading room." John moved as Peter followed.

"I'm so looking forward to reading your book John, I'm proud of you." John smiled with slight surprise, of which he hid from Peter.

"That's nice of you to say." John sat down in his reading armchair as Peter took the small cosy couch next to John.

"Well I its not surprising really as I feel so close to you and your dad, you're like a brother to me." Peter beamed but John didn't hold his shock at that comment so well, so this time so took a leaf from Gordon's book.

"Well let me think, do I need anymore brothers?" John smiled and chuckled at his comment, but he noticed Peter looked unsettled by the idea and missed the humour.

"I'm joking; you're a good friend Peter. Oh and why I remember dad wanted me to thank you for staying in the apartment, we just needed some time to sort some family issues out." Peter smiled back with understanding to John's words.

"Well I understand completely I have come across kids like Alan before. I have experienced lots of spoilt, attention seeking kids who only want to ruin lives and cause trouble." John saw the jealously in Peter's voice and eyes; he had never seen this side of Peter before.

"Well I'm not sure Alan's that bad; dad tries not to spoil any of us and I don't think Alan wants to ruin are lives." John would defend any of his brothers to anyone, no matter what they had done.

"I'm sorry John I am being rude; it's just maybe an outsiders look is just what you need to really see Alan. Clearly he's out for trouble, he teamed up with your father's enemy for god's sake this new attitude and behaviour clearly shows his true character. Barton's obviously showering Alan with money and gifts, just look at the ridiculously expensive Mercedes he had. Alan even has the audacity to have a licence plate that reads 'speed', he clearly has turned against what it means to be a Tracy."

John's light blue eyes were deep in thought as Peter smiled sweetly and picked up the copy of John's new book from the coffee table.

Peter flicked through the book but kept glancing at his companion who looked troubled by his words.

"I'm sorry John I suppose Alan is still your brother, I just understand how important family is, clearly Alan doesn't. If you need a friend to talk too I'm willing to listen." Peter implored as he placed John's book on his lap.

"Thanks Peter." John still looked unsettled and glanced at the clock before remembering Scott's request for Peter not to be present when his father returned.

"Peter why don't you take this copy and read it at home, we can meet soon and chat about it some more." John stood up, and Peter looked worried.

"Have I done anything to upset you John?" Peter stood but not meeting John's height.

"No of course not I'm just expecting them back soon and we need to talk some more, that's all." John moved towards the hallway as he spoke and turned to smile at Peter as he opened the room door.

"Okay then, how about we meet tomorrow?" Peter looked pleased by the idea, and John nodded having no reason not too.

"Erm, okay I suppose tomorrows fine." John shrugged as Peter walked next to him towards the front door.

"Thank you John I always enjoy talking with you, maybe you me and Jeff could do something soon together?" Peter stepped onto the porch and into the cold dark night air as John again nodded from just next to the door.

"Sure I don't see why not." Peter smiled and John was pleased to see the change Peter had been through, as he now had a career and more social interactions, but something Peter had said was still bugging him.

"Night John." Peter turned to leave as the elder spoke.

"Peter…Alan will always be my brother you know, no matter what he does." John felt some pleasure at reminding Peter of that fact, but again noticed the effect it had on his visitor's eyes, before Peter smiled and moved away down the drive.

"Can I come in?" Jeff spoke again as his son still looked confused in front of him.

"No… Why are you here?" Alan spoke with bitterness and bluntness, his head swam and pain ached in his chest and the blond lent his weight on to the door.

"I wanted to see if you were okay?" Jeff looked troubled by Alan's pale completion and un-focused eyes.

Alan took his eyes of his father and moved them around the hall and driveway but as the security lights caused pain in his eyes and the blond dropped his head and moved off from the door.

"I'm fine, so will you just…" Alan's head swam and he lost the battle to stay upright and focused.

"That's not fine."

Jeff Tracy quickly grabbed Alan as he noticed his son losing consciousness; he placed his son's arm around his shoulder and held his waist with one hand as he moved into the house.

"Alan." Jeff looked down as his son's head as it was leaning against his shoulder, he was now holding most of Alan's weight but Alan didn't respond coherently. Jeff considered moving Alan to his car and taking him away with him, but he knew that would probably only make things worse so he eyed the stairs instead.

"Alan can you hear me?"

Alan opened his eyes to see four copies of his father sitting next to him on his bed, and so quickly shut them again.

"Open your eyes Alan." Alan even in his confusion heard a hint of concern in his father's voice.

By the top of the stairs Alan had been completely unconscious and Jeff had placed him in the room he had seen him in last time he was here. He had been trying to wake Alan up for the past five minutes, and he had only woken just as Jeff had been about to call for an ambulance.

"What are you doing here?" Alan spoke as he gripped his chest.

"Carrying you to bed when you blacked out downstairs, remember?" Alan recalled something about opening a door but his head ached so he stopped thinking.

"Oh, not really no." Jeff looked troubled and noticed the container of pills on the bedside table.

"What have you being taking Alan?" Jeff meant it with concern; but Alan took it with meaning attached.

"Oh, there my next set of drugs I thought I would try cocaine next, you know move onwards and upwards." Alan spoke with hate as he sat up in the bed and again rubbed his head.

Jeff got up of the bed and walked across the room, Alan joking about their situation was the last thing he needed. The elder Tracy examined the room, and focused his attention on a picture of Alan and Barton smiling together. Jeff noted the collection of boxes in the corner which showed evidence that Alan had been packing.

"Going somewhere?" Jeff didn't move his attention from the picture of Alan and Barton; it looked to be very recently taken.

Alan saw his father turn to look at the boxes even though his body was turned away from him.

"I bought a house in California near the Parola Sands race track." Alan left it there.

"Oh, were you ever going to tell me that you are moving to the other side of the country? Or is this just a step up from running away?" Alan didn't reply to that he just watched and wondered about his father's current behaviour, as Jeff looked with detail at his belongings.

"Why doesn't your bedroom at home doesn't look like this?" Jeff rescanned the DVDs, model cars, music, and James Bond memorabilia.

"That's because you have someone else living in it." Jeff turned at that spiteful comment, as he saw Alan taking some more tablets.

Alan shook his head at his father's face.

"There sleeping tablets the doctor gave me that's all, but then I know you and my so called brothers don't believe a word I say anymore, so why should I expect anything else." Jeff turned away from his son again to look out of the window.

"Alan the evidence is stacked against you, and you just can't expect me and your brothers to believe you when you have a history of lying. I know you lied to me about releasing information for that newspaper article." Alan dropped his head and shut his eyes in annoyance.

"Alan we found the person who got you that CCTV disk and they described the person who gave them the cash as you. Oh and now your blood sample has mysteriously disappeared from the lab and so now there is no chance you can be charged with driving under the influence of drugs. Am I supposed to think all this has no explanation that all of this has nothing to do with you Alan?" Jeff looked at his son for his answers.

"No, but clearly the person who did release that article is setting me up. I didn't even know that my blood sample had disappeared until now." Alan was shouting as best he could now as he moved to sit on the edge of his bed.

"Alan I don't care what has happened we can move on from that, but I want to know why you have done these things and why lie about it?" Jeff's voice softened slightly.

"I haven't done anything?" Alan's voice didn't soften as he looked at his father.

"Alan you have cried wolf to many times. You lied to me about being at school when you weren't; you promised to behave but then got expelled from nearly every school you went too. Then you said you wouldn't run away but you have done it again."

"I hated being at those stupid private schools that you sent me too, so how I was suppose to behave well I don't know, I wanted to get out of there." Alan truly hated that part of his life.

"Was it really the school you want to get away from Alan or was it me?" Jeff knew he was right.

"Would you like to explain to me why you ran away over six months ago without so much as a phone call to me to let me know you were okay? Why when Barton offers you a job, a home and a chance to get back at me up you jump at the idea? Oh and the small matter of why the hell are you calling him dad but not me?" Jeff got more annoyed and upset by every question, and Alan seemed taken aback by his directness and couldn't look at him.

"Why are you asking me these questions when you know the answers? I left because I wanted to do something that you didn't want me to do, Richard just wanted to help me." Despite feeling unwell anger was brewing in the blond.

"Why are you acting like I am the only one who has caused this? Before you knew I was spending time with Richard you couldn't careless what I was doing? The only time you ever spent with me was when you were yelling at me!" Alan shot daggers at his father from his baby blues.

"That's not true, of course I cared, but Alan you have done your best to get away from me ever since Rachel died. Alan you chose to live with Rachel's parents and now Barton rather than live with me, and you still didn't answer my last question."

Jeff eyes fell to the floor; he knew he couldn't lose his temper.

"That's because they never treated me like they didn't want me, that's because they can actually look at me and not feel like they resent me being born." Alan looked at his father he knew that would have hurt his father, the truth always does.

"Alan whatever problems we have I promise we can fix them if you come home, Richard has been interested in you Alan since you were little; why do you think he knows so much about you? Now he got you and is using your past to blackmail me into staying away from you."

Jeff moved to sit next to his son, as Alan dropped his eyes to the floor before raising them to speak.

"I don't believe you." Jeff had a look of disbelief on his face and regret shone in his eyes.

"What?" Jeff was sat next to his son but the tension between them was still immense.

"You believe Barton over me, your own father?" Jeff shot Alan a warning glance but the blond met his father face on and showed his faith in his words.

"Well he's on my side and he actually believes me, unlike you." Jeff could sense the hatred in his voice.

"Alan would you like to explain to me how illegal drugs were found in your blood then if you didn't take anything?" Jeff spoke slowly but anger was in his words.

"I don't know." Alan complained.

"I take it you also don't know how the media got the information about us, or how a security person who sold the CCTV disk described you as the person who bought it?" Jeff tried to reason with Alan.

"No, I don't." Jeff lowered his head before again looking up at Alan, he looked exhausted and dazed.

"Alan…I'm not angry at you I just want to make things right. Alan just tell me the truth and we can move forward together." Jeff closed the gap between him and his son and wrapped his arm around Alan's shoulders.

"You just can't believe me. If this was Scott, John, Virgil or Gordon you would have been right behind them wouldn't you. You would have never questioned them or their honesty, but you can't believe me." Alan spoke before getting up and moving away from his father, while Jeff shook his head the entire time.

"That's not true." Jeff replied.

"Yes, it is!" Alan yelled back.

"Alan do you want the reason why I don't believe you? It's because I heard you on the phone to me. You were distressed and disorientated; can you explain your behaviour about that? Or why you crashed your car?" Jeff's controlled behaviour slipped and he raised his voice in return.

"I don't even remember calling you or why I would have done." Alan replied as he stood away from the bed.

"Doesn't that say everything?" Alan knew that would have been Jeff's reply.

"Alan I know you're angry at me and I know Barton is influencing your behaviour, but Alan you crashed your car because you had drugs in your system. Your behaviour and actions are being influenced because of him and look where it's landed you. I want to help you…I want you home with me." Alan seemed to be questioning the memories of the previous night.

"Alan you were in a club you shouldn't have been anywhere near at your age, or ever. You're dealing with Barton and Ben James, both of whom are trouble and are willing to do anything to get what they want. Barton wants revenge on me and is willing to hurt you to do that. If you can't remember anything or explain these events you have to admit that it's at least possible Alan that this is true." Jeff pleaded.

Alan looked around the room and considered the question he had been asked, he knew it was possible, the pain and hurt he felt was difficult to deal with each day. He had found release in many ways, racing, pushing himself to his limits and burying everything, anything to rid himself of his feelings.

Alan looked disturbed and troubled by his lack of memories of the events his father spoke of, and Jeff saw every emotion on his son's face. Jeff noticed Alan rub the pain from his head again and something occurred to him as he watched Alan.

"Have you done this before?" The young blond heard the question his father asked but his head swam and his eyes hurt, and so Alan knew he didn't have the energy or ability to lie about this answer. However what was more the young driver felt the shame and regret for his past actions.

"Alan?" It was whispered with despair.

"Alan look at me!" Jeff yelled loudly from his position on Alan's bed.

"Have you taken drugs before?" He knew the answer by Alan's lack of resistance, but to confirm the answer Alan glanced at him for an instant with regret shading his features.

Jeff Tracy's mind was scattered by learning this information, and he could barely containing his anger, sadness and disappointment.

"I don't believe this!" Jeff spoke and Alan saw the look of disappointment in his eyes, he had seen it before, but despite wanting to ignore it he couldn't.

"When? What did you take? Was it Barton? …What were you thinking?" Jeff's fury was clear as he spoke the questions that haunted his mind. He quickly got up from the bed and walked away towards the window he didn't look at Alan once.

"Sit down." Jeff broke a long silence that settled between them, and Alan did as he was told and sat back down on the bed.

"Start talking Alan." Jeff spoke slowly but with frustration in his tone, but Alan was more hurt by the fact his father wasn't looking at him or was anywhere near his position.

"I…what do you want to know?" Alan spoke with unease and the confidence and anger was gone from his voice.

"Everything, anything, just start talking." Jeff answered the question and Alan considered the problem he was in as he exhaled.

"It was nothing like this. It was one time only; I took ecstasy…that was it. I've never done it again." Alan explained slowly.

"Oh we can come to that in a minute. When?" Jeff asked and Alan paused for a long time before speaking.

"Does it matter?" Jeff heard Alan's resistance to answer.

"Don't start, just answer the question!" Jeff yelled and Alan looked again at his father's back.

"It was a mistake, I just wanted to get away from stuff and so I took it and didn't really think about it." Alan explained and Jeff heard an honest resentment of his own actions in Alan's voice.

"Did Barton give it you?" Alan looked up as he heard the question with confusion.

"No, he couldn't I didn't know him then. I was at school, I was fourteen." Jeff turned instantly to look at Alan when he heard those words, his assumption of Barton's involvement, and anger at Alan vanished.

"What?" Jeff whispered in amazement, and Alan saw the horror on his father's face.

"I thought it was in the past months and that Barton had encouraged you...I thought it was this lifestyle…I thought…What the hell were you doing taking drugs at fourteen?" Jeff's dismay never faltered from his voice and Alan wished he could sleep as the pain hit him again.

"I just… I don't know. It was stupid. I wasn't thinking I just…" Jeff examined his youngest in front of him and truly considered that Alan's state of mind based on his childhood had really damaged him. Jeff had struggled to help his children deal with their mother's death, but had supported them with memories and details of how their actions would have impacted their mother. However Alan had handled Rachel's death so differently to his previous experience. Alan spoke to no one for so long; he refuses to attend her funeral or do anything else but sit alone. Jeff sat and remembered the long days after Rachel's death.

_Flashback…_

"_Scott you have to go back to training it's important, Virgil, John and Gordon are already back at school." Jeff calmly tried to persuade his eldest to return to the Air Force training now his leave for Rachel's funeral was over._

"_I know, but…" Jeff knew what he was referring too or more whom he was referring too._

"_Dad, Gordon's starting at his new school so he won't be here during the week and John and Virgil are both at University as well, so…." Scott explained as he stood in the kitchen of the Tracy home._

"_What are you saying Scott?" Jeff knew as he looked up at his son from his position at the table._

"_Dad you're going to have to look after Alan on your own." Jeff nodded and leaned back in his chair._

"_I realise that Scott, but I have brought you all up for the past eleven years on my own, I have had some practice." Scott nodded he was having to be diplomatic._

"_Dad." Jeff raised his voice and interrupted his son._

"_If you have something to say just say it Scott." Scott lowered his head._

"_You haven't exactly spent a great deal of time with Alan in the past ten year's dad. He probably isn't going to be that easy to look after, especially now." Scott paused; he and his brothers had been worried about this since they found out that Gordon was granted a place at the school for pre-entry WASPS. _

"_Scott, I appreciate your concern but I have no problem looking after Alan." Jeff got up and put his cup on the sideboard. _

"_Now go." Jeff picked up Scott's bag and passed it to him._

"_Make sure you say goodbye to Alan, he's probably in his bedroom in the outhouse. I'm moving him out of there tomorrow anyway; he can stay in Virgil's old music room in the attic." Jeff instructed his son on his plan._

"_Don't you think that it's a bit soon to move him into the house and away from Rachel's room?" Scott asked with apprehension._

"_Scott I can't have him sleeping in another part of the house on his own, anyway he'll be at school when Rachel's things are packed away tomorrow." Scott's frown deepened by his father's words._

"_Dad!" _

"_Scott, he's not staying in there on his own, and he has to go back to school sometime." Jeff answered the questions he knew his son was opposed too. _

"_Dad I have had to forced Alan to sleep in my room ever since Rachel died; I carry him to my bed, then I go to sleep and he doesn't, and in the morning he is back in Rachel's room again. He hasn't slept, eaten or said more than about five words in over a week, this is too soon." Jeff analysed his sons words, both were concerned about Alan but Jeff had the disadvantage of having experienced this before._

"_Scott you were Alan's age when your mom died, I have been through this before, I know things are difficult for him but this is why I want him sleeping in the house with me." Scott paused and memories of him being Alan's age surfaced in his mind._

"_Dad I had my brother's right by me and you to lean on and come too." Jeff looked at his son with offence._

"_What are you saying Scott? That Alan won't want to come to me." Both Tracy's shared a look, Scott didn't want to put his father's past actions on trail here but Alan was never going to respond to Jeff the way he had done._

"_I'll just say goodbye to Alan." Scott left the room, he knew his father wasn't going to budge on this matter. Jeff Tracy exhaled and looked out of the windows as Scott approached the out house. The billionaire knew it wasn't Scott alone that was worried about Alan being left alone in his care, Rachel's parents and his other sons were troubled about the idea too. He had to admit he wasn't worried by the idea but more by the fact that he now had to deal with Alan and the memories that he caused. He had spent time with his youngest along with his other sons, but being alone with Alan was rare, and the boy seemed uncomfortable in his presence. Rachel had been Alan's world, but Jeff had only really noticed that recently, he was unsure to how Alan would react based on the new environment he was now in. _

_The young pilot knocked on the door of Rachel's bedroom before pushing it open. He knew Alan would have been inside or in the adjoining room which was Alan's bedroom. Scott's heart ached for the sight before him. The ten year old was sitting on the floor by Rachel's bed; in his hand was a small toy car. Alan looked up at the intruder but then continued with his actions of moving the car along the floor._

"_I have to go back to the base Alan." Scott explained with sorrow, Alan didn't respond at all._

"_Dad will be here, and Gordon at the weekends, and we'll all visit." Scott tried to ease his guilt at leaving. _

"_Will you be okay here with dad?" Alan gave him a slight glance and a shrug. _

"_Alan please say something, I'm really worried about you." Scott moved to sit by the young boy and wrapped his arm around his small shoulders._

"_I'll be fine." Scott saw the exhaustion in his brother's face and eyes._

"_Coming out to say goodbye to me?" Scott asked but was only rewarded by a shake of Alan's head._

"_Bye." The young voice was neutral and all his attention was focused on the one tiny car toy and nothing else._

_Scott's heart sank again and as he stood to leave he noticed his father in the doorway with a look of sadness on his face. The elder Tracy had experienced his sons crying and grieving for their mother, but this was new to him. Alan was silent, uninterested and wanted nothing to do with him. Only by force or shouting did Alan do things like eat or speak, and Jeff hated the idea that was his only ability to communicate with his youngest son. As he looked from the doorway the billionaire wondered if Alan would ever recover or accept Rachel's death._

_Present time…_

In that instant when he looked at his youngest son Jeff Tracy knew the answer to that question he had asked so long ago. Alan hadn't dealt or accepted Rachel's death, not now not ever, and from that day he was left with a son he barely knew and whom wanted nothing to do with him.

"Drugs at fourteen?" Jeff spoke more to himself than to Alan, and felt extreme guilt for never even knowing he had done so.

"Why have you never told me this?" Anger returned slightly to Jeff's voice.

"I'm not really sure when the right time is to say something like this, but seen as through your taking this so well maybe I should have said something before." The cynicism was clear and it only made Jeff more cross.

"Fantastic Alan, make a joke of it, but I'm sure as hell not laughing." Alan looked at him again with aggravation.

"I made a mistake okay, it's done and I can't take it back." Jeff dismissed this though.

"So, based even more on this new information I take it you still expect me to believe that you didn't take any drugs last night?" Jeff's mind was set and Alan knew it, as Jeff moved away from Alan again.

"Yeah, is that too much to ask from you?" Alan spoke softly and in that minute Jeff saw his late wife again in his son before him, and his silence spoke volumes for Alan.

"Apparently for me it is." Alan tried to hid is disappointment but he failed.

"I think it's time you left." Alan didn't look at his father again.

"I couldn't agree more?" Both Tracy's turned to the door, as Ben James stood in the door way with a grey suit and open shirt on.

"Hey." Ben directed this to the blond as he moved to sit next to him on the edge of the large bed. He smiled at Alan before looking back at Jeff.

"He's just leaving, and I'm definitely going to sleep, isn't that right?" Alan half smiled back at Ben before he looked to his father for confirmation.

"I'm going nowhere without you." Jeff spoke giving Ben a fractious look.

"I don't want anything to do with you. Get out." Alan's hatred was clear.

"I think you heard that clearly Jeff." Ben got up and approached Jeff.

"I'm not leaving my son with you." Jeff moved pass Ben and snatched Alan's arm and pulled him to his feet. Alan's true condition was only then was apparent to Jeff when Alan struggled to find his balance and his muscles lacked the strength to hold his weight. Alan fell forward on to his father and Jeff held him firm with his arms wrapped around his son and his shoulder supporting Alan's head. In that moment Jeff flashed back to one of the final nights he had with Lucy, that night he had held her in a similar way. In that moment Jeff understood what he had lost with Alan, and the true damage he had done to his own son. Jeff stood sit and brushed his hand through Alan's hair before kissing his forehead, Alan only looked at him with such confusion by his actions.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Jeff looked reflectively at Alan again before he let him go and moved to approach the door he turned as he reached it.

"Bye son." Jeff's eyes met a carbon copy of Lucille's.

"You never call me that." Alan cut the link between their eyes; he wanted that to hurt his father but couldn't look to see if it did.

Alan buried his head in the black silk covered pillow; he was losing his fight to stay awake now his pills were kicking in.

"He's gone." The voice came from the window and Alan saw Ben approach the bed and sit next to him before speaking.

"Get some sleep you must be exhausted." Alan nodded and half smiled at Ben for his help; he was unconscious in seconds and into a deep slumber.

Ben smiled down on the sleeping young man as he dragged his fingers over the sleeper's soft hair and down his tanned cheeks.

"Alan." He spoke loudly, and gently shook the blond, he got no response but that pleased the elder man. Ben moved to lie next to Alan but hunched over the youth in a dominant position. Ben had had his own suspicions to Richards's real reasons behind bring Alan into their lives, but once he had seen Alan he felt he knew why Richard wanted him so much. The young blond was beautiful and from his position he could feel Alan's hot breath and smell his scent, and Ben's eyes glazed with a perilous desire. He had been enjoying the perks of his private club business a lot lately, but he had a strong suspicion that Richard had or was planning to enjoy himself in the same manner with the blond that now lay unconscious next too him.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Truths and Traitors

Richard Barton pressed the pause button on the remote in his hand, as he zoomed in on the image and stared at the now stationary shot of Alan Tracy. It had been captured on CCTV from across the street as Alan left the club. The only light cast around the office was from the large TV screen showing Alan's face and a lamp on the far side of the desk also on which Richard was also sitting. The offices at the top of Barton industries were deserted, but it didn't matter anyway. Richard was lost in the confusion of his own mind by the new information he had just learnt, until he was rudely disturbed.

"You sick son of a bitch!" Jeff Tracy stormed into the office as Richard stood and turned towards the source of the commotion.

Jeff Tracy was overwhelmed with anger and hatred after speaking with his eldest son just after he had left Alan and he had instantly gone to find Barton.

"I swear to god there is going to be nothing left for anyone to find once I am finished with you. Alan is eighteen years old, oh I knew dam well your intentions were not honourable but I never thought you were this sick." Jeff spat with hatred as he grabbed Richard's shirt and shoved him forcefully backwards.

"What are you talking about?" Richard still looked surprised by his visitor as Jeff moved closer again.

Jeff Tracy swallowed his anger and tried to focus on his questions.

"If you have laid so much as one finger on my son I'll kill you." Jeff pushed Richard towards the wall further as he spoke slowly but wrathfully.

"Jeff what the hell are you going on about?" Richard tried to push Jeff away but the elders grip was intense. Jeff shook his head with anger as he held firmly the man against the wall.

"The cars, the gifts, the money, was that your perverted plan? You groom my son into trusting you so you could drug him and use him for sex." The anger overwhelmed Jeff as he spat his words and exposed the horrific idea Scott had uncovered.

Richard Barton stopped struggling and looked with shock at the man before him, but Jeff couldn't hold his annoyance anymore as he threw a punch at Richard and he landed on the floor beside him.

"…You think I'm sleeping with Alan?" Richard Barton held his lip as he laid on the floor, the man above him he believed could easily kill him at this moment.

"Jeff are you crazy? I have never, and never would touch Alan. He's just a kid, where the hell did you get that idea from?" Richard angrily hit back at the concept as he got to his feet.

Jeff Tracy took in the words Richard said, the younger man appeared to look truly disturbed by the accusation but Jeff wasn't convinced, he knew this man well.

"At Ben's club one of the girls told Scott that the management has been selecting young men to entertain them upstairs, and they seem to have a strong resemblance to Alan. This happens to be the same club in which Alan had taken or was given drugs and that you introduced him too. Oh and where you happened to be last night but forgot to mention anything about being there." Jeff spat again, as Richard turned to face his fellow businessmen with a look of disgust.

"I called in at the end of the night after my meeting, Ben said Alan had just left the club so I went straight home that's was when I found Alan. I can't believe you are stooping this low Jeff to get me away from Alan." Richard yelled back as the billionaires stood nearer to each other before Richard indicted to the television screen near him.

Jeff Tracy had a pulsing of anger through his veins he desperately wanted to beat the life out of the man before him, but he turned to look where Richard indicted to see on the screen a paused image of Alan.

"Alan wasn't drugged at the club, he couldn't have been I have seen all the CCTV footage I could get of Alan driving back through the city and on none of them is he driving erratically or showing any sign of being out of control." Richard moved past Jeff and closer to the TV.

"Alan couldn't have driven home normally if he had been given or taken drugs at the club as they would have been influencing his behaviour and his senses before he got home." Jeff took in this information as Barton continued.

"I had Alan's blood sample examined by experts, the hospital found traces of speed but then stopped looking, but when you look deeper there was also traces of a sedative." Richard spoke with passion at the new information he was exposing, but Jeff Tracy only seemed more perplexed.

"What are you suggesting?" Jeff moved his eyes from the screen back to Barton repeatedly.

"The sedative in his blood stream would have made him unconscious almost instantly, he must have been given it just before, or just after he crashed, which means someone else was near Alan at the accident site."

"This again only incriminates you more as you found Alan." Jeff spoke with fury as he moved closer to the screen to examine the recording for himself. Richard Barton exhaled deeply and softened his voice.

"Jeff you may hate me, but god you must at least know I would never hurt Alan." Jeff looked at Richard unconvinced by his words.

"I know that you would do anything to get back at me for Lucy choosing me over you." Jeff's eyes glazed with anger and bitterness for having this man back in his life again.

"Fine, the evidence will have to do then." Richard threw a file in Jeff's direction, and a firm strong tone returned to his words.

"I received this from the private investigators I've got on the case an hour ago. The GPS recorded Alan's car stopped at the accident site for nearly twenty minutes before the signal was lost. At the same time it showed Alan car was stopped I was driving back from the city to the house, I was exactly about five minutes from Alan' s location when Alan's GPS stopped recording." Richard moved towards the DVD player and fast forwarded the disk before pausing it to show Jeff and image of his car stopped at a red light.

"Look at the time Jeff. If you really want to find out what happened to Alan then you are going to have to look past me and use the evidence." Richard spoke angrily and his eyes met Jeff's and the elder billionaire backed down before he continued to examine the documents before him.

"What are you trying to say?" Jeff couldn't hold his impatience any longer, as he shifted his steel gaze back to Barton.

"The disk I got sent is the recording of Alan arriving and then leaving the house again in the early hours after he visited the club." Richard moved and picked up the disk from the table and held it out to Jeff.

Jeff Tracy took hold of the DVD before him and looked again at a man he didn't trust for an instant, but for the moment he was willing to tolerate this idea. The elder moved towards the player as Richard picked up the remote again.

The clock in the corner indicted the time and date of what was being viewed, as both billionaires watched intently.

"That's Alan leaving for the club." Richard spoke to confirm the evidence as Jeff recalled Gordon left his home around a similar time.

"Fast forward some hours." Jeff spoke sternly but his eyes never left the screen.

"Stop, rewind a bit." Richard did as Jeff asked as both saw a normal calm Alan pull up on the drive and approach the camera to enter the house, however not before the blond paused to pick something up.

"His watch I had it delivered to him that night, that's what he his picking up." Realisation dawned on Jeff's face, but Barton only looked at him with curiosity.

"What watch?" Richard observed with interest as a glimpse of relief appeared for a minute or two on the ex-pilots face.

"Never mind, look at the clock Alan must have only been in the house a few minutes as when he called me he was definitely driving." Jeff took the controller and fast forwarded the disk until Alan re-appeared only minutes later but looking more troubled and hurried. The young man's jacket was in his hand, as Alan approached the Mercedes Jeff paused the image and approached the screen.

"He's wearing his watch." Jeff zoomed in on the image of his son's left wrist, and on it clearly was a large watch.

"So what? He put a watch on in the house, what's more important is the fact he couldn't have had the drugs concoction yet as he his still behaving normally." Richard Barton looked troubled both by the new evidence and by a piece of information he knew nothing about which seemed to easy the troubles of the billionaire he disliked so much.

"No it's important. The hospital told me the only thing Alan had on that they had removed was a ring; he left wearing a watch now but got to hospital with no watch on." Jeff's eyes seemed menacing again as he looked at his companion again.

"Did you take his watch off him before I got there?" Richard looked disgusted by the suggestion and raised his voice also.

"Jeff I was a little busy pulling Alan from a burning car, and making sure he was alive to notice or even bother taking a watch off him. I didn't even know it was from you until now. I would never hurt Alan he is the best thing in my life." Richard moved away from the billionaire and shook his head at the idea and the unpleasant memory of seeing Alan like that.

"All I know is what I have just shared, but the last piece of evidence to help us may come from Alan's car. I have a team working on the car now to see what caused the crash. When I found Alan I was terrified that he was dead. When I held him and dragged him from the car he was so lifeless I was scared to even touch him in case he wasn't breathing. I care about Alan more that you can ever know Jeff, and the allegation that I drugged Alan for sex, is not alone disgusting but also now clearly false. I didn't give Alan speed or anything else. Whatever Scott found in the club has nothing to do with me, it's Ben's club anyway…. Ben."

Richard spoke but the emotions from his early words were drained to dread and disgust by his realisation. Jeff Tracy looked troubled by Richard's change in expression and by his words.

"What? Did you just mean Ben James is the one who is entertaining these young men?" Jeff moved his head slightly and he took in Barton's fury as the younger man snatched his keys from his desk and moved past Jeff, but Jeff held him back.

"Are you telling me you have let Ben James be around Alan when you knew he had been showing an interest in Alan?" Jeff's ferocity returned as did the sickening feeling about what he had just learnt.

"I didn't know anything about his relationships with them; I've been trying to find out what happened to Alan." Richard yelled.

"Trust me he is never going to see Alan again." Richard spoke as he pulled himself away from the elder man, before he stopped due to noticing Jeff's expression turned to horror.

"…I just left Ben James with Alan. I just came from you house Alan was unconscious…" Richard looked with disbelief and disgust before both headed for the elevator.

"He won't hurt Alan." Richard spoke as both stepped in the lift and waited to arrive at their destination.

"How do you know that?" Jeff looked over to Barton as he ran his hands through his hair, wishing he hadn't left Alan.

"He knows I would kill anyone who hurt Alan."

Jeff Tracy drove back the route he had just come from, again with a troubled panic in his mind over Alan's safety.

"Alan!" Jeff Tracy spoke breathlessly as he opened the door to see his youngest son alone in the bedroom.

"Alan" He repeated again just as worriedly as he moved on to the edge of the bed and brushed back his son's flaxen locks. Alan responded by breathing deeply and adjusting his body position.

"Jeff he's just asleep, he's fine." Richard whispered from next to him, relieved himself by the idea.

"I don't want him here, being with you has caused nothing but trouble for us." Jeff quarrelled as he looked at the billionaire, Alan had settled again and fell back into an undisturbed sleep

"Come on Jeff, the kid's asleep at least leave it until he's awake." Jeff examined his son again and moved closer to him.

"Fine, but I'm not leaving." Jeff removed his jacket and pulled out his cell phone as Richard turned to leave the room, but glancing at Alan again before leaving.

"Where are you going?" Jeff quizzed.

"To deal with a problem." Richard didn't turn around and left quickly.

"Scott it's me." Jeff Tracy moved across the room to speak to his eldest son as he watched Barton leave. The billionaire was still not certain what was fact or fiction and how much Barton was influencing events. The evidence he had seen tonight seemed to answer some questions but also create more unanswered ones.

Ben James walked around his boss's office in Barton industries headquarters impatiently, as he waited for his call to go to voicemail before he spoke.

"Rick it's Ben, you said to meet you at seven this morning but your not here, you do know it's a Saturday right?"

"Oh I am well aware of that fact." Ben shut his phone and turned around as he heard his boss entering the room.

"Hey, what's going on?" Ben lent back on to the desk as he noticed the anger and annoyance in Richard's face.

"Oh I think the question is what sick idea have you been imaging would happen with Alan." Richard was used to being inches away from his lover's face but this time Richard's face was burning with rage.

"What?" Ben's exterior remained unfazed but his eyes shifted slightly and his boss saw it.

"If you have touched him Ben I swear they will be finding your body parts all over New York for the next thirty years." Richard held the younger man's shoulders with force.

"Alright just calm down Rick, I haven't touched Alan okay…" Ben's face glazed with a smirk and a malicious gleam.

"…But come on, it's not like we both haven't enjoyed the idea of having some fun with that pretty young blond." Richard exploded with anger as he punched Ben hard in the face so that he fell backwards on to the desk.

"He's a kid, and despite what you and Jeff may think, I love Alan like my son and nothing more. I can't believe I was so stupid to think that Alan being barely legal was enough to stop you going after him." Richard spat as he watched Ben move blood from his cheek.

"If I had had any idea of what you have been up too at your clubs do you really think I would let you within a thousand miles of Alan." Ben looked over to were his boss was pacing with annoyance.

"I think your overreacting, so I thought Alan was a really nice piece of eye candy but that's all, nothing has ever happened. At least I'm not the one fooling myself; I'm at least being honest about my intentions with Alan unlike you. I know you have other reasons behind wanting Alan in your life; I wonder what Jeff would think of that." Ben spoke with confidence as he moved to walk around the desk and stood behind his boss's chair.

"Trust me it is very fortunate for you that you have never tried to lay a finger on Alan, because if I find out that you have, I think you are well aware of what I am capable of Ben." Richards gaze penetrated Ben James attitude slightly, and Richard's darker side shone through.

"But you're right I do have other reasons for wanting Alan in my life and treating him as I do, but those reasons are none of your concern so stay out of it, and stay the hell away from Alan." Richards's voice was raised and emendating a dangerous threat.

"Oh I get it; it's none of my concern then." Ben James moved his head slightly as he commented on his partner's words.

"Rick before Alan was in your life, we were a team. I helped you build Barton Industries; we have worked together for over fourteen years. We are partners, but now you're risking everything because you want to play daddy. I know Alan is a great guy, but you're being ridiculous and your risking everything we had planed ,for Alan. Don't you want more money and power than you ever dreamed possible? You're my business partner and I have a plan that is going to make that all happen."

Richard Barton noted the darkness in his partner's eyes and something about them made him uneasy. Ben James had an unpleasant desire for total power and control, which would make him a dangerous enemy to anyone.

"Ben you have been well rewarded for any business you have helped me with, but your deals are with the wrong people and are nothing that I'm interested in. Illegal arms dealing, drug smuggling, and having terrorists steal and destroy all to line your pockets with dollars is nothing I want. I have no business having that in my life Ben." Ben James eyed his partner with surprise, as Richard returned to move behind his desk as he noted the look of realisation on Ben's face.

"What, you don't think that I have been keeping my eye on you? You may have armies of men to do your dirty work and hide behind a code name but that does stop you showing the darkness you have inside of you Ben.

What is it they say, 'Keep your friends close but your enemies' closer'; I have been tracking your deals for over a year. Having you right by my side meant I could follow the paths of your dealings, and find out about your terrorist employees. Did you really think I had no idea who you really were Ben? You got way out of control and someday you are going to come across people who are going to stand up against your threats and demolish your plans." Richard Barton noticed a smirk appear on Ben's face, but his eyes still echoed terror.

"Well done I underestimated you Rick, but knowing all this puts you in an uncomfortable position doesn't it?" Ben moved to approach Richard.

"It's over Ben. I was waiting to find out what the big plan you had was and why you have been searching for some of the most wanted men on the planet, but I think I have enough evidence against you now to have the FBI more than interested." Alan's influence over Richard had affected him greatly, this was no business he wanted any involvement in and Ben was a danger he was going to erase.

"I doubt it Rick, I could have you killed with in the hour, well maybe two, and what about Alan. Do you really think I wouldn't go after him if you come good on that threat?" Ben circled the billionaire; his voice was quiet but menacing.

"Hand over any evidence you have on me, and we can go are separate ways. I'll leave you and Alan alone, and you keep your mouth shut, win win I make it." As the sun rose through the grey skies of New York and lit the room, Richard turned to face is companion and smiled.

"I'm handing everything over to the FBI, I will never let you threaten either of us, get out Ben before you have the world's police force hunting you down. No matter who you pay, or who you buy there will always be people willing to stand up for the right things, and against men like you and the fear you cause." Richard knew what he had set in motion here and that this would now forever scar his life, but also without his knowledge determine Alan's future.

Ben James looked into the eyes of Richard Barton and knew they were now on opposite sides, the smirk reappeared and a glint of revenge glimmered in Ben's eyes as he lent towards Richard to speak.

"Watch your back Richard because you were right to keep me as a friend before. If anyone thinks they can stand in my way I will destroy them." Ben raised his head and smirked before heading for the door to the office, Richard Barton waited until he had left to pull out his cell phone and make an urgent call.

"I think to quote Lady Penelope accurately it goes 'Penny for your thoughts?'" Virgil Tracy moved into the room at the very top of the Tracy residence and placed himself on the end of the bed in it.

"Can you see through me that easily these days? I think we need to spend some time apart little brother." Scott Tracy gave a sad smile from his position in the small window seat across the room from the door. The pilot's choice of view however was not of the beautiful Tracy gardens below but of the room he was in.

"I don't think that's going to happen so much when dad's plan comes into force, and don't dodge the question Scott. I feel our littlest brother is much of the focus of your thoughts." Scott gazed Virgil's way and met his eyes.

"Wow Virg, and here I was thinking you were doing training in medicine not psychology." The sarcasm was evident; Scott sometimes hated how well Virgil could understand him.

"Well it isn't exactly complicated Scott, this was Alan's bedroom." Virgil moved his gaze around the room but nearly every trace of Alan's presence was gone.

"It still is Alan's room. Not that I really think he was that comfortable in it, he hated having to move from the outhouse to here after Rachel died. Anyway a couple of posters, model cars and motoring magazines don't really allow me to reminisce much.

Virgil moved off the bed and sat on the desk chair as he moved through he noticed something in the corner of his eye.

"Virgil I don't know what were going to do." Scott Tracy sighed and rubbed his head. His father had called last night to say he was staying with Alan at Barton's home and that Alan was asleep but fine.

"Dad actually seemed pretty convinced that Barton wasn't the one interest in Alan like that…" Both brother's shared a worried glace at even the idea.

"That doesn't stop me wanting to know who is destroying this family through, some how between leaving Barton's house and dad finding Alan, Alan had a sedative and speed in his body." Scott Tracy slammed his hands down on to the wooden seat and lowered his head. Virgil Tracy emphasized with his brother and walked over to him after picking up a small object.

"What if Alan was upset by something dad wrote in his card that was with Alan's watch? What if he took drugs himself and then crashed because of it? That's not even the worse thing; Virgil I don't know what is going to be able to heal this rift between dad and Alan." Virgil moved to sit on the closest side of the bed nearer to his brother.

"Scott, dad and Alan have got big problems but I know no matter what Alan has done dad will always love him, he's just scared to show it. And as far as are baby brother is concerned I wouldn't give up on him yet, Alan's running from being a Tracy but that doesn't mean that he won't ever come back to us." Virgil smiled at his brother before opening his brother's hand and placing in it a small red toy car.

"He didn't forget this Scott, he left it here, he wants to be part of this family Scott I just don't think he knows his place here." Virgil left the room leaving his brother staring at the model car knowing that would help his brother his memories.

"I miss you Alan." Scott examined the tiny car; he was surprised the cheap little toy's wheels could still turn the amount his baby brother had played with it. It was a little present Rachel had gotten Alan when he was five and she was looking after a sick Gordon while Jeff was on business. The idea was to keep the child amused for ten minutes, over twelve years later Alan still loved this little car. Scott smiled as he remembering Alan used to carry this toy everywhere, even drawing out a track to practise driving around it using the car. After Rachel died Alan playing with the toy in the middle of the night for months according to his father. Alan just couldn't cope with the reality of Rachel's death and so just played with a tiny silver and red car wanted to escape reality and the pain he felt.

Alan Tracy stood above his red and silver Mercedes McLaren car; he loved this sport and the thrill of the speed and the danger of the race, but he knew he was missing something he just didn't want to admit it. The thought broke the young man from his dreams and he opened his cerulean eyes but was surprised by what he saw.

"Alan are you okay?" Jeff moved back on to the bed as he heard his son stir from his slumber.

"What?..What are you doing here?" Alan confirmed he was at his room at Richards's home as he spoke by scanning the room.

"I was worried about you." Jeff looked calm and attempted to reach out to hold Alan's face but the boy moved predicting the attempt.

Jeff sighed and moved back his hand from his son, before taking a deep breath.

"I have to ask you something, Alan this is important promise me you will tell me the truth no matter what it is?" Jeff considered how to ask his questions as he noted the confusion and annoyance on his son's face.

"I don't know why you came back but just leave before Rick comes in." Alan cast aside his fathers request and attempted to get out of bed.

"Alan, he knows I'm here." Jeff held his son's arm to stop him from moving.

"After I left last night did anything happen?" Jeff ignored the disgust he was feeling and looked closely at his son's expressions.

"Yeah, I when to sleep." Alan tried to move again.

"Alan this is serious, Ben James…did he do anything to you?" Jeff stuttered a bit and looked straight at his awfully confused son.

"Do anything to me? Dad he left and I fell asleep, what are you talking about?" Alan got more agitated as spoke, and Jeff once again held him in his position.

"Alan has either Richard Barton or Ben James ever touched you? Have they ever tried to get you to have sex with them?" Alan could never have expected his father say those words, and checked the sincerity of them before speaking.

"What?" Alan stared blankly at his father.

"Alan just tell me?" Jeff moved to hold Alan's arms with both his hands.

"Are you out of your mind? I know you hate him, but I never thought you would stoop this low." Alan threw off his father's grip and moved off the bed angrily.

"Alan."

"No, neither of them have ever tried anything on with me, and I can't believe you think they would." Alan yelled from across the room back at his father.

"Alan Ben James's personal entertainment at his clubs are specially selected young blond kids, I wanted to know you were okay and to get you away from here." Jeff noted Alan slight surprise but he was still very annoyed.

"Whatever you think Ben's up to it has nothing to do with me, and I really don't think you should be throwing allegations like that around." Jeff lowered his head; relief that Alan hadn't been involved filled his veins.

"I want you to leave." Alan pulled on a clean t-shirt and turned around to show his dominance of the suggestion.

"I want you to come with me." Jeff moved over to Alan and his voice pleaded with the young man.

"You really think I'm going to leave with you?" Alan raised his head with disbelief but both Tracy's turned to look at the door, before Jeff could reply.

"I think you should go with him Alan." Richard Barton couldn't really decide who looked more shocked by his suggestion, Alan or Jeff.

"What?" It voice came from Jeff.

"Alan he's right, you need to go with him." Richard approached the blond and continued to explain as the amazed look on Alan's face hadn't ceased.

"I just heard from my people who are examining your car, Alan you may have crashed but the car was torched with petrol and set alight independent from the accident. Alan you must have been given a sedative and the drugs by someone to stop you leaving the car before it was set alight. Alan there someone else involved." The idea send anger down the two elder men's spines and both shared a glance.

"Someone tried to kill you and make it look like an accident." Alan shook his head slightly and sat back down on the edge of the bed. The idea of relief at finding out what happened two nights ago was gone, replaced by feeling truly disturbed by the idea.

Alan glanced up at his boss before shifting his eyes on to his father.

"But who?" Alan asked.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

Reasons, Resentment and Revenge

The three men stood in the bedroom for minutes in silence, both the elder men examined the young blond on many occasions, but all three were just digesting the information.

"I don't know." Barton replied to the young blond.

"Alan you're not safe here, someone must know where you are staying to plan something like this." Jeff stated and Alan looked to Richard for confirmation of the idea.

"He's right Alan, you can't stay here." Alan knew he was outnumbered and was troubled by the idea of what may have happened in those missing hours.

"Come home, I'm not going to let anyone hurt you at home you will be safe there, and I'm going to update the police so we can catch this guy." Jeff stated.

"No." Jeff shot Richard an angry glare at his remark.

"If he isn't here, at your home is the next place someone will look, and do you want to endanger all of your sons? We need somewhere neutral." Barton suggested.

"We can stay at the apartments for Tracy Corp."

Richard agreed with the reasoning and nodded in confirmation, both looked at Alan who knew he was outnumbered so just shrugged.

Alan Tracy was completely fed up by the time they had reached the apartment. He threw himself on to the large leather couch that faced the windows allowing a beautiful view of the Central park next to them. The building itself was a low rise office building with four lavish apartments above it owned by the Tracy corporation, Alan hadn't been here before and was hoping he wasn't staying too long.

Alan was knocked from his troubling thoughts by a hand on his shoulder from behind.

"You okay kiddo?" Alan turned his head and looked up at Richard, his eyes shone with anger.

"Yep…honestly I'm okay." Alan gave him a half smile, but noticed his father looking at him from across the room. Jeff looked away but Alan had seen his expression and was amazed by it, his father almost looked jealous by seeing this interaction.

Jeff Tracy ended the call he had just made to the police. Alan hadn't said a word to him since finding out someone was had tried to kill him, and with Barton here with them he knew he wouldn't.

"The police need the evidence from the CCTV that's in your office." Jeff looked at his fellow billionaire, who still Jeff noted still had his hand on Alan's shoulder.

"I'll get if for them when I know Alan's safe." Richard shot back and Jeff looked furious as he moved towards him.

"Alan's with me, you know his father he's always safe with me!" Jeff's voice got louder as he got closer to the younger man.

"Yes your right Jeff, you're such a safe and loving father your son was so desperate to get away from you." Sarcasm dripped off every word and Jeff Tracy looked furious.

The blond in question held his head in his hands, he knew this was dangerous territory for the two men; both were angry and upset and were blaming each other.

"What did you just say?" Jeff was about to move closer but Alan interrupted his actions.

"Will you both stop it?" Alan moved from the couch and encouraged Richard away from his father by his arm.

"Rick why don't you go get the disks, I'll be fine I promise. It's not like I'm going anywhere is it?" Both men were surprised by the young man's words, and Alan gave his boss a look like he knew what he was doing.

"Alright I won't be long, and I'm going to get you some personal security as I don't you idea of security downstairs is going to be enough." Richard shot the comment at Jeff Tracy as he picked up his jacket. He gave Alan another concerned look before walking through the open plan apartment towards the door.

Alan heard the door close as he walked towards the window; he stared down at the people walking the streets of New York on the grey Saturday afternoon, he knew what was coming. Jeff Tracy moved to sit at the dining room chair before staring at his son in front of him who had now turned his back to the window and was facing him.

"I'm sorry." Jeff Tracy rarely said that in a truly meaningful way. Alan gazed at his father, deep down he knew this was true but the hurt he felt overrode his senses.

"Oh it's alright it's all forgiven. It's not like you accused me of being a drug addict, a liar by accusing me of telling the whole world how chaotic this family is." Alan's mockery was a clear testament to how he was feeling.

"Alan how could I have known that someone had gone to these extremes to hurt you; giving you drugs and torching your car, we had no evidence to support that until now." Jeff moved towards his youngest, while Alan just looked at him with disbelief.

"You had me saying that I hadn't taken drugs, and that wasn't enough for you." Alan cut his emotions off he was used to these matches with his father, but his father not believing him had hurt and he wanted to get even.

"Alan." Jeff spoke with remorse and regret, and reached out as he approached his son but Alan avoided his grasp and moved towards the sofas to take is early position.

Jeff lowered his head and his hands fell to the rail across the window, he wasn't getting though and he felt terribly guilty as he knew Alan's accusation was true.

"You won't even let me touch you, but you let Barton play 'daddy' whenever he wants." Jeff knew he shouldn't have said it but his envious feelings took over.

"Richard believed me when I told him what happened, you just can't stand the idea he was right and you weren't. You didn't believe me when I promised you I wasn't lying." Alan met his father's eyes and Jeff threw his head back in annoyance.

"Alan I didn't believe you and I'm sorry, Are you going to blame me for this every time we speak?" Alan smirked at the irony.

"Well now you know how I feel, I've had the last eighteen years of you blaming me every time we speak." Jeff looked with slight disagreement and astonishment at Alan's words.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jeff stared at Alan, who didn't bother replying.

"Alan listen, I'm sorry that I haven't been the father I should have been for you, but that doesn't mean I don't care. I have tried, but you haven't exactly made it easy for me. Did you really think I wasn't worried sick when you ran away all those times? Or think how guilty I felt when I left you alone after Rachel died and you fell and nearly drowned in the pool. Alan, I let you go live with Rachel's parents because I knew you were happier there than with me, do you know how much it hurt to except that?" Alan didn't meet his father's gaze they had never spoken about these things before, and Alan was struggling to hear his father's feelings.

"Even now you have run away from me. Alan I hate Richard Barton for a lot of things he has done, but the idea that you turned to him instead of me kills me. You're perfectly fine to except his money and gifts and have him give you so much attention, but you won't even call me to tell me where you are." Jeff sat down on the black leather armchair which was inches from Alan's position, his voice softened and the business attitude was gone.

"Alan I am desperately trying to bridge this gap between us, but the longer you stay with Barton the harder it's getting." Alan looked across to his father; years ago he would have killed for his father's attention like this.

"There you go again, I'm not some prize that you can win in whatever rivalry the two of you have going. You hate the idea that Richard wasn't behind this don't you, because if he was you would have been right. The only reason you let me leave home is because you had already blacklisted me with every F1 company, if Richard hadn't taken me you knew I would be forced to except the future you wanted for me." Jeff shook his head.

"Alan that's not true." The blond scoffed in disbelief, and continued in a raised voice.

"You can blame Richard all you like but we both know this started long before I met him, and as far as the problems between you and me don't bother trying to get me back. You pushed me away for years, and then you yell at me for getting expelled from your rubbish private schools and for running away. You can't expect me to play happy families after everything that has happened between us, why can't you just accept that?" Alan's anger rose and as he yelled at his father and moved away again to stand behind the sofa.

"So what, I'm just supposed to just let you go when someone tried to kill you. Alan I am worried about your safety and even if I wasn't, do you really think I would let that man take one of my sons." Jeff's voice was filled with annoyance. Both were equally matched in ability when it came to shouting in arguments; however no other Tracy son dared too yell back at their father.

Alan's angry blue eyes met the determined brown eyes of Jeff Tracy; both had lost any inhibitions about what to say or not to say to each other. Alan's façade was good, but Jeff saw Alan really had been hurt by the past weeks events.

"You have resented me for being your son my whole life, Richard didn't steal me I wanted to get away from you." Jeff raised his head and looked over to Alan.

"Thanks Alan that's always what a father wants to hear from his son." Jeff was struggling to control his fury, especially as he kept thinking about Barton's questions about when Alan last called his 'dad'.

"Speaking of things I want to hear from you, you never answered the question of why you are calling that man 'dad' and not me." Jeff Tracy's voice was laden with bitterness, jealously, but more importantly hurt.

"That's because he has been more of a father to me than you ever have or could ever be." Alan knew he shouldn't have said it, and his father's expression showed him his words had really cut deep.

Jeff Tracy was stunned but slowly turned and walked away from his son to approach the kitchen. After a few moments of silence between them the billionaire rested his hands on the marble surface, as his head fell forward he focused on the gold band on his third finger. He had lost Lucy the day Alan was born, and he considered for a moment that that day he also lost Alan.

Alan stood still in his position near the large wooden table; he turned his head and glanced at his father on occasion as the silence between them continued. He had never seen Jeff walk away from one of their arguments before, and his silence and sober manner amplified the distress Alan's words had caused.

After an unknown number of minutes Jeff snapped out of his deep thoughts, but continued to look down as he spoke. "I'm going to make sure security doesn't let anyone in to the apartments without my consent, why don't you call your brothers, they're worried about you." Alan noticed the uneasiness in his father's voice, and how he didn't look back at him as he moved towards the door and left the apartment.

Alan Tracy dropped himself on to the chair and lent his elbows onto the dark oak office desk. Outside the light was fading and the window behind the blond did nothing to stop the office room from feeling gloomy. Alan sat contemplating whether he truly had meant the words he had just said, but when he couldn't find an answer he felt comfortable with he dialled the Tracy residence number instead.

John Tracy had just signed off from his video-call to Peter Hemmings, he had planned to meet up with Peter today however the situation with Alan meant he had to cancel the meeting.

"Was he okay that you cancelled?" Gordon Tracy appeared at the doorway behind the blond.

"Yep, he was okay?" John swung around in the chair to face his brother and Scott, who was hovering in the hallway.

"You didn't tell him everything did you? Dad instructed that we tell no-one anything and we stay here together." Scott's voice was raised but both his brothers knew the anger was rebounding on to them and actually was directed at the person hurting Alan.

"I said Alan was having some problems and dad was with him, nothing else." John emphasised the last few words and Scott backed down.

"I'm sorry John; I just can't believe this is happening." Scott moved to sit on the hallway stairs while John joined Gordon near the door.

All three young men contemplated what their father had told them while driving Alan to the Tracy apartments, they were still in disbelief.

"Who would do something like that to Alan, giving him drugs, spreading lies, and try and kill him?" Gordon spoke quietly with amazement clearly dominant in his mind.

Scott Tracy rose to his feet, his brother just speaking of what someone had done to his kid brother made him furious.

"Someone with a death wish, and for hurting Alan I am more than willing to carry that out." Scott leaned his hands against the walls and heard Virgil approaching down the stairs.

"Scott you're not to blame for this and neither are we." Virgil needed to say no more, John and Gordon shared a glance and Scott turned around and eyed angrily his brother.

"Virgil someone made Alan look like he hated us and that he was self destructing, but the fact is they couldn't make us not believe or trust Alan, we made that decision on our own. He told me the truth and I called him a liar. We didn't believe him, I didn't believe him!" Scott was yelling by the end and his emotions of guilt and shame were clear.

The three Tracy's looked at their older brother. His eyes showed such regret and all knew and felt that they had broken the most sacred promise they had, to stick together as brothers no matter what.

"Scott stop blaming yourself, it isn't going to help." Gordon tried to reassure his brother, while John rapped his arm around his shoulders to try and ease the regret Gordon was feeling.

"That guy told you it was Alan that brought that disk, how…" John Tracy tried to logic through the events of the past weeks.

"Isn't it obvious, someone paid the guy more to say it was Alan, someone was clearly expecting us to check their tracks" Scott examined his brother's expressions as he spoke; he knew all were worried about Alan, as well as feeling guilty for their negative judgements.

"If they were following Alan the night you saw him then they must have been following Alan for a while." John looked at his second youngest brother.

"Did Alan say anything about anyone being around him a lot, or was anyone watching you at the club?" Gordon moved to sit on the stairs, taking Scott's previous position.

"I don't know, I wasn't looking at anyone else, and Alan didn't really talk about anything but racing really." Gordon's usual good natured spirit was absent from his voice.

"Is dad sure Barton isn't behind this? He is so close with Alan he would have the best opportunity." Virgil Tracy asked his elder brother.

"Barton's alibi is accurate, there is no way he could have altered all the CCTV, and he was the one who told us Alan's blood had traces of a sedative in it if he was guilty he wouldn't have done that." John Tracy spoke first.

"He could have gotten someone else to do both of those things, he isn't trustworthy." Scott Tracy wasn't willing to rule out a man he knew had caused such problems between his parents.

"Scott I know you and dad don't like him, but what reason would Barton have to hurt Alan?" Gordon looked towards his brother to try and get the idea through but was greeted by an annoyed expression for his support of Barton.

"He could be using Alan to get back at dad; to me that's motive enough." Scott Tracy paced again, while all brothers shared a glance.

"I can't just stand here doing nothing; I'm going to see dad and Alan." Scott Tracy headed for the door.

"Scott dad said stay here." Virgil held him back.

"Yeah what if they come here to find Alan? We need to stick together Scott." John Tracy sounded resolute.

Scott Tracy was ready to argue back when the video caller sounded. All the boys followed the eldest as he approached his father's office and opened the line.

"Alan." Scott Tracy was surprised to see his little brother.

"You okay?" Virgil chirped in.

"Yep, fine really." Gordon half smirked at Alan's clear optimism.

"Alan someone tried to kill you, you can't be fine?" Gordon quizzed.

"What do you want me to say Gordon?" Scott noticed something was wrong.

"You and dad getting on alright?" Alan Tracy's blue eyes met his elder brother's eyes; he knew they had been fighting.

"Well seen as though he called me a liar and a traitor, I would say we are getting on as well as possible, but then so did you and I seem to be speaking to you." Alan leaned back into the chair, and saw his eldest brother's head shake slightly.

"Alan dad's trying to help you, and we are all really sorry that we didn't believe you." Virgil added gently.

"Alan." Alan glanced at Gordon; regret was etched on his features.

"We didn't mean to hurt you; I was just worried about you."

"All of us were." Virgil added as he held Gordon's shoulder, Alan hated that they felt so bad.

"Don't worry about it Gordon I know you're sorry, I'll get over it." Alan mellowed slightly and half smiled at Gordon and Virgil.

"I take it that this forgiveness excludes me?"

Scott Tracy was sat in the chair, both Gordon and Virgil looked at him after he spoke, trouble was coming. Virgil nudged his brother and indicated to John that it was time to leave the room. Gordon did as suggested but John remained seated on the edge of his father's desk near Scott, but out of sight from Alan.

Alan looked down and thought deeply before responding.

"What do you want me to say Scott? That I can forgive and forget the look of hatred and disappointment you had for me. That you of all people couldn't try and see my side of the story even for an instant, that all that didn't affect me? It did. That you could think I would sell the dirt on this family just for revenge on dad makes me question whether you care at all Scott. You abandoned me when I needed you and I'm never going to forgive you for that." Alan voiced was raised and unusually for the blond there was such deep emotion embedded in his words. Alan looked up at the screen to see the hurt eyes of his eldest brother, he didn't mean the last bit he owed Scott so much and loved him like a father.

Scott Tracy was rarely speechless, but he couldn't find anything to say. Alan hadn't really been arguing with him so the eldest had no reason to doubt the meaningfulness of his brother's words. He worshipped the blond before him like know one knew, Scott Tracy swiftly left his seat and the room.

Alan Tracy was amazed by his brother's reaction, and felt guilty and apologetic when he saw his brother leave the chair. The blond sat in silence for minutes before John appeared in shot. Alan questioned what his brother would say, he expected an argument due to what he had just said to Scott, but truthfully he knew John so little that anything was possible.

"Did you mean that?" John spoke quietly and both blonds looked up to see each other.

"What do you want John?" Alan spoke softly, and John then knew he hadn't meant his previous words by his brother's inability to answer the question.

"Do you forgive me?" Alan was surprised by the question, and shrugged at first to create an answer.

"Sure." Alan had been angrier at his father and Scott than anyone else really.

"Even though I yelled at you about that article?" Alan again just looked unresponsive.

"We all make mistakes, I make hundreds, just ask dad for a list." Alan sounded disheartened and John noted his joking remark, he rarely saw Alan this way.

"Well I'm still sorry that I accused you so quickly, I just wanted to protect dad and in doing that I didn't think of you." John Tracy had missed seeing glimpses of his lost mother that Alan exposed and personified so much.

"John just forget it." Alan reinforced the issue. John always made him feel the same way his father did, as he knew John was reminded of his mom just by seeing him too.

"I'm not sure that dad or Scott will be able to forgive me for someone things I have said to them today though." Alan was unsure why he had confessed this to his virtual stranger of a brother.

"They will always forgive you Alan, you mean too much for them not too, no matter what you do or say. That's the same for all of us." John Tracy smiled at his little brother, and Alan failed to hide his surprised reaction to John's words. He owed his brother and his father an apology.

"Alan why don't we spend some time together when this is all over, I can come to a race if you want me to?" John's olive branch made the younger blond smile also, but John barely saw it as the screen went black.

"Alan." John spoke before trying to reconnect the link.

In the silence he could now hear his brothers arguing; Scott was trying to leave the house again to Virgil's annoyance.

"Gordon will you check the video caller in the next room." John yelled to his brother before moving out of the chair to examine the wires of the computer.

Scott and Virgil appeared at the door of the office while John was checking the machine; both looked confused by his actions.

"John what are you doing?" Virgil asked as he peered over the desk only to see John's legs coming out from under the desk.

"I was talking to Alan but the connection went dead, so I'm checking the link." Scott Tracy's worries only increased by this information, and Gordon appeared next to him.

"What the link just went dead?" John sighed, he had just said that.

"The one in the kitchen's working fine, why?" Gordon causally reported before he saw both his brothers hovering near the desk.

"I'm calling dad." Scott moved to reach the phone but his brother words stopped him.

"What the hell is this doing here?" John pulled out a small piece of technology and showed it to Virgil.

"What is it?" Gordon and Scott felt they had missed the point.

"It's a device used to steal corporate data usually, this is attached to the computer and the receiver to another and it allows you to access the machine and see and hear all the calls and emails." Virgil Tracy shot his brother a worried look.

"If someone has been hearing all the information we had said to dad about the project that's a big problem." Scott Tracy nodded.

"Wouldn't that mean they would also know all the information about Alan too?" Gordon pointed out to all of his brother's dismay.

"What's wrong?" Virgil Tracy noted the worried expression on his brother's face as he held the phone. Scott pressed more buttons before he spoke.

"Both dad and Alan's phones are disconnected, something's wrong." All the brothers shared a worried glance.

Alan Tracy looked down from the black screen to the keys on the video-caller, after trying to reconnect the call the lamp next to him went off as did the power feed. The blond only saw a shadow in the screen before he was held down and injected with a substance in his arm. Alan's head quickly swam and consciousness was now an impossible goal, the last thing he felt were his hands being tied together behind him.

Jeff Tracy felt exhausted and troubled as he climbed the stair back to the apartment he had left Alan in. As the lights went out on the stairwell the elder Tracy ran to the apartment, he knew this was no coincidence.

The apartment was nearly black and only the light cast in the room came from the street lights, Jeff entered the room and shouted his son's name but got no reply.

Jeff closed the door behind him before quickly crossing the hallway towards the study, he never made it.

"Jeff." Jeff Tracy instantly recognised the voice, however the ex pilot moved closer to the dining room as he made out a sight that would haunt him for a long time.

"Stop there." Jeff Tracy had a look of pure anxiety on his face as he noted the gun pointing at his youngest son, whom was tied to a chair and unconscious.

"Oh my god…Peter." Jeff Tracy's voice was breathless in confusion.

"What are you doing?" This time his voice was more firm and demanding.

"Sit down Jeff, and I will explain everything." Jeff was amazed by the casualness of Peter's tone.

"No, untie Alan now." The anger emanated from the billionaire and he moved a step closer.

"I said sit down." Peter's voice was now angry and he moved the gun to Alan's temple when Jeff attempted to move again.

"Alright." Jeff was struggling to understand the situation but moved to sit in the nearest chair, when he saw the seriousness in Peter's eyes and the gun at Alan's head.

"That's better; we need to talk, that's all just talk." Jeff nodded while he saw Peter move to large lit torch lamps onto the table and the bookshelf, the gun never leaving the target of his son.

"What are you doing Peter? Did you try and kill Alan?" Jeff question was said with such amazement and surprise. Peter casually continued his plan by checking the blond's ropes before getting out another needle.

"What are doing?" Jeff attempted to move again instinctively due to Peter's actions.

"Stay were you are Jeff!" Peter yelled at his boss and raised the weapon again to Alan's head. He calmly continued after composing himself.

"It's just something to wake Alan up, that's all I promise. You can trust me unlike your so called son, I wouldn't lie to you Jeff." Jeff Tracy was truly troubled by the words and actions he had just seen Peter make. The young man seemed so calm and decisive in his actions, but the look of pure resentment and hatred that he had for Alan when he spoke made him shiver.

Jeff thought quickly about his options while Alan began to regain consciousness, the elder man slipped his hand into his pocket but Peter saw it.

"You left your phone here Jeff when you went downstairs, so like Alan's I destroyed it. I don't want to be disturbed." Peter spoke like he was making a casual conversation but Jeff turned his attention to his now awake son.

"Alan."

"Alan wake up." The young man heard his father's voice but was confused why his arms wouldn't move and why his head was so heavy.

"Yes Alan wake up, we've got lots to talk about." Alan's sapphire eyes opened gradually and surveyed his situation with confusion.

Alan looked to the source of the voice and was slightly surprised by the man and gun he saw.

"Don't even try and move Alan." Peter sounded slightly delighted by the words he could say and the expression on his younger man's face.

"What's going on?" Alan tried to force his eyes to stay open, and fought against the call of unconsciousness.

"How are you feeling Alan? Tired, are you having trouble struggling to keep wake or knowing what's happening? You were the same way when I ran you off the road and gave you the first concoction of this, of course that had the kick of some recreational drugs in it." Peter moved so Alan could see him and the bottle of liquid in his hands, Alan met his father's eyes and felt such anger before struggling against his ropes.

"Where you in on this?" Alan shot the accusation his father's way, and Jeff looked at him with horror.

"Alan no, don't you ever think that?" Jeff spoke as Peter held Alan against the back of the chair and pushed the gun in to his neck.

"Don't move Alan unless you want proof this is loaded." Peter met the menacing eyes of the blond and Alan stopped resisting.

Peter walked behind the chair to face Jeff while allowing Alan to be still held at gun point.

"Your father had nothing to do with his Alan, but you thinking that he did is the reason why you're here." Alan was confused and looked at his father for clarification, Jeff looked just as unsure.

"What!" Alan yelled and pulled again at his bound wrists.

"Peter just tell me what you want?" Jeff Tracy swallowed and tried to calm himself down.

Peter smiled back at his boss before approaching him, the gun still aimed at Alan.

"I want to pay you back Jeff for all the compassion you gave me. You showed me such kindness and gave me the chance of a family that I have never had. You're like a father to me, and I want you to think of me as your son." Jeff looked up at the young man before him, his voice and expressions echoed of such admiration and gratitude.

"Peter you tried to kill Alan and you have a gun pointing at him, I'm not going to feel like that if you're doing this to my son." Jeff spoke slowly and clearly reasoning with Peter was going to be crucial. The elder man questioned his employee's mental health by the erratic actions and his wild variations in emotions.

"He doesn't deserve to be your son! He ran away from you, he lives with your enemy, and he hates you." Peter shouted and shot daggers of hate at the blond before moving to approach him again.

"All I ever wanted was a family, a mom, a dad, and a brother. You got all of those things and all you want is to get away from them. You don't deserve to be part of this family Alan but I do, and I would do anything for them." Alan struggled to hide his anger.

"What so all of this is because you resent me having my family?" Alan questioned.

"No. When I met your family you were already out of the picture, but not enough for me to take your spot. I wanted to make you suffer for hurting your family for being ungrateful. I wanted to show them who you really are Alan. When I found when I was moving some of your things, I knew I had the opportunity to get myself the family I always wanted and to teach you a lesson" Peter dropped a red leather book onto the table before Alan.

"Rachel's diary." Jeff looked up, and Alan saw the hint of panic in his eyes.

"You were right to try and kill him when he was baby Jeff, and I understand why you did it." Peter sounded sympathetic as he looked at Jeff, in comparison Alan's expression was only of shock by Peter's last words.

"What?" Alan spoke quietly and examined his father's body language; he was shaking his head but his eyes shone of guilt.

"That's not what happened, I didn't..." Jeff focused solely on Alan who now couldn't meet his eyes, but Jeff still spoke with such resolution.

"You don't need to believe me Alan, Rachel wrote it all down so you can see in the words of a woman who you loved so much. You were eight months old and it was the first time he had ever held you, Gordon was ill and Rachel was seeing to him, but you wouldn't stop crying. It's not your father's fault Alan, it's yours: you were hated so much by your family your father just wanted you out of his life." Alan's gaze was focused on the book before him on the table, deeply analysing Peter's words.

"Alan…no…that's not what happened." Alan looked up to meet his father's eyes, he looked defeated and emotional; two words Alan had never seen his father be. Alan's gaze only told the elder billionaire that his youngest son wanted the truth.

"I was distraught, I felt I had lost everything at that time of my life, nothing was the same when your mom died. My world was work and the boys, but accepting you would make Lucy's death so real so I hid from it. I left Rachel to look after you because I couldn't. That night I held you because your brothers were ill. I cut everything off around me and just fed you your bottle; you were wrapped up in a blanket and just looked so gorgeous." Jeff paused his eyes were on Alan but his son was struggling to comprehend that this information was true, his gaze was elsewhere.

"…I gave you your bottle without really looking at you, but then you looked up at me when you had finished and I saw your beautiful blue eyes, Lucy's blue eyes. In that instant I truly knew I had lost her, the only woman I had ever loved. I knew then my life would never be the same, and that I couldn't take back all those terrible last months of our lives together, I couldn't say I was sorry." Jeff's voice was barely a whisper; guilt hit the young blond again for the death of his mother. Both father and son had been running from this for so long, the truth was so painful to bare.

"Everything flooded my mind; I thought of Lucy, her life her death, everything we would never have, she would never see…" Jeff tried to find Alan's eyes as emotion cracked in his voice.

"…All I then knew was Rachel yelling, I had no idea I was holding you so tightly against me…you couldn't breath. Alan it was an accident, you don't know how much I regret that day…because I love you so much." Alan's head swam, he felt pain and regret and remorse and hatred all in one go.

The blond looked towards his father with a firmness and belief in his words.

"No I don't think you do." Alan shifted his gaze to Peter, he had almost forgotten the situation he was in while Jeff was explaining his actions, but the smile of revenge on Peter's face just caught the young driver's eyes.

"Your just loving this aren't you." Peter looked down at the angry eyes of Alan Tracy.

"I'm just giving you a taste of what you deserve, of what I have been though." Peter spat back from his position next to the younger man.

"What the hell have I ever done to you to deserve this? If you wanted my place in this family you're sure as hell welcome to it now." Alan shot that remark back at his father, and pulled again at his now aching wrists.

Peter sat down on the chair next to Alan and looked at him for a few moments.

"Don't try it Jeff this gun's still aimed at Alan's chest." Again the tone was casual and non aggressive as he warned the elder Tracy not to try anything, a dramatic divergence compared to his attitude with Alan.

"You have everything I ever wanted Alan, a family who will do anything for each other, you could have had the opportunity to go to a great college, and have an amazing career; things I couldn't have. Then there is the lavish lifestyle, the stunning girlfriend, your model looks; a perfect world." Alan didn't hide the laughter, and Peter looked only more resentful.

"So you tried to kill me because you're jealous, of some outsider's warped view of how my life is?" The disbelief was clear, but Jeff looked concerned by Peter's reaction to Alan's words.

"No." He yelled loudly.

"Peter please listen to me. Just stop pointing the gun at Alan and tell me why you did this?" Jeff Tracy stood up but spoke calmly, but Peter quickly reacted and aimed the gun back to Alan's head when Jeff moved closer.

Peter rubbed his eyes and head; he looked panicked and truly disturbed Jeff noted.

"I'm doing this for you." Peter's voice emulated a young child's and the look of longing in his eyes for praise and gratitude from Jeff was clear.

"You're psychotic." Alan fought his restraints as he spat his disgust at Peter's explanation.

"Alan." Jeff shot his son a warning glance at his choice of words, which he knew would only fuel Peter's actions.

"You teamed up with Richard Barton; he hated your family Alan, what type of a person does that?" Peter bellowed.

"You know nothing about my life, and nothing about Richard. I really don't think you have the right to condemn Richard because he has never tried to kill me, unlike you two."

"How could you turn your back on your family Alan when they lost their mother and wife because of you? You had everything Alan. I had no one in my life, no family, nothing, I was abandoned but I still love them. You deserve to be punished for that, to feel the hurt I felt. I'm doing this because your family is better off without you. I'm doing this Alan because this is what your father wants, to be rid of you." Peter spat at him with hatred and was desperate to see pain return to the younger man's eyes.

Alan's head fell, but he thought clearly before thinking.

"So you think that he is going to be the father you have always wanted after you get rid of me?" Alan's calm voice and lower tone surprised both the other men, and Peter questioned what he was doing.

"I don't think it would be long before those rose tinted glasses fall off. Do you know what it's like Peter to have four older brothers whom you're never going to match up too, but that your father will always judge you by? Do you really think he is going to spend time with you when he is at work constantly? Do you really think you will be his entire world? If you do you're a fool." Alan was riling Peter and Jeff saw it.

"Shut up, I'm not you; he will be different with me." Alan smirked and pulled slowly at his now looser restraints.

"Don't lie to yourself, I've tried that. His attention will always be on my brothers, and never on you or me, he's going to let you down because he let me down." Peter slammed his hand down on the table him to try and silence Alan.

"Shut up!" Peter yelled and focused his angry eyes at Alan with his back turned to Jeff, Alan continued in a powerful confident tone while Peter gazed down from above him the gun only inches from Alan's head.

"The worst thing is, you'll end up resenting him because he won't be the father you wanted and then you will find yourself in my position, and just like me you'll end up hating him." Alan spoke with passion.

Jeff had slowly been approaching Peter from behind as Alan had managed to keep Peter's attention, but his sons last words made the billionaire stop in his tracks, and Peter turned around at that point.

Jeff launched at Peter and struggled for the gun, Alan again pulled at his ropes but they failed to move. The gun fired in surprise to them all, and Jeff saw Alan's sweatshirt turn blood red.

"Alan."


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

Second Chances and Sacrifices

Alan Tracy could hear his own breathing and the depth and consistency of hearing it encouraged him to open his eyes. His head was slumped forward and his once grey sweatshirt was now a deep red, Alan felt a weight over his chest and turned to examine the source.

"Rick?" Alan spoke as the billionaire met his eyes before half moving half falling off the chair which was restraining the young blond.

"Rick?" Alan repeated his words and fought against his restraints as he watched his boss fall to the floor gasping with pain.

"Dad!" Alan looked up to the sound of the voice and felt relief as his brothers ran into the room.

"Virgil help him!" Alan yelled at his brother with panic in his voice.

"Alan are you okay?" The question came from his father who had snapped out of his shock of the gun being fired.

"Yeah." Alan spoke quickly his focus fixed solely on his boss.

"Dad you okay?" Scott Tracy approached his father with agitation, as the elder man picked up and disarmed the gun that had just gone off.

"Scott make sure he doesn't move!" Jeff looked down at a now bewildered Peter Hemmings; the young man was a heap on the floor after the shock of his actions.

Jeff made his way over to his other son's, whist Gordon untied Alan and helped him to his feet holding a percentage of his brother's weight.

"Alan." Jeff held his son in a similar pose to Gordon who was supporting the opposite side of Alan. Jeff's voice depicted relief but Alan paid him no attention, his mind was only on his second eldest brother who was hunched over Richard Barton.

"The police and ambulance are on the way." John shut off his cell phone and approached his father for a hug.

"Good, he's still losing a lot of blood and he's not fully conscious." Virgil reported in fully medical mode as he looked up at his family.

"Alan are you hurt?" Virgil diverted the attention back to the blond who had only just realised that Jeff and Gordon were holding him. Alan shook his head before pulling away from his father's grip, Jeff was about to protest but security entered the room and disrupted his thoughts.

"Virgil check Alan over, I'll deal with the police." Virgil nodded as an ambulance crew replaced his position and he approached his brother.

"Alan." Both his elder brothers now surrounded the blond whose eyes were examining Peter Hemmings who was being handcuffed and cautioned.

"You deserved this; you just destroy everything don't you?" The brown eyes of Peter Hemmings met the blue eyes of Alan Tracy; and the young driver suddenly really felt the affects of the past weeks hit him.

"You son of a bitch." Alan attempted to move towards Peter but his brothers held him back.

"Get him out of here." The eldest Tracy spat angrily, before he turned his attention back to his baby brother.

"Alan what happened?" Scott looked at the distant form of his brother, while Virgil eyed him over with worry.

"It was him, everything was him. The drugs, the car crash, the media leak." Scott sighed and leaned back against the cabinet behind them, in a similar pose to Alan.

"We know how he did it Alan, he was listening in to dad's calls and probably not just the ones he made at home I bet the office's are bugged too. That's how he found out about everything that only someone close to us would know." Virgil spoke with a disheartened tone and shared a look with Scott.

"Alan I'm so sorry we didn't believe you." The eldest Tracy rarely spoke with such regret and in a sombre tone.

"So am I." The blond turned to face his brother before approaching the ambulance crew, his face and emotions were neutral.

"Where are you going Alan?" Jeff moved away from the police as he noticed his son exiting the room following the ambulance crew.

"With Rick." Alan didn't even look at his father and continued his actions.

"Alan we can check on him later at the hospital, I don't want you leaving my sight." Jeff spoke casually and moved to embrace his son, but the young blond only moved away.

"Alan we need to talk about this, please..." Jeff pleaded but Alan only looked at him and then moved out of the door, Jeff attempted to follow but was held back by a hand on his shoulder.

"Let me go with him to the hospital, he needs to calm down dad. He's never going to talk to you when he's like this." Virgil calmly explained to his father as his other three brothers gathered around them.

"Alright, we'll meet you there." Jeff unwillingly backed down as Virgil nodded before he promised he would look after his baby brother.

Jeff Tracy was exhausted, he felt like he had aged ten years over the past few months and as he looked around the hospital room he was now in, he was staggered they were in this position at all.

"So Peter did all of this just because he resented Alan?" Gordon Tracy sat pondering the story his father had just told.

"Does it matter his reasons, he tried to kill Alan about four times? I would love to get my hands on him, he's hurt Alan too much to get away with it." Scott spoke with venom as he paced the room, the more his father had spoken about the events of the past hours the angrier he had gotten.

"The police will deal with Peter; he'll end up in jail for what he has done." John spoke more calmly than Scott, but the astonishment of the events was still clear in his voice.

"He drugged Alan twice, left him for dead in a burning car, and tried to shoot him; jail is too good for him!" Scott continued to pace.

"He is clearly psychologically disturbed, we just didn't see it." Virgil spoke from his seat between his brothers, wishing Scott would stop pacing and eying his father with worry.

"That's no excuse Virg, Alan has been seriously hurt and could have died." Gordon didn't mean to sound so condemning of Virgil's opinion, but he obviously hadn't succeeded by the look Virgil gave him.

"Dad are you okay?" Virgil decided not to start another argument and let Gordon's comment go with an annoyed look.

"It wasn't really Peter that hurt Alan was it? I looked at him Virgil and it wasn't Peter that he hated for this, it was me." Jeff Tracy looked up at his four sons they all looked confused by his words, and Scott had even stopped pacing due to them.

"What?" John asked confused by his father's idea.

"None of this would have ever happened if I had believed Alan when he said he hadn't given out details about this family to the press. Peter could never have taken things this far if we had trusted Alan's word, if I had believed my own son!" Jeff rubbed his face and eyes before getting up to relieve the tension he felt.

"Dad Peter Hemmings played on the fact you and Alan were having problems, this isn't your fault." Virgil tried to reason with his father.

"He hates me Virgil." Jeff Tracy spoke the words with a mixture of emotions. He craved Alan sometimes for the reminder of his wife, whilst other times he just couldn't stand to see the boy. However he was now willing to accept he had never managed to separate his feelings about Lucy from Alan.

The Tracy boys all shared a glace at each other as their father left the room.

"What a mess." John Tracy exhaled, as the eldest Tracy took his father's place in the chair.

"You can say that again." Gordon agreed.

"Did you two know about what dad did, you know…what he just said?" Gordon Tracy looked over to his two elder brothers who looked at each other before speaking; all of them knew Gordon was talking about the consequences of their father's breakdown.

"I remember Rachel was really protective of Alan, he did go everywhere with her for years before he started school, but no I didn't know the real reason why." Virgil explained while reminiscing on the early days of the Tracy boys.

"Grandma came to stay for about two months at that time, while Alan and Rachel stayed with her parents, dad went to therapy everyday but he said he couldn't be without us. I had a simple explanation from dad and grandma at the time, but after Rachel died I learnt everything dad just said. That's why I am so protective of him and try to god to keep some peace between the two of them, but it's impossible these days. Alan will not have taken this well that's for certain." Scott Tracy spoke calmly and evidence of military training was clear by his controlled attitude, but emotions always crept through when he was dealing with his family.

"Dad nearly suffocated him, how else can you take that idea?" Gordon got an angry look from his brothers in return for his words.

"Alan can't understand the situation and events that happened at that time dad was a mess back then; but he would never harm Alan purpose." Gordon visually backed down when Scott increased the volume and the forcefulness of his words.

"Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I just meant no matter what Alan throws back at dad for the last few weeks or how he'll try to shrug this off as nothing, it won't matter deep down this will have really hurt him." Virgil wrapped his arm around the shoulders of his younger brother.

"I know, I promise we will all try and fix this together as a family." Virgil smiled at John over Gordon's shoulders while comforting his younger brother. Scott Tracy too smiled in the sight of his brothers embracing, it had been a long time since all five of the Tracy boys had spent time together. The dark haired pilot indicated to his nearest brother his actions before he left the room.

"Dad?" Scott found his father outside of Richard Barton's room, the occupant of the room was still unconscious but recovering from surgery well according to the doctor.

Jeff turned as he heard his son. "They okay?" Scott curbed the urge to roll his eyes as his father spoke.

"You worry about us too much you know." Jeff smiled at that despite the situation.

"Firstly son, I'm your father so it's my job to worry, and secondly, you worry about them just as much as I do." Jeff put his arm on his son's shoulder in appreciation of that part of Scott's personality.

"Then how is our number one worry?"

"I'm just going to speak to him, that's if he will let me near him." Scott nodded as he and his father looked back into Barton's room.

"Dad there's something else." Jeff turned back to Scott, who looked around and lowered his voice despite the corridor being near empty before speaking.

"If Peter heard all your conversations over the past months he will have heard details about the project, dad we can't risk the police getting hold of that data." Jeff thought from a moment and the guilt that he had been the one to introduced Peter to his family resurfaced.

"Peter has been sectioned for now under the mental health act pending a psychiatric review, so even if he does say anything at the moment its likely they won't take him seriously. However I wouldn't mind finding out more about what he does know." Jeff paced the corridor as he thought, and Scott decided that he must tell Virgil that this preference for doing this was clearly hereditary.

"He may have recorded something? We need to check his belonging and the computers at the office before the police do." Jeff nodded as Scott point.

"Your right; he had a laptop as well make sure that's checked and take your brothers with you. I need to stay here with Alan." Scott angled his head slightly.

"Dad you need some sleep?" Scott argued but knew it was pointless.

"I'm not leaving Scott, I have to talk to him about this and explain things." The pilot saw the remorse and desperation in his father's expression.

"I understand that dad…just know this isn't your fault, no one knew what Peter was doing."

"Thanks Scott, but I'm not sure how true that is." Jeff turned back to his son and half smiled.

"You wouldn't mind keeping an eye on your brothers would you?" Scott scoffed as he walked off.

"As you said dad, I always do." Jeff watched his eldest son walk away and felt immense pride in him.

Jeff Tracy entered the darken room and was surprised to see the bed unoccupied, the billionaire quickly scanned the room to see if his son was present.

"He just left to speak to the police and have a nurse check him over." Jeff turned to the sound of the voice and was surprised to see Richard Barton on his feet.

The injured billionaire moved slowly to sit back on the bed; his arm was in a sling and was held closely to his body.

"Are you okay?" Jeff meant it sincerely despite his reservations about this man.

"Well I wouldn't recommend getting shot even to you, but I would do it all again to protect Alan." Richard looked across to Jeff; the argumentative aspect Jeff showed to him previously was gone.

Jeff Tracy exhaled before speaking, and looked intently at Richard Barton.

"Listen what has happened in the past between you and me concerning Lucy is something that I'm not going to forget or forgive. I still don't like you one little bit, and I'm sure that's mutual, but for protecting Alan from being shot… thank you." The billionaire spoke quickly but the sincerity was clear.

Richard studied the man before him, he hadn't expected a thank you, he thought Jeff's ego and hatred for him would have gotten in the way.

"Like I said I'll do anything to protect Alan, even die for him." Jeff nodded in appreciation and headed to leave the room, but he was stopped by Richard's next words.

"Do you even know what you have Jeff?" The billionaire turned back around and looked baffled.

"Meaning?" Richard paused before answering, he hadn't told anyone the truth about his past and he expected to tell this man the least.

"Scott, Gordon, John, Virgil…Alan, having had Lucy as your wife. Shall I tell you what you have Jeff? Everything I ever wanted" Richard's voice was deep but no spite or anger was present and Jeff was surprised by his honesty.

"I know you wanted my wife; that was clear when you asked her to leave me for you." Jeff had irritation back in his voice but Richard looked past that.

"That's not what I mean. Do you want to know the real reason behind wanting Alan so close to me?" Jeff moved away from the door as Richard retreated to look out of the window.

"To get back at me?" Jeff suggested.

"No, that was only a benefit of the situation."

"I wanted Alan because he gave me something I lost the opportunity to have a long time ago, a son." Richard's voice was soft but he was struggling to keep his composure by the mixture of emotions he was experiencing.

"You could have had kids with someone else besides Lucy?" Jeff was intrigued by the emotions Richard appeared to be feeling and the sombre expressions he was showing.

"No, not after my chance with Lucy I could face the idea again." Jeff Tracy looked confused.

"You're not making any sense. I know you dated Lucy before me but she was what…only eighteen, she probably didn't want a child so young." Jeff explained as he recalled the early days of he and his wife's relationship.

"Funny, because within a year of our split she was married and was pregnant with Scott; and then we find ourselves back at my original question.

Why you don't appreciate what you have Jeff?" Richard turned around to look at his fellow businessman.

"So you're angry at me for having Lucy and the kids? And you're angry at Lucy for picking me and not you? Is that it? All this with Alan just to settle your emotions for her leaving you?" Jeff questioned and met Richards's eyes with anger.

"This is pointless. I'm not going to apologize for having my family and just stand here and listen to you feel sorry for yourself for missing that chance." Jeff raised his arms in frustration and headed back to the door, but Richard moved to block his way and grabbed Jeff's arm with his healthy hand.

"What about Alan Jeff? What about how you have treated that kid? I may resent you for having the family I wanted but then having all that and treating Alan as you have is unforgivable." Jeff Tracy stared at the man before him, he spoke with such passion but a hint of despair was clear in his eyes.

Richard Barton let go of Jeff and walked back towards the window, anger still ran through his veins but he spoke calmly.

"How could you do it Jeff? How could not hold him? How could you not tell him about Lucy, and worse make him feel like he caused her death? How could you not love and appreciate him when I would have given the world to have that opportunity?" Jeff Tracy looked at Richard as he spoke and considered the idea that this man had once loved his wife very much.

"Alan and I have problems, but they're between us." Jeff Tracy exhaled and considered the questions Richard had posed while he moved to sit in one of the chairs.

"You can hate me for the damage I have done to Alan, but know that I feel the same way. If I knew back then what affect keeping Alan at arms length would do, don't you think I would never have let things get so bad? Things just spiralled after Rachel died and Alan became unreachable to me, it was too late." Jeff lent back into the chair contemplating how things could have been so different.

Richard Barton considered the actions he was about to take and knew he was about to sacrifice himself to benefit Alan again.

"I'm not going to pretend that you weren't crushed by Lucy's death and that Alan being so much like her wouldn't have been difficult for you at times, but making Alan feel the guilt he does about her death is despicable. "

"That's not true; I have never told Alan he is responsible for Lucy's death." Jeff Tracy interrupted Richard; his voice level matched his emotions.

"Then why does he think it? Do you even know that Alan doesn't even recognise his own mother, I showed him a photo of Lucy and he had no clue who she was." Richard spoke in barely a whisper and examined Jeff who lowered his head as shock racked his face.

"Lucy would have been devastated and have never recovered if Alan had died instead of her. She would never have had wanted this any differently, and if I have told Alan anything it's that." Richard moved again this time turning his back too Jeff.

"While she was dying she was fixated with Alan being okay wasn't she?" Jeff Tracy considered the question he had been asked, but more why this man sounded so confident that he was right.

"Yeah… she spoke to all the boys and me, but she desperately wanted to know that Alan was alive and well. She saw him briefly in an incubation unit but he was too sick for her to hold him, so I promised her I would hold him for her…but I never really managed to keep that promise." Jeff Tracy's voice cracked with emotion.

"She would have never wanted to put him down. Those intoxicating cerulean eyes, the swifts of blond locks, the cheeky dimples; she would have been hooked in an instant…as she was with her first son…our son." Richard still had his back to Jeff and so missed the total look of amazement and confusion on his face.

"What?" Richard turned around and Jeff feared this was the truth by the look in his eyes.

"About a year before Lucy had Scott we had a child together, a son. I know she never told you about him, when she was pregnant with Alan she told me that she just couldn't find the words to say it. She never managed to deal with that loss." Richard broke into a half smile at the memories of her being pregnant with Alan but Jeff still saw a raw ache in his eyes.

"When he was born he was perfect. I watched Lucy hold him first, she held his little fingers and ran her finger over his nose…she just fell in love with him in that instant. Then I held him…our son, my son…I never thought I could love something so much. For that moment I had everything I could ever have dreamt of. I had Lucy, our child, a future. Four hours after he was born I held my beautiful son again but this time I felt nothing, my future was gone, he had died in my arms." Jeff Tracy lost any doubt about the accuracy of this story in that moment and was stunned by Richard's words.

"What happened?" Jeff felt empathy for the man before him and showed it in his voice; he was also stunned to learn something new about his late wife.

"The doctors didn't really know, it was to do with his breathing. That was it he was gone, Lucy and I were both consumed by our grief and so we grew apart…then she met you." Minutes passed when neither spoke, both men dealing with their emotions. Richard again took stock of the new waves of pain he was feeling before returning to his point.

"That's why I know how desperately Lucy wanted Alan to survive; she couldn't lose another child, it would have killed her." Jeff nodded slowly and re-examined the events surrounding his youngest child's birth with new eyes. Richard Barton's voice and persona became more composed before continuing his story.

"His name was Mathew Richard Barton, born June 17th; feel free to check on my story." Richard met Jeff's eyes and he noted that Jeff looked sympathetic.

"She was always so protective of them, checking on them in the night all the time; she was always so caring and worried about them so much when they were sick. I never really knew why." Jeff explained as he slotted Lucy's experiences in with her behaviour with their children, before he came to a realisation.

"Blond hair, blue eyes…he was just like Alan." Jeff spoke with a new understanding of Richard's behaviour as the billionaire nodded and sat back down on the bed.

"When I saw Alan for the first time I just couldn't get over the resemblance to Mathew, but there was more. In Alan I could see and have things I never got with him. I watched Alan play soccer, saw his character develop, learnt what he loved to do, I found another chance to have the son I lost. I kept my eye on Alan over his life, but nearly a year ago I found him needing a father as much as I need a son, so I intervened. " Richard smiled.

"It was you that blacklisted Alan with the F1 companies and then bought out the Mercedes McLaren team; you offered him a job so you could see him more." Jeff retraced Richard's past actions.

"This last year has been the best time of my life since I held Mathew and Lucy last. Alan's amazing, he's caring and loyal, hardworking and cheeky and…and just like his mom. It my have been selfish but I got part of Mathew and Lucy back through Alan. At first I thought I could help him too. That I could fill your role, and be his father but lately I realised that he can't let go of you. I wanted him to hate you and resent you and turn to me to be his father wholeheartedly, but the fact is he still wants you Jeff." Jeff Tracy was surprised again by Richards's words, and did question the sincerity of these this time.

"So you're saying despite you doing everything to split me and Alan up and make things worse between us, you have suddenly decided that Alan still wants me to be his father?" Richard understood the query.

"I didn't know then what I know now." Jeff asked no more about that answer, despite the double meaning Richard meant by it.

"Alan wouldn't be so upset about what you thought of him Jeff if he didn't want you in his life."

Richard explained but Jeff considered the past months events and lost for ideas for how to move past them with Alan.

"You have to be honest with him Jeff he deserves to know the truth, and he needs to hear it from you." Richard advised as he sensed Jeff's dilemma.

"I need to tell him things that I never have before, I need to make things right between us, we just can't continue this way." Jeff Tracy moved out of his chair and digested the emotions and knowledge he had given and received.

Richard Barton looked at Jeff again, he had hated him for a long time, he was a man who had opportunities he never had, a man he resented.

"If I get Alan to speak with you and convince him to give you a second chance, Jeff you better swear on Lucy's grave that you won't let him down again. That you won't let things get this bad again." Jeff Tracy turned around as he heard the governance and resolve increase in Richards's voice.

Jeff nodded in reply and began to move towards the door.

"Why would you do that though?" Jeff stopped by the bed and ask Richard the question puzzling him, Richard stood to answer him.

"This is for Alan's sake not yours. Give me half an hour with him and then I'll leave so you can talk to him." Jeff nodded and opened the door, despite his feelings still about this man, he felt obliged to show gratitude for Richard telling him the truth.

"For what it's worth having Alan refer to you as 'dad' clearly shows that you would have been a fantastic father to your son…" Jeff breathed deeply but still faced away from Richard and looked out to the corridor.

"…and Lucy will have been grateful for you helping Alan." He added.

Richard Barton watched his fellow billionaire move out of the doorway and down the corridor. He didn't doubt Jeff meant those words but was stunned he had the audacity to say them.

Jeff Tracy lent his arms against the cold brick walls of the hospital; the cold air was refreshing and helped him cope with the extended loss of sleep he had experienced over the past nights. The billionaire again ran over the events of the past hours, he could never have expected such a 'heart to heart' with Barton and still was amazed by the information he had learnt. However Alan was his key importance, he scanned his watch and then examined the sky around him; it was the early hours of the morning. Barton could have his half an hour and Jeff pulled out Scott's cell phone to make an important call.

"Is it done?" It was a firm and unyielding question to the speaker on the other end.

"Yes sir. As you requested all evidence has also been deposited of to the correct location, and no clue left. He ordered a car to be sent to the hospital in forty minutes time to take him home." The man reported firmly to his boss on the other end of the line, his identity unknown to him.

"Good. You're payment will be sent to you personally within the day." The smirk was key to the man's fate; and the cell phone call ended on that note.

"Times up Richard."

Alan Tracy walked back into the room that he had left his boss in and was surprised to see the man in question ending a cell phone call as he stood by the window.

"Should you be up and dressed? You did get shot today or yesterday maybe by now." Alan asked as he closed the door behind him.

"It was only in the shoulder muscle, don't worry." Alan looked unconvinced though.

"Anyway I'm going to go home in a few minutes and get some rest, doctors orders." Richard indicated to Alan to sit down on the bed while he pulled up the chair to be nearer too him.

"Okay if they say you're alright to leave then I'm ready when you are?" Richard dipped his head if he thought the last conversations was difficult, it would be nothing compared to this.

"Alan…" Richard looked up and Alan's baby blues stared right back at him; he was then reminded why he was doing this.

"Alan you're not coming home with me; I think you should go home with your father." Richard saw the query of whether he was joking ponder in the young man's eyes, so he decided to expel that first.

"I'm not joking Alan, I mean it. You at least need to listen too what he has to say."

"What...What has happened in the last six hours, this afternoon you hated him? What about all that he has done, am I just supposed to forget it?" Alan's voice was raised and he even wondered if to call a nurse due to the change in his friend's persona.

"Alan you know I still think your father is complete…" Richard looked at the blond again and Alan tilted his head to make a suggestion.

"…anyway that's irrelevant at the moment. Jeff has made a lot of mistakes with you, ones that even Lucy would have hated to see him make, but he is still your father and you need him Alan." Richard spoke softly and put his healthy hand over Alan's.

"I've got you; you're great with me and..." Richard inhaled and tried again.

"Alan it's not enough I can't be him. I've seen you Alan with him and whether you want to admit it or not his opinion matters to you." Alan looked lost by the idea.

"He called me a liar and accused me of betraying him; he's ignored me for years for god's sake!" Alan moved from Richard's grasp and across to the other side of the room.

"I know and I hate the idea he did that, but…if you had the chance to put things right you would take it Alan, I know you would. Part of you is desperate for the relationship with Jeff that your brothers already have." Richard lent back in the chair and watched the young man before him.

"Alright, maybe I would prefer to have a better relationship with him, but have you tried to get on with him lately? You know what he's like, were on opposite ends of the spectrum…and he doesn't want me." Richard knew the boy was speaking without thinking and the honesty Alan was showing was an example of how close they were.

"If he did, if the two of you could make a fresh start…" Richard moved to his feet and approached Alan he raised the boy's head to look into his eyes.

"…You wouldn't turn that down would you?" Alan surrendered to the emotions he was feeling.

"No, but…what has brought this on? Why are you sticking up for him?" Alan looked for the answers in the brown eyes of his companion.

"I spoke with him; actually I learnt more about Jeff Tracy in the last hour than I have my whole life. I yelled at him for treating you as he did, but more importantly Alan I reminded him of the gift he got by having you as his son." Richard felt the cheek of the young man before him and then pulled him into a hug.

"Are you okay?" Alan returned the embrace while he spoke.

"Fine… I just need to back off a bit. You need to give your dad a second chance Alan."

The young blond was still amazed Richard was continuing with this idea.

"A second chance! Why after everything should I?" Alan knew his anger was aimed incorrectly but he was becoming tired of the same discussion.

"You're mom that's why; she wouldn't want the two of you to be so far apart. Nineteen years ago your mom gave me a second chance Alan, so learn from her and just give Jeff an opportunity to explain himself." Alan seemed to soften again by the idea Richard posed.

"Alan I know you want an explanation to why some of the things in your life have happened this way. Jeff can give you the answer to those questions. I'm not saying give him an easy ride or forgive him easily; I just can't stand in the way of the only chance of you having a parent Alan. If I did your mother would never forgive me for it." Alan moved again out of Richard's proximity.

"So what the past year of me being like your son was just a pet hobby that your now bored of now or something? You're fed up of me so you're sending me home." Richard turned quickly at the accusation.

"No Alan, it's not like that. You mean more to me than you ever could know but…" Richard exhaled in frustration.

"I'll still be keeping an eye on you Alan I promise, but if I don't do this Lucy would hate me for it." Richard moved towards the bedside table to pick up his wallet and phone.

"He loves you Alan."

"Yeah well he doesn't show it or say it." The blond watched as Richard approached the chair he was sat in, he noted the mood of the young blond was depressed and tentative.

"That's because he's scared. He doesn't want to expose himself to the pain that he felt by losing Lucy. Somehow we think if we hide are feeling from people then we can act like they're not real, and that if we expose the truth to the world then we are more likely to lose the things we hold most dear." Alan digested the knowledge and looked back at Richard.

"I love you son." Richard again wrapped his arms around Alan intently before he moved to leave the room.

"Rick…" Alan approached him.

"I love you too." Richard smiled and nodded, his words were appreciated more than Alan knew.

"I'll see you soon. Do this for your mother Alan, please." Richard took in the slight of the young man before him with such pride and love.

"Bye Alan."

Richard Barton closed the door and walked away, he didn't let himself look back to see what he was leaving behind.

Alan Tracy sat slumped in the armchair in the corner of the dark room, his body ached and his head pounded, but he was ignoring it all as the last half hours conversation ran through his mind. He kept re living the last conversation because part of him was shocked that it had really happened. He questioned again if he had done something to upset Richard, but was unsure of that answer also.

Alan smirked and rubbed his eyes before he laid his head back on to the top edge of the chair. After the past weeks did he really need to think hard for a reason why Richard just seemed to have left him? He tried hard to believe that he had meant more to Richard than that, but he failed.

"Jesus I introduced a drug yielding manic into his life and then got him shot! Let's guess some more while he left you!" The sarcasm didn't help the sadness he was feeling.

"Great Alan now you've got rid of everyone in your life and so you're stuck talking to yourself!"

Alan considered his father's and brother's theory that trouble just seemed to follow him no matter what. Part of him didn't blame Richard if he did wanted to end their relationship, he only seemed to bring difficulties whether that was his father or by Peter. Although another part of him wanted to believe that Richard felt he owed it to his mother to let him and his dad try and mend this rift. Alan believed the torn and sincere look in his bosses' eyes when he told him he wanted to leave by himself, but still he felt like there was something else wrong.

Alan didn't get much further in his thoughts though as his father entered the room with a hint of worry hanging on his features.

"You okay?" Jeff Tracy noticed his son in the darkened room and entered swiftly.

Alan raised his head as the door opened but as a wave of nausea hit him and he regretted doing it so fast.

"I suppose." Alan really didn't know where to go now with his father, and the exhaustion shone in his words.

Jeff Tracy noted his son's attitude before shutting the door behind him; he paused and took in Alan's demeanour before speaking again.

"What did the doctor say?" Jeff moved closer to his son, and examined Alan in more detail.

"Oh they said I'm doing well despite three counts of attempted murder being aimed against me. I'm surprised you're even here and not posting Peter's bail." Jeff shook his head in respond and the young blond looked over at his father.

"Alan how can you say that?" Alan heard the disbelief in his father's tone; he knew that he had said that for a cheap shot at his father. In that instant he realised Richard was right. Only Jeff had the answers to questions he wanted and he knew this was getting them nowhere, but this relationship was only what he knew with his father.

"What did you say to Rick? As he has decided that I should be going home with you not him all of a sudden." Alan ignored the question Jeff asked previously and focused on the answers he wanted. Jeff looked surprised by this information.

"We talked that's all, he said he would try and get you to talk with me. I didn't talk him in to making you leave with me if that's what you meant." Jeff sat on the end of the bed in a similar position to what his fellow billionaire was in barely an hour ago.

"It wasn't, it's me you have to talk into that." Alan smirked at his father, and Jeff met his eyes.

"Well does that mean your going to let me explain things?" Jeff quizzed and Alan stood up and approached the window.

"Fine, I'm listening. Please explain things to me. Explain why the hell someone who was trying to kill me not only worked for you but also lived with you, in my bedroom nevertheless." Alan kept his composure but anger seeped in his words.

"Alan I didn't know what was happening and I had no clue Peter was that unstable and disturbed. John found a transmitter on my computer, Peter had been listening

to every call I made, that's how he knew about everything that was happening between us." Jeff also remained calm, but couldn't help but feel foolish that he had been oblivious to Peter's real motives.

"Well you should be more careful, maybe do backgrounds checks or something next time you replace me." Alan's tone was humorous, but the meaning of the joke wasn't lost on Jeff.

"I couldn't… and I didn't replace you Alan." Jeff exhaled, it hurt him to think Alan thought that.

"I just…expected you to come back, and you didn't. So with your brothers in training, and being scattered across the country I just found myself coming home to an empty house every night. I can't remember a time that I lived the house without anyone else and then suddenly there I was, on my own. Alan I met Peter and gave him a chance to work in the business, he had no family and I thought I could help him. He was only planning to stay with me for a few days, but having him there remained me of what it was like to have you and your brothers with me again. I never even imagined that he would try and think he could take your place; Alan Peter is psychologically troubled, I just missed it." Jeff looked at his sons back and considered what Alan was thinking.

"Fine Peter's kind of insane I get it, but please don't paint a picture like things would have been great if I hadn't left. I have spent barely two years living in that house since I was eleven, and in that time you were at work constantly and when you weren't we were none stop arguing." Alan turned his head as he explained to his father his alterative take on their past.

"I'm not saying things have been great between us Alan, but they were better than they have been in the past year. Alan you left without even a goodbye and I didn't know where you were for over six months!" Alan rolled his head at the unsurprising destination they had arrived at.

"Are you ever going to let this go?" Alan turned fully and his voice was raised in annoyance, in reply his father only seemed to look at him in disbelief.

"Alan did you really think I wasn't worried about where you were every single day? You didn't touch your bank account; or tell me where you were staying or if you were safe. Alan you may have been angry at me, but a phone call to let me know you were alright really would have been appreciated." Alan tried to ignore the sincerity that Jeff visualised in his face and words.

"No it didn't cross my mind to call you. The fact that we had a massive argument and you didn't care what I wanted, because you were too focused on what you wanted kind of took over."

"Alan I'm not blaming you but we can't keep going over mistakes that both us have made. We need to move forward, to make things better together. I won't let things stay this bad between us son. I know I can't mend things over night, but I need you to know that I'm so sorry for the last few months and years…and for what you learnt today."

"Right…so let's think about what I learnt today… you tried to kill me." The last few words were spoken with a forced neutral tone.

"Alan…son I wish I could explain, but I don't even know myself…I would never ever hurt you." Jeff relived the fractured memories of the events but saw Alan seemed less the impressed by his reasoning.

"Then just don't bother explaining." Alan quickly moved towards the door in annoyance but Jeff reacted fast and moved in front of his son's path.

"Listen to me please Alan; we're never going to move forward otherwise." Jeff tried to meet his son's eyes but could sense Alan's discomfort at him being so close. The realisation that Alan didn't want him to touch him hit the billionaire hard.

"Just don't. I can't do this, I can't listen to your excuses. I understand it was difficult for you but... you never seem to have these problems with Gordon or John or anyone but me." Alan walked back towards the window sighing with exhaustion.

"I was just holding you close to me and then everything overtook me, I just forgot you were there. I would never ever do that on purpose, you have to believe me." Jeff sounded almost desperate and Alan was taken aback by the pleading nature of his father but didn't show it.

Jeff approached Alan from behind and put his arm around the blonds' shoulders as Alan rubbed is eyes again.

"Come here." Jeff pulled Alan close to him and embraced him in a hug; Alan fort the urge to resist successfully, but didn't return the gesture either.

Jeff Tracy held his youngest child and reacted to all the worry about Alan's safety in the force and nature of his embrace.

"Your mom would have killed me for letting things get so bad between us." Alan again didn't speak although this time it was due to the pain in his head distracting him.

"Alan I wish I could go back and change the mistakes I've made, but this isn't a story Alan this is real life and they don't give you a rewind button. God I wish they did. I have made a lot of errors in my life Alan, and most of them focused around you and your mom." Jeff Tracy examined the floor as he spoke; he knew this should have been said so many years ago.

"I should have brought you up when you were little, and I didn't. I ran from my own guilt and pain and I focussed on my work, but whenever I saw you everything hit me so hard." Alan was doing his best to block his own emotions, and stop the release of his anger and guilt that he felt. He again walked away from his father.

"So what about Scott, Virg, Gordon and John, do they not remind you of anything?" If the young blond had wanted to hide the resentment he felt at being the left out son he failed in Jeff's mind. The billionaire considered his son's emotions. The answer to Alan's question was easy, but Jeff decided he had never considered that Alan resented his brothers because of his own actions.

"Alan please don't resent your brothers because of what I have done. When I was with your brothers it was just like your mom was out or that I was taking them to school while she was at home. I could live like nothing had changed, but seeing you and holding you meant I couldn't do that. Reality hit me because I had nowhere to run with you." Alan couldn't look at his father despite Jeff looking right at him.

"By the time I knew it you were nearly eleven, Rachel had cared for you all those years and I had wasted so much time with you, and I only really realised that the day Rachel died. When I heard you call her mom, I saw that I had let you grow up in a fragmented family. I realised that none of us had pieced back together this family despite your mom having died over a decade ago. I had to force myself to try and put back together this family and that included you Alan. So in that moment I stopped Rachel from taking you with her on holiday."

"Don't worry I haven't forgotten. It was the last time I ever saw her if you recall, you dragged me off her despite me having no idea what was happening." Jeff looked up as Alan spoke with anger at his actions on that day. Jeff saw his son was blaming him for not being with Rachel when she died.

"Alan if I hadn't done that you would have died that day on that plane with Rachel." Jeff tried to reason this with his son but all Jeff saw was a small glimpse of the pain his son had about Rachel's death.

"I did try and help you after she died, but you cut me off Alan. You were so far apart from me and there was nothing I could do that could make you open up to me. You clung to Scott but you still wouldn't speak to him about everything, and if I thought it was bad then it only really got worse didn't it." Jeff looked paused in thought but turned around when he realised Alan hadn't replied but his mind filled with concern as Alan was holding his head.

"Alan are you okay?" Jeff moved over to Alan and placed his hand on his son's forehead as the blond fought the wave of nausea that hit his stomach.

"Just a headache." Alan tried to focus his balance without his father realising his dizziness, but Jeff held his arm indicating that he had failed.

"Alan you're burning up, what did the doctor say?" Alan was at least willing to admit to himself that he craved the peace and serenity of sleep, but not to his father who again repeated his previous question.

"Just to rest and sleep it off." Alan still had his eyes shut, and Jeff moved even closer to his body and Alan found himself leaning on him slightly.

"Well at least I'm not the only one you don't listen too." Jeff smirked and Alan opened his eyes to appreciate the sarcasm being aimed his way.

"Come on sit down." Jeff directed Alan back towards the bed and sat beside him.

In the time that had passed since being held hostage by Peter Jeff had constantly had the same words Alan had spoken to him running around in his mind. Alan opened his eyes and he focused his vision before noting that Jeff seemed distant, but what intrigued the driver was the hurt expression haunting his features.

Jeff snapped out of his memories of the last hours to see Alan looking at him, he knew he had to have the answer he seeked.

"Did you mean it? Do you really hate me Alan?" Alan looked at the man beside him, he knew him in a variety of lights. Jeff Tracy astronaut and distinguished pilot. Jeff Tracy billionaire and world renowned business man. Jeff Tracy widow and single father of five boys. However Alan admitted he had also seen Jeff Tracy, caring and loving father, and this side of him had been shown to both his brothers and himself. However when it version of his father was aimed at him a part of his father seemed so lost. When Jeff had tried to be a loving father to him regret and sorrow also accompanied his role. He saw it when he woke up from a serious bout of meningitis when his father brushed his hair off his face and hugged him. A worried and caring father was there in that moment, but so was a man scared by memories that he was inducing just by his resemblance to his mother. Just by seeing the pain he brought to his father over the years encouraged him to keep his distance, hoping that in this way he could protect himself and his father.

Alan looked at his father and waited to see the same hurt but it wasn't there. Jeff Tracy his father was before him, but he seemed to be thinking of him solely and wasn't haunted by other memories. Alan seemed utterly in disbelief by the change in nature of Jeff Tracy.

"Alan?" Jeff spoke again after minutes of silence between them, and somehow that made him feel more nervous of the answer.

"No." There was an honesty and innocent in his son's words that Jeff needed not to question the truthfulness of them.

"That doesn't mean that things are even okay with us though, I don't even know where we go from here." Alan considered that he had made up after arguments with his father before but the understanding and peace often didn't last that long.

"Well it could start by us trying to get along a bit better, that would be nice."

"What you mean be coming home, quitting racing and doing what you want me to do?" Alan had slipped into the bad habit of expecting an argument again.

"No, I thought I could just spend some time with you?" Alan had a sceptical look on his face that Jeff saw clearly.

"Rick. What about him?"

"Alan I can't stop you seeing him, and for what it's worth the man just got shot protecting you. He must at least have one redeeming quality." Alan looked shell shocked.

"What, I'm missing something right? Rick tells me to go home to you, and your basically singing his praises compared to two months ago." Jeff looked at Alan before remembering that Richard had told Alan nothing of the events surrounding his and Lucy's son, and so for the moment Jeff respected that decision.

"He just showed me that I should be thankful for each of you boys and that I should never take you for grated." Jeff moved his chair closer and placed his hand on his sons shoulder, surprising the blond.

"I can't go through anything like that again you know, seeing you being held at gun point was one of the most terrifying moments of my life, and it's my fault it happened. Alan I just though I could help Peter I never ever tried to replace you and I never could." Alan nodded, and Jeff realised that it was going to take a lot longer than one conversation for the two of them to get back on some form of neutral ground.

Alan unconsciously braced himself against the pain that again rippled through his head and made his body ache, but this time it was too much for the elder Tracy to put up with.

"Come on I'm taking you home, you need to rest." Alan concurred as his head spun.

"Fine, I'll stay with you for one night, but I want to see Rick first and this doesn't mean that I'm about to forget everything that has happened." Alan raised his voice slightly as a warning sign and Jeff acknowledged it.

"Right now I'll take anything. Come on." Jeff smiled and stood before offering his hand to help Alan up who hesitantly took it.

Despite it being nearly eight o'clock in the morning Virgil noted the dark gloom that hung in the air both physically outside and emotionally inside the Tracy home. His two younger brothers had been asleep for a few hours now relieved to hear that Alan was okay and that their father was with him at the hospital. Unlike them though the two elder Tracy sons had no ability to sleep until there father was home, and hopefully Virgil wished Alan also.

As the young brown eyed man walked down the stairs and headed towards the kitchen he adjusted his now slightly damp t-shirt and considered the events of the past twenty four hours. All his feelings and thoughts about the events of the past months came to a head when he saw his elder brother staring at a computer screen in his father's office.

"Scott I thought you were taking a shower as well?" Scott Tracy raised his eyes to the source of the voice, and Virgil Tracy saw instantly his brother's state of mind.

"What are you doing?" Virgil moved to a position where he saw he could see the screen of the laptop while he elder brother lent back into the leather chair.

"You managed to get into it then?" Virgil had wondered why when leaving the hospital Scott had stopped at Tracy Tower but Scott had soon explained that his father wanted them to find Peter's laptop.

"Yep, I used the software." Scott indicated to the box of disks positioned on the wooden desk, they were a computer hackers dream.

"And?" Virgil was engrossed in the surprisingly muted nature and contemplating attitude that his brother was manifesting at this moment.

"There's not that much really in the way of documents, a diary that basically storks all of our movements and actions, and a large collection of media files. It's a disturbing insight into the mind of crazed psychopath though; he was obsessed with what dad was saying about him and what he was doing. There is literately hours and hours of recordings of dad on the phone, he must have heard nearly every conversation that went on between dad and us and he recorded it all." Virgil felt a cold shiver run down his spine, it made him feel extremely uneasy to see the ravings of a disturbed mind as he glanced over the diary.

"Dad had conversations and meetings with other people not just us in the past year, does he has a copy of all of them?" Virgil questioned.

"He sorted the files in to groups, whether it was work or family, he even when so far as to label conversation by what was the main topic. Looking at the number of times he has listened or watched some of them he had tended to focus us rather than the business. He even deleted some of the early recording of dad's business conversations I found some in the recycle bin they were deleted months ago." Scott's sombre tone continued.

"That's slightly good news right? It must mean he doesn't know anything about the project, or nothing substantial that he has been looking in to further anyway." Virgil suggested but Scott looked no more pleased by this idea.

"He puts something in his diary about finding out what the two of us are doing and wonders what the project is, but there is nothing concrete that he has. He was more interested in our family." Virgil followed Scott's eye line as saw he was staring at the screen which was open on the media player with video mode selected.

"What did you mean by the number of times he had watched something?" Scott looked across to his younger sibling and Virgil got more disturbed by his expression.

"Scott?"

"By the looks of it he has been able to feed a link into his laptop from the CCTV in dad's office. Despite that he has only one saved file of what must have been months of video feed that he had access too. The same recording has been watched over three hundred times."

"Well, what is it?" Virgil moved position to access the computer more but Scott put his hand on his arm to stop him and Virgil looked up to see the angry cobalt eyes of Scott Tracy.

"I must have watched it about ten times already, but every time I watch it I just can't believe how he manipulated us into not believing Alan. How could I let him do this to my family, to Alan? How could I let my baby brother down so much?"

Scott got up from the chair; and Virgil paused again for a moment and considered his brother's behaviour before playing the recording. At first the young man only saw the image of his father's office but as he scanned the date of the recording he realised this was the time when Alan first visited his father in New York all those months ago.

Scott Tracy listened again to the recording that he had previously heard for the past hours as he stared out of the window. As his eyes examined the garages that accompanied the house he again thought of his youngest brother and why he was so protective of him.

"_Scott, Scott…Scott!" The voice was almost deafening and the eldest Tracy brother knew the source instantly but was surprised to hear it. _

"_Alan calm down. I heard you the first time and the rest of the planet heard you by the third time!" The baby faced blond haired boy stopped instantly ending his race to catch up with his eldest brother. _

"_Sorry." The boy's blue eyes dropped instantly, and Scott felt guilt hit him for making his brother sad again. The eleven year old had been miserable and uninterested in anything for the past year, since Rachel had died. Alan seemed utterly traumatised by the event and would often just sit for hours just playing with his model cars not saying a word to anyone. The boy seemed oblivious to his father and brothers worries, and their actions to help him had all failed. The elder Tracy's were considering if the young boy would ever find a way to cope with his loss. Scott Tracy therefore was totally taken aback by the change in behaviour of the same young boy before him. _

"_No don't be sorry, it's okay kiddo. I'm just a little surprised you're so upbeat and talking, but that's good to see I was so worried about you." Alan looked puzzled by his brother's words at first, before remembering how long Scott had been trying to get him to leave his bedroom or just to talk to him._

_The young boy just shrugged and the sadness returned to his crystal blue eyes but Scott enclosed his brother with a hug to help him._

"_Hey its okay Alan, I'm here." Alan nodded and Scott noticed again that no tears had fell despite the sadness his brother clearly felt. _

"_What did you want anyway that was so urgent mate?" Scott hoped the happier little boy that was running towards him a few minutes ago would reappear; he did slightly._

"_I wanted a go!" Scott Tracy stood up to his full height and smirked before following his brother's eye line; he should have known._

"_Alan you're eleven, it's never going to happen little brother, and even if you weren't eleven it's still never going to happen." The fair haired eleven year old didn't look impressed by that idea and glared up at his older brother in response._

"_But I really want to!" The puppy dog eyes appeared as Alan remembered Scott had fallen for on so many occasions in the past. _

"_When you're fifteen you can have one, well maybe not one of these but?" Alan Tracy exhaled in a frustrated way and moved away from Scott to admire his brother's twenty first birthday present from their father._

"_Okay, just let me look at it." The youngest Tracy's eyes examined the gift before him with fascination and delight, the sadness in his life seemed almost forgotten in this moment._

_Scott Tracy watched the events before him and realised that this was one of the best birthday presents he had ever received, I smile on the face of his baby brother who's life had been scarred by sadness. He again renewed his promise to his mother than he made when she died, to care and love his baby brother. He also thanked her for the final gift she had given this family, Alan Tracy._

_When Jeff Tracy returned home on the evening of his eldest's sons twenty first birthday Scott barely noticed his father's arrival from his position on the side porch._

"_Scott? What are you doing out here son?" The young man turned to see his father before indicating him to come closer. _

_The young air force pilot hoped his father would get the same source of happiness and hope from seeing what he had watched for the past hours. Scott smiled as he noted the amazement of the face of his father as they both watched the eleven year old play._

"_You managed to get him outside?" Jeff quizzed his son in shock but still didn't take his eyes off his youngest son._

"_Yep, he was talking and even smiling but it wasn't really me that did it." Jeff did this time take his eyes off his son but only to look at his other son next to him. The worry of Alan's despair faded slightly in the billionaires mind and he was again grateful for Scott's assistance with Alan. _

"_He might never get over Rachel, but I think today Alan finally found a good way to remember her and a way to help him cope without her." Scott smiled before both men looked out towards the garages where a young Alan Tracy played and dreamed as he sat at the wheel of his brother's sports car._

Scott Tracy was snapped back into reality by this brother's words and the ending of the recording.

"Peter played on Alan's fears of what dad thought of him. Alan never did anything that we though he did." As Virgil heard the words he had spoken he realised why his brother was so distant.

"I broke my promise Virg, and I have been doing for years. I should have made Alan open up to me about Rachel, and dad and everything; if I did things wouldn't have gotten so bad. I know Alan's not perfect and that he can wind us all up. He should never have run away or caused mayhem at school, but we had ten years with mom in our lives, Alan never even got a minute." The two elder Tracy sons shared a look, none of them would swop an instant with their mother for anything.

"Scott you couldn't have known what was going to happen to Alan, and how can you say you have broken your promise to look after him? Scott you don't love anyone more than you do that kid, and don't worry I've gotten used to the idea." Virgil's voice took a more humours tone as he commented on Scott's overprotective nature.

"It's not just this I should have protected Alan from, it was mom as well." Virgil looked up and waited for clarification as Scott finally turned back around to face his brother as he lent his back onto the windowsill.

"Do you really think Alan would be so hot headed, stubborn and insecure if he and dad had had a better relationship from the start? If we had talked about mom to him and told him what she was like and who she was. The problem is Virg the reason I didn't tell Alan about mom is because I was selfish. I wanted to run from the pain of her death as much as any off us and somehow Alan became the causality of that path."

"Scott you can't blame yourself for that, we all in someway should have made some effort to talk to Alan about mom and about patching things up with dad." Scott shook his head.

"Virgil just listen to Alan's voice and behaviour on that recording. Alan truly believes that dad thinks that little of him; you can here it in how defensive he is when he spoke to Peter. Did you see the look on Alan's face when he was looking at those photos of me and John? Or when Peter said he was living in his bedroom? He was hurting." Scott looked ashamed of not correcting his brother and letting him conjure up the feelings he had expressed in that office.

"Peter was lying and creating stories about dad, some of that never even happened. Alan heard lies that day, nothing else." Virgil tried to correct his brother.

"That's not what's important Virgil; Alan's reaction to that information is what tells me more than anything his feelings about dad."

"He never said Peter was wrong." The voice came from the door and a tousled looking John Tracy.

"Yeah, that's about right." Scott confirmed.

"If Peter had said that stuff to any one of us we would have disagreed with him and told him dad would never say things or do things like that to hurt us. Alan took every word as the truth, and never questioned it once. He believed it himself, so hearing it from Peter never made him question whether his words were true or not." The silence was eerie in the small study and the only movement was made by Gordon to reposition himself into the office from the stairs.

"Peter's plan worked just as well with dad and us as it did with Alan though. Dad believed that Alan would call Rick dad, and that he would sell this family out to the media. Dad is just as fearful that Alan thinks just as badly of him as well." Virgil commented.

"Maybe they have something in common after all." John expressed an idea that he had never considered before as Alan had always been compared to their mother instead.

John Tracy examined the demeanour of his brothers; he was the closest to his father in terms of sharing his details of his life and his feelings with him, in total opposition to Alan. In the past hours since hearing of Peter's actions and intensions the middle Tracy had been feeling a lot of remorse and regret, and it wasn't easing.

"John you okay?" Gordon asked from the chair next to his brother.

"I made this worse." All the boys looked at their fair haired brother in confusion.

"Alan and I have never really been anything near close, and I was mad at him for what I thought he was doing to dad and to this family, and…and I may have expressed that to Peter in some ways." Virgil moved to comfort his brother.

"John you thought he was your friend it's okay, you couldn't have known what he was doing." John however only felt slightly better.

The young astronaut had been crushed by his mother's death when he was young. So the shy, quiet and reclusive boy had then turned to his father in every way and had been inseparable from him ever since. It was Alan that joked that while Scott was his father in progress, John was nevertheless his father's favourite son.

"When I thought that Alan had gone to the press about dad hitting him, I told Alan that we and dad were ashamed of him, and that mom would have been to." Scott Tracy's eyes had been staring aimlessly at the walls before John spoke but now they were firmly fixed on his middle brother.

"What!" It was menacingly spoken.

"John how could you say that? Alan knows nothing of mom and you told him that she would have been ashamed of him!"

"Scott calm down." Virgil shot a look his brother's way, as John looked clearly remorseful of his actions.

"John I'm sorry. It's just that I know because it came from you Alan would have taken that worse than ever." Scott explained as he moved towards his brother running his hands through his hair in frustration.

"How did we all become so separated? Remember when we leaned on each other everyday and worked together whether it was to build snowmen or sweep the leaves." A small smile appeared on Gordon and Virgil's faces as their brother reminisced.

"Team Tracy right? Five brothers looking out for one and another, together we could do anything." Gordon reminded them of their pact from years gone by.

"We still can do that, and were about too." Gordon looked slightly confused but John and Virgil shared an agreed look with the eldest.

"If this has taught me anything then what we're about to embark on is something we need to do as brothers." Scott was now confident on that point and was keen to share that with his father, both Alan and Gordon were needed to carve out their future plans.

Scott threw his arm around Virgil and encouraged John and Gordon up from their seats, Scott Tracy realised one thing at that moment, it was time to move on.

"Gordon we have something to tell you." Scott Tracy smiled and the aquanaut looked bemused.

Jeff Tracy stopped at the traffic lights and glanced over at his son in the passenger seat, he may have made some progress in the last few hours but he knew a lot more needed to be said.

"Alan." The blond glanced up; he had been half wake half sleep for most of the journey to Richard's home and so hadn't noticed they were nearly there.

"Yeah." The blond moved his aching muscles and Jeff reminded himself that he had been flexible to this idea but still was having to resist the urge to tell take him straight home to bed.

As the traffic signal changed Jeff drove the car into a private lane but was surprised to see flashing lights in the distance.

"What's going on?" Alan examined the scene before him as Jeff stopped the car and both men got out. Alan couldn't see the house he had been staying in because large fire trucks and police vehicles were blocking the private drive.

"What's happened? Where's Richard Barton?" Alan questioned to the police before him.

"Yeah that's him, now I remember. That's the guy I was giving a lift too, he gave me his name at the hospital" The voice came from a strong accented New York cab driver, and Alan turned to see the taxi cab next to him.

"I just dropped him off, he went into the house and then I drove away, the next thing I knew there was an explosion behind me." The driver in his early forties explained to the police officers who were taking notes.

"What!" Alan yelled before moving past the men and cars and attempting to go up the drive to the house.

"Alan no!" Jeff moved and stood in front of his son blocking his way just as a large explosion boomed from the house which Alan could now see was already enflamed. The force of the blast was immense and the heat and smoke now was emanating in the men's direction.

"Rick!" Alan again tried to move but Jeff held his son firmly in his arms and attempted to move Alan back down the drive.

"Everyone move it, it's not safe here." The policeman bellowed, as a fire team appeared in the distance running away from the house.

"Alan come on." Jeff forced Alan backwards, while Alan blue eyes were still transfixed on the plumes of smoke and flames that were visible.

"Rick's in there." Alan looked at his father who then looked at the fire chief standing next to him.

"Kid, if anyone was in there during the first blast they would have been killed instantly. My team couldn't even get in as most of building had collapsed before the second blast; the heat was just too much, I'm sorry." Alan looked back towards the cab driver who looked shocked and amazed, before looking at his dad who had a similar look on his face.

"Come on." Jeff virtual carried Alan down the drive before leaving him in front of their car as he went to speak to the police.

Jeff Tracy spoke to the police for around ten minutes but every so often he glanced back towards his son who was leaning against the body of the car looking distant.

"Mr Tracy we will probably need to speak to you and your son again. I don't think it's a great coincidence that this could happen when you, your son and Mr Barton were held hostage less than twelve hours ago." The detective that had been assigned to investigate Peter Hemming's case saw the presence of Jeff Tracy's as soon as he arrived.

"You think Peter Hemmings did this? He's already in police custody." It was a shocked statement by Jeff despite the truth he knew about Peter.

"Now he is, but we are talking about a man who held you hostage and attempted to murder your son. I realise your son and Mr Barton were close, isn't not much of a jump if he wanted to hurt Alan; but we'll investigate all angles. We are having the apartment Hemmings was staying in searched, that should tell us more. The fire investigation team will start work probably tonight as well, if they find anything or…anyone I'll let you know instantly." Jeff nodded, he hadn't really digested the situation nevertheless tied it to Peter.

"Thank you." Jeff moved back towards the car and the distant figure of his son, the air was full of the stench of fire, and smoke still bellowed out of the distant building. If the billionaire thought his son looked ill before it was nothing compare to now.

"Alan." The blond didn't look up as his father and continued to lean on the car bonnet beside him.

"His phone's dead." Jeff saw Alan holding Scott's phone in his hand and questioned what to say from here. Jeff scanned the lawns and gardens that surrounded the property, things now were a lot different compared to the first time he had come here.

"Let me take you home, there's nothing we can do at the moment. The police have my details. They'll call if they find anything." Alan breathed deeply against the toxic air and raised his head but his body struggled to react.

"Woah…Alan." Jeff caught him as Alan lost the balance and stability of his body and his world went black.

"Boys!" Gordon Tracy looked half shell shocked by what he had just heard whilst the other half of his mind considered whether his brothers and father had gone insane. All the boys however were pulled from their thoughts and position around the kitchen table by their father's shout.

"Dad!" Scott arrived first in the hallway to see his father looking fatigued and anxious; Virgil however questioned the black soot and smell of fire that his father had also brought in.

"Give me a hand with your brother will you, he needs to be in bed." All the boys followed their father to see their brother semi conscious in the passenger seat of their car.

"Is he okay?" Virgil pushed past Scott and examined his brother medically while Scott stood next to the car door and waited for an explanation.

"He needs some rest his body he's exhausted from the sedatives and god knows what else. Let's get him to bed." Jeff spoke as the blond came round again and was aided by Virgil to get out of the car.

"I'll put him in my room." Scott spoke as he moved to support the other side of his brother's body.

"John will you call Dr Young, I want Alan examined again now he's home." John nodded and moved to head back towards the house following his three brothers.

"Dad…Dad!" Gordon yelled forcefully to his father from his position near the front of the car as Scott and Virgil moved past him with Alan.

"I err… know you're stressed out dad and I don't want to make things worse but I have one question." Gordon walked away from the house and was looking out towards the private drive that was the entrance to their home.

"What son?" It was an irritated sounding Jeff Tracy that stopped and spoke and questioned what his son was looked at from his position on the drive.

"Why is the bomb squad coming up our drive?" Jeff turned instantly and looked in the same direction. Gordon Tracy often had the ability to shock his brothers with his words but this time all five members paid rapid attention including a semi conscious Alan.

"WHAT!" It came from Scott and Jeff looked terrified when he realising what was happening.

"Boys back away from the house now!" Jeff ran towards Scott, Virgil and Alan.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

Rescued from Resentment and Family First

Jeff Tracy gently circulated the glass before him and the brown liquid moved swiftly with the changing direction, he was deep in thought. The billionaire turned around from his position on the balcony to examine the small hotel room before him, as he moved into the room he placed Scott's cell phone on the small table beside him.

"If you're not going to drink that, I will." Jeff looked up to see his eldest leaving the bedroom, looking just as concerned as he felt.

"It's probably best if neither of us do." Jeff put down the glass next to the phone.

"Is he okay?" Jeff asked Virgil, who also exited the bedroom followed by his two younger brothers.

"He's unconscious, but I think exhaustion has just taken him over now. I'm keeping an eye on him." Virgil explained as he walked over to the small kitchenette to get a drink.

John and Gordon Tracy both sank into the couch while Virgil took the chair, this left the other elder two Tracy's standing. This small hotel room clearly wasn't designed for six men Gordon mused.

"That's good I suppose." John commented on Virgil's diagnosis.

"What did the police have to say?" Scott was eager to know the outcome of the dramatic events from earlier today.

"The house is clear the police searched the place with scanners and dogs, there is no sign of explosives. I rang George and he said he would and make sure the house is secure; we're staying here tonight."

Scott nodded; their gardener had worked for the Tracy family for many years and was very much trusted.

"Dad are you okay?" Jeff Tracy moved to stand in the doorway of the bedroom and examined the sleeping young man briefly before pulling the door closer to him.

Jeff Tracy looked at his sons, the strain and stress of the last days was showing on their faces. They all needed some rest, another reason that they were staying in the local hotel rather than going back to a raided home this evening.

"That was the detective that called; the police examined Peter's office and the apartment he was staying in for the past days. They found diagrams of Richard's house and a list of times over the past month that people have been entering and leaving the house. The police think a bomb was planted near the entrance to the house that was set to go off when someone entered, the gas was also set to leak which cause the larger explosion." Jeff's tone was sombre and his voice quiet.

"What!" John was astounded.

"Shh!" Gordon hissed at him before pointing in the direction of the bedroom.

"Sorry." John's tone was lower while Jeff again looked back into the bedroom at his son through the small gap in the doorway.

"Dad?" Jeff shifted his attention from Alan to continue his debriefing but took a deep breath before he spoke.

"Richard Barton's dead. The police have DNA samples from the blast that are a match to Richard, and they also found his cell phone in the rubble. The CCTV confirmed his entrance to the house, the blast happened thirty seconds later and it engulfed the entrance. He wouldn't have stood a chance of escaping." Jeff looked back at his youngest who was restless in his sleep. Jeff took in the look of shock on his boys faces before knowing he was about to make things worse.

"Peter Hemmings has been charged with Richard Barton's murder." All the boys looked at him stunned by his words.

"I can't believe he's dead?" Gordon questioned the idea based in the disbelief of shock.

"I don't understand, why Barton? Peter didn't even know him." John asked.

"It was for me." Jeff paused before answering and spoke with regret in his voice.

"Dad don't say that, it's not true." Virgil tried to reassure his father and put his hand on his shoulder in comfort.

"It is son. Peter had a document on his computer a list of things he was going to do to help me and therefore make us become closer, one was get revenge for the things Richard had done to this family. The police are taking that as motive." Jeff explained as he moved to sit on the arm of the sofa by John.

The Tracy's sat in silence; knowing what to say was difficult but coming to terms with Peter's action was harder.

"It wasn't just Richard the bomb was for; Alan was probably his target also. The police found a lot of death threats against Alan as well, they think we forced Peter to change his plans when we found out Alan's car was torched and ran off the road. They think holding me and Alan at gun point wasn't planned, and that he saw us enter the building and took advantage of an opportunity." Jeff relayed the information he had just learnt.

"Well that's such a comfort." Scott spoke with hatred and anger.

"So the bomb was designed for the two of them next time they went home?" Jeff shrugged at the question.

"Probably, I guess we'll never really know." Virgil suggested an answer to his brother.

"So what's happening to that bastard?" Scott raised his voice in anger while Gordon hit him softly reminding him of Alan's condition.

"They don't think he his fit enough to be put in court, he's being permanently sectioned, and they think he has had a complete psychotic break. He won't be bothering us or Alan again I guarantee it." The last bit was said with conviction and fury from the billionaire.

"What happens now?" Gordon asked as he rubbed his eyes against tiredness that was setting in.

"Well all need some sleep, there's nothing else to do today." Jeff looked at the clock which read almost six pm; the hours waiting with the police outside the house had been stressful for all of them. Scott's idea for them to stay at the local hotel had been a wise one; as Alan was in desperately need of some rest and was truly agitated by Richard's death.

"Also the police have found the same guy you and Virgil saw at the surveillance company, he has admitted that he was paid to lie to us about who he sold the disk too." Jeff added noting that Scott looked livid at this point, Jeff could see his eldest was thinking that he should have thought about that idea before.

"They also traced a rental car that Peter ordered the other night; they think it's likely to be the same car that ran Alan off the road." Scott paced as he learnt more harrowing information. Silence settled on the room is they all digested the past events with horror, minutes past as they were all engrossed in thought.

"Get ready for bed boys." Jeff Tracy disturbed the silence as he got up from his position on the arm of the chair to walk towards the cold air of the balcony, all his sons watched him with empathy.

"Come on." Virgil encouraged his brother to follow their father's directions and he moved into the kitchen. Scott however continued to look in his father's direction before pulling something out of his pocket and moving to stand beside his father. The view from the small hotel was of the road and some shops across from it, the light was fading fast on the horizon but Scott knew his father would have noticed none of these things.

"Dad, when I picked up Peter's laptop before I found something else hidden in his things. I know its evidence for the police but I just couldn't stand the idea that he had this." Scott passed his father a treasured possession and Jeff looked up and gave his eldest a small smile in gratitude for returning the item.

"Are you going to give it Alan again?" Scott asked as Jeff un-wrapped the item before answering.

"Yes son I am, but this time I want to see him open it." Jeff gave a small smiled at the idea.

Virgil Tracy saw his father and brother on the balcony and smiled before he turned his attention to the actions of his brothers who were creeping around in the darkened bedroom. It touched his heart how Gordon and John were surrounding their youngest brother and every so often either tucking Alan in or stroking his hair.

"What are you two doing?" It was said in a loving manner as Virgil sat on the end of the large bed looking at both a sleeping Alan and his brothers sitting either side of him.

"We just wanted to check he was okay?" Gordon replied quietly.

"You're not the only one who likes to play big brother you know." John added playfully but Gordon hissed at him to be quieter as Alan stirred.

"Gordon, Alan's exhausted and I gave him a pretty powerful sedative, he's going to take some waking." Virgil explained, but Gordon looked no less anxious about Alan being disturbed.

"Shouldn't you two be in bed?" Virgil added and the two younger Tracy's shared a look.

"Are you joining in the big brother game?" John asked, but knew Virgil's question was just a natural worry of concern about him and Gordon.

"It's hard not too; but you just remember I also get this big brother overprotection attitude from Scott." Gordon shook his head at Virgil's excuse.

"We all get it from Scott, especially Alan. At least you have only one big brother above you; be grateful." Gordon replied as he once again moved the blankets to get his brother cosy and comfortable.

"Oh I think Scott has a special place for Alan in his over powering, overprotecting brotherly way." Virgil looked at his sleeping brother as he spoke those words, but when he looked back up at his conscious brothers he questioned the look on their faces.

"What?" John and Gordon smirked and glanced at each other.

"You're in trouble!" Gordon added with a larger smile and Virgil turned around to see his elder brother looking disapprovingly down at him from the doorway.

"My over powering, over protecting brotherly way? Here was I about to yell at those two for not following dad's orders and going to bed, but now you have reminded me of my duties as the eldest, I think you can do the same as well Virgil." Scott added with a good humoured but dominant smug look.

"Bed, now!"

"Scott." The pilot heard the protest of all three of his brothers but one look stopped all the questioning.

"No, you need some rest, okay no arguments." Scott's voice was more firm.

"Night Alan." Gordon brushed his hand over the blonds hair, while John gave him one last concerned look before they both then moved past Scott and on to the other empty double bed.

"Well this is going to be cosy." John commented as he started to remove his jumper and jeans on the far side of the bed.

"Whoa Johnny boy, stop there! I'm not sleeping in the same bed as you if you're butt naked." Gordon commented at John's actions and Scott and Virgil shared a smirk from where they stood behind the swimmer on the opposite side of the bed from John.

"Funny Gordon." John added as the blond removed his socks.

"Actually I was thinking I should have this bed to myself, you know as a younger brother's privilege and you lot can sleep on the floor, night then!" Gordon smiled and laughed as he jumped in to the middle of the large bed and quickly spread his body out to fill as much space as possible. John shared a look with his older brother that spoke volumes for the likelihood of that happening.

"That's funny Gordon, but no chance." John smirked at Gordon before he got on the bed and moved under the covers next to his brother.

Virgil and Scott only stood over the bed and watched the two brothers fight for the blankets and push each other for more bed space. After a few minutes of watching the middle Tracy brothers playful quarrel Scott looked at Virgil inquisitively.

"What?" Virgil asked as Scott continued to look at him in an expectant manner.

"I wasn't joking Virgil, after that comment you can also be put to bed like my little brother." Scott sounded determined and moved to gentle direct Virgil closer towards the bed.

"But…" Virgil moaned as Gordon and John sniggered as they enjoyed their older brother's reaction to Scott's over protectiveness.

"You want me to undress you Virgy?" Gordon asked while Scott smiled at his brother's baby name, but Virgil didn't.

"Alright!" Virgil stopped complaining but all three of his brother hissed at him for the volume of his voice, and Virgil only rolled his eyes confident that an earthquake at this point wouldn't even wake Alan.

"Move up you two… and stop laughing." Virgil removed his own clothing and got in the bed to lie next to Gordon.

"Nice boxers Virg!" Gordon smirked again and Virgil sent him a warning glance Gordon responded in mock surrender as he raised his hands.

"Okay, I'm sleeping, I'm sleeping." Gordon wriggled to make himself more comfortable, while Virgil gently brushed his brothers stray hairs back from his face and watched both his brothers settle into sleep.

"Virg, neither of us are going to be able to sleep with you staring at us all night." John commented on his brother's actions despite his eyes being shut.

"How do you know I'm looking at you, your eyes are shut." John opened one of his eyes and smiled.

"I know because if you weren't here to watch over Gordon I would be watching him fall sleep instead." Virgil shared a smile with Scott who was now sat on the end of the bed by Virgil's feet.

"Night little brothers." Scott spoke in a caring manner.

"Oh and Virg, I'll be doing the little brother watching tonight, so go to sleep." Scott and Virgil shared one last glance before Virgil quickly settled.

Scott Tracy sat for a few minutes looking between each of the beds but as he heard gentle snores from the overly occupied bed the eldest Tracy moved to examine his baby brother once more.

Scott Tracy slid his body around Alan's sleeping form but sat up enough so his upper body was hunched over the blond. He had watched Alan sleep since the day he had been born. The same day he had said goodbye to his mother was the same day he kissed the forehead of the tiny and critically ill form of Alan Tracy. Nearly nineteen years later Scott repeated that action but was concerned by the temperature and restlessness of his brother.

"Nice speech." Jeff Tracy stood at the doorway to the bedroom and watched Scott with his youngest son.

"You heard that?" Jeff nodded and examined his three sleeping sons hunched together in the bed.

"Well I think Virgil was getting a bit big for his boots, I was just reminding him that I am his big brother too." Scott spoke in an even softer tone due to his close position to Alan.

Jeff moved into the room further and glanced at his elder son before moving to sit on the opposite side of Alan to Scott.

"I don't think you have ever let Virgil forget that he is younger than you Scott." Jeff had a small smile on his face, he had overheard ever word of the interactions between his sons and had truly enjoyed sitting and listening to the gifts Lucy had given him from the next room.

Scott also smiled before again stroking Alan's hair that sat on his heated forehead.

"He's a bit warm." Scott informed his father and Jeff nodded in return.

"That might be because the four of you have wrapped him up like he is about to enter the arctic." Jeff suggested and just in support of his father's point Alan moved to loosen his sheets.

"Oh, yeah you may have a point. That protective streak strikes again." Jeff nodded as he looked at his eldest with utter admiration.

"Scott." The pilot looked up at his father.

"I don't say this anywhere near enough but…thank you." Scott was concerned by the emotion that emanated from his father's voice.

"Are you okay dad?" Scott asked and Jeff nodded in reply.

"When your mom died I just couldn't cope. Scott I just don't have any idea how the hell you did, you had three little brothers and a baby to look after but you just carried on as usual. I'm so proud of you Scott Tracy. I'm proud you're a pilot, I'm proud you're my son and I'm so proud that you care so much for your brothers. I love you more than I can ever say, and I'm sorry if I ever made you question that." Scott saw the meaning and love in those words but was surprised that his father was speaking them.

"Thanks dad…but I have never ever questioned whether you love me or any of us, including Alan." Jeff appreciated his son's honesty.

"Alan thinks I don't love him." Jeff sounded so deflated when he confessed that to his eldest.

"Deep down he knows you do, and in time you can show him." Scott empathised with his father and then turned his attention to an again restless Alan.

"Shh, calm down kiddo." Scott spoke softly and wrapped his arm around Alan again.

"You've been doing that since the day he was born." Jeff pointed out as Alan settled.

"Yeah well I enjoy it, I remember mom doing it to us all, even you when you were ill. So somehow calming him down while he sleeps is my way of showing Alan what mom would have been like with him." Scott explained, hoping that he wouldn't upset his father too much by his explanation.

"She would have worshipped him." Jeff said sadly.

"Scott I'm so grateful for what you have done for Alan over the years but at the same time I feel so guilty for not doing it myself. Things need to change for this kid; I need to change for him. I have let you fill in as my role in Alan's life for too long." Jeff confessed before standing in a determined manner. Scott watched with curiosity as his father walked around the bed to stand next to him, and responded to his father's idea.

"Alan's never been a burden to me, but that's great that you want to be more of a part of his life…" Scott smiled at that idea but looked confused by his father's behaviour of just standing above him.

"What are you doing?" Scott asked as he turned his head to look up at his father.

"Get up Scott." Jeff gestured for him to stand but Scott only looked unsure.

"Why?" Scott still looked bemused.

"I'm over ruling you. You maybe chief big brother for them but I out rank you, so move to the other side of the bed and go to sleep." Scott looked amused by his father's words.

"Nice dad, I see what Virgil had to deal with now but this is different, I need to check on Alan." Scott turned his attention back to his brother but his father lightly took hold of his arm in response.

"Up." Scott had a protested look on his face but moved to a sitting position nevertheless.

"Scott you need some sleep, so go to bed." Jeff indicated to the other side of the bed again this time in a slightly stronger tone.

"I know but Alan needs me…" Scott pointed to his sleeping brother but his father calmly interrupted him.

"Scott don't take this the wrong way but for the past nineteen years Alan has come to you and instead of me. You're his brother Scott not his dad, and while your there in that position I can't be." Scott considered his father's words and realised he had never really considered how much he unconsciously treated Alan like his own son. Or how his position had obstructed his father's and Alan's relationship.

"It's about time I learnt to watch over this one myself and hope that one day Alan will need me as much as he needs you. So move kid, you're in my seat!" Jeff smiled at the last part as Scott finally did as he was told and moved around the other side of the bed.

Jeff Tracy took up the same position that Scott had previously occupied as the pilot changed out of his clothes and got in bed next to Alan.

"Night dad." Scott glanced over at the other bed before turning on to his side placing his back to Alan and his father.

"You're not going to watch him sleep?" Jeff asked as he brushed his hand down Alan's cheek before looking in Scott's direction.

"No, that's your job dad." Scott smiled as he shut his eyes.

Jeff Tracy smiled at his sons understanding. The billionaire settled down by the side of his son with his arm wrapped around his youngest, for that moment at least he enjoyed the silence and peace that he had with Alan.

"Dad…Dad." Scott Tracy hated doing this but he knew his father would want to know an update on their situation. He watched his father awaken and question the situation he was in, but one look at the still sleeping form of his youngest beside him reminded him of everything.

"Scott…For a moment then I thought that this had all been a dream." Jeff removed the covers from over his body and stood up next to his eldest.

"I didn't really want to wake you but the police have been on the phone, as has Penny." Jeff nodded and stretched his body to relieve to discomfort of sleeping upright.

"It was the best decision son." Jeff turned to face his sleeping son and made him comfortable as Scott watched.

"We are all in the kitchen, if you can call it that. Virgil's made you a coffee." Jeff gave Alan one last look before moving towards the bathroom.

"That's just what I need, he's a good lad. I'll see you in there in a minute." Scott nodded as his father moved past him. Scott Tracy examined his little brother as he moved to sit on the bed, Alan's temperature had dropped which pleased the pilot and Alan seemed to be sleeping peacefully.

"So are you." Scott whispered to Alan before grazing his brothers blond locks with his hand and then getting up and moving towards the bedroom door.

"Scott you have to eat something." Virgil protested at Scott breakfast choice of a strong cup of coffee, despite the kitchen sideboards being covered with breakfast food.

"Leave him Virg that means there's more for us." Gordon Tracy heaped food onto his plate despite his brother's rolling their eyes at the mountain of food he was planning to eat.

"What? I'm hungry, and you two can talk you usually have a hollow leg as well." Gordon pointed at both Scott and Virgil; actually the two blonds of the family were the only small eaters Gordon realised.

"Let him have his breakfast." Jeff commented as he entered the room.

"But all of you should be eating, not just Gordon eating for all of you." Jeff gave his two cents on his son's behaviour.

Virgil passed his father a steaming cup of coffee and Jeff smiled his appreciation.

"Thanks dad." Gordon spoke with his mouth full and John nudged him for his bad manners, but Gordon only looked at him with confusion.

"Leave him John." Jeff moved to sit by Virgil on the sofa.

"What did the police say?" Jeff got down to business, but saw Scott pause before speaking.

"The police found explosive devices and a plan of Barton's house in Peter's things; but apparently Peter isn't going to be in court anytime soon, the police think he's too disturbed." Jeff nodded as he took in the information.

"Wow, whatever gave them that idea?" Gordon asked but no one laughed.

"He has confessed to the attempts on Alan's life, but seems too confused and disturbed to be subjected to more questioning." Scott reported what he had been told by the police.

"Penny?" Jeff asked.

"Oh she wanted to talk to you when you were awake that's all." Jeff smiled at the thought of his friends concern.

"I'll call her in a minute." Jeff replied.

"The house is clear and the police have left, but apparently it's a right mess." Scott saw that his brothers looked saddened by this idea of their childhood home being ransacked.

"It can all be put back, Alan's safe that's what's important." Virgil added an optimistic take on the situation and Jeff put his hand on his shoulder to thank him for reminding them of that.

"I take it were going home then?" Gordon asked while he ripped up a pancake.

"Yes, but not where you think. Boys I think it's time we moved forward, we're going to go stay on the island for a few days, all of us." Scott nodded at the idea.

"Yeah that's a great idea dad, because the media will be swarming around this for a while." John spoke while he picked up the daily paper and showed his father the headline.

"That's the last thing we need, make sure Alan doesn't see that." Jeff took the paper from his son and glanced through the text.

"I'll ring Steven and put out a formal statement from Tracy Enterprise." Jeff dropped the paper down on to the small coffee table and walked to pick up the phone.

"Dad…Are you selling the house?" John asked quietly and Jeff stopped what he was doing and walked back towards his sons.

"If you don't want me too; then no." Jeff knew this question would arise at some point, and had been avoiding it for a while.

"Dad I know we lived there with mom and everything but…it's only a house if were all going to live together on the island than that's going to be are home." All were amazed that this idea came from John's mouth; he was expected to be the one who would cling to the past the most.

"Boys we need to talk about this some more, I don't want to force you all to make a decision you might regret." Jeff's voice was soft and considerate but he realised then how much his children had grown into young men.

"We'll go and get some clothes from the house and meet you at the airport if you want?" John suggested.

"Sounds good son, make sure you get Alan some of his clothes too." Virgil caught his father's eye.

"Will he be okay to fly?" Jeff asked his medically trained son.

"Yeah he should be fine, minus a migraine or two maybe." Virgil moved the empty cups back into the kitchen.

"Are you going to talk to him?" Scott asked and Jeff looked at him with apprehension of the idea.

"I'll have a go, but I think he's going to be quite upset." Jeff shared his expectations of Alan's demeanour.

"He's going to think that this is his fault you know." Gordon confessed his fear but his Jeff had already considered this idea.

"I know, but it's not…actually I think it's mine." Jeff sounded sombre and deflated.

"Dad you can't be serious?" John protested.

"John I let Peter into our lives and he hurt and nearly killed my son. What's worse is despite my feeling for him, Richard Barton is dead because of someone I employed, I let live with me, and I let have this opportunity. I have to take some responsibility for this." The Tracy sons showed a look of total disagreement on their faces, but the phone rang before anyone could argue back.

"Jeff Tracy." Jeff moved over towards the balcony leaving his sons to think back on the actions of the past months.

"He's wrong." Scott spoke with confidence.

"We know that and if dad looks at it factually, so does he." Virgil added.

"Then why does he blame himself?" Gordon quizzed as he watched his father on Scott's cell phone.

"He thinks Alan's about to blame him for Richard's death. God I hope they listen to each other and this doesn't turn into an all out war." Scott even hated the idea that that could happen.

"Well I think were about to find out soon enough, lets give them some time alone. Get ready to go and I'll get dad's car keys." Scott moved from his position to collect his jacket.

"Everything okay?" Jeff turned to Scott's direction.

"Yeah, just Steven he's dealing with the media. Alan's name is being slightly protected due to the nature of the case." Jeff informed his son as he watched his other sons in the background put on their shoes and jackets.

"We'll get out of your way, call Virgil's cell when you leave and we will meet you at the jet." Scott moved closer and embraced his father with a strong hug.

"Thanks son, for everything." Jeff enjoyed holding his eldest for an instant longer before moving into the room to say goodbye to his other sons.

"Come here you two." Gordon and John both shared a hug with their father, both noticing Jeff held on to them a little tighter and a little longer than usual.

"Will you be okay with him?" Virgil asked as he moved closer to his father's position.

"Yeah, thanks son." Virgil wrapped his arms around his father, his father wasn't really an affectionate man but the artist felt that was about to change slightly.

"Be careful, all of you." Jeff added as the four men moved towards the hotel room door, all smirking at their fathers sudden over protectiveness.

"Dad please! Scott's here you don't need to worry, he'll probably make us hold hands when we cross the street." Gordon replied and all accept Scott laughed.

"Bye." After a chorus of goodbye's Jeff was left in silence, he quickly peered his head into the bedroom to check on his still sleeping son before looking at the clock.

It would be afternoon in London, so Jeff didn't hesitate to call Penny.

Jeff Tracy heard Penelope's sweet calming accent and so relaxed slightly, it reminded him of his wife and Lucy's soothing voice.

"Penny its Jeff, thanks for calling before." Lady Penelope seemed worried by the tired sounding voice of Jeff Tracy.

"It's no problem Jeff, anything to help. I'm so sorry about this situation, it's terrible." Penny confessed her regret to the billionaire she knew very well.

"Thanks Penny, and I'm sorry about Richard I know he was a friend of yours." The blond beauty accepted the concern and sympathy.

"Well that's why I called. I have found no evidence that the police or anyone else knows about your new business. I know about all the evidence the police have and it's all concerning Alan's attack and Richards's death, nothing more. I have got someone giving me updated details on Peter Hemmings condition and actions." Jeff took in the information and was glad that he had given Penny a high level position in his future plans.

"Thanks Penny, that's some good news and at the minute I need all the good news I can get." Jeff watched his children leave the hotel below him, and smiled and let out a small laugh when Scott grabbed Gordon's hand and forced him to hold it as they crossed the street.

"Jeff?" Penny asked about the small laugh she heard.

"Sorry Penny. I'm just watching my boys…being my boys." Jeff watched as all the boys' bar Gordon found Scott's actions hilarious as they got into the car.

"Well that's nice to hear at least." Penny paused before continuing she didn't know if the next news she had was good or bad.

"About what you called me for yesterday, I managed to confirm Richard's story. He and Lucy did have a child together and his name was Mathew Barton. He died the same day he was born; it was a few months before you began dating Lucy… I never knew about this Jeff." Penny explained the new information that she had discovered.

"Thank you Penny, I just wanted to make sure it was the truth." Jeff seemed no more comfortable with this information now than before, as it meant Lucy had hidden this from him.

"Are you going to tell the boys?" Jeff was surprised not by the question but that the idea had never come to him before now.

"I suppose I should, I don't know what's really best." Jeff confessed.

"The truth usually, otherwise it only causes more harm later." Jeff smiled; this was why he enjoyed a friendship with Penny.

"I'll call you soon Jeff. All my best to the boys, especially Alan." Penny spoke warmly as she said her goodbye's to her companion.

Jeff Tracy stood and watched the early morning world go by for a few minutes after he ended his call to Penny, but was broken from his thoughts by the sound of his son being violently sick.

"Alan!" Jeff dropped Scott's phone on the chair before swiftly entering the bedroom only to see the bed empty and Alan leaving the bathroom.

"Alan." Jeff quickly wrapped his arms around each side the blond's torso and took his weight, as the young mans head was draped forward and he was looking unstable.

"Alan, are you okay?" Jeff became extremely concerned as Alan lent all of his weight on to his father and didn't respond.

"Come on back in bed." Jeff directed his son to the bed as he saw Alan's vision swim as disorientation take over.

"That's it lay down." Alan complied if only to stop the room from spinning as he became more conscious to his surroundings.

"I'm calling a doctor." Jeff felt his sons head with concern.

"No, I'm fine… just a headache." Jeff resisted acting on his instincts but only just.

"Are you sure? God knows what's in your system." Alan nodded at his father but wished he hadn't and he shut his eyes firmly as another wave of nausea hit him again.

"It's alright, shhh…. just relax." Jeff moved to the bathroom to get a cloth to cool down Alan's raging temperature, before sitting beside him on the bed.

As his youngest drifted in and out of consciousness the billionaire looked at him and considered the conversation he was going to haft to have with Alan. Jeff was only interrupted from his thoughts when he saw Alan's blue eyes become more focused and alert.

Alan had woken abruptly to the feeling of utter sickness and whilst he was in the bathroom he had vomited violently. After his father had helped him back to bed he had lay in the bed until the nights events came back to him. He was also surprised to have his father sitting beside him acting so lovingly.

"Where am I?" Alan coughed hard, and tasted the fire from yesterday.

"In a hotel room, don't worry about anything okay. You're going to be fine given a bit of time." Jeff smiled down on Alan and spoke soothingly.

"Rick?" Alan asked with a slight hope in his eyes, and Jeff Tracy considered that this was the fourth time he had told his son that someone he cared about was dead.

"Alan he…." The blond need to hear no more, all hope he had had that Rick could've made it out of the house vanished as Alan saw his father's eyes. He shut his eyes again and digested this information; he felt such sorrow and guilt.

"What are you doing?" Jeff asked as he gently put his arm on the front of Alan's chest to holt his sons movement.

"Getting up." Alan pointed out.

"You need to rest Alan; your body has been through so much." To prove that idea Alan rubbed his bruised wrist from the tightness of the restraints he had been bound in. However Alan wasn't sure he could just sit there, and he wasn't used to having his father so close to him when he was upset; he was desperate to be alone.

"I can't just lye here." Alan protested and sat up.

"Alan I'm sorry about Richard." Jeff had meant it, but Alan wasn't so sure.

"I'm surprised your even here, shouldn't you be throwing a party to celebrate that Rick's dead; he's quite clearly out of my life so you got what you wanted." Jeff sighed.

"Alan that's not fair. I would never have wished that on him or anyone, especially because this has hurt you, but I'm so glad that you're okay." Jeff spoke with no anger or resentment and wrapped his arm around Alan's shoulder to confirm his last words.

"Come here." Jeff leaned over his son moved to embrace him with a strong hug, Alan didn't return the gesture but neither did he stop his father's actions.

"How about you come with me and your brothers for a bit of a break, just the six of us, we can spend some time together while you get better." Jeff decided it was wiser to suggest this idea than demand Alan did as he said.

"I promise no yelling or fighting, I just need you beside me so I can see that you're okay." Jeff could see the exhaustion and ill health that Alan was fighting.

"The media are going to be everywhere if you stay here?" Jeff was determined Alan was going with them.

"Do I get a choice, or have you already decided?" Alan read between his father's words, right now he just wanted to get the hell away from everything that reminded him of Richard and the last few days.

"I think you need to get away from this circus that's going to develop. Alan you need to rest and I guarantee no one with bother us where were going." Jeff smiled; Alan looked like he felt too unwell to argue back.

"Fine, but no lectures." Alan added and Jeff nodded in agreement.

"Good, come on lets get you to the airport you can sleep again on the jet." Jeff moved to find Alan's shoes but stopped instantly when Alan gave him a strange look.

"Airport, where are we going?" Jeff had forgotten that Alan didn't know about the project or anything else yet, he smiled back at this idea.

"Paradise."

Alan Tracy opened his eyes to see another unknown location but as soon as he moved his brother who was sat next to him noticed his presence.

"Morning sleepy head, err I think its morning anyway. All these mixing days and nights it's getting to me, never mind the jet lag." Alan looked at him with confusion until he remembered boarding his father private jet the last time he was awake.

"You were even asleep before we even left the airport, never mind the ten hour flight here; we have just arrived by the way." Alan saw his father and brothers move into the back part of the jet as he sat up.

"How you feeling kiddo?" Scott asked and Alan just rubbed his head and squinted again at the light in response.

"I think we should get you upstairs, Virgil will you help him." Jeff asked before he instructed his boys to follow him.

Alan left the jet but only due to the supporting hands of Gordon and Virgil. The blond stood on the tarmac and looked up with ore at the large glass and metal structure and the island greenery surrounding it.

Alan shot his brothers a look of amazement and Virgil smiled in response.

"That's what you get when you miss staff meetings kiddo." Scott smiled as well as he led his brothers up to the main house and the central lounge area.

"Welcome home boys." Jeff put down some of the luggage and examined the clock on the wall, it read nine am.

"I think we should all get some more sleep before anything else, you especially." He pointed to Alan who was now walking less aided by his brothers.

"Where are we?" Alan asked as he took in the large room with a grand piano and long sofas, the light was just penetrating the room from the sun rise.

"A desert island in the south Pacific." Scott pulled back the draped netting to reveal the view of the pools, tennis courts and patios followed by the airstrip and ocean in the distance.

"I bet Greenpeace will give you hell for this." Alan spoke as he walked out on to the balcony.

"Maybe, or maybe not." Jeff shook his head and eyed his other sons with a smile; Alan would be told later about the purpose of this island, for now they needed to focus on other things.

"Lets show you your room shall we." Jeff walked down one of the corridors leading off the main room and all his sons followed.

"Hold on, if I got the darkest room so I can star gaze and Gordon got the closest bedroom to the pools. Which did you two get?" John asked his eldest brothers as they made up the tail end as they followed their father and their younger brothers.

"I got the quietest room next to dad's and far away from those two's rooms." Gordon turned at that comment as Scott pointed towards him and Alan.

"Yeah right, it's more like you two got the rooms with the most amount of sound proofing to stop the whole world hearing you both snore." Gordon suggested as he stopped outside his own bedroom.

"I'm going to take a shower and get some sleep, although my body doesn't know if its day or night?" Gordon pondered as he dropped his luggage on his bedroom floor.

"Just ask your stomach, that's usually what works for you." Scott yelled with a smirk as Gordon shut his door in Scott's face as a reply.

Alan stopped to watch Gordon enter his room and the interaction with his eldest brother, therefore missing his father discrete direction his other brothers to leave.

"Come on you John, I'll show you your room." Scott took hold of the blond's shoulders and directed him into the room across the hall from Gordon's; Virgil smiled at Alan before following his brother inside the room.

"You coming son?" Alan turned back to see his father opening the last room on the white corridor.

"Yeah, but I'm kind of worried what view I got." Alan entered the large room which currently only contained a dresser, double bed and a plasma TV. Alan watched as his father walked straight up to the full height glass doors and open them.

"Oh don't worry I saved the best view on the entire island for you." Jeff pulled back the white cloth and Alan walked out on to the balcony, the most stunning view lay before him. To the left of him lay the far edge of the island where Blue Ocean met white sand for miles and miles and continued for as far as Alan could see to his right. In front of his eyes Alan saw nothing but ocean with the sun rising perfectly from it. Alan looked at his father who joined him at the edge of the large balcony; this was paradise.

"I'm glad you like it." Jeff took in Alan's reaction with a smile. Alan may have enjoyed the speed of an F1 car but since he was young he had always had the ability to just sit in silence for hours and take in a view. Both men stood for a while in silence before Alan decided he needed a shower.

Alan Tracy let the burning hot water wash over his head and chest, his muscles ached and his head pounded, but that was nothing compared to the sadness he felt. He wondered why he had gone alone with his fathers request for him to come here; part of reason he decided was because he had promised Richard he would listen to his father. Alan was struggling to understand and accept the past day's events; Richard was dead and he just couldn't stop thinking that it was supposed to have been him that was dead instead.

Alan stepped out of the shower and looked at himself in the mirror; the last words Richard had said to him ran around his head. He pulled on his sweat pants and towelled down his hair, but as he walked back into his bedroom the change in temperatures made him felt disorientated again.

"Alan." Scott knocked and waited before entering his brother's room, hearing Alan was still in the shower he walked out on to his brother's balcony.

He had been previously having a drink and a talk with his father in the kitchen and had volunteered to check on his brother and try and encourage him back to bed. The pilot turned around as he heard his brother exit the bathroom and moved quickly towards him when he saw his brother sway unsteadily.

"Easy kiddo, it's definitely bedtime for you." Scott took all Alan's weight and directed his brother to his bed.

"I'm just a bit dizzy." Alan confessed but that didn't stop his brother's actions.

"Yeah I know but sleep will help." Scott sat Alan down before reaching in to the suitcase at the foot of the bed to pull out a t-shirt.

"Put this on." Scott helped his brother pull the t-shirt over his head before pulling back the sheets and encouraging Alan to lay back.

Alan did as suggested before looking up at his brother who was sitting on the bed facing towards him; Scott looked like he had a lot on his mind and the younger man soon found out what that was after a few minutes of silence settled between them.

"Are you talking to me?" Scott sounded worried about the answer.

"I suppose." Alan tried not to meet his brother's eyes, Scott had really hurt him.

"I'm sorry. Please Alan I hate it when you're mad at me. Somehow I just can't stop thinking about how I would have felt Peter would have..." Scott didn't continue, and he didn't have too. As the pilot confessed his worries he ran his hand over Alan's head to confirm the meaning in his words. Alan caved slightly in his anger and annoyance, it wasn't often he saw his brother look so sad or so sorry.

"If you ever thought that I had ever abandoned you Alan, then I'm so sorry. I should have believed you, I was just so worried that you were taking drugs and that you would be hurt." The dark haired pilot felt shameful and looked into his brother's blue eyes for any sign of forgiveness. Alan looked back at his brother with guilt; he didn't mean to make Scott feel so bad. Days ago he would have never forgiven Scott for his actions and would never have heard him out like this, but a lot can change in twenty four hours.

Alan rubbed his temples against the pain of his headache before leaning his head back against the pillows, he sighed deeply before speaking.

"I didn't mean it when I said that I was disappointed in you. I know we all make mistakes Scott but some how I never think that you do. I just never thought you wouldn't believe me." Alan spoke with wisdom and honesty that many wouldn't have expected from him and his brother looked truly touched by his words.

"Everything is such a mess; I just can't believe what has been going on?" Scott Tracy considered the deep sadness the echoed in the eyes of his brother, but in an instant Alan's composure was back and the emotions hidden again.

"Are you okay Alan?" Scott questioned, he wished to god his baby brother would open up to someone, anyone. The pilot moved closer to his brother and wrapped his arm around him. The memories of Alan struggling to deal with the deaths of Rachel and her parents returned to him. However he was snapped from his memories by Alan's embrace of him, he returned the loving gesture but was concerned by Alan's uncharacterised actions.

Scott pulled his brother away from him after a few seconds to understand the meaning behind the embrace but saw such confusion on the face of his brother.

"Alan you can talk to me you know? Don't keep this all locked up, please." Alan saw the pleading emotions on his brother's face, he did feel upset but guilt and regret dominated his emotions.

"That explosion was meant for me wasn't it, not Rick?" Scott Tracy had no words of comfort for his baby brother.. Scott only moved to lie beside his brother before pulling Alan closer towards his chest and wrapping his arm around Alan's shoulders.

"I'm sorry Alan." Scott whispered in a desperate need to comfort the blond, part of him begging Alan would crack. Scott knew Alan had no ability to deal with his own feelings. While Virgil would feed his emotions into music or art, and Gordon would swim them out until exhaustion, Alan somehow learnt to hide any feelings he had.

Scott Tracy lay there holding his brother for an unknown amount of time broken only from his thoughts by Alan's gentle snoring; due to shear exhaustion only Alan had fell asleep.

Jeff Tracy continued to watch from the doorway of the bedroom as his eldest wished his youngest pleasant dreams. He had been glad his eldest and youngest were now on better terms but he had also seen Alan's state of mind and that was bothering the billionaire.

John Tracy made his way back from the small observatory that his father had especially built for him and walked on to the open patio next to it. John had had an early dinner with his family, minus Alan, a couple of hours ago and had decided at dusk to come and examine some of his work.

John had noticed both Scott and his father hadn't eaten much of their meal, and had soon left afterwards to talk in the lounge. John had tried to relax by stargazing but his mind was still fixed on the last few days' events, so had come out to get some air.

"Alan?" The younger blond turned his head to look in the direction that the voice had come from only to see John looking bemused as his presence as he walked down the steps from the observatory.

"Hey… I needed some air; you don't mind me invading your space do you?" John noticed Alan looked concerned that he was interrupting him.

"No, of course not, I just thought you were still asleep that's why I was surprised to see you here." John explained as he walked on to the patio and took a seat on the outdoor couches.

"I wasn't disturbing you was I?" Alan asked as he looked up to the stars above him.

"No of course not, I was just checking my results from the study of the…" John paused and Alan looked at him because of it.

"You were asking out of politeness weren't you? You know Scott does the same thing but then he gives me this look of complete confusion, like I had been speaking Latin or something." Alan gave a small smile indicating his corresponding behaviour to Scott's, and John laughed in return.

"Careful you're turning in to a mini Scott." Alan again looked back up to the quickly darkening sky and the scattered stars that were emerging.

"Don't say that." Alan spoke as he examined the stars, night had set in fast and air was getting cooler. A silence set between the blonds before John confessed his emotions.

"Alan…I'm sorry." Alan looked back over towards where his brother was lying on the sofa, the night lights and low lighting cast his brother in deep shadow.

"About?" Alan asked softly but half knowing the answer.

"Alan I was his friend and the whole time he was plotting to kill you, I feel terrible." John confessed in a soft and emotional tone.

"John you didn't know, don't worry about it." Alan tried to ease his brother's guilt, the last thing he needed was to know he was making his brother's feel so guilty.

"But you were so angry at us only two days ago?" John relived the arguments that they had all had with Alan, and due to that he questioned the sincerity of his brother's acceptance of his apology.

"I know, but two days ago I didn't know what was going on myself. I wish I had, and then Rick would still be here." Alan didn't meet John's eyes as he looked around the small patio stationed on the highest part of the island away from the house.

As John Tracy looked at his brother he couldn't help but think of his mother, they were so alike.

"I'm so sorry that I said that mom would have been ashamed of you. It's not true, and I only said it because I was jealous of you." John spoke from the heart and his little brother sat upright at his words.

"What?" Alan got up and moved to sit on the edge of the couch John was laid on; he was truly puzzled by what John meant.

"I wish sometimes I could be more like you Alan, because you're so much like mom. I was jealous that you're like her and I'm not, but then I reminded myself that I would never swop being like mom for never knowing mom." Alan lowered his head, he could count how many times he and John had spoken about their mother on one hand.

However Alan felt keen to return the gesture of emotion and gratitude that John showed.

"Actually if I ever think what mom would have been like somehow I think of a cross between you and Virgil." John raised his head to look at Alan and smiled lovingly at his brother.

"Really?" Alan nodded and John seemed touched by Alan's rare confession concerning his mother.

"Anyway being John Tracy can't be that bad, being dad's favourite son has to have some advantages right?" Alan smiled as did John.

"We just get on well that's all, I'm not his favourite!" Alan only shook his head in protest before looking at John. Despite seeing his brother so little in the past years, Alan was touched about how caring John had been towards him in the past hours. John had an honest and caring nature, but was deeply emotional about matters close to his heart. Alan considered this was probably the real reasons why he had avoided being close to his middle brother.

"I have jealous of you for years John." John Tracy was surprised by Alan's openness about their mother, but that sentence had shocked him completely. Alan took in John's amazement but continued to explain his words.

"You can get on with dad and never argue but I can't manage a five minute conversation without it ending in disaster." Alan sounded slightly disheartened by that idea John noted.

"He trusts you completely, you always do the right thing in his eyes and he never looks at you with disappointment…and you're his favourite." John rolled his eyes at the last bit, but he took a real interest in the meaning behind Alan's words.

"Alan you might have to except dad sees you slightly differently that he sees us, despite what you might think he is extra protective about you. He hates that he has hurt you by pushing you away, and he just can't stand the idea that he could ever lose the one piece of mom that is still with us. Part of him can't face you without seeing mom, and the other part is so desperate never to make sure he never loses you like he lost mom." John tried to put his take on his father's and Alan's unique and varying relationship.

"Yeah there's kind of a lot of water under that bridge, but when I heard him talk to me at the hospital it was like he was seeing me completely differently. I never thought he would ever say some of the things he said." Alan had been thinking about his conversation with his father since he woken up.

"We all need to let go of mom Alan, especially dad." John added thoughtfully, as blue eyes met blue eyes and silence settled between them again.

"I think I will walk back." Alan added as a chill passed over his skin.

"Okay, I think I'll stay for a bit yet. Will you be okay getting back?" John asked concerned before Alan rolled his eyes in reply.

"Okay, forget I said anything." John watched his baby brother get up and walk away.

"Alan." Alan turned back at John's call.

"Alan if you're waiting for mine or dad's forgiveness before you start having a better relationship with us then you are going to be waiting a long time because it will never happen. You have nothing to apologise of feel guilty about in relation to mom." Alan was taken back by John's truthful revelation and he saw emotion all over his brother's face.

"Thanks." Alan walked away as he processed that idea; it made him feel just slightly better.

"Dad he's too young!" Jeff sighed and sat back into the deep leather chair, he looked over at Scott who was sitting on one of the chairs on the other side of his desk. He had just explained to Scott that he was going to offer his youngest son a place in their new rescue business if he wanted too.

"Never mind he's inexperienced or not trained in anything that going to help us dad. I was worried that Gordon was would still be too young to do this when we begin in fifteen months time, and he is four years older than Alan." Scott's protested with force at his father's words.

"Don't you think I know that Scott?" Jeff argued back in a slightly more irritated voice.

"I know Alan, Gordon and the rest of you are too young. I know he doesn't have the experience the rest of you have either, but the fact is Scott if I don't include Alan in the same way as the rest of you I'm going to lose him." Scott Tracy emphasised with his father, he knew if Alan was to be included in this project he would only accept if he wasn't treated differently despite his age.

"He's going to have you and your brothers watching him, and there is no way he is flying anything on his own, and has to follow orders to the latter." Jeff stood and walked around his personal office, he stopped and picked up a photo frame of his family.

"He will still be twenty when we start this up dad, so for the record I'm objecting on that ground." Scott spoke again but without the anger he had before.

"We send eighteen year olds on to the front line to fight in wars Scott, but I know what you mean, I also have my doubts about including Alan in this operation this much. If I think about it though part of me can't believe I'm thinking of sending any of my kids into such a dangerous situation." Jeff Tracy ran his thumb over the image of him and his five boys.

"Dad you're doing a fantastic thing, do you know how many lives we might save?" Scott got up from the chair and made his way over to his father.

"I know, I remind myself of that every single day because if I don't all I think of is the idea that I might loose one of you by doing this." Jeff confessed in a sombre tone and Scott put his hand on his shoulder for support.

"Alright, Alan's in, but he's going to be a nightmare in terms of listening to you and me." Jeff nodded as he put down the photo frame; Alan had a tendency to do as he felt was right and also to not fully consider the consequences of his own actions.

"He will be exchanging with John anyway for six months of the year on the satellite." Jeff added as he looked around the room, he had a feeling he would be dragging Alan into this sound proofed and secluded room for a yelling match or two in the next few years.

"You're kidding?" Scott turned around as his father spoke.

"Well John can't stay up there forever!" Jeff added as Scott smirked.

"He's going to hate that." Scott replied as he finished the rest of his drink.

"Yeah I know, but he can't have everything." Jeff returned to his desk and looked at his still smirking son.

"What?" Jeff added as he picked up his own drink before looking at his watch for the time. This room purposely had no windows so if someone was visiting they would be secluded from the rest of the islands goings on in here.

"Just make sure you tell Alan about that part in here. As I was going to test the sound proofing in this room by firing up my jets engines, but you having a yelling match with Alan is probably just as loud so you can save me a job." Jeff didn't see the funny side; he knew Alan would protest about satellite duty already.

"I kind of hoped yelling matches with Alan were behind me?" Jeff confessed.

"Dad you're always going to clash with Alan, but this time just make sure there is some sun between the storm clouds." Scott added wisely before collecting his father's cup and leaving the room.

"Alan!" The blond heard his name being called in an irritated way from behind him and turned to look in the direction of the pool.

"What are you doing up? Are you feeling okay?" Virgil Tracy spotted the slowly moving form of his brother creeping up the steps heading back to the villa, but he wasn't letting Alan off for it.

Alan rolled his eyes as his second eldest brother moved quickly towards him and away from the sun deck and seating area.

"I'm fine, I just needed some air." Alan walked back down the steps and moved towards his brother who wrapped his arms around him and assisted him back towards where he had been previously sitting.

"Virgil I'm fine." Alan did as his brother requested and sat down in the lounger but when Virgil started playing doctor and asking him about how he was feeling the blond hit his limit.

"Virgil…I'm fine, meaning I'm okay, meaning stop playing dad." Alan didn't shout at his brother but his tone was firm and a laugh then came from the direction of the pool.

"That told you Virg." Gordon Tracy finished his lap by smiling at this brother's conversation, before he pulled himself out of the water and sitting on the edge of the pool. Virgil surrendered his attempts to check on Alan and instead pulled up another chair next to his brother.

"What are doing up at this time?" Gordon asked Alan who looked at him with confusion about the question he had just asked.

"What are you doing swimming at this time? I thought you couldn't swim at night because of mosquito's?" Alan asked as he examined the pool area, the island was definitely designed for luxury he considered.

"There is a chemical in the water that they don't like and dad has put up these special heat and light repelers, they work great. Oh, and I couldn't sleep." Alan looked to where his brother was pointing to the soothing light that was being cast over the patio. The lighting all over the island was low level and relaxed; Alan decided that was probably to benefit John's star gazing.

"What your excuse, you should be resting?" Virgil asked and Alan shot him a glance for being overprotective again.

"I couldn't sleep, and I found John when I went for a walk." Alan rubbed his eyes and moved his seat so he was lying back looking up at the sky.

"That's funny because you look exhausted." Alan didn't reply to Virgil's worry, instead Gordon did by getting out of the pool and giving his brothers a light showering of water as he moved to sit by them.

"Gordon!" Virgil protested at the light dampening and threw him his towel from another patio chair.

"I hear you made peace with Scott, it's nice to know." Virgil commented as he examined his brother's mood. He had spoken to Scott about Alan's demeanour and his concerns about him.

"Yeah, we called a truce I suppose." Alan spoke half-heartedly and Gordon took it in the wrong manner.

"Are you still mad at him, or at us?" Gordon sat up concerned and asked his brother in an anxious tone.

"No I'm not mad at any of you I suppose, we were all being played. Sorry my minds just a bit…well everywhere at the minute." Alan yawned if only to confirm his words and his brothers shared a concerned look.

"Come on, we all should be in bed the last few days have taken there toll." Virgil stood up and tried to encourage his brothers to follow his lead, but Gordon spotted his elder brother approaching their position.

"Hey John, come to join the midnight party? Well very early midnight party" Gordon consulted his watch before smiling at John as he walked around the pool towards their position.

"What are you two doing up?" John asked Gordon and Virgil.

"We could ask you that?" Gordon jokingly mirrored the question they all seemed to be asking.

"Well I can't star gaze in the day Gordo, but you can swim in the day!" John smirked at Gordon before shifting his gaze to Alan and then giving his elder brother a concerned look.

"Well now you're here John you can come to bed too?" Gordon laughed and John gave him an amused look.

"Er… we're not really in to that sort of thing Virg, but hey whatever you're in too is fine by us." Gordon replied for John and but his arm around the blond to support his words. Virgil shook his head in annoyance at the way his two younger brothers had taken his words but used the distraction Gordon created to nod to John the he wanted some help with Alan.

"Come on we're all going to be killed if Scott or dad finds us awake and out here." Virgil moved closer to Alan, but Alan spoke to pause them all in their tracks.

"Too late." Alan saw his brother and father on the balcony above them as he moved to sit up in the lounger.

"What are you all doing awake, especially you." Scott stormed over to his brothers and indicted especially to Alan who was still seated.

"Were all just going to bed now Scott." John informed Scott and his father.

"Your damn right about that son. Bed, all of you, and I want you all up for breakfast at eight." Jeff spoke and got the attention of all his sons.

"Boys what are you waiting for, bed now." This time his sons moved from their position and started towards the stairs.

Jeff turned and watched his sons walk back up the steps towards the villa, noticing Alan looked unwell and was being supported by Virgil and John, so he followed quickly in pursuit.

Alan Tracy said his goodnights to his brothers before entering his bedroom and heading straight to the bathroom for some pain relief. He swallowed the tablets with some water before shutting the mirrored cabinet only to see a reflection of his father standing in the doorway to the bathroom.

"You're not supposed to be taking medication yet Alan." Jeff looked concerned as Alan had completely dismissed both the doctors and Virgil's orders.

"It's aspirin, I'll live." Alan spoke before moving past his father to sit on his bed. Jeff looked at him blankly before moving over to him.

"What?" Alan asked calmly as his father stood before him patiently.

"Get in bed." Jeff pointed out again but Alan angled his head in disagreement.

"I can't sleep." Jeff dismissed that instantly, he knew Alan was still truly exhausted. Jeff pulled the blankets back from his bed and moved to sit on the bed next to Alan.

"What are you doing?" Alan quizzed his father as he was gently encouraging him to lay down in his bed. Alan found himself unable to resist and was quickly being covered up by his blankets.

"What's does it look like? I'm tucking you in." Jeff made himself more comfortable as he sat upright overlooking his son on the bed.

"You do know I'm not four right? I don't need you to tuck me in." Alan pointed out as he fought his eyes that were closing and realised how quickly he was going too succumbed to sleep despite his mind swirling with information.

"Yeah I know, but however old you lot get I'm still going to keep a close eye on you, and that includes letting me have my fatherly moments." Both knew that Jeff had rarely put Alan to bed when he was younger, and the billionaire was had found himself being more fatherly to his sons lately especially in a more caring way.

"Now sleep." Jeff grazed his sons flaxen locks with his fingertips and was instantly reminded of the nights when he came in late from work to find his precious wife sleeping in their bed.

As the first rays of sunlight were cast on the villa Alan Tracy had decided on his next path, the blond lifted the cell phone and pushed dial.

"Lana?" Alan felt a soothing feeling wash over his body as he heard the soft English accent of the woman he loved. Lana had become a big part of his life over the past three years, but he had desperately tried to keep his father from knowing about them being a couple. He knew he had fell head over heals for her, she made him feel like Rachel used too, happy. He knew though that asking her to give up her studies to follow him around the world while he was racing was too much to ask, so they had broken their relationship in the last eight months.

"Alan, I was worried about you, I tried to call but…" Alan reassured her, the worry in her voice was clear.

"It alright, I'm fine." Alan paused that had been a terrible lie.

"I take it that's an 'Alan Tracy fine' not a 'normal definition' of being okay?" She knew him too well.

Alan supported him head with his hand as he sat on the balcony recliners.

"Yeah, that's about right." Alan mused his voice soft and low.

"I'm sorry about Richard, I know how much he meant to you. I just can't believe he's dead." Lana could determine Alan's emotions just by his tone; she sometimes questioned whether anyone knew Alan better then her.

"Alan, you can talk to me. Please don't pretend this isn't hurting you… I love you." Alan caved; he knew that, she had been the only bright part of the past three years.

"I need to see you, I need…to talk about things with you. It's a bit more complicated than you think." Alan suddenly felt a million decisions run around his head.

"I call you again later and tell you when I can meet you." Alan felt some sense of relief that he would be seeing Lana soon; he hadn't intended a relationship with her when they had met but he had fallen for her without even realising it.

"Alright, I'll see you soon." Alan heard the concern in her voice still despite his reassurances.

"Don't worry about me I just need to see you, that will make me feel better I promise." Alan explained.

"Lana." Alan paused; he knew she was listening intently.

"You know how I feel about you, don't you?" At the minute it was the closest to revealing his feelings that he was able to do. He had learnt from his father how to cut off your emotions to lower your chances of pain; however he only truly learnt this lessons consequence when he felt the pain of Rachel's death.

"Alan I have known how you feel about me for three years, despite you barely saying it." There was an element of both humour and love in her words and Alan smiled at hearing them. However twinges of guilt also hit him, 'I love you' were said over and over in his head about Lana, but they never managed to escape past his lips.

"Bye." Alan ended the call knowing how he truly felt about her, and being determined that they should restart their relationship, especially now he had made another crucial decision in his future.

Jeff Tracy's feet felt the cool waters of the ocean pass over them it was early on the island and he was attempting an early morning walk to reduce the high stress levels he had had recently. He was enjoying intently having his boys back with him, despite Alan's delicate condition. He also knew Alan and he had at least made some progress over the last two days but there was still a long way to go. In response to this worries Jeff pulled something out of the pocket on his shorts and looked at it with a smile before continuing up the beach. The sun was rising slowly but a cooling breeze swept along the shore and aided to calm the billionaire. However he stopped again in his tracks when he saw the distant figure of his son sitting on the beach looking out to the ocean.

"What are doing up Alan?" Jeff noted that his son seeing shocked out of his own world by his words and hadn't seen him approaching.

"I've slept enough." There was little point in arguing that despite Jeff knowing he was wrong, and he moved to sit by his son on the sand.

"You looked a little lost." Jeff spoke softly and Alan seemed to regain the neutral composure Jeff was used to dealing with.

"I'm quitting F1 after this season." Jeff looked at him with surprise, that was the last thing he expected Alan to say, but Alan only continued to look out to the horizon.

"Er…Are you sure?" Alan sighed and half smiled, although it was only a reaction to his father's words.

"I thought that would make you happy? You never wanted me to do it anyway." Alan replied and glanced at his father, his voice gave nothing away of his feelings.

"I don't you to do something to make me happy Alan. I need this to be your decision, not mine." Jeff replied.

"It is. I don't want to do this without Rick." Jeff nodded and also looked out to the horizon.

"Alan…I should have supported you more than I have, I do regret that you know." Alan didn't reply and Jeff knew he was still angry at him.

"You know if this was the other way around I would have really shouting at you if you had accused me of things I hadn't done, your being probably too kind with me." Jeff confessed and Alan met his eyes and shrugged slightly. The lack of anger at him from Alan was concerning, as it seemed like Alan didn't care anymore.

"You called me a liar, a drug addict and a traitor to this family. I'm not sure how we can more past that?" Alan's voice took a slightly more firm tone due to him reliving the arguments with his father over the past weeks, but his sadness over Richard's death dominantly overshadowed his feelings.

"Will you give me a chance to make things right?" Jeff almost begged for the chance and Alan glanced over to him.

"I was just surprised that you would ever think I would do some of those things, I know things are bad between us but I never thought you could think so little about me." Alan confessed and noted his fathers eyes showed nothing but guilt.

"Know matter what you lot do or could ever do, there isn't a second of my life went I couldn't love you boys, you're my sons." Alan couldn't look at Jeff to see that he meant it, in fear the armour he had built up over the year might crack.

"Alan all I need you to do is give me a chance to be the father I should have been to you." Jeff met again the cerulean eyes of his son and Alan heard the desperation in his father's voice.

"I didn't think Barton was a good influence on your life and I know that he and I have had a lot of issues, but part of me was jealous of the relationship you had with him and not with me." Jeff surprised him by admitting that to Alan, and the blond seemed amazed also.

"I didn't work with Rick to get back at you. We just got on really well, he seemed to get me and wanted to help me." Alan explained the relationship he had had with Richard, only then realising that he was no longer present in his life. A wave of guilt hit the young man and Jeff saw it in his eyes.

"Alan you're not to blame for his death." Jeff explained sensing his sons troubling emotions.

"He would still be here if Peter knew nothing about Rick and me." Alan's frustration and fury was clear and part of him seriously wished he could get some revenge.

"Yeah, and you wouldn't have been hurt if I hadn't introduced Peter into our lives. The fact is we don't know what's going to happen next, but I do know Richard would never want you to feel responsible for this." Jeff wrapped his arm around his sons' shoulders as a means of comfort to his son. Alan Tracy sat close to his father in silence for a few more minutes before speaking.

"I want to see him." Jeff seemed confused and Alan saw that in his face.

"Peter, I want to see him." Jeff held Alan arm and gently turned Alan towards him.

"You can't be serious, Alan he tried to kill you. I don't want you within 1000 kilometres of him." Jeff's voice was still raised in shock of Alan's decision.

"I need to see him; I just want to know why he did this?" Alan explained his decision and his face was determined and focused, and Jeff knew there was no chance of Alan changing his mind.

"I'm coming with you." Jeff spoke with just as much certainty in his voice as Alan had and Alan nodded in reply. Both men considered the events again of the past weeks and looked back out at the ocean.

Jeff Tracy ended his call to his eldest son who was still on their island in the Pacific, the contrast between the view he and his son had at this moment was vast. Jeff scanned the grey walls and black metal bars of the police station. He had been interviewed about the events between him, Alan and Peter for the past hour and a half, however Alan was still being questioned about the event. He and Alan had left the island early this morning to come to New York for this, and Alan was still adamant he wanted to see Peter Hemmings himself. Jeff was disturbed from his thought by his son entering the room.

"Hey, did it go okay?" Jeff stood as Alan entered the room.

"I suppose, I just told them what happened." Alan replied, however the event had been tiring on his emotions of guilt and anger, but they weren't about to be eased anytime soon he considered as a police officer entered the room.

"You can see Hemmings now; he's in the secure unit." Alan nodded to him and Jeff held Alan's arm as he attempted to move.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Jeff's own anger at Peter was bubbling up also.

Alan only nodded in reply.

Peter Hemmings sat on the soft floor of the padded walled cell. He had been moved in here from a standard cell on the psychiatric unit last night after slamming himself into the walls repeatedly. The new environment meant nothing to him but still he stared at the beige cube surrounding him that was only broken on one side by a wall of metal bars. The small man held his knees close to his chest and continued to stare into space.

Alan Tracy sighed before he walked into the room that on one side was a solid wall while the other was the bars of the cell that contained Peter Hemmings. Alan was surprised to see the confused and erratic state that Peter was in, and he felt a twinge of sadness for him, before remembering what he had done to Richard.

"Alan? Jeff? You came to see me?" It was said in a child's voice and Peter looked surprised to see them, Alan noted there was an overwhelming joy in Peter's voice.

"We came to ask you about Richard Barton." Jeff's voice was stern and dominant and Peter looked taken aback by his former boss's attitude towards him, and his face dropped in response.

Peter took in the two men before him on the other side of the bars; Jeff was stood next to Alan in a protective manner, while the young blond just looked at him with venom.

"You killed him." It was more of a statement than a question, but Peter looked puzzled by what was being aimed at him, again the child like persona was present.

"I thought we could be a family, all I ever wanted was a family, people I could care about." Peter ignored Alan's question, and the two Tracy men noticed Peter seemed passive to them being there.

"Peter you tried to murder Alan, and you killed someone." Peter moved closer to the bars, and Jeff protectively moved to stand in front of his son.

"He didn't want to be there, he didn't act like your son, I did, and I wanted to help. To be a family." Despite being told that Peter had had a psychotic break only seeing him now did Jeff realise how fractured Peter's mind was.

"So you took it into your own hands to fix things to suit yourself?" Alan fought back with his voice raised, which seemed to scare Peter who moved backwards away from him.

"I just wanted a family, and you didn't want to be part of your family." Jeff couldn't help but look over his shoulder to Alan to gauge his expression at this idea; Alan only met his eyes with a hint of remorse.

"What about Richard? Did he just get in the way? Was that meant for me?" Peter looked at Alan directly, and Alan was truly surprised by the bemused look on his face.

"I just wanted a family." He spoke with such sadness and despair.

"We could go on holiday together, play soccer, and have dinner, a family…my family…We could…" Peter turned as he spoke and moved to sit back on the floor hunched up near the wall, his rambling about a family continued and any notice of the Tracy's presence was gone.

"Alan he isn't going to be able to help you." Alan knew that now, although he was still angry that he couldn't have the answers he wanted.

Jeff cast his eyes back over Peter's form he was continuing to talk to himself discussing family outing and plans. Jeff could clearly see the damaging impact that growing up without a stable home or family had had on Peter, and for that he had such sadness. He then turned to his own son and considered that Alan too had not had a good childhood either, and how much that had impacted Alan also.

"Let's go son." Jeff put his arm of Alan's shoulder and encouraged him towards the door. Jeff signalled to the guard to open the outside door as Peter got up and approached Alan again.

"You at least got one parent." It was whispered so quietly Alan barely heard it, but the impact of those childlike words had on the young man was immense.

"Let's get out of here." Alan walked past his father who was in the doorway and headed for the exit. Jeff found him a few minutes later leaning again the car.

"Are you okay?" Alan nodded, despite not really being sure. He wanted to be angry, to hate Peter more, but his final words to him kept running around his mind. He hated to admit but Peter was right, he had never considered that he should at least be grateful for having one parent, even if it wasn't a great relationship that he had with his father.

Jeff placed his hand of Alan's shoulder as he stood beside his son.

"Come on I'll take you home." Jeff moved to get into the car, but Alan stopped him first.

"I need to see Lana and get back in training. Any chance you can drop me at the airport?" Jeff glanced at Alan, part of him was worried that Alan would like before move more distant again once he had left to continue the season. Alan seemed to notice the disappointment his father had in reaction to his words.

"There's only three months left now, I need to complete his season I owe Rick that." Alan spoke softly as he noticed the afternoon air become more damp and gentle rain began to fall.

"I know I'm just a bit obsessed about knowing where you are at the minute." Jeff confessed while Alan smirked in appreciation and embarrassment.

"I'll call." Alan added and Jeff gave him an ironic look.

"I will." The blond added.

"Actually I was hoping I could see you racing and maybe get to meet this girl of yours that I have heard so much about, mostly from Gordon though." Alan smirked this time with embarrassment clearly shown.

"Maybe." Jeff nodded with a smile before both Tracy's got into the car.

The journey to the airport was made in reasonably but comfortable silence, but Alan was struggling to get rid off Peter's last words and the advice about Jeff he had gotten from Rick. He looked over to his father who was driving and considered the next path he could go down. He knew it was him that had rejected his father after Rachel had died, and from that day resisted all attempts to build bridges that Jeff had tried.

"How about I bring Lana to your charity ball next month?" Jeff looked across to his son with shock.

"I'd love that." Alan nodded in reply, but continued to speak his mind afterwards.

"Don't get too used to this, were going to argue you know." Alan explained but Jeff only smiled.

"I know. I'm not expecting to be able to snap my fingers Alan and you to have the perfect relationship, but I won't let things get as bad as this again." Jeff pulled the car to a holt as they had arrived at the airport.

"I er…have this for you. You have had it before the night Peter ran you off the road, but I know you don't remember it." Jeff pulled out a small box from his jacket that was on the backseat of the car.

Alan looked intrigued and he noticed his father examining him closely as he opened the box.

In seeing the silver watch Alan looked to his father with gratitude.

"Thank you." Jeff nodded and fought the unexpected emotions that he had. Alan read the card before leaning over to his father for a hug, noting he couldn't recall ever initiating an embracing his father before now. Jeff exhaled with such appreciation and held his son tightly despite the confined situation of being in the car.

"I'll see you soon son, don't forget to call me tomorrow okay?" Jeff reluctantly let go of his son after an extended embrace.

"Sure." Alan open the car door with his unoccupied hand and began to step out, before realising that if he and his father wanted to move forward there was something else he was going to have to start doing.

"Bye…dad." At that minute it was a good job Jeff Tracy was seated as the surprise of Alan speaking those words to him after so much had happened would have been enough to knock him from his feet.

Jeff watched his son walk into the airport terminal from his car mirror, he couldn't remember the first time he heard Alan call him 'dad' but this moment he now would never forget. He looked down to his wedding ring, he had taken for granted too many moment of his marriage, that was a mistake he wasn't about to repeat with Alan anymore.

This story has only the epilogue to go which will tie up this story and yes there is still a little more to go. It is planned and just needs writing, it is set all from Jeff's point of view. I have completely re written and re edited this story lately and every chapter has been changed. I would like to thank anyone who has read it, especially someone who emailed me to ask me to re post this and to finish it. Resentment will be finished soon.


	13. Chapter 13

Resentment is complete. I refused to put up the last chapter until I was happy with the ending, and that it reflected the two years of my life that I have put into writing Resentment. I hope this was suitable.

Chapter Thirteen – Epilogue

Sacrifices, Guardians and Goodbyes.

In a lesson years ago a teacher asked her pupils to decide if they were either optimistic or pessimistic regarding their outlook on life. Alan Tracy sat in that classroom and recalled how many times people had told him he was 'lucky'. Doctors had told him he was 'lucky' that he didn't die at birth, and 'lucky' to have survived the accidents that killed both Rachel and her parents. At school his friends said he was 'lucky' to be born to a billionaire, and his head teacher said he was 'lucky' not to have been expelled from school again. When he walked the line of danger, either self inflicted or accidental, people always said he was 'lucky' to have finished on the fortunate side. Alan considered that all this 'luck' should have made him optimistic about his life; the problem was in all of his life, he had never felt 'lucky'. Does a 'lucky' person never get to meet their mother, and have to suffer the impact of her death? Does a 'lucky' person get to see so many people that they care about die? Or are they just 'lucky' if they can live with the impact of all that? Those thoughts Alan considered surely would class him as pessimistic, but that wasn't right either. That day he wrote down that he was neither optimistic nor pessimistic, he was realistic; but right now reality was the last thing he wanted to know.

Alan sat bolt up right on the wooden bench and unconsciously moved his legs closer to him as he shivered in the breeze. His t-shirt and jeans were more fitting to a warmer climate, but he had left so abruptly that he had only the spare clothing that was stored in his car to wear. Alan ignored the chill on his skin and continued to examine the scene before him; he had never been here before, he had never wanted too. Even now that was true, he was only here for one reason; this would be the last place anyone would look for him. A grey haired gardener smiled warmly at him as he moved in to Alan's view pushing a wheelbarrow of shrubs, Alan couldn't find the heart to smile back. As he watched the old man move away from him and back onto the grey concrete path his keys fell from his lap and onto the bench beside him. At that moment in time his keys and wallet were all he had on him; his cell phone had been thrown into the nearest bin at a fuel station. Until he gotten into this state Alan really had made no conscious decision to come here, he just drove and drove, thinking only of the mechanics and curves of the roads. However when he realised he had driven from coast to coast he needed somewhere to hide for a few days somewhere he wouldn't be found. Somehow he remembered the name of this place from a long overheard conversation between his brothers. His brothers, Alan recalled the fun he had with his brothers four months ago when he had just won his Championship trophy.

_Flashback_

"_Alan!" Gordon yelled to his brother through the small crowd of engineers and track staff that were congratulating him on winning the world championship title. Alan nodded to his brother and attempted to make his way over to him._

"_You did it little brother, and what a race, it was fantastic!" Gordon didn't hide his pride or joy at Alan's achievement and neither did Virgil or Scott who approached him next._

"_Well done Alan. Congratulations." Virgil hugged his little brother as best as he could as Alan was still holding his large trophy. To Virgil, Alan looked pleased but not ecstatic; he knew that Richard Barton's death three months ago was still overshadowing Alan's feelings of joy at winning the title. _

"_Come here kiddo. All those nights taking you to karting seem to have paid off now." Scott hugged his brother lovingly; he had enjoyed watching the race from the stadium and knew his brother had worked hard to win the title he had wanted for so many years._

"_Scott, not in front of everyone." Alan half heartedly moaned at his brother's lingering embrace, as his teammates and technical staff were surrounded them while congratulating each other._

"_Alright, I'll save that till later then." Scott pulled away and Virgil smirked at Alan's complaint. Scott had been extremely protective of Alan since the incidents with Peter Hemmings._

"_Dad wants you to ring him, he was watching with John in New York." Alan nodded at Scott as he shook hands with a few more members of his pit crew._

"_Yeah I will, I'll just thank this lot first and then I'll call him from my dressing room. Why don't you head over to the VIP tent, there'll be enough champagne to drown in I guarantee it." Alan proposed to his brothers the idea, as he was indicated to by his mechanic and trainer to join them._

"_Champagne and pit girls! Sound good, you don't have to ask me twice." Gordon joked and swiftly moved off in the direction Alan had suggested, while Scott and Virgil only smirked._

"_Alan." Scott held back his brother from leaving and moved closer to him so Alan could hear him over the noise that the crowds of Mercedes McLaren staff were making._

"_You're honestly not disappointed about dad are you?" Alan tilted his head, he should have expected this question, he had been asked it at least thirty times in the past four days._

"_No, I don't mind that dad's not here. We'll see him tomorrow anyway; and like I said there was no point him flying out." Alan again explained that he had no problem with his father not being present for his title win._

"_Scott relax, I'm not bothered honestly, he's been at my last three races." All his brothers had asked him if he minded if their father watched the race from home as he was unwell, despite Jeff being determined to be there._

"_I've got to do a couple of interviews and then I'll ring him, I promise." Alan pushed the point and indicated to Virgil for some backup._

"_Come on Scott; let's catch up with Gordon before he starts entertaining half the pit girl, at the same time." Virgil nodded to Alan and pulled his brother away from the driver._

"_Alan." The blond turned as he heard his name only to be congratulated by more of his friends and colleagues. He had announced his retirement two months ago but still there was surprise that a rookie champion was leaving F1 after one season. Alan had dramatically reduced his press and public promotions in the past months to match his desires for some privacy. As Alan thanked and congratulated the people gathered in the McLaren team area, he realised how much of this opportunity he owed to Richard Barton. A sad smiled crossed Alan's face, he had dreamt about winning this trophy but somehow he couldn't fully express his enthusiasm due to Richard's absence._

_If by sensing his feelings Alan heard someone disagreeing with his thoughts even as they crossed his mind._

"_He would want you to be on top of the world for winning this." Alan turned to his left and smiled lovingly into the brown eyes of his girlfriend. He passed the trophy over to his mechanic and embraced her again in a long hug, and took in her scent. _

"_Put her down, I don't want to see that, she's my sister." Alan broke the embrace with Lana after a few moments after hearing Mark, he then turned to see his teammate and his mum making their way through the crowd towards them._

"_Alright, alright, it was just a hug." Alan replied as Mark smirked at him sarcastically. _

"_Congratulation mate." Mark hugged his team mate with pride._

"_Congratulations yourself, second place isn't bad." Alan smiled, he wouldn't have won at all without Mark, or anyone in this room, and he had made that clear to his friends._

"_Well with you not racing next year, I'm having that trophy for myself." Alan nodded; he hoped his best friend would as well._

"_Thanks for helping me; it's a team victory for sure." Mark smiled at his sister and mom; they were proud of both of him and Alan._

"_You think you could cover for me with these lot for a minutes while a sneak out to call my dad?" Alan asked Mark as he indicated to the team behind him, who nodded in reply._

"_Yeah of course. Where's that trophy gone?" Mark quickly agreed and abruptly left to get the trophy from Alan's mechanic. _

"_Wow that took a lot of convincing." Alan added sarcastically as he watched Mark hold the trophy above his head and toast his crew by covering them in Champagne. _

"_He's just practising for next year." Lana added with a smile and Emma laughed before smiling proudly at her son who was now pouring champagne down his neck._

"_Go call your dad Alan; he'll be very proud of you." Alan turned back and smiled at Emma, she was a great mother in Alan's eyes to both his girlfriend and best friend, and was very welcoming of his relationship with Lana._

"_I will." Alan quickly made his way through the crowd to head back to his dressing room, being congratulated none stop enroute._

_Alan closed the door of his dressing room and appreciated the silence for a moment; today had been amazing, hectic, but amazing. His emotions of sadness and happiness had also been very draining so the silence of his dressing room was a pleasant relief to him. Alan knew that wouldn't last long though so pulled out his cell phone and sat down on the oversized leather couch that was placed against the far wall of the room. _

"_Hey John." Alan smiled as he heard his brother's voice when he answered._

"_Congrat's kid, we watched the race, and didn't doubt you for an instant." John expressed his happiness for Alan, as his father entered the room and noticed him on the phone._

"_Is that Alan?" Alan heard his father in the background, he knew his father had planned to be here but his doctor had advised he stay in New York and recover from a chest infection if he wanted to attend his charity banquet tomorrow night. Jeff had overruled the doctor, but Alan and his brothers fought back in concern over Jeff's health. _

"_Hey dad." Alan spoke as he made his way into his bathroom._

"_Alan. Congratulations son, you did really well." Alan could here his father was sincere and so was grateful for his support._

"_Thanks. Are you feeling better?" Alan asked his father, as he wiped down his face and neck with a cloth. _

"_Yes, and thanks to the four of you wanting John to stay with me and not go to the race, I've barely been able to leave my bed." Jeff pointed out as he looked at his middle son with a glare._

"_That is what the doctor said to do." Alan pointed out to his father, knowing his brothers also felt that way._

"_I'm fine, and I would have liked to have been there to see you win." Jeff added regretfully before coughing severely._

"_You did, it was no different than on T.V. unless you desperately wanted to see Gordon flirting with every pit girl here and drinking his weight in free alcohol." Jeff rolled his eyes and sat back in the chair in was in, Gordon always liked to get into the spirit of an event._

"_I'm sure he will do that tomorrow night anyway. As long as you're okay with me not being there?" Alan threw his head back but held in his annoyance._

"_I'm fine about it; I'll see you tomorrow at the party." Alan pulled of his outer race suit as he continued to speak to his father._

"_Alright, I'll let you get back to celebrating, but remember how old you are, one glass of champagne!" Alan shook his head lightly._

"_Sure dad. See you tomorrow." Alan smirked slightly._

"_Yes, I'm completely convinced that will happen and I can see that cheeky smile from here. Well done Alan, I'm proud of you." Jeff smiled himself at the last part of his sentence, his relationship with Alan had improved dramatically over the past three months._

"_Thanks dad. Bye." Alan closed his phone and lent back against the cold tiled walls of the bathroom._

"_Thanks Rick." Alan smiled as he appreciated his friend's contribution to his victory. The blond started at himself in the mirror on the opposite wall for a moment more before pulling off his t-shirt and entering the main room again. He stopped dead at the site before him._

"_Hi." Alan could sit and listen to her soft warm voice all day, but at the minute he was slightly distracted by something else, as his girlfriend was perched on his dressing table smiling at him._

_To Alan, Lana was beautiful; but she also had the character and charm to match. They had grown up together while they had been dating, and spent their time together at the track, or on video games or at the cinema, she was his best friend. He had fell in love with her as his friend before considering his desire towards her._

_Lana wasn't the sort of girl the media expected the youngest son of a billionaire to be dating though, she was family orientation, down to earth and a real tomboy. She did sexy by messy hair and minimal make-up, she did casual by a t-shirt and jeans that hugged her curves, showing what she had but saving that for Alan. She had told him when she was seventeen and he had been waiting for her to get ready for a date that she didn't know how to do beautiful. That she had been brought up around cars, race tracks and men, that being beautiful was unknown to her. He had told her that day that that was the stupidest thing she had ever said, and her could never think of her as anything but beautiful. Since they had ended their relationship though Lana had changed, but so had he. She now had more confidence and self assurance than the teenager he had dated, in the months apart she seemed to have found more of whom she was and what she wanted. _

"_Err…hey." Lana smiled at Alan's reaction and swallowed the nervousness she felt at being so exposed to him. Since Alan had turned eighteen she had been worried about being enough for him, in a way she hadn't before. Due to Alan having the family, money and opportunities that he had she was anxious that he would also want a different sort of girlfriend. That hadn't happened though, Alan was still interested only in her, that and by that she learnt the confidence and attitude that she deserved to have._

"_Is that my shirt?" Alan lent against the door frame his eyes never leaving her, just running over and over her form._

"_Yeah." She replied casually, she had heard Alan in the bathroom when she entered and decided to give her boyfriend her own congratulatory gift._

"_You know I really need to wear that shirt." Alan moved towards where she was sitting and noted she raised her legs as he approached on to the chair making his shirt ride higher on her thigh._

"_Really? You haven't got another?" Lana asked playfully as she saw Alan point to his bare chest._

"_No, that's the one I really want. The only one." Alan's blue eyes met Lana's brown, enough said. She reached out and embraced him._

"_Thank you." Lana looked up puzzled from her position wrapped around her boyfriends toned abs._

"_For?" She questioned as she felt his tanned bare skin._

"_Everything. I wouldn't have got into F1, stopped running away or made up with my dad if it wasn't for you." Lana smiled, and she considered the impact Alan had had on her life also, she wasn't the shy, overlooked, and confused girl she once was. _

"_Your welcome." She pulled him down until their lips met. _

"_You know I did lock that door?" Lana indicated over her shoulder from where they were. _

"_I'm so glad." Alan scooped her into his arms and made his way to the couch._

"_You look beautiful…and amazingly sexy." Lana dipped her head and smiled unnervingly. _

"_I'm glad you like it." She kissed him again._

_His strong hands moved from supporting her position on the small of her back around to unbuttoning his shirt. _

"_Then let me thank you properly for all your help." Alan smiled as he pulled Lana on to the couch and positioned himself over her._

In hindsight, Alan considered what was some of the best hours of his life were crucial to his present situation. If those hours hadn't happened, maybe things would have been different. The last three months would have definitely been different, and it all started with a conversation he would never forget.

_Flashback_

"_Hi." Alan stopped as he heard Lana speak to him from where she was sat on the bottom step of the wooden stairs to the left of him. He questioned her tone of voice before approaching her, placing his keys on the coffee table on the way._

"_Hey. Are you okay?" Alan was puzzled by her choice of sitting position and the unusual look on her face._

"_Yeah, how was your father?" Alan considered what she had said. He had just seen Jeff in New York along with his brothers, and had been totally overwhelmed by what they had to say, or more importantly what they had being planning. His father had explained all of his plans about his new secret rescue business, and Alan had been impressed by the idea and his achievement. However he was totally shocked when his father asked him to join his brothers and work for him in the business. Alan had returned to California with his mind in overdrive after promising not to mention this to anyone, and to consider his father's offer._

"_He wants me to work for him?" Alan had to leave it at that, but he had already decided on his answer._

"_Oh, do you want too?" It had been five weeks since Alan had won the championship and he had no plans to do anything else yet._

"_I only just realised what he was asking me to do, and what a sacrifice it would be." Alan moved to sit beside Lana and wrapped his arm around her while she lent on his chest feeling the leather of his jacket beneath her cheek._

"_What's wrong?" Alan knew there was something troubling her. He tone was sad and troubled._

"_Nothing." Lana spoke to his chest before half smiling at him and moving off the stairs and into the kitchen. Alan watched her leave for a moment before following, they both had really enjoyed living together in the past month in the new house, or so he thought?_

"_Do you not like it here?" Alan entered the kitchen and stopped as he saw Lana sit herself on the sideboards of the kitchen._

"_Yes, of course." Her eyes shifted around the room nervously, she had transferred her college course and whole life in the past weeks to live her permanently. Her mother, brother and niece were also moving here soon and she was looking forward to beginning this new chapter of her life with Alan. _

"_What have I done wrong?" Alan held his hands outstretched and looked concerned as he moved closer to his girlfriend._

"_Nothing." Lana pulled him closer and wrapped her arms around his jacket and stared into his pleading eyes. Her tone told him she was lying._

"_Could you stay here with me, like this, forever?" Lana asked the question he had been considering since his father had asked him to work for him._

"_Why are you asking?" Alan knew why he was considering it, but why was Lana?_

"_Just answer me truthfully." Alan eyes never left hers and told her the one decision he had instantly made after his father offered him the job. _

"_I love you." Lana never expected that, and was stunned by his words. A silence passed between them._

"_Alan, in four years you have never said those words to me. I knew why you never said them and I know that you do love me, but… why now are you saying them?" Alan Tracy breathed deeply._

"_I was scared to show you…to tell you that because." Alan moved away and turned to face the window leaning his hands onto the black marble worktop. He needed to say this, it had been inside him too long._

"_Every woman I have ever loved has died… Rachel, Rachel's mom Monica, I was even close to my grandmother for a time, and then there's my mom." Alan continued to look out of the window at the garages and lawns, this was the closest he had let anyone in since Rachel's death._

"_All of them loved you Alan, and so do I." Alan turned and moved back to his girlfriend and took his previous position. _

"_I didn't let you in because I don't want to let you go. I haven't been happy since Rachel died not unless I have been with you. A lot of people have been stolen from my life so there is no way I'm choosing to leave you." Alan lifted his hand and grazed Lana's brown wavy hair and kissed her lips gracefully. She met his eyes before speaking._

"_Alan…I'm pregnant." The first response in his mind was shock, and then dread, and then fear and Lana saw it all._

"_Say something." She whispered as the blond looked away before rubbing his hands through his hair._

"_Are you okay? What if there's something wrong... What if it's me?" Alan looked almost distraught by the end of his sentence and memories and thoughts seemed to be haunting him._

"_What are you talking about?" Lana held him to stop him moving aimlessly._

"_Alan were having a baby, but if you don't want…" Alan looked up instantly, she had him all wrong._

"_Of course I want, I just want to make sure you okay." That second Lana understood what he meant and why he had such fear in his eyes. _

"_Alan your mom dying is nothing to do with you, or our baby, I'm fine, and our baby will be fine." Alan looked back at the brown eyes he had become memorised with when she landed in his arms over four years ago. Lana felt such empathy for the man she loved and the painful feelings he had now._

_Alan took in the information and his feelings for the woman before him, and realised something he could never had done before now._

"_I probably would have done the same thing as him, and reacted the same way." Alan knew he was muttering his own thoughts by the expression on Lana's features, as he cupped her face with his hand._

"_What?" Lana was confused; as Alan seemed truly enlightened by his own thoughts._

"_My dad… He didn't want to risk the woman he loved for me." Lana saw the empathy Alan now had for his father and the choice's he made all those years ago._

"_I understand why he didn't want me; he didn't want to risk losing my mom." Alan still held Lana's face stroking her cheek softly._

"_You're not going to have to make those choices Alan, it was an accident. I love you, and our baby will love you." Tears rolled down her face as she spoke, Alan was as emotional as she had ever seen him, but still no tears fell from his eyes._

Jeff Tracy continued to admire the well kept gardens and flower beds that surrounded the path he was following. Despite the impact of time he knew exactly where he was heading, however he didn't know why? He had called Scott when he landed in New York to ask him if he had heard anything from Alan, but he knew the answer would be no; and it was. The billionaire sighed deeply at that thought as he knew how Alan felt at this time. He learnt his son's true feelings the day he asked Alan to join him in the South Pacific as part of his rescue organisation. He saw the look of defiance and determination in his sons eyes when he realised joining him would mean giving up someone he loved. He had seen the look before in the eyes of his wife. She had given him that look of 'I can't do that' when he had suggested they abort her fifth pregnancy due to worries of complications. Lucy didn't want to loose someone she loved then, and Alan didn't want to do that that day either. Meeting Lana a few days after Alan's Championship win at his annual charity ball was enough to show him how Alan felt about Lana. Jeff knew Alan would choose Lana over his offer; but he offered him it anyway.

_Flashback…three months earlier…_

_Jeff Tracy nodded and smiled at the joke one of his fellow businessmen made as he stood in a small group on the raised glass platform at Tracy Corporations annual charity ball. This wasn't his idea of a good night, but it was a good cause and for that reason he attended it once a year. Jeff scanned the other wealthy businessmen and women and other rich public faces that had attended this year; these people attended these parties a lot, but he didn't. The billionaire excused himself from the group and shook hands with other people before standing against the glass barrier that looked out over the floor below them. He sighed deeply but kept the smile on his face, his wife had first arranged this event twenty eight years ago to support a charity, the past twenty years though he had come alone. _

_Jeff could remember clearly the last time that they had attended this event together; Lucy had been late to attend as Gordon had been fussy at bedtime so she had stayed longer with him than planned. Jeff remembered standing in the same spot and his wife taking his breath away as she entered the room down the red carpeted stairs. That night her casual mom image was gone, and his wife entered wearing a beautifully fitting white dress with her dark blond hair tide up, she was stunning to him. Jeff was pulled from his thoughts by a waiter offering him a drink, but as his eyes snapped back to the stairs he shook his head to see if his eyes deceived him._

"_Lucy?" Jeff caught only a small glance at the woman in her long white dress before she was hidden by the crowds of people, the billionaire made for the small glass staircase to take him down to the first level. Jeff politely nodded and smiled at a few 'hello's' from his guests as he tried to see the woman again, only then did he realise his stupidity; his wife was dead. _

_Jeff Tracy shut the large glass doors behind him as he slipped out onto the balcony of the top floor building, the skyline of New York City was before him offering him some peace from the chatter of his guests inside. Jeff slipped around the side of the balcony so not to attract attention to his presence and lent against the marble ledge. He breathed deeply knowing that he would be in trouble if John found him outside in the cool night air after being ill over the past week. However the cool night and lack of alcohol out here was the reason he could have a few minutes peace and quite. Jeff scanned the skyline he knew so well before another waiter approached him with a drink. Only when he turned to decline the offer did he see her hidden away in the corner of the balcony._

_Jeff moved closer and examined the woman he had seen on the stairs, up close she had darker hair than his late wife, and brown eyes rather than blue, but still there was something about her. Her makeup was light but defining her dominant features of her eyes and cheeks. Her dress began around her delicate shoulder and draped her toned curves before hitting the floor. Compared to the other women of her age at the party, who were overtly sexualized, superficial and financially motivated her beauty was classic and elegant. That was why she reminded him of Lucy he decided. She looked in her early twenties and by the way she held herself she appeared nervous and out of place in this social situation. If it wasn't for her expensive looking earrings and dress, Jeff probably would have questioned if she had an invitation to this event due to her out of placed attitude._

"_Are you okay?" Jeff noted she looked a little shocked by his presence. _

"_Yes, thank you I'm fine." Jeff didn't look convinced and he must have shown it._

"_I'm just not really used to things like this." She nervously played with the glass in her hands and glanced back out over the skyline._

"_After twenty years, neither am I; and if you want to stay in the real world you never will." A smile passed over her lips, and Jeff found himself being concerned that she may have been here with a man much older than her._

"_I'll bare that in mind." She smiled softly and Jeff took in her voice._

"_Your accent is..." Jeff mused, and stepped closer to the brunette._

"_British." She completed for him, which only reminded him more of Lucy. Jeff Tracy's mind flicked between memories of his wife and being in the present with this woman._

"_Dad." Alan Tracy was amused to find his father in a corner of the nearly deserted balcony with a young woman, but on closer inspection he was even more shocked. _

_Jeff turned at the voice, and instantly felt quite embarrassed at the situation his son had caught him in._

"_Alan." Jeff embraced his son who's focus quickly turned to the woman before him._

"_Well at least I don't have to introduce you two now." Jeff looked puzzled, before a troubling thought passed over his mind._

"_Dad, this is Lana." Alan sensed the unease from his father, and shifted his eyes between the pair feeling he had missed something crucial._

"_Well it was nice to finally meet you Lana, please excuse me for a second." Jeff Tracy smiled at them both before entering the room again, as he turned back he looked at Alan interacting with his girlfriend. His son had picked a woman who was so similar to his mother, a mother that his son had never met. Jeff watched as Alan removed his jacket and wrapped it around Lana's shoulders before holder her close to him. It was at that moment he saw that look in those familiar blue eyes. He had seen it before, Lucy had given him the same look all those years ago, and now in his son's eyes he saw the same emotion. He was in love._

Seeing how Alan reacted with Lana that night and in the following days only provided him with more proof to his son's feelings about Lana, and that was why he was so troubled now. Being led here all began with a phone call from a Los Angeles hospital; his son had been in an accident. Jeff ran over the conversation again in his mind not consciously seeing the man before him.

"Oh, excuse me for getting in your way." Jeff Tracy snapped back into reality as the grey haired man kneeling on the path in front of him spoke.

"No I'm sorry, I was distracted." The billionaire smiled sadly.

"You keep this place very well." Jeff indicated as he scanned peaceful secluded gardens he had just entered. In the distance he could hear the sound of water flowing and birds singing.

"Well I like to try; it's the least these people deserve." The old man indicated to the fields in the distance and smiled warmly, he had been doing this job for over two decades and had enjoyed everyday.

"Yes, they do." Sadness appeared in Jeff's eyes as he too examined the surrounding they were in.

"Visiting?" Jeff turned his attention back to the gardener who was now loading dirt and weeds into his wheelbarrow.

"Yes, but I don't really come here as often as I should." Jeff Tracy had no idea why he said that, but the older man stopped working in respect of the stranger's confession.

"Well as long as you think about him or her, I think they would forgive you; and you're here now; that counts." The old man smiled warmly as he offered his opinion.

"I hope so." Jeff nodded and smiled sadly before moving off back along the path.

He didn't go far before he stopped dead and examined the scene before him. In the distance a lone figure sat on the bench staring at the black granite stone that appeared from the grass.

"Alan." The blond turned and looked at the source of his name being spoken; his father was standing a few metres away from him, and that truly surprised him.

Jeff's mind whirled in astonishment of seeing Alan here, but checking his son's condition was then more important to him.

As Jeff took in the shocked expression on Alan's face he also saw the dark rings of exhausting, pale complexion and large cut on his sons face. Jeff quickly moved to sit by his son.

"Are you alright?" Jeff examined the cut and bruising on Alan's head with worry, before noticing Alan's temperature.

"You're freezing." Jeff pulled off his winter coat and wrapped it around his son's shoulders.

"I've been calling you, Alan I've been really worried about you." Jeff placed his arm on his son's shoulders, his voice troubled but soft.

"Sorry." It was said with little real meaning, and Alan's only reaction was to continuing to examine the stone before them, so Jeff turned to it also. The billionaire swallowed the pain he felt at being here. He knew Alan had never been here before. So why was he here now?

"Why are you here Alan?" Alan glanced at his father beside him before shrugging. He saw the worry and the sadness in his father's eyes all caused by being here.

"I didn't think you would find me here." Jeff nodded in agreement. Alan sounded neither sad nor depressed, just lost.

"I didn't expect too. I just was drawn here somehow." Jeff had had no plans to come here today. He had visited with his sons, excluding Alan, in the past, but now he came here even less as it was too difficult. Jeff Tracy looked back at his wife's beautifully kept grave.

'Lucille Tracy, much adored wife and mother, forever loved and deeply missed'.

His eyes then scanned the form of his youngest son; Alan had gone through to much for anyone, never mind a twenty year old. He held Alan closer to him and looked back at his wife's grave.

_Flashback…_

"_I need to find my son, Alan Tracy he was hit by a car and brought here about eight hours ago." Jeff Tracy had been as impatient as his eldest sons as he arrived at the hospital to find Alan, they had met Jeff at the airport after arriving from Tracy Island just minutes before. They had heard Alan was in a serious but not critical condition and would recover fully in time from a doctor, but that hadn't stopped the rush to get to him._

_The receptionist didn't have time to speak before the doctor beside her took over._

"_So am I." Scott looked at him slightly perplexed and the doctor moved the three men into a quite meeting room to the side of the reception._

"_What do you mean so am I?" Virgil asked impatiently as he closed the door behind him._

"_I was trying to treating your son for a serious head injury and some fractured ribs but he just discharged himself and left the hospital about six hours ago." Jeff looked worried and looked towards Scott._

"_Is he okay?" Scott asked while Virgil tried Alan's cell phone._

"_He should be in hospital; he had a bad head injury that was barely looked at and was in shock which won't help his condition either." The doctor explained and Jeff looked confused to why his son had left._

"_He's not answering." Virgil ended the call with annoyance in his voice._

"_Maybe he went to find Lana?" Scott suggested and his father shook his head in stupidity that he hadn't though of that before now._

"_Thank you doctor." Jeff moved to turn to leave, his sons also._

"_Lana…Lana Hamilton? Your son came in with a young woman named that." Jeff turned back around and nodded in relief that he knew where Alan would now be._

"_Yes, he'll be with her then. It's his girlfriend. Where is she?" Virgil asked as he approached the door again. Doctor King took in the three men before him for a moment before he lowered his head and removed his glasses._

"_I'm sorry… She died." The three Tracy were hit by shock, and stared at the doctor with disbelief._

"_What?" Virgil murmured it, Scott questioned it, and Jeff now knew why Alan wasn't here._

"_She was in the accident with your son but there was nothing we could do for her. She died in your son's arms." Jeff Tracy ran his hand through his hair and sat on the chair behind him. He questioned why yet again his son was being put through this as the doctor excused himself from the room._

"_He's not going to have taken this well." Virgil confessed all their fears from his position lent again one wall of the small room._

"_We have to find him; I'll go to his house." Scott moved towards the door, worry dominated his mind, despite hearing his father's words they didn't stop him, he had to try._

"_He won't be there Scott…Scott!" Jeff knew for certain that would be true but let his son try. Scott confirmed barely an hour later that Alan wasn't their but neither was Alan's wallet, car and phone. Jeff Tracy was worried, his son was gone, and he yet again had no idea where to look, but more so he was deeply disturbed by the idea Alan still couldn't deal with losing someone he loved. The following twenty four hours passed with worry for the elder Tracy's and Jeff decided that he needed to take his search further afield. _

"_He might come back in a few days, Mark said he wants Lana's funeral to be on Friday." Virgil spoke, Jeff noticed, with some hope. He wasn't so convinced, he knew Alan better than that._

"_It's been five days Virgil I don't think he will be anywhere near there now, and Alan won't attend Lana's funeral." Jeff spoke from his taxi cab as he left the airport in New York, he knew that Alan hadn't been to the Tracy residence as John was there, but he had come back as he was running out of places to look for his son. _

"_How do you know dad?" Virgil asked as Jeff passed a signpost to a place that held a lot of memories for him. _

"_He won't go to her funeral Virgil, because Alan doesn't know how to say goodbye." As Jeff ended the phone call to his son he considered what he had just said. In twenty years he had struggled to find much of himself in his youngest son's personality or looks, however now he realised that they did share something in common. He also hadn't learnt how to say goodbye either. _

_The taxi driver altered the direction they were travelling in as instructed by his passenger. The man looked wealthy and he hoped for a decent tip; however he felt slightly sad for him when he stopped the cab at the new destination. As his passenger left he decided he need a lot more tips like the one he had just got if he wanted to end up in a place like this by the look of the Aston Martin in the car park._

"Alan, I'm sorry." Jeff truly did feel such sorrow for his son; he wondered how Alan coped with the hand he had been dealt sometimes. Alan didn't reply he had nothing to say in return. He had no answers, just regrets. For once he sat there and let his father hold him.

"Can I come with you?" Alan turned to face his father, who looked bemused for a moment about what he meant, before realising Alan's reasons for turning down International Rescue were now gone.

"Alan, you don't have to make this decision now." Jeff did want Alan by his side in the rescue business despite his age, and understood Alan's change of decision now Lana was gone, but to him it was too soon for him to be making it.

"Why not? There's nothing here for me now." It was more of a statement than a question. Alan could no longer go back to the family and life he had planed in California with Lana, she was gone and so was his daughter. He couldn't go back there, not now at least. He had come here to his mother's burial ground because it was the source; choices had been made here which had dominated his life without any input from him. However being here gave him no key to the past, but more a decision on the future. He wanted to get as far away from here as possible, so joining his father and brothers seemed the best idea.

"There is always room for you, you're my son." Jeff brushed the cheek of his son, who reminded him so much of Lucy. Scott was right, Alan had little flight, engineering or medical experience, but he did have something crucial to his plans, the desperate desire to save others from harm. That was what Alan Tracy would bring to International Rescue; the rest could be learnt by experience.

Alan knew his true strength came from his pain of losing people he had loved, he turned it into a fighting courage, and he had a feeling he was going to need the in International Rescue. Right now though he needed to not feel so alone, he moved into his father's arms and Jeff responded. Jeff held his son close to his chest, realising that this was the only time Alan had or could be with both his mother and father. After twenty years maybe it was time he learnt to say goodbye to his wife, and in doing so could help his son learn how learn to say goodbye.

"Let's go home son. It's time to move on." Alan was broken from his thoughts by his father's words, he had no idea how long his father had been holding him, but it was going dark now.

The gardener watched as the pair of men finally stood up and moved away from the grave, they hadn't moved in hours, both looked like they had a lot on their minds. He watched the elder man lean down and gently brush his fingers over the carving of the name in the marble before smiling and turning back to the younger man. He knew what the elder man had done, as he had also turned a corner with his own grief many years ago for his wife. When the pain and sorrow is finally dealt with happier and joyful memories are retrieved, but like summer and winter or the sun or the moon one is always more dominant until you say your final goodbye to the ones you have lost.

"Goodbye Grace. I'll see you in the morning." The gardener smiled at his wife's grave before walking back down the path.

Four months later…

Jeff Tracy stood on the large balcony that emerged from the main lounge in his new home, it was a home now and not just a house, and that was due to his sons. A smile graced his face as his sons played in the pool below him. It was Gordon that wanted to play volleyball, but the official rules were lost quickly as all of them were diving on each other for the ball. Alan had been a little hesitant to play, and in the end Alan had given in if only to get some peace. He had been like that a lot lately, since Lana's death Alan hadn't left the island at all, and wanted to spend as much time alone as possible. Jeff couldn't even remember how many times in the past months he had tried to get Alan to talk about Lana's death, but like in the past each time he had failed. Instead he had insisted to his other sons that Alan be kept busy, and that wasn't difficult to do, Alan had little time to learn how all the machines worked. Jeff knew Alan could fly a jet like all his sons, however he was slightly surprised by Alan's talent in the air. The billionaire had wondered whether Alan had never mentioned his ability to fly a jet because Scott's talent in that field had overshadowed him. Scott had become even more protective of his brother's lately, and Jeff had noticed it more and more. The idea of them being in danger was getting to the young pilot. Jeff had spent a lot of time with his sons and had loved every moment, whether it be watching over their training, or flight simulations, or discussing the problems of expected natural hazards. He however was having problems separating being their boss from being their father. The last thing any father would want is to send their child into danger, yet here he was planning to send in all of his sons on a regular basis in to dangerous situations. His fatherly instincts just wanted them to stay safe and decide that this whole thing was a bad idea, but he couldn't give in to that. In any disaster or dangerous situations somebody's child would be sent to help, whether they are fire officers, police or the army. This way more lives would be saved from these incidents. He had a feeling that he wasn't the only one to struggle with this though, his younger sons were having to adjust to the balance also, especially Alan. Already Jeff had had many an argument with his youngest, all about IR and his role, in Alan's opinion he wasn't trusted to do anything without his brothers being present. However Jeff wasn't backing down at all. After a couple of hours of arguing and a cooling off period things would slowly get better between them. They were nowhere near as close as he was to his other sons, but then any improvement from where they were six months ago was a step in the right direction. Jeff snapped out of his thoughts when his sons approached up the steps to the house, towels attached to each of them.

"How did you ever think you won Gordon?" Virgil asked as they gentle shoved each other on the last few steps.

"Well you and Scott sure as hell didn't." Gordon protested before he noticed his father's presence.

"What did you think dad? Me and Alan won right?" Gordon moved closer to his dad, towelling off his hair as he approached.

Jeff scanned his sons, who were now standing before him, with pride and such love.

"Everything okay dad?" John asked, forgetting about the match for more important matters.

"Everything's fine son. We're ready to go." Jeff spoke with emotions of pride, fear and apprehension in his voice, and most of his sons shared a glance with each other. Nerves suddenly upon them all.

"Brains says were set to go?" Scott asked. They all had expected the final finish date for the launch of their rescue business to be soon, but it being right now was different.

"Were a go then." John spoke to confine the idea, and an eerier silence settled between them, each of them deep in thought.

Jeff looked over the five men before him, and considered the risk he was no putting them in, he was the leader of International Rescue, but right now he wanted to be a father to his sons.

"Come here." Jeff moved towards his sons, embracing Gordon deeply first, group hugs were difficult with five grown sons.

"I love you all so much, don't forget that." Jeff looked at each of his sons with emotion, as he continued to embrace each of them.

"This is it, International Rescue is go." Jeff stood confidently and dominantly as he finally set into motion over his dream.

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The newspaper was dropped on to the table; a picture of the International Rescue aircraft was not in the paper or on the news, as the cameras didn't work near the crafts. However having heard the details from eye witnesses and examining the sketches of the crafts he now knew for sure who was behind this organisation. He cast his mind back to the rough sketches he had seen Jeff Tracy draw in their days in the Air Force; they were now a reality in the form of Thunderbird One.

Three years previously he had accidentally come across a unique and high tech design for a section of an aircraft while examining the accounts and acquisitions for a manufacturing company that was owned by Barton industries. After examining who had made the order he found it had been sent by a new small company that designed submarine crafts. Although he wasn't convinced that this was the true source of the order due to the large amount effort that had been used to cover up its placement.

Months later more highly engineered ideas and orders were made through many separate companies who build parts for aircrafts. These orders to anyone else would have been easily pasted over, but by having information from Barton industries he had been able to put the pieces together like a jigsaw, and deemed that these were no ordinary specifications for a jet. Someone somewhere was creating an aircraft that was faster and more powerful than any government craft, its design was unique its ability unmatchable. He never managed to trace all the designs or parts of the crafts but he had seen enough for him to know those pieces were parts of the whole that now is the Thunderbird machines. To have the technology of the Thunderbirds meant the power to save lives all over the planet. However in the wrong hands the technology would cause terror in the world.

As he sat there in his hidden hide away Richard Barton considered that his life had shaped both the heroes and the villains of the International Rescue story.

Richard traced the small scar on his arm, it was a constant reminder of the day that the world thought he had died; the day Alan thought he had died. Years ago he had made the mistake of showing information to Ben James about the designs of the Thunderbirds that he had found. At the time he had no idea the dangerous and criminal deals Ben was involved in, and he couldn't have known that by doing this he had created International Rescue's greatest threat. Over the years Ben had become more secretive about the orders of these machines that together they had been tracking. So Richard began to check up on his partner more and more, only then realising Ben's contacts and communications were with terrorists and criminals.

He knew not agreeing to work with Ben James on that Saturday morning may months ago was dangerous, but Richard never realised Ben would sacrifice anything to get the technology he had been tracing. The plot to kill him was foiled by his own men, but only just. He had been informed by his own security of the bomb at his house and he had walked though the front door but had left just as swiftly though a side window, setting off the bomb as he went. A dead homeless man was already placed in the house along with some on his personal belonging and jacket he was wearing. Being alive was too dangerous now he had revealed he knew about Ben's plans. Also him being alive meant he was putting Alan in Ben's path, and that was a risk he wouldn't take. He had scarified his relationship with Alan, and caused Alan to have to deal with his 'death', but it was his only way to really try and stop Ben. As no one looked for a dead man, and be being in the shadows he could trace both Ben and Jeff.

Ben James had gone underground barely a week after his own 'death', but Richard knew his plan would be to steal the Thunderbirds, or get other people to do it for him. His only clue so far was someone heading a gang of criminals who was known only as 'General X', but Richard had high suspicions that this was Ben James.

Richard had considered that Alan would be safe from Ben's world now he was considered 'dead' however the accident with Lana told a different story, that car was meant for Alan, and Ben was behind the plot. Richard knew now he had to stop Ben at any cost, so he couldn't threaten anyone else. He had been monitoring Alan since he 'died' but that now had also stopped. Alan had vanished from society, and after seeing Jeff's other sons had also, Richard was sure who the members of International Rescue were. That wasn't holding up Jeff's part of the deal to look after his sons in Richard's mind, as far as he was concerned Jeff had failed to keep the promise he made to both himself and Lucy. Richard had a score to settle with both Jeff and Ben, and revenge was in his mind for both the hero and the villain.

The end

Thank you for reading Resentment, it has taken two years to write this story by myself and I have put a lot of myself into it. If you feel it was worth reading please review.

Thank you for all my reviewers and people who have asked me to finish this story, I wouldn't have without your help.

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